posted March 13, 2014 09:14 PM            

One of the things I hate doing is explaining myself to loved ones and closed ones. I expect them to know my needs and things I want. I don't know why?

Does anyone else feel like that ?
Like I know most Scorpios are supposed to be misunderstood geniuses.

I hate asking for things and help. ( I am working on asking help bit.) I sort of feel betrayed when my parents or relatives aren't considering my needs. I would be very angry after that.

I wonder how much one should really explain and not explain ?

Sometimes there is no explanation on decisions I take and I really do not want other people to get involved as it reduces my say on my own life.

Sometimes I take decision and it has nothing to do but pure intuition and somebody who is going to dissect it with facts and figures would be disappointed with them. Short term decision makes no sense but long term it makes complete sense overall. Only time it makes sense somebody like Gemini is after years.

To me to be understood is important but more importantly to me unconditionally supported is to be truly loved.

Being understood = Being supported = Being loved

and thus Not being understood = not being supported = not being loved

What is more frustrating is that even when you explain it people do not get it.

posted March 13, 2014 10:03 PM            

North Node in Scorpio 12th house.
Venus in Scorpio 11th house.
Sun/Mercury conjunct Antares in Sagittarius first house.

posted March 13, 2014 10:08 PM            

quote:

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One of the things I hate doing is explaining myself to loved ones and closed ones. I expect them to know my needs and things I want. I don't know why?

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I'm going to respond to this only because I've had A LOT of water signed friends over the years (specifically Scorpio, though more recently Pisces).

Water signs in general seem to have this particular feature of wanting everyone around them to be able to read their mind and/or emotions. Sometimes that is ok because water signs are almost always super expressive with their facial expressions/body language, so it is usually easy to know what it is that they want you to do or how they want you to respond. HOWEVER, it becomes a major problem when they are withholding something from you, whether it be an emotion or a thought process or whatever, on the basis that you are supposed to automatically "understand" them, and ultimately what they want you to do is read their mind because they feel uncomfortable expressing whatever it is they need to express. I find it to be upsetting when they refuse to at least meet you halfway by communicating some piece of the issue so you can at least TRY to figure it out. What I usually don't understand is why water signs tend to hold grudges when you really don't get it and they are refusing to communicate what it is that they want. They always go back to wanting you to automatically intuitively understand them without having to say anything, but the truth is that everyone is different, and ultimately, at some point no one can always read into the wants/needs of others without some kind of guidance.

Generally speaking though, water signs do USUALLY make it fairly easy for you to 'read' what it is they want or need and because they are emotionally sensitive themselves they pay attention and try to be kind and cater to the needs of the people around them as well (even the Scorpios, if they like you). This unusual open emotionality of the water signs usually lends to them being able to convey things of importance to the people around them, even if on a more subconscious level. BUT, if they think that a person just doesn't 'get' them (whether or not that's true), they will back away very quickly because I think it does feel to them, almost like a lack of connection or something (lack of love? betrayal?).

posted March 13, 2014 10:09 PM            

quote:

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One of the things I hate doing is explaining myself to loved ones and closed ones. I expect them to know my needs and things I want.

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I feel the same way. I have a Pisces Mercury.
Is your Mercury in Scorpio?
I've noticed this with water Mercuries.

Your words are part Aries though.. I must say.. because Aries generally feels like:

posted March 13, 2014 10:14 PM            

quote:

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How are we supposed to understand you if you don't explain yourself?

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*facepalm*

posted March 13, 2014 10:27 PM            

But people close to me know when I'm not smiling or being friendly they should avoid me unless I approach them LOL....
My father never got this and that's why are relationship is strained because he think I'm a dick
LOL okay LEO that only cares about his own needs

Like my mother knew not to disturb me when my door was closed not even to knock LOL.. same with my S.O...

posted March 13, 2014 10:29 PM            

I think it is just exhausting seeing that closed one wouldn't consider you at all. I think it is frustrating and as I said there is feeling of betrayal and disconnect.

I think it is expectation that if I would support you whole heatedly , so should you. If I love you unconditionally and support you unconditionally so should you.

Sometimes parents are smart and they have all this experience which they go on about but really they do not know most basic things which they should. Sometimes it is just frustrating and exhausting.

posted March 13, 2014 10:38 PM            

Fire signs assume it is personal and that I am insulting them by being cold..

Earth signs assume too unstable since I'm not always cold or outgoing.. since emotions tend to be more cool and constant with them. I remember my taurus best friend would ask me WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?

Air signs are more understanding of human behavior so they get that I'm not in a good mood it would be smart to avoid this person and try again later.

Water just understand and sort of support you from afar.

I remember a Pisces just embraced me and said I think you need some space huh?
I just started laughing..

posted March 13, 2014 10:53 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:
I feel the same way. I have a Pisces Mercury.
Is your Mercury in Scorpio?
I've noticed this with water Mercuries.

Your words are part Aries though.. I must say.. because Aries generally feels like:

'If you're not with me - then you're against me"... and
"If you don't 100% understand and support me then you're not with me.."

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No My Mercury is in Sag but I have 3rd House Pisces so I think maybe that is why ?

It doesn't help with black and white Scorpio approach with Aries Either/OR thing

Yes, I did think my post was quiet Aries and yes the whole impatience with not explaining comes from Aries energy because first thing happens to me is I get angry...very angry...

I am really trying to understand why does it bother me so much and I react so angrily when it should be easy for me to calmly state my case.

One of the 2 things would happen. a) I would silently suffer as I do not like confrontations. (venus in libra) or b) I either burst with anger and ruin whole relationship thinking they aren't going to help me. (Pluto in Scorpio)
I think it is actually I do not want their help after them initially been stupid and unable to understand. I just want to blame them or punish them.
It actually helps to take next steps by myself rather than relying on others. (Sag Stellium)

posted March 13, 2014 10:55 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:
*facepalm*

PS. People who ask this question ^ annoy me more than those who ask me to explain myself.

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posted March 13, 2014 10:58 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by deepseablues:
I explain myself to the ones who have proven to care. Most people do not want to take the time to understand what is really going on with me, there is a lot of complexities, contradictions and depth that most just don't care enough to even try to understand.
Then there are the people who just want to say your being negative or cynical for seeing it like it is and saying so.
Then the skeptics, I don't have time for them.
So yeah I explain myself. IF someone cares enough to truly listen.
My own parents never gave a f*ck about me so I don't expect anyone else to, maybe can't totally relate cause of that.

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That makes sense.

posted March 13, 2014 11:11 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by enchantress299:
What I usually don't understand is why water signs tend to hold grudges when you really don't get it and they are refusing to communicate what it is that they want. They always go back to wanting you to automatically intuitively understand them without having to say anything, but the truth is that everyone is different, and ultimately, at some point no one can always read into the wants/needs of others without some kind of guidance.

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I agree that it isn't right to expect other people to understand but sometimes it is frustrating to really for water signs themselves to know what they are feeling ? Sometimes water feels so muddy and overwhelming that they are hard to describe and there are layers of emotions and to fully sometimes understand it takes years.

Because our emotions are illogical and we ourselves know saying it out loud sounds stupid, intuition has no proof and there is fear of being laughed at. Sometimes it is just fear of being judged or looking stupid especially people who like to have everything practically with facts and figures.

It is also that if you are unable to understand simple thing then how will you understand more stuff?

I think it is catch 22 as well. Until we tell you crazy stuff we aren't going to trust you. Unless we trust you we aren't going to tell you.

Sometimes we tell you and until you see proof which might be years you wouldn't come around which is exasperating for intuitive people.

posted March 13, 2014 11:17 PM            

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Originally posted by ariestaurus:
How are we supposed to understand you if you don't explain yourself?! Lol my scorpio does weird things and doesn't explain, either. He is who he is, I guess!! Is it annoying when people ask you to explain?

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By being considerate and generous. That is only answer for you. Not asking why ? for everything. You do not need to have answers for every aspect of our life. You are suppose to understand by showing unconditional love,patience and wait for things to happen because we would love you in the same way.By giving us choice. By letting us know you are there even though you do not fully understand us at times.

By asking intelligent questions, by not deciding things for ourselves.

By not being control freak and try to put us in boxes.

posted March 13, 2014 11:31 PM            

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Originally posted by 4lifephrases:
By being considerate and generous. That is only answer for you. Not asking why ? for everything. You do not need to have answers for every aspect of our life. You are suppose to understand by showing unconditional love,patience and wait for things to happen because we would love you in the same way.By giving us choice. By letting us know you are there even though you do not fully understand us at times.

Yes, it is extremely annoying to explain every little thing we do as it restricts us and ability for us to be ourselves.

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We don't all have the same definition of "understand" then.

I would say I don't understand a lot that my cousin does, I find much about him baffling, from his romanticized views of Dixie to his love of Jackass to wanting everything to be as loud as it can be.

posted March 14, 2014 12:17 AM            

And btw, what exactly do you mean by "needs and wants"? Because some things are fairly obvious. Examples include comforting after a death, recognizing apprehension and offering comfort, looking to the needs of a pet you cherished or remembering you don't like unexpected guests so that they don't spring them on you, for example.

Other needs and wants are not so obvious. If someone asks if something is okay and you say it is when it's not then it's unreasonable for them to not take you at your word (and don't they deserve to be supported just as you do?), or to understand that's why you're mad at them when you won't say (especially as it's entirely possible to just be in a bad mood for reasons completely unrelated to the other person). I know of one guy who lost a girlfriend because he actually respected her wishes to "wait until marriage for sex" though he expressed his passionate interest and then she went with a guy who did not respect her stated wishes and had sex with her because that was what she really wanted, her stated intentions were a lie and she did not want to be respected, she just wanted him to take complete responsibility for the decision she felt too guilty to make for herself and said he should've just known (personally, I think he was better off without her). Another example of being unreasonable is refusing to give clues on what you'd like for a present and then getting upset when you don't get what you dreamed of getting. These examples are from real life. People who refuse to communicate but expect people to "know" should just take a vow of silence and communicate by ink blots or pantomiming, at least then whose who put up with them won't forget that they're supposed to ignore the words and GUESS.

As for supporting decisions even if they don't seem right is reasonable to expect from someone else...unless, say, your gambling addiction is out of control or you just have to eat out at expensive restaurants all the time and maxing out the credit cards when doing so not only destroys your finances but also your partners or say your kids.

posted March 14, 2014 12:41 AM            

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Originally posted by PixieJane:
We don't all have the same definition of "understand" then.

I would say I don't understand a lot that my cousin does, I find much about him baffling, from his romanticized views of Dixie to his love of Jackass to wanting everything to be as loud as it can be.

And yet, by your definition, I DO understand him. I've only barely touched on his love of the South, and haven't asked about things like why he finds Jackass so hilarious at all (actually, I figured it was a male thing, but I expect I'd be the same if he were female, just as I normally shrug it off when a man is a total fan of Twilight or even Sweet Valley High--and yes, I know a fairly macho guy who likes both). I absolutely loathe loud mufflers but tolerate his gracefully, I think Jackass is, with few exceptions, mostly idiotic and puerile, yet I would get it for him as a present if I found something of it he didn't have, and I even agreed to watch one with him while playing a drinking game (and I don't normally do drinking games). In my book I don't understand a lot about him (nor he about me) but I love and support him so in your book I do (and he does me). So I think it's important to realize that we're not all meaning the same thing by "understanding."

I'd also say you failed to understand what she was asking because what you said did not apply, at least not as far as I can see. Though that could be because I assume it was connected directly to what enchantress299 said.

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Yes, Pixie we all have different needs and have different definition of several words. It is very subjective. I have spoken specifically about my views and if you feel that I have imposed then I have not.

Pixie your support in buying DVD / watching show at least show you are making an attempt to understand him. That is way positive!
Compared to you being completely neglecting it or giving reasons why he should hate Jackass.

You have completely lost me at your last sentence and if you do not see the point of view then I respect that. We would let other people on the forum decide.

I think people here are mature enough to understand that we all are talking about personal subjective experiences. We aren't making sweeping judgements about particular sign and even when we do they are subjective based on our personal experiences.
I contribute with my experiences like everybody else. I am sorry that you feel that I am not contributing the way you want to but really I am not you and I would never be you.
I think you are in for lot of disappointment. Please be prepared for that.:-)

Sorry Pixie Jane Why do I keep getting feeling that every time I message like you want to pick up a fight or something?..lol... I am sure we have different views on certain things and your expectations from this board.
I do appreciate your input. I know you are quiet protective about what is being said about Scorpio sign or not.I am not sure if that is a good thing. However if you really feel that this in any way is degrading initial teaching of linda then I think you should put a note saying that views of members are subjective and do not bear any resemblance to linda's views or her teaching.
OR I do not mind putting in my signature that " Any views on Scorpio sign are mine, not as an expert astrologer or extensive statistical research but from my personal experience"....lol

If you have better advice please enlighten us and leave us with your piece of mind rather than saying no that is wrong. I find it highly unhelpful and ungrateful. Nobody has stopped you to give different answer to ariestaurus.

If you know better then share and be ready to be challenged or let us make mistake and be there supportively.I am sure you have been Scorpio longer than me and on the board as well. I do not see why your answer wouldn't help the post.

I tend to attract people who are just happy pointing out what is wrong and feeling good about themselves. I am hoping you are not one of them. :-)

posted March 14, 2014 12:55 AM            

As for the original post, do Scorpios explain themselves?

Sort of, when it comes to explaining, Scorps go through a process:

Anger
Vague statements about what is making them angry (that you are expected to understand)
Rejection of being angry
Being angry again
Avoidance of anyone they have shown how angry they are
Re-embrace of being angry and the ppl they talked with before about it
Acceptance of having "issues"

the whole thing never happened, that is to say, they will never talk about it again, but will completely recall how much one cared about them being angry in the first place..so watch what one says at that point, they will never forget it..like decades later will never forget it.

Good or bad..they will remember it

posted March 14, 2014 12:55 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ariestaurus:
It's a perfectly legitimate question. If someone doesnt understand me, I explain myself and help them understand. Why would a scorp not do the same

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Maybe it's legitimate but birds of a feather stick together and I feel more comfortable around those who understand me.

posted March 14, 2014 01:02 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:
Maybe it's legitimate but birds of a feather stick together and I feel more comfortable around those who understand me.

It's impossible to explain certain things. Either the other person is on your wavelength and they get you - or they don't.

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Scorpio to a "T"..you are "in" or you are "out"..for all of that though, a Scorpio will explain themselves..to ppl they trust..sort of..then keep an ear to the ground for blowback or rumor about things they've only told or shown..you

posted March 14, 2014 01:07 AM            

Fine, don't explain yourself. See if I care. I'm going to a party!

The Universe does not revolve around you dudes and I will not magically develop mind reading skills just because it annoys you to explain yourself. Get over yourself. I need a partner that talks instead of brooding and sulking. This is not 3rd grade already. Period.

I'm Aries Sun, Mercury and Mars. I know for one will stay away from Scorpios because clearly we're on different sides of the rainbow and can't see eye to eye. I am too impatient to wait around while you quietly do your own thing, it's not in my nature. Trust and support are earned not given for free. To be fully honest, I think it's childish to ask people to know what's going on in your head. Communicate, for goodness' sake! It won't kill you.