posted December 19, 2015 02:48 PM            

I am
11/03/1984 - San Diego
Sun - Scorp
Moon - Pisces
Venus - Sag
Mars - Cap

He is
12/22/1980 - Sacramento
Sun - Cap
Moon - Cancer
Venus - Sag
Mars - Cap

I met him for one date and it was incredible chemistry. I could tell that he was feeling it to by the way that he looked at me. He held my hand, even kissed the back of my hand, my cheek, covered me with his coat while we were waiting for valet. So much in common - it was deep and philosophical but also light-hearted and fun. He showed me how I was the top search on his social media and that he had peeped me out prior too. Finding my business, watching all of my videos online. Told me how beautiful I was on several occasions. Kept saying he didn't want the date to end. Even ordered another tea so we could stay longer. I left with so much confidence, like there's no way I won't see this guy again. This type of connection for me was rare and very refreshing.

Days passed - and nothing... crickets.
By the 4th day I thought well, what the hell. I didnt thank him for the date, so to make sure that he knew I was into it I sent him a message thanking him and saying I really enjoyed sharing time with him (also made a comment about a fav team of his who lost a winning streak and sent him a funny video -inside joke to make sure h was holdin' up ok) He wrote back within the hour - said he really had a great time too and thanked me for the pick-me-up and made a few other comments about the team... that was it.

Just to mention - I have been single for about a year, did some major healing this year and recently getting back in the dating game. I choose to navigate this field by "being" the person I wish to attract. Straightforward, honest, transparent, vulnerable. I have no intention on chasing a guy, but I do think its important to use this time to exercise being real ad being me.

So after thinking about it, I decided well it's apparent he's not interested. To me a guy who is interested - he's initiating contact, making a plan etc.

So I wrote him again saying:

"On the night of meeting you my experience was that of a mutual good-vibe happening but now it seems to me that you're not quite feelin' continuing to know me, at least in a romantic sense, and thats totally cool. Really, I can handle that. I know most people would just let it go but I try to show up on my life the way I would like others to - stright forward, honest, perhaps at times a bit vulnerable. I don't know you well enough to say I can see myself with you, however I do know that I like your energy very much and I am very much so open to being friends if you are. Either way I wish you well in your search for love and happy holidays."

He wrote back like an hour later:
"I feel the same way, by that I mean I love your energy and want to be in your company often..."

Hmmmm... see I like a man who has a proportionate ratio of words and action. So this response is nice, but is that all it is... just him trying to be nice even though I gave him an out.

You see, I'm trying to tell - are they red flags? I've never dated a cap although I've been told in nurmerous readings that this is a prefect sign for me. I've read a lot about how slow moving they are, how it's hard to tear down walls in the beginning, how it requires much patience. I am not used to this kind of behavior if a man likes me and I take it as an indication of lack of interest - but because of the connection I felt, and what I've read of his sign it has me wondering.

posted December 19, 2015 02:58 PM            

To me -- all these are indications of a guy who is interested, how he behaved on the date. The body language, pulling my chair closer to his.

His last response about him loving my energy and wanting to be in my company often left me even more confused...
1) if thats the case then why hasnt he made a plan to see me... been a week now.
2) was it jut a nice way to let me down? or say he wanted to be friends too.
3) is this the typical preliminary stages with a capricorn?

posted December 19, 2015 03:13 PM            

was best friends with a cap and dated him after for years. they are SUPER SLOW!! lol (by slow, i mean like snail like sloooooooooooooow)

keep doing your own thing, if he reaches back and take you on another date, wonderful, if not, then there are PLENTY of fish in the sea

posted December 19, 2015 03:17 PM            

I would ask him to clarify - "In what context? Dating or just friends?"

posted December 19, 2015 03:54 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by bluestskies88:
don't reach out again please. you asserted your thoughts and feelings enough.

keep doing your own thing, if he reaches back and take you on another date, wonderful, if not, then there are PLENTY of fishes in the sea

good luck! <3

---

^ This!

quote:

---

Originally posted by rcllns:

So I wrote him again saying:

"On the night of meeting you my experience was that of a mutual good-vibe happening but now it seems to me that you're not quite feelin' continuing to know me, at least in a romantic sense, and thats totally cool. Really, I can handle that. I know most people would just let it go but I try to show up on my life the way I would like others to - stright forward, honest, perhaps at times a bit vulnerable. I don't know you well enough to say I can see myself with you, however I do know that I like your energy very much and I am very much so open to being friends if you are. Either way I wish you well in your search for love and happy holidays."

What do you guys think..?? I'm not going to reach out to him again at this point... it's clear I'm open and interested.

---

One of my besties has similar placements to yours. She is a Pisces sun, Scorpio moon, Venus in cap. Being the case, I'm gonna speak to you like I'd speak to her...

Now, I usually don't give relationship advice because I suck at relationships, but I'll give you my impression as a cap moon and somebody who knows a cap sun/cancer moon man... Texting him with what you did would have creeped me out. It was one date! What are you expecting?! Give it time. It seems desperate and needy. Not saying you are, but that's the impression it gives. Try to just enjoy it for what it was. What you wrote feels like an ultimatum, and it's way too soon for that. It's like you're trying to force the relationship (don't know what else to call it) into a category or direction that has yet to be decided. It feels rushed. On top of that, your words kinda betray you actions, and that is a red flag. This is all just MY impression though.

Now about the man I know: he is very picky (unrealistically high standards - Venus in Pisces). Likes to keep his options open. Doesn't really do relationships that well. Very busy. Has lots of interests. Travels a lot. The sun/moon opposition may be hard to reconcile.

I do admire your initiative though! You've totally put yourself out there! Very impressive. Stick to your plan.

posted December 19, 2015 04:36 PM            

quote:

---

Sun opposition Moon:

People born when the Sun opposes the Moon have an internal struggle between their needs and their wants. In contrast to the Sun-Moon conjunction personality, the Full Moon personality is inclined towards lack of focus and indecision. Their ability to be objective is both an asset and a liability, simply because when they decide on one route, they are pulled in another direction at the same time. Something tugs at them, and they begin to question their stance. "But what if..." and "on the other hand..." are statements they can't help making and that plague them. While Sun conjunct Moon people have an Aries style about them, Sun opposition Moon natives have a distinct Libra energy about them, in that they are always aware of the opposing point of view, the other side of the coin, and so forth.

Their inner struggle is most obvious in their vitality, as both the Sun and the Moon strongly influence the vitality. They have many ups and downs, and it is hard to know if it is physical or emotional. In fact, it's likely both. These people might spend a week working hard, and the following week they lack motivation and find it hard to accomplish much. Their energy fluctuates more than most people, and it is very much a reflection of what is going on inside.
http://www.cafeastrology.com/natal/sunoppositionmoon.html

---

Does that shed some insight on his behavior?!

Edit:

posted December 19, 2015 10:28 PM            

He's venus isnt in pisces - its in sag. Same as mine.

Also, yes you may think its too much for a first date but I think its me being honest and showing genuine interest. I'm not chasing after the guy... I'm just asking for clarity.

If a man shows up with me like this, first date or not, and its such a strong magnetic connection... which for me is beyond rare... of course I'm going to be straight forward and ask if it's one sided. Especially after having that experience then not hearing from him several days later... Also, romantic or not I just "like" him and really wanted a friendship with him. That kind of desire is also rare for me. I'm not a social bizzy bee who develops friends with so many people.

I think too many women play a game, don't show genuine interest because they dont want to scare the man off. But if a man is looking only for the chase then he'll lose interest as soon as he gets you anyway. I don't want a man like that. My last relationship was the deepest most profound love I ever had and from the get go I was very direct and honest with this man and it got me places.

Granted - the relationship didnt work long term, but it was def a soul contract that needed to be worked out and one of the most meaningful and transformative relationship of my life.

So, I don't feel bad or regretful for reaching out to him and being real. I guess the biggest thing out of all of this was questioning my judgment or ability to determine a genuine connection.

On the other hand after so much pain and healing over this past year since the failure of my last relationship, It feels great to actually have the capacity to feel this again I admire my heart for that...

posted December 20, 2015 04:25 AM            

Also I think you were very open with him which I personally think it's great but I think for a lot of men that would be way too forward which is why his answer was short and some what confusing. Women play games, but so do men too. my experience has showed me that being a bit mysterious and distant always works with any guy, because naturally they love to seduce no matter what their sign is! They love the challenge and they love to have something that they can't have lol it's so weird but it's true!

posted December 20, 2015 11:47 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by rcllns:

I think too many women play a game, don't show genuine interest because they dont want to scare the man off. But if a man is looking only for the chase then he'll lose interest as soon as he gets you anyway. I don't want a man like that. My last relationship was the deepest most profound love I ever had and from the get go I was very direct and honest with this man and it got me places.

Daring to love, vulnerably and sharing your heart is attractive. Living your life with integrity and being true to your word is attractive.

---

in an ideal sense yes, but capricorns are not idealistic, they are more practical.

perhaps, his venus in sag will come out, and he will be more forward. it's only been a week, yeah? wait if you can...

posted December 20, 2015 11:50 AM            

Source: Man. Capricorn Sun. Capricorn Mars.

My personal opinion is that the "go slow" thing is a load of BS. This Capricorn man zeros in like a fast moving missile.

posted December 20, 2015 11:53 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by rcllns:
Hi there,

I am
11/03/1984 - San Diego
Sun - Scorp
Moon - Pisces
Venus - Sag
Mars - Cap

He is
12/22/1980 - Sacramento
Sun - Cap
Moon - Cancer
Venus - Sag
Mars - Cap

I met him for one date and it was incredible chemistry. I could tell that he was feeling it to by the way that he looked at me. He held my hand, even kissed the back of my hand, my cheek, covered me with his coat while we were waiting for valet. So much in common - it was deep and philosophical but also light-hearted and fun. He showed me how I was the top search on his social media and that he had peeped me out prior too. Finding my business, watching all of my videos online. Told me how beautiful I was on several occasions. Kept saying he didn't want the date to end. Even ordered another tea so we could stay longer. I left with so much confidence, like there's no way I won't see this guy again. This type of connection for me was rare and very refreshing.

Days passed - and nothing... crickets.
By the 4th day I thought well, what the hell. I didnt thank him for the date, so to make sure that he knew I was into it I sent him a message thanking him and saying I really enjoyed sharing time with him (also made a comment about a fav team of his who lost a winning streak and sent him a funny video -inside joke to make sure h was holdin' up ok) He wrote back within the hour - said he really had a great time too and thanked me for the pick-me-up and made a few other comments about the team... that was it.

Just to mention - I have been single for about a year, did some major healing this year and recently getting back in the dating game. I choose to navigate this field by "being" the person I wish to attract. Straightforward, honest, transparent, vulnerable. I have no intention on chasing a guy, but I do think its important to use this time to exercise being real ad being me.

So after thinking about it, I decided well it's apparent he's not interested. To me a guy who is interested - he's initiating contact, making a plan etc.

So I wrote him again saying:

"On the night of meeting you my experience was that of a mutual good-vibe happening but now it seems to me that you're not quite feelin' continuing to know me, at least in a romantic sense, and thats totally cool. Really, I can handle that. I know most people would just let it go but I try to show up on my life the way I would like others to - stright forward, honest, perhaps at times a bit vulnerable. I don't know you well enough to say I can see myself with you, however I do know that I like your energy very much and I am very much so open to being friends if you are. Either way I wish you well in your search for love and happy holidays."

He wrote back like an hour later:
"I feel the same way, by that I mean I love your energy and want to be in your company often..."

Hmmmm... see I like a man who has a proportionate ratio of words and action. So this response is nice, but is that all it is... just him trying to be nice even though I gave him an out.

You see, I'm trying to tell - are they red flags? I've never dated a cap although I've been told in nurmerous readings that this is a prefect sign for me. I've read a lot about how slow moving they are, how it's hard to tear down walls in the beginning, how it requires much patience. I am not used to this kind of behavior if a man likes me and I take it as an indication of lack of interest - but because of the connection I felt, and what I've read of his sign it has me wondering.

What do you guys think..?? I'm not going to reach out to him again at this point... it's clear I'm open and interested. But I'm curious to know what others think in regards to his behavior and what it means

---

posted December 20, 2015 12:00 PM            

And the "go slow" and "practical" thing is a load of hooey. So, if you were drowning in a river, he'll come to you after he finishes work? You are not important to him. End of story.

posted December 20, 2015 12:05 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways:
Capricorn is the sign of business. A prudent businessman thinks before making an important decision. A prudent businessman also doesn't hang around to let opportunities slip by. You are not at the top of his priorities. Move on.

And the "go slow" and "practical" thing is a load of hooey. So, if you were drowning in a river, he'll come to you after he finishes work? You are not important to him. End of story.

My BS meter is reading full blast. Again, from a Capricorn man with Capricorn Mars.

---

posted December 20, 2015 01:31 PM            

The ironic thing about "looking" for love is that you don't find it when you are looking.

Your intentions are solid.You are putting yourself out there with the intentions of finding someone.

And it is clear that you are excited and ready to open yourself up.

But I would say that IME, you never find what you are looking for when "looking". And when its good, really good and genuine. It's very easy. It literally falls on your lap.

We are all so used to believing that good things come through hard work. That one has to toil and put effort, put themselves on the line before anything worthwhile comes along.

That you have to go through hell to get to heaven. That's not true. Just stop moving.

You may have shared a great date with a guy that you had loads in common with. But be careful about jumping the gun to thinking that this could spell romance. No matter the man.

In this instance, the Cap is being the usual stoic self.

But say you guys went on a second date and things got better. Then you got intimate. I would imagine that it would hurt incredibly more if the person got distant in much the same way.

Astrologically he has Venus in Sag with Cancer Moon. Neither one wants to tie themselves to anything. But for differing reasons.

His Venus probably just wants to first be friends. Whilst the Cancer Moon may be yearning for something deeper. But refraining from showing it all just yet.

So you are in for some back/forth action from this dude.

Astrology aside. Keep on dating and open yourself up to a rewarding social life.

What will happen(as it often does) is that the minute you take your mind off him.He will call you.

By then, you may have already changed your mind about him. And it may be too late. And on the merry go round of love we go

I don't like what is happening here. It should feel easy, be easy and all that.

You shouldn't have to be asking for advice from us in the beginning stages of how to "read" someone you clearly felt you had a connection with.

I am not criticizing you. I just think that you should keep going. He was just a sample and not necessarily the meal-so to speak.

posted December 20, 2015 02:03 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by rcllns:
He's venus isnt in pisces - its in sag. Same as mine.

---

Oh, yes – I am aware. I was giving an example of the behavior of a cap sun/cancer moon man I know, and hIS (my friend’s) Venus is in Pisces.

quote:

---

Originally posted by rcllns:
Also, yes you may think its too much for a first date but I think its me being honest and showing genuine interest. I'm not chasing after the guy... I'm just asking for clarity.

---

Ya know… In situations like these, I always feel like if a guy doesn’t make it happen, it’s not even worth the wondering about.

quote:

---

Originally posted by rcllns:
If a man shows up with me like this, first date or not, and its such a strong magnetic connection... which for me is beyond rare... of course I'm going to be straight forward and ask if it's one sided. Especially after having that experience then not hearing from him several days later... Also, romantic or not I just "like" him and really wanted a friendship with him. That kind of desire is also rare for me. I'm not a social bizzy bee who develops friends with so many people.

---

I feel conflicted about carrying on and commenting on this, but… The thing that raises red flags (for me) about your behavior is you didn’t JUST ask for clarity. You went on to say things like: “it seems to me that you're not quite feelin' continuing to know me, at least in a romantic sense, and thats totally cool. Really, I can handle that.” I feel like if this were true, it would go unsaid. A lot of women say these things GENUINELY feeling like they can be “mature” about it and do the “just friends” thing - but fail miserably. It's like they just offer themselves up when they should assert some boundaries and get in touch with what they really want. It's not friendship.

quote:

---

Originally posted by rcllns:
I think too many women play a game, don't show genuine interest because they dont want to scare the man off.

---

Be careful because offering friendship like you have while expressing romantic desire is a major conflict of interest. It seems more in line with the behavior you are trying to avoid. The women you are describing may not be much different from you. situations like the one you are in are too common. You have a lot of control in deciding how this plays out. Be smart.

My bias is with the trend, and it’s unfavorable.

Things like this happen all the time: http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum10/HTML/004992.html

Then the self-loathing begins to set in: how could I have been so foolish, blind, unaware...

It looks like you're not very far from there (quote below) and nothing even happened.

quote:

---

Originally posted by rcllns:
So, I don't feel bad or regretful for reaching out to him and being real. I guess the biggest thing out of all of this was questioning my judgment or ability to determine a genuine connection.

On the other hand after so much pain and healing over this past year since the failure of my last relationship, It feels great to actually have the capacity to feel this again I admire my heart for that...

Daring to love, vulnerably and sharing your heart is attractive. Living your life with integrity and being true to your word is attractive.

---

Yeah, I notice the confusion, but really – you have all the answers you need. Situations like these are really good learning experiences. Don't leave it in HIS hands. You’ve set your standard. Be decisive. Move on from anything that is in conflict with your values and expectations (within reason of course). Who has time for anything less?! Like Aries says above: "I don't like what is happening here. It should feel easy, be easy and all that."

posted December 20, 2015 02:06 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
I love your energy Just by reading this.

---

posted December 20, 2015 05:17 PM            

I experienced the same thing with a Pisces guy a few months ago. Great date, lots of laughs, he put his arm around me and we ended the date with an awesome kiss. He even asked me out for a second date while we were only 30 minutes into the date.

Then the next day he suddenly "got relocated" at work, and "really hoped we could hang out if he got back." He eventually told me the "move" was permanent. I still don't know what to believe about the whole situation. I think he might have been married. But regardless if he was interested he would have made more of an effort.

posted December 23, 2015 10:12 PM            

But why over the past few days has he been liking my photos on instagram?

After it being nearly 2 weeks since seeing the guy, not once has he initiated contact or asked me out again. However he says he loves my energy, wants to be in my company often and is obviously scrolling through my social media on a normal basis.

I don't get it...

posted December 24, 2015 04:34 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by rcllns:
I totally agree with what everyone has said.

But why over the past few days has he been liking my photos on instagram?

After it being nearly 2 weeks since seeing the guy, not once has he initiated contact or asked me out again. However he says he loves my energy, wants to be in my company often and is obviously scrolling through my social media on a normal basis.

I don't get it...

I know I need to let this one go, I just don't quite know how and why is it that I am so consumed with the complexities of this guy? If nothing else, I was just really looking forward to his friendship

---

I think it's brave that you put yourself out there (shout out to the Sag venus ). But like everyone here opined, it's time to sit back and let him come to you - if he wants to, he will. Otherwise, it's his loss!!

It's a rare woman that's secure enough not to play games.