posted February 22, 2015 12:47 AM            

My Dom is also deeply sexually anorexic with very intense feelings about sex which cause him to be quite ... creative, is a good word, I feel.

The fear of pregnancy can be a strong factor. Many sexual anorexics are driven to be ascetic (by their own personality) for a variety of reasons: disease, pregnancy, etc. rather than religious principles or leanings.

Arousal versus the act is the fascinating divide, isn't it? He can be extremely erotic, but it took over a year to get to where engaging in the actual act isn't a constant up-in-the-air, maybe? possibly? sort of thing.

He's a Cancerian with ARIES MOON, and LIBRA MARS.

Hmmm. Y'know, 2 out of 3 ain't bad.

I've often felt that LIBRA MARS really does have a natural refinement about it; a classic sense of gentlemanly composition. Depending upon his ASC, I wonder if there might even be something to the degree.

In any case, I've found that involving the first three Cardinal energies in a T-Square with SUN and MARS, might lead to some rather interesting sexual hang-ups.

posted February 22, 2015 01:09 AM            

You are mystified because you aren't looking at the whole picture. Look at the declinations for this chart.

Moon in Virgo is at 5N50 declination. Saturn is at 4S55 declination. That is a contra-parallel aspect. It functions like an opposition.

Moon in Virgo can be picky enough. Now add Saturn to that mix.

Also Moon 5N50 is parallel Pluto 3N29. Sex has strong power implication issues and that probably narrows things even further as to what he is comfortable with. Most likely, he's just not very comfortable with himself yet. You'd think someone in their mid-30s (born in 1982) would be past that, but that is an assumption that is not necessarily fair to him.

Also Cancer rising -- if that is what he is (and it sounds possible) -- tends to withdraw in uncomfortable situations. Don't take it personally. Again, he's not entirely comfortable with himself. The most likely aspect to his Asc with Cancer rising is a contra-parallel with Neptune.

posted February 22, 2015 01:36 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Kannon McAfee:
That is a contra-parallel aspect. It functions like an opposition.

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posted February 22, 2015 01:39 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Orange:
I also have to mention two things he repeats frequently - he is afraid i may use him as a sex tool and he repeats very often - just tell me you are not with me for sex alone.
And the second thing he oftenly express -
"What if you get what you want ( sex with him), and then leave me to suffer.."
Fear of abandonment, maybe? ( moon square neptune)
Bur then again, sounds too controlling to me

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This sounds so ace to me. Personally. I know you're saying it doesn't seem asexuality spectrum to you, but so many of these personality traits are strong features.

I think Kannon is spot-on in regards to the MOON/SATURN contraparallel and you with the SUN/MOON/PLUTO parallel.

Sexuality can go to extremes here; it could be feast, but it can just as easily be famine. I'd say the biggest issue he has isn't the need to control others but himself. And yes, that kind of crazy self-control can have less-than-fabulous consequences on their sexuality.

posted February 22, 2015 02:23 AM            

It is a pity that the Venus position cannot be ascertained without the actual accurate birth-time;as the sign changes from Aquarius to Pisces at around 12 on the exact day he was born

But one thing I have observed about the energy differences in Pisces and Aquarius is that the former tends to throw themselves "all in" into the feeling experience of love whilst the latter opts to keep a cool head and detach.

So from what you describe,I am betting that Venus is in Aquarius more than Pisces.Due to this person's love of the mental and psychological game playings and buildup before sex as Air signs love the "idea" of sex more than the sex act itself.

And since Sun in Aries is opposed by "don't lose your cool" Saturn in peace-loving Libra(exalted),you can find that the individual expresses themselves in a very controlled,conservative fashion.

The joint Moon in Virgo/square Neptune and Sun in Aries/Saturn Libra opposition is where the conservative "don't call me babe" comes from.

Saturn conserves whatever it touches and Moon in Virgo has the tendency of wanting to maintain puritanical standards:They often do not condone being objectified as 'airhead' sex objects etc.

But there is a very big dichotomy and contradiction even in this. Because the interesting/kinky/aggressive approach to foreplay is very much Pluto opposite Sun.

I think the wide conjunction of Pluto to Saturn is where the repression to physical penetration sex stems from.

I think he wants to express this side-only from a very protected,secure and comfortable environment.

Saturn wants security and Pluto is budding sexuality that wants absolute expression.

The conjunction of the two suggests that he conserves this side but also wants to express it;hence the aggression "before" the actual act of sex.

This could be a way of him being able to release the tension of the Pluto build-up.He is "stealing" the expression of Pluto through this whole aggressive foreplay thing.

There could be a fear associated with releasing all that sexual energy(Sun opposite Saturn and Pluto conjunct Saturn). Like its "bad" or whatever and the subsequent guilt feelings associated with it(Saturn).

I suspect this has to to with the minor aspect of Moon in Virgo 26 to Pluto in Libra 25 also: A push/pull internal dilemma that is re-enforced by the Saturn mix between Sun/Pluto?

Because with the absence of Saturn, we would have the opposition of Sun to Pluto-extreme case of swinging between falling head-over heels in-love to wanting "out" when partners get too clingy.

The type of person who wants the sex and makes the partner think they "love" them, but has difficulty maintaining interest long-term etc.

He needs to deal with the guilt associated with sex.Having sex does not make one "impure" and it is OK to consummate love with sexual experience.Letting go once in a while is OK.

posted February 22, 2015 12:35 PM            

Edit2: thanks.

Cancer rising, Pisces Venus in the 8th trine Pluto, sextile Neptune, square the 8th house ruler (funnily it's Uranus), I can see why he's careful sex...assuming it's not some stupid game.