posted December 19, 2015 12:20 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by athenegoddess:
Do any of your planet's square his?

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posted December 19, 2015 12:21 PM            

What about Saturn?

posted December 19, 2015 12:23 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by wheresthemoon:
First of all, depending on what you mean by "its your fault" it sounds like you may be in an emotionally abusive relationship. A lot of unhealthy couples will burst out with "I hate you!" during a fight but to say this repeatedly in a cold way is extremely emotionally abusive.

Second, he does not hate you. He may "feel" hatred at the moment, but if you love someone it does not turn to plain, all out hatred at the drop of a hat. More than likely he is just emotionally immature and does not know how to express whatever pain you caused him.

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posted December 19, 2015 12:24 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by athenegoddess:
That's not a good sign.

What about Saturn?

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posted December 19, 2015 12:25 PM            

I will start by saying that through my Aries man, I have come to realize that words don't seem to mean anything. To him. I will follow that up by saying that words mean everything to me. If I say I hate you, well, I hate you, and that is a feeling that will most likely be permanent. I am REALLY careful with what I say to people because I am one of those that have depth in what I say, so it sticks like glue.

Secondly, is this a behavior you like? Will tolerate? Because if you do, you have set the tone for how he KNOWS he can behave later on. And trust me, he will behave....worse.

Put a stop to it!!!

Thirdly, this is not astrology based but instead, a truly flawed type of behavior towards another human being.

posted December 19, 2015 12:28 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by charlie:
Oh boy, where to start!? O.O

I will start by saying that through my Aries man, I have come to realize that words don't seem to mean anything. To him. I will follow that up by saying that words mean everything to me. If I say I hate you, well, I hate you, and that is a feeling that will most likely be permanent. I am REALLY careful with what I say to people because I am one of those that have depth in what I say, so it sticks like glue.

Secondly, is this a behavior you like? Will tolerate? Because if you do, you have set the tone for how he KNOWS he can behave later on. And trust me, he will behave....worse.

Put a stop to it!!!

Thirdly, this is not astrology based but instead, a truly flawed type of behavior towards another human being.

Forthly (yeah, I invented that word!), IF we were to base this on astrology, my Cap Moon would only say these things if I were really miserable and found no strength in telling you like a decent woman.

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posted December 19, 2015 12:31 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by charlie:
Oh boy, where to start!? O.O

I will start by saying that through my Aries man, I have come to realize that words don't seem to mean anything. To him. I will follow that up by saying that words mean everything to me. If I say I hate you, well, I hate you, and that is a feeling that will most likely be permanent. I am REALLY careful with what I say to people because I am one of those that have depth in what I say, so it sticks like glue.

Secondly, is this a behavior you like? Will tolerate? Because if you do, you have set the tone for how he KNOWS he can behave later on. And trust me, he will behave....worse.

Put a stop to it!!!

Thirdly, this is not astrology based but instead, a truly flawed type of behavior towards another human being.

Forthly (yeah, I invented that word!), IF we were to base this on astrology, my Cap Moon would only say these things if I were really miserable and found no strength in telling you like a decent woman.

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posted December 19, 2015 12:37 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by charlie:
Oh boy, where to start!? O.O

I will start by saying that through my Aries man, I have come to realize that words don't seem to mean anything. To him. I will follow that up by saying that words mean everything to me. If I say I hate you, well, I hate you, and that is a feeling that will most likely be permanent. I am REALLY careful with what I say to people because I am one of those that have depth in what I say, so it sticks like glue.

Secondly, is this a behavior you like? Will tolerate? Because if you do, you have set the tone for how he KNOWS he can behave later on. And trust me, he will behave....worse.

Put a stop to it!!!

Thirdly, this is not astrology based but instead, a truly flawed type of behavior towards another human being.

Forthly (yeah, I invented that word!), IF we were to base this on astrology, my Cap Moon would only say these things if I were really miserable and found no strength in telling you like a decent woman.

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posted December 19, 2015 01:11 PM              

quote:

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Originally posted by Jounia:
Hi all. I really need some advice.
My boyfriend with whom I live and have a son with has told me after a fight mid week that he hates me. He's called me all the names under the sun, and told me several times that he hates me. He's even gone as far as saying he doesn't care f I want to go off and sleep with other men (this is totally out of the blue and not connected to the fight and of course im not going to and have reassured him that I won't be doing that). For him, who is extremely possessive, to say that is something very big.
Obviously he is hurt but how do I find out if he is just angry and hurt or if he really does hate me?
I am like a desperate loser at the moment, begging for forgiveness (it is my fault) and crying at his feet. He won't sleep in the same bed as me.
What should I do? How should I handle this? Shut up and leave him alone or be persistent in a desperate bid to show him I am so sorry and cannot live without him?

Any help would be greatly appreciated! I can't lose this man!!!

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posted December 19, 2015 01:23 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by lundan:
what are his placements (moon, venus, etc)

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posted December 19, 2015 01:25 PM              

quote:

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Originally posted by Jounia:
Moon in Pisces, Venus in Aqua, merc in cap, Mars in sag

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posted December 19, 2015 01:35 PM            

The things that can be upsetting to a Capricorn Sun, Moon or stellium - are:

- Being held back from personal achievement. If someone constantly rains on their parade - or, if they require so much constant attention that Capricorn has no more time left for themselves.

- People who are highly emotional, or erratic - and have no logic, rhyme or reason to their behaviour.

- People who will not take responsibility for themselves in either a practical/financial sense or a psychological sense - and they have the "expectation" (as opposed to mere desire) that Capricorn "should" parent them.

- People who come across as deliberately "lazy". For instance, a 40 year old in good health (mental and physical) who is living with their mother and playing video games all day.

- People who are untrustworthy, unreliable and keep breaking the Capricorn's trust - or betraying them in some way. e.g. Being a "user" and constantly trying to milk Capricorn for money.

- Any kind of abusive, aggressive behaviour - whether verbal or physical won't be tolerated. They expect people to put their point across with more calm.

^^^ I can't think of much else at the moment. However, even if a person did some or "all" of the above - it's still uncharacteristic of Capricorn to react this way. An angry Capricorn would pick you apart and criticise you in great detail (similar to Virgo), but he/she would do it in a calm way. A *very* angry Capricorn would make a decision to completely cut you out - if they already tried everything else.
The only context in which Capricorn would put on such a show - would be something done in self defence, if they literally felt "in danger" of being attacked.

And they don't normally "hate" people at all (let alone say it out loud), since hate requires a soap-opera style "passion" - that Capricorn lacks.
For instance, Daria's character is highly sarcastic but calm - not angry, emotional or hateful. This character is pretty symbolic of Capricorn behaviour.

But that's just what I see as Capricorn - the sign.
A Capricorn person could behave differently depending on their overall chart. It's difficult to generalise based on Sun signs and get it right.

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Now... looking at this situation - from a purely psychological, non-astrological perspective... under "normal" circumstances - there isn't much that can excuse this guys behaviour towards you.
There can be explanations for it in astrology (e.g. A water Moon sign, square Uranus) - but there are no "excuses".

Regardless of what you did or said, there are mature/adult ways to react. And there are other ways to react - that are more characteristic of mental disorder, or behavioural issues (like - lacking anger-management skills).

This emotional outburst would be characteristic of a teenager. At that stage of development, it would be psychologically "typical" or "sound".
But for an adult male who is a father and has a family to react like a teenager - seems a bit "off" psychologically.

Again, this is completely regardless of anything you personally did to him.
It simply doesn't matter what you did. Because his reaction, in and of itself - is completely "out of place".

Another explanation would be - if he was on drugs or alcohol at this time?
But if he was sober, I would go back to "possible mental disorder".

As others have said, he may well be abusive towards you - mainly of this wasn't the first time.

The disorders I have personally dealt with in my life - that I feel are most relevant here - are bipolar and/or borderline personality disorder. Both lack healthy emotional coping skills.
I wondering whether he has been diagnosed with anything along these lines. If he has not, then please read about the symptoms to these disorders and inform yourself - to see whether he may be displaying this kind of "pattern of behaviour".

If this is a pattern and the relationship has become abusive, you must leave! For your sake and for your child's sake.

Your own reaction here - of blaming yourself for absolutely everything makes me feel like - you are not very "well" overall.. and maybe feel thrown out of balance by this relationship.
There is also a possibility you have some serious psychological pain/problems yourself - and I think it would be really helpful for you to see a therapist about all this - and talk things over.
Many times those who make the choice to stay in a relationship with someone suffering (untreated) bpd or bipolar - have some emotional/psychological problems of their own.

posted December 19, 2015 02:25 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Jounia:
Moon in Pisces, Venus in Aqua, merc in cap, Mars in sag

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Just like my sister - and when she decided I was dead to her, she almost made it a reality.

I waited for things to get better, but she was set in her mind, about the way things were going to be - and she got away with it, because she was perfectly fine with others (on the surface). Now I feel like I've been infected with the toxicity. I was getting diagnosed by an aunt who wasn't even present, and she was advising the abusive sister.

I don't know what happened, but I would express yourself once more, and that's it. If you were in the wrong, apologize. If it was really bad, admit that. I wonder if it triggered something bad in him - my sister was acting out of deep insecurity, I'm sure, but she would never admit to it.

posted December 19, 2015 02:41 PM            

My chart is very similar to his, we have an ASC conjunction, we're both Cap suns, afflicted 8H Pisces moons with Chiron-MC in Aries (and other generational conjunctions of course.) He's almost exactly a year younger than me.

Your synastry is nice and he might really love you. Plus, Capricorn duty will make him not want to give up on his family. But depending on the level of hurt he feels, he could keep you at an emotional distance for a long time, even if you make up.

I think your Neptune on his Mars makes it hard for him to decide what to do.

Your sun and moon hitting his moon probably makes it so that your asking for forgiveness really gets through to him and makes him feel better.

But his Mercury squaring your Pluto on his IC is voicing the full resentment of Pluto-IC synastry gone bad. He probably deeply trusted you, and now feels kinda destroyed.

posted December 19, 2015 02:47 PM            

But the composite is not very indicative of long-term happiness, not with the sun-moon-Mercury t-square. Binding...but are you happy?

posted December 19, 2015 02:55 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by teasel:
Don't be a doormat, though. Don't keep telling him that you can't live without him.

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posted December 19, 2015 03:18 PM            

leave him alone... don't beg girl! get back up, let him steam off his anger (whatever it is)... see if he will come around.

posted December 19, 2015 03:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Jounia:
Thank you. I think I have been the emotionally abusive one. I deserve what he is dishing out, and am disgusted with myself that it's taken him to tell me he hates me for me to realise what I've done to him. I just want to be given the chance to change and love him the way he deserves but I'm not sure if there is still a chance.

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posted December 19, 2015 09:42 PM            

Any man worth his weight as a man who loves you would have nothing vile to say about you, ever. Period. People do not say hurtful things to people they love.