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Author
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Topic: Is there anyway to tell through astrology why my parents are so protective?
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ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 02:54 PM
  
Is there any way I can tell through astrology charts why my parents are overprotective? I have Saturn in the 4th house so I know that's part of the reason. But I just wish they weren't so protective of me. I'm 29 and I do still live at home I really like to travel. But they always tell me I shouldn't travel alone it's really to the point that I don't know what to do anymore. I lie to them about where I am going because I know they will give me a hard time. I hope there is a way I can break free of all this during my Saturn Return. I understand why they are concerned but I just want to be able to go places without them knowing. IP: Logged |
Electro DGX
Knowflake Posts: 1132
From: Plutanus/Uruno
Registered: Jul 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 02:58 PM
Could you post your chart? It would make figuring out the reason behind your parents doing this easier  ------------------
Aquarius Sun, Merc, Venus, Uranus, Neptune
Scorpio Mars conj. Asc in First
8th House Moon opposite Pluto, Trine Uranus
Have you caught onto the predicament I'm in yet? IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 03:01 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Electro DGX:
Could you post your chart? It would make figuring out the reason behind your parents doing this easier
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Electro DGX
Knowflake Posts: 1132
From: Plutanus/Uruno
Registered: Jul 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 03:08 PM
Of course; I was expecting to see some sort of Moon-Pluto contact in your chart. With the Moon representing the Mother, Moon-Pluto hard contacts can indicate a mother who could've been obsessive with protecting her child as she told the child dark stories about the world and become overly-protective of the child. It's possible that she may try to be overly protective of you in ways of instilling fear so that you don't go out into the world and she can "protect" you as is being stated. With your Sun opposite Pluto, your father could've been the same way, yet it's possible that he may have not been as strict about it because of how wide the orb is. Saturn in the 4th as you mentioned is an indicator, since Saturn restricts and being in the 4th restricts your home life in some way (it is in detriment in this house). You also have a wide square between the Moon and Midheaven. Even though it's quite wide, it's possible that it may add onto your parents' protective tendencies and make them want to shield you from the world. Overall though I think Pluto is the biggest benefactor here; considering that Pluto can be obsessive about anything. ------------------
Aquarius Sun, Merc, Venus, Uranus, Neptune
Scorpio Mars conj. Asc in First
8th House Moon opposite Pluto, Trine Uranus
Have you caught onto the predicament I'm in yet? IP: Logged |
venus2tinkerbell
Knowflake Posts: 1988
From: the baseball hall of fame
Registered: Nov 2014
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posted July 27, 2016 03:11 PM
Scorpio 4th house maybe?IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 03:11 PM
I don't know what to do anymore they just keep giving me a hard time in regards to traveling. I like to go visit my friend that lives in another state. But they just tell me I can't go or that I'm crazy for wanting to travel alone. I've been meeting up with a friend and my parents don't know about it. I have Venus in Pisces in the 8th house. I don't want them finding out about me going to visit this guy because I know they'll flip out about it. He and I live in a different state but we started talking in 2014. I've been to see him a few times but the only reason I was able to go is because my parents sent my kid brother with me. But I know they aren't going to pay for him to go with me anymore. I'm planning to go back and see my friend in a few months. But I'm not telling my parents I'm going. When I go see my family in Atlanta I'm leaving there and fly out to see my friend. IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 03:23 PM
My father is the same way both of my parents are. I wish there was something I could do about this. I guess I'll just have to keep lying.
quote:
Originally posted by Electro DGX:
Of course; I was expecting to see some sort of Moon-Pluto contact in your chart. With the Moon representing the Mother, Moon-Pluto hard contacts can indicate a mother who could've been obsessive with protecting her child as she told the child dark stories about the world and become overly-protective of the child. It's possible that she may try to be overly protective of you in ways of instilling fear so that you don't go out into the world and she can "protect" you as is being stated. With your Sun opposite Pluto, your father could've been the same way, yet it's possible that he may have not been as strict about it because of how wide the orb is. Saturn in the 4th as you mentioned is an indicator, since Saturn restricts and being in the 4th restricts your home life in some way (it is in detriment in this house). You also have a wide square between the Moon and Midheaven. Even though it's quite wide, it's possible that it may add onto your parents' protective tendencies and make them want to shield you from the world. Overall though I think Pluto is the biggest benefactor here; considering that Pluto can be obsessive about anything.
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Koniucha
Knowflake Posts: 780
From:
Registered: Jun 2014
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posted July 27, 2016 03:31 PM
Moon sq. Pluto for sure. I have that and my mom was very controlling and still tries to be. She never let me do anything when I was younger. And probably Sun opposite Pluto to represent a controlling father. IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 03:51 PM
I haven't had my Saturn Return yet but I hope this will change once I go through it. I'm 29 years old and they give me a hard time about traveling. So I just lie because I know they will just give me a hard time.
quote:
Originally posted by Koniucha:
Moon sq. Pluto for sure. I have that and my mom was very controlling and still tries to be. She never let me do anything when I was younger. And probably Sun opposite Pluto to represent a controlling father.
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BeholdAstarte
Knowflake Posts: 600
From: astral plane
Registered: Dec 2009
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posted July 27, 2016 04:25 PM
Pluto opposition Sun, square moon, placed in 3rd also signifies early environment to be pluto themed, dominating and controlling. scorpio on 4th house cusp Saturn in the 4th house is also a strict influence and places more importance on discipline than sympathy.. how does Uranus play in the mix for you? IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 04:29 PM
I have Uranus in the 4th house and Venus square Uranus. I also have Sun trine Uranus and Uranus trines my AC.
quote:
Originally posted by BeholdAstarte:
Pluto opposition Sun, square moon, placed in 3rd also signifies early environment to be pluto themed, dominating and controlling. scorpio on 4th house cusp Saturn in the 4th house is also a strict influence and places more importance on discipline than sympathy.. how does Uranus play in the mix for you?
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LaceyLeigh
Knowflake Posts: 925
From:
Registered: Jul 2014
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posted July 27, 2016 04:42 PM
Things will get better once you move out. Their house, their rules, unfortunately. Do you pay rent? It sounds like they still see you as a young adult/child, and not a woman who is almost 30.IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 04:49 PM
They can't really stop me from going if I want to go. They will let me travel to go visit family. That's why I said I'm going to see my friend after I spend time with my family. I don't have a problem with paying rent. But I'm sure they probably won't want me to move out until I get married.
quote:
Originally posted by LaceyLeigh:
Things will get better once you move out. Their house, their rules, unfortunately. Do you pay rent? It sounds like they still see you as a young adult/child, and not a woman who is almost 30.
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SnowCatcher
Knowflake Posts: 212
From:
Registered: Feb 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 06:01 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ChildofVenus:
They can't really stop me from going if I want to go. They will let me travel to go visit family. That's why I said I'm going to see my friend after I spend time with my family. I don't have a problem with paying rent. But I'm sure they probably won't want me to move out until I get married.
My biggest concern is, a person has these difficult moon-pluto aspects, does it affect you karmically if you go against and FORCE yourself out of their life/house/etc. That's my concern more than anything, the repercussions of going against that over protection, what will happen if you lie/leave/break yourself from their grip?
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Aries23Degrees
Knowflake Posts: 3186
From: South Africa
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted July 27, 2016 06:08 PM
quote:
Originally posted by venus2tinkerbell:
Scorpio 4th house maybe?
I was about to say the same thing and my Taurus sister has the Ic in Scorpio. She has always felt my parents controlling. She has had some hectic stand-offs with my father. Pluto and Mars both rule your 4th house and this suggests a need seek to independence (Mars) and autonomy(Pluto) in the areas they rule Uranus in the 4th adds to this need for feedom. There is a need to break away from being confined. Your parents have a fear about safety(Moon/Pluto). Did something occur earlier in life to have them think this way. Perhaps something at age 12/13(when Pluto in 3rd arced to conjunct the Ic and oppose the Mc)? And again at age 19(when Pluto arced to square the Ac/Dc axis)?
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ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 06:16 PM
I don't know no one has mentioned this I was just told that my Saturn Return would be about me needing to break free. And if not during my Saturn Return I'd have another chance during my Second Saturn Return. But by then I'll be in my 50's.
quote:
Originally posted by SnowCatcher:
My biggest concern is, a person has these difficult moon-pluto aspects, does it affect you karmically if you go against and FORCE yourself out of their life/house/etc. That's my concern more than anything, the repercussions of going against that over protection, what will happen if you lie/leave/break yourself from their grip?
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ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 06:20 PM
As far as I can remember I don't think so. My parents have always been protective over me even as a kid I'm also the only child which makes it even worse. I thank them for being protective of me as a child but now that I'm an adult it's too much.
quote:
Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
I was about to say the same thing and my Taurus sister has the Ic in Scorpio.She has always felt my parents controlling. She has had some hectic stand-offs with my father. Pluto and Mars both rule your 4th house and this suggests a need seek to independence (Mars) and autonomy(Pluto) in the areas they rule Uranus in the 4th adds to this need for feedom. There is a need to break away from being confined. Your parents have a fear about safety(Moon/Pluto). Did something occur earlier in life to have them think this way. Perhaps something at age 12/13(when Pluto in 3rd arced to conjunct the Ic and oppose the Mc)? And again at age 19(when Pluto arced to square the Ac/Dc axis)?
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Aries23Degrees
Knowflake Posts: 3186
From: South Africa
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted July 27, 2016 06:46 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ChildofVenus:
As far as I can remember I don't think so. My parents have always been protective over me even as a kid I'm also the only child which makes it even worse. I thank them for being protective of me as a child but now that I'm an adult it's too much.
I hear ya. But it could be from their memory because they are the ones protective of you. Pluto is a hectic planet that rarely goes unnoticed when arcing the angles. So either that or perhaps the time of birth may be slightly off  IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 06:52 PM
I enjoy going to see my friend and spending time with him. Spending time with him makes me happy. But I know if my parents knew about this they wouldn't like it at all. The guy is 13 years older than I am. Spending time with him is like a escape for me. He gave me this wristband that says revealing the champion from within. But I don't think of myself as a champion not at all. IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 27, 2016 07:09 PM
I used my correct birth time I have my birth certificate.
quote:
Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
I hear ya. But it could be from their memory because they are the ones protective of you.Pluto is a hectic planet that rarely goes unnoticed when arcing the angles. So either that or perhaps the time of birth may be slightly off
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ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 29, 2016 05:16 AM
But I also wonder if there would be any repercussions for breaking away? I don't see any other way. IP: Logged |
Sylven
Knowflake Posts: 540
From: Netherlands
Registered: Nov 2014
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posted July 29, 2016 05:46 AM
You can break free peacefully and positively, no? And really showing them the succes story afterwards. I always like to shine a light on the positive sides of things. This will motivate them and will give them trust. If not, it's their path. Like sending them a sweet post card and telling them you love them and that you are feeling so good. Then you are acting pure and loving and have nothing to feel awful about. It's about time you break free!! I truly believe we cannot project our charts on our parents but we do. Projecting is only human until we see what is happening. Then we can start to choose consciously and step out of the matrix. Astrology in fact is also a matrix. We are more than our charts.
The blue print and what is happening therein is something we chose to undo us off or go more deeply into. But, we always have choice in every single moment. Again and again. Then the magic will happen!  IP: Logged |
Lucia23
Knowflake Posts: 386
From:
Registered: Jun 2016
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posted July 29, 2016 08:57 AM
Did your parents grow up in the States?Even if not, they must understand that it's very normal and standard here for kids to move out and into their own home around college age, 18. And that it's very weird and unusual here and 1750s/deeply conservative to expect a 30-year-old to live in her parents' home, whether she's married or not!!!! I know it's getting more common for adults to live with parents in this "boomerang generation", so maybe this issue is a theme for other Sag Saturns. The part you can change is the role you play in this dynamic. Because you ARE almost thirty, not thirteen or fourteen, you can move out on your own and kindly, gently communicate to your parents that it is VERY NORMAL and healthy in this culture for adults in their twenties and thirties to live separately from their parents. I think part of the problem is that you don't see that yourself. So you can't help them through the transition by setting an example, by showing them that you live independently because that's a normal thing to do AND it's what's best for you. You are in some ways very fixed (Taurus/Aqua), and it might come more naturally to your Taurus Sun to do things the way they are done and the way they always have been done--it probably won't feel good to you to have to change things up, it might feel easier if your parents did it for you. But you have all these other elements in your chart that mean you do need to find more independence to be happy. Not in a bad way like rejecting your parents, but in a way that is respectful of your feelings and theirs. IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 880
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted July 29, 2016 11:09 AM
My only concern about moving out is that I won't be able to make it on my own financially. This is really the only thing holding me back. Other than the fact that I would miss my mother. I want to go to one of those colleges where It'll only take me about 10 months to graduate. For massage therapy then I think I'd be making enough money to live on my own. When I told my father I wanted to go to this type of college he told me I shouldn't rush things. That I might be creating a problem for myself. Meaning because I would have to pay the money back from the loan I'll need to take out for college. And I guess part of the reason why I keep wanting to go to California to be with my friend is because I feel free or it's like a escapism for me. He's always telling me how I need to educate myself more etc. He sends me things to read wanting me to have discussions with him. In some ways I feel like he's a positive influence because he pushes me in regards to education. I would really like to move so I could be closer to him. But I don't know it just seems like everything in my life right now is turning into a mess.
quote:
Originally posted by Lucia23:
Did your parents grow up in the States?Even if not, they must understand that it's very normal and standard here for kids to move out and into their own home around college age, 18. And that it's very weird and unusual here and 1750s/deeply conservative to expect a 30-year-old to live in her parents' home, whether she's married or not!!!! I know it's getting more common for adults to live with parents in this "boomerang generation", so maybe this issue is a theme for other Sag Saturns. The part you can change is the role you play in this dynamic. Because you ARE almost thirty, not thirteen or fourteen, you can move out on your own and kindly, gently communicate to your parents that it is VERY NORMAL and healthy in this culture for adults in their twenties and thirties to live separately from their parents. I think part of the problem is that you don't see that yourself. So you can't help them through the transition by setting an example, by showing them that you live independently because that's a normal thing to do AND it's what's best for you. You are in some ways very fixed (Taurus/Aqua), and it might come more naturally to your Taurus Sun to do things the way they are done and the way they always have been done--it probably won't feel good to you to have to change things up, it might feel easier if your parents did it for you. But you have all these other elements in your chart that mean you do need to find more independence to be happy. Not in a bad way like rejecting your parents, but in a way that is respectful of your feelings and theirs.
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Lucia23
Knowflake Posts: 386
From:
Registered: Jun 2016
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posted July 29, 2016 11:35 AM
i misunderstood something you wrote earlier (or in another thread?) and thought that you were employed and could cover rent etc on your own.
I agree that saddling yourself with a bunch of debt is a bad idea!
What were you doing around age 18, "traditional" college age? A couple of years before that age, getting a college scholarship was probably my #3 priority in life (right after art and romance). there are programs that offer generous financial aid to a majority of their students. Also, many programs have hours and schedules that make it possible to work and go to school at the same time. IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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