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Author
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Topic: Cancer - where is it, and what's your relationship with your mother like?
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Lalafortunaea
Knowflake Posts: 683
From:
Registered: Jul 2017
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posted October 29, 2017 04:26 PM
  
What house is your cancer in your chart, and what's your relationship like with your mother?This is all experimental - (and perhaps it is already known?) We know that moon has to do with your relationship with your mother as well, but what about just where your cancer is in your chart? My cancer is in my 3rd house, and my relationship with my mother has always been that she's more like a sibling, or I acted more responsible and/or understanding than her, and would give her a lot of parenting advice (which she disliked, naturally). A friend of mine has Cancer in the 11th, and his mother is more like a friend, but not exactly best friends. Their relationship is a bit detached and she hasn't got a load of maternal feelings in general. Another friend has Cancer in their 7th house, and what I understand of their relationship, is that her mother tries to be closer (almost like emotional incest) to her than she would like, and has serious boundary issues. So, she's distanced herself from her mom, and not that it will manifest like this for all, but is interesting nonetheless. It would depend how it manifests, I suppose, whether positively or negatively. Another friend also has cancer on the dsc, however, it's not so toxic like the first i mentioned, but, he and his mother were very close emotionally and would do just about anything and everything together. There was a lot of intimacy but in the non-violation way. I could go on, but I'd like to hear about your own experiences ~
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Nine
Moderator Posts: 3428
From: The Cusp of Love
Registered: May 2009
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posted October 29, 2017 04:36 PM
In the 10th & 11th houses. Moon in the 3rd. She was like a sibling growing up. Well [me, her, her brothers] all called my grandparents Mom & Dad. Called them uncle, and her by her first name. IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees
Knowflake Posts: 5860
From: South Africa
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted October 29, 2017 04:58 PM
Cancer is on the 4th house cusp/Ic.But I think my relationship with Mom is Mc in Cap. Uranus/Neptune parallel to it. On one hand , it is friendly(Uranus). But on the other hand, not clearly definable(Nep). It is also quite formal -Mc in Cap with Saturn trine Moon/Saturn conj Venus. The 4th/Cancer is my father. My Moon conjuncts the Ic
and I have felt very strong feelings with him. We were not close and I felt starved of love from him. My Sun conjuncts Neptune and forms an inconjuct aspect with Chiron. I have had some serious Daddy issues growing up. I yearned for a father figure(Neptune) and never got one. As the man I had as a father was himself broken(Chiron) and far removed from that role.
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Lalafortunaea
Knowflake Posts: 683
From:
Registered: Jul 2017
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posted October 29, 2017 05:36 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Nine:
In the 10th & 11th houses. Moon in the 3rd. She was like a sibling growing up. Well [me, her, her brothers] all called my grandparents Mom & Dad. Caller them uncle, and her by her first name.
That's quite interesting, even though reversed, still similar influences. While my cancer is in 3rd, my moon is in 11th. I also call her by her first name often.
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hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 9810
From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 29, 2017 05:55 PM
Interesting.... I love were you are going with this one.I have it in the 9th house, she is super religious. I stayed in religion longer than I wanted to make her happy and not disrupt certain components of our bond and connection so it totally fits lol... IP: Logged |
areesquivel
Knowflake Posts: 1006
From: MX
Registered: Feb 2016
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posted October 29, 2017 09:22 PM
Cancer on 9th house and I call myself a chaman's daughter, she's into spiritual stuff, she runs Temazcals here in Mexico which is a pre hispanic spiritual ceremony, she's also catholic.
My Sun is in that house too, I've always seen her like the head of my family and my relationship is good and bad, I have Pisces Moon so I guess I always saw her like here but not here.IP: Logged |
SoulOfABird
Knowflake Posts: 326
From: California
Registered: Sep 2017
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posted October 30, 2017 01:12 AM
Cancer rules my 5th and 6th house. I dont have other placements in Cancer. My mom and I have never been close. I live with her and she's always been in my life, it's just a bit complicated. She didny bond with me as a baby because she was too busy dealing with my dad. An abusive relationship that she was blinded by love for me father. It brought a lot if drama. I didnt like being around my mom so I would want to go with my grandma a lot. I felt more at peace around my grandparents. Once my dad left, when I was about 4 or 5, I had already grown close to my grandma and even called her mom, which people put me down for. But they didn't understand just judged that I grew distant from my mom. Then as I grew up my mom would work on the weekdays and party a lot on the weekends. Since I was close with my grandma I remember sometimes my mom and her would get into fights about me , and sometimes she accused my grandma of being at fault for why I wasnt close with her. That's not why. I didnt like my mom growing up because I couldnt ask her things without her snapping at me and then it would hurt my feelings and embarrass me. I always felt like she was judging me which she would a lot of times. She has always been critical, negative anf judgemental from what I remember. I also think she has some form of bipolar disorder or something. She was never diagnosed but my aunt has. When my mom gets mad, she gets scary. Ive heard her call my grandma a ***** when they got into a fight. Ive seen her explode and yell at her and throw money at her. My mom would go out to night clubs and got crazy. Doing wild things. When she dated a guy , I would always hear her crying on the phone arguing with them and wasnt strong enough to find a better relationship. I just knew growing up I didnt want to be like her because of these reasons. My grandma raised me to be who I am today. Now that Im older I have learned to deal with it. My mom has settled down. I dont hate or despise her. I never have. It's just growing up I didnt like the things she did or her personality traits. I dont hate or resent her. I dont fight with her. Best way to describe the relationship is detached. I am okay with it though. Since I have my grandma and grandpa who have helped me with so much. I am grateful. I just kind of feel bad for my mom. And my sister also. My younger sister has a completely different relationship with our mom. She's glued to her hip. Ironically I have an Aquarius moon in the 12th house
My sister has a Cancer moon in the 5th house Im not sure what my Cancer ruled houses say about this though. ------------------
I appreciate the masterpiece that is you, because your existence alone is art IP: Logged |
SoulOfABird
Knowflake Posts: 326
From: California
Registered: Sep 2017
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posted October 30, 2017 01:15 AM
sorry didnt mean to quote 😆IP: Logged |
charlie
Knowflake Posts: 4608
From:
Registered: Jun 2012
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posted October 30, 2017 04:17 AM
Cancer stellium 11H sq Pluto and Uranus. My mom was an alcoholic throughout my childhood and a mean one at that. I “took care” of her until moved away at the age of 18. She always made me the scapegoat for her own misery until the day I snapped (think it was 20 yrs later) and I literally told her that if she didn’t leave me alone I would kill her :-/ I had had enough of her sh*t at that point! Shortly thereafter she got ill and HAD to quit drinking. She’s been sober for 2 years and doing very well. She’s a Scorpio Sun, Moon, Venus, Mercury sq Leo Pluto. My Cap Moon is also sq Pluto. IP: Logged |
moonlight swan
Knowflake Posts: 111
From: On top of the world
Registered: Jun 2015
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posted October 30, 2017 07:11 AM
Cancer is in 7th house. Moon in 12th.My mother has never been a mother figure to me. Our bond has been more like as if she is a child. She has been mentally sick on/off since I can remember. I have huge mother issues and have from around the age of 16 been searching for mother figures and mentors - and have found some great ones who inspire me and have filled the void. I don't know if this is related too but i suppose cancer in 7th house would make me attracted to people who mother/ or need to be mothered. I have had intense crushes on women 20 or so years older than me. Over the past two years I've slowly begun to realise how my relationship with my mother -or lack of has shaped me! Edit :my mum is a Cancer Sun, my father Cancer Moon IP: Logged |
DualGemV2
Knowflake Posts: 584
From: Toronto, Ontario
Registered: Aug 2016
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posted October 30, 2017 08:37 AM
Cancer, 6th House with Cancer Parents.I don't think she fully understood me or what my needs/requirements are. She's lucky where she is and the type of employment she has, given the level of education she has. The only problem is she thinks I should do the very same and do jobs I don't have the skills for...and cheat my way like her which I don't agree. Karma can hit you back big time and it has happened to her but she doesn't recognize it Her logic works for say a construction worker but not for a doctor or for specialized fields so we get in an argument over that every time. My profession requires you to have a certain level of qualification. I also had a pediatrician until I was 17 and every session the pediatrician would be explaining to her how to be a mother. To be fair I think she tries but she doesn't know any better. Being a Cancer sun, I think she likes the idea of having kids but also fails to reason what the challenges and needs children have. Even before my sister had kids she assumed her grandchildren would just eat and watch TV like her. In reality they actually require more attention then that. She was shocked when she discovered how mentally and physically demanding they are. My Planets
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☉‘ ♊, ☽ ♈, ASC ♑, ☿ ♊, ¡÷ ♉, ¡ö ♋ , ♃ ♒, ♄ ♏, ♅ ♐, ♆ ♑ IP: Logged |
Lalafortunaea
Knowflake Posts: 683
From:
Registered: Jul 2017
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posted October 30, 2017 08:41 AM
quote:
Originally posted by charlie:
Cancer stellium 11H sq Pluto and Uranus. My mom was an alcoholic throughout my childhood and a mean one at that. I “took care” of her until moved away at the age of 18. She always made me the scapegoat for her own misery until the day I snapped (think it was 20 yrs later) and I literally told her that if she didn’t leave me alone I would kill her :-/ I had had enough of her sh*t at that point!
It's awful that she drove you to feel that way. I understand why you did. Sometimes they just can't take a hint, and no matter what, you feel like the only way is to actually threaten them to get it through their head that you can't take them any more. 11th house here again is interesting indeed. IP: Logged |
Lalafortunaea
Knowflake Posts: 683
From:
Registered: Jul 2017
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posted October 30, 2017 08:53 AM
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
Interesting.... I love were you are going with this one.I have it in the 9th house, she is super religious. I stayed in religion longer than I wanted to make her happy and not disrupt certain components of our bond and connection so it totally fits lol...
quote:
Originally posted by areesquivel:
Cancer on 9th house and I call myself a chaman's daughter, she's into spiritual stuff, she runs Temazcals here in Mexico which is a pre hispanic spiritual ceremony, she's also catholic.
My Sun is in that house too, I've always seen her like the head of my family and my relationship is good and bad, I have Pisces Moon so I guess I always saw her like here but not here.
That's very fascinating. You both have 9th house Cancer and have religious/spiritual mothers to some degree. If we're to mention our fathers, which could be Capricorn - mine is in the 9th, and my father is extremely religious and nearly always had his bible on hand. IP: Logged |
colorful butterfly
Knowflake Posts: 2109
From: USA
Registered: May 2015
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posted October 30, 2017 11:40 PM
Cancer sun, and it is in the 10th house along with my venus in Gemini conjunct my MC. My mom was a Gemini with an Aries moon. I loved my momma but she was sick most of my life. Most things were concentrated around her due to her illness . I always wondered what was wrong with her and why couldn't she be normal but then as I got older and learned about her condition, she was really a good mom to have fought to be the mom that she was. IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees
Knowflake Posts: 5860
From: South Africa
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted October 31, 2017 01:19 AM
So sorry to hear that colourfulbutterfly . My Mom was sick for one year and we were so anxious.Moon in Aries is a fighter. My Mom has Moon/Neptune opp. And she depended a lot on spritual stuff at that time What aspects are there to your Mom's Aries moon? IP: Logged |
florence
Knowflake Posts: 1537
From:
Registered: Jun 2012
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posted October 31, 2017 10:55 AM
Kind of fits for me. Cancer in 8th house. Just earlier I was thinking about how my mum used to go through my phone .. When I was an adult. She's taken pleasure in my distress, treated me as a rival in many ways, been controlling. She has 4 sisters and they had to fight for affection from their own parents who tended not to give it much so it's like at times she's transferred that onto meWe are a lot, lot better now. We've both made progress in our acceptance and communication. But trust .. It's something I've let go of needing for that to be possible. I've also got Jupiter (conjunct nemesis) in cancer opp sag moon. My mums a teacher and that was the nature of any bond felt, growing up. I only felt any love whilst I was learning (which in some ways was good because I'm very into learning .. Anything to do with 8th house stuff or approach I.e obsessive, too). IP: Logged |
colorful butterfly
Knowflake Posts: 2109
From: USA
Registered: May 2015
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posted November 01, 2017 05:38 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
So sorry to hear that colourfulbutterfly . My Mom was sick for one year and we were so anxious.Moon in Aries is a fighter. My Mom has Moon/Neptune opp. And she depended a lot on spritual stuff at that time What aspects are there to your Mom's Aries moon?
I am not sure but she was mentally ill. I can give you her birth day but I am not sure what time of day or even where she was born at although I have an idea. May 28 1961 Winston Salem NC . IP: Logged |
colorful butterfly
Knowflake Posts: 2109
From: USA
Registered: May 2015
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posted November 01, 2017 05:44 AM
quote:
Originally posted by moonlight swan:
Cancer is in 7th house. Moon in 12th.My mother has never been a mother figure to me. Our bond has been more like as if she is a child. She has been mentally sick on/off since I can remember. I have huge mother issues and have from around the age of 16 been searching for mother figures and mentors - and have found some great ones who inspire me and have filled the void. I don't know if this is related too but i suppose cancer in 7th house would make me attracted to people who mother/ or need to be mothered. I have had intense crushes on women 20 or so years older than me. Over the past two years I've slowly begun to realise how my relationship with my mother -or lack of has shaped me! Edit :my mum is a Cancer Sun, my father Cancer Moon
Hmmm... wow , I have a Libra moon and think the reason for this is because I learned because my mom was sick and things revolved around her mostly to put my own emotional needs to the side . Just curious because of your mother being mentally ill, although I never sought out mother figures. I think people just naturally mother me or were there. IP: Logged |
colorful butterfly
Knowflake Posts: 2109
From: USA
Registered: May 2015
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posted November 01, 2017 05:48 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Lalafortunaea:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by charlie:
[b]Cancer stellium 11H sq Pluto and Uranus. My mom was an alcoholic throughout my childhood and a mean one at that. I “took care” of her until moved away at the age of 18. She always made me the scapegoat for her own misery until the day I snapped (think it was 20 yrs later) and I literally told her that if she didn’t leave me alone I would kill her :-/ I had had enough of her sh*t at that point!
It's awful that she drove you to feel that way. I understand why you did. Sometimes they just can't take a hint, and no matter what, you feel like the only way is to actually threaten them to get it through their head that you can't take them any more. 11th house here again is interesting indeed.[/B][/QUOTE] Oh god, sorry to hear that!!!! IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees
Knowflake Posts: 5860
From: South Africa
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted November 01, 2017 07:23 AM
@colorfulbutterfly.Ehm...with the info given, your Mom is Gemini Sun/Scorpio Moon. Moon conjunct Neptune
Mars contra-parallel Jupiter
Sun parallel Pluto. Nevertheless, Sun/Pluto is a survivor aspect. My Mom has the square. And she fought hard to stay alive when leaving was a comfortable alternative.
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etherealsaturn
Knowflake Posts: 484
From: New York, USA
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted November 01, 2017 02:11 PM
Cancer is 4th house cusp sign.I've had a good relationship with my mother all my life. We were very close when I was younger. By the time I was a teenager, I realized there was a lot of growing up I had to do on my own, and she was more of a friend than a parental figure. Not that she was a bad mom. I have Chiron in Leo, but in the 4th house as well. I have found things out about my mom that have made me not entirely trust her and lack faith in her judgment. IP: Logged |
lily0409
Knowflake Posts: 52
From:
Registered: Sep 2017
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posted July 30, 2018 12:40 AM
Cancer is in 11th house . My Grandmother was like my Mother . I experienced and experiencing a very challenging relationship with my Mother. When my Mother was younger she had immensely beautiful looks and when I was rarely walking with her many men were stopping and kept looking at her . She used to spend lots of time hairstyling , make up and wearing beautiful clothes , shoes and bags and i feel she gave me and my sister to our Grandmother to take care of us full time . She was more like one of friends and not best friend . I found myself a few times deeply shocked finding her instead of cooperating being more like competitive . She was and is like a friend who comes when they need more money . This is how I felt for years . She was detached and I felt she had no maternal instinct in her . In her later years she started showing more affections and expressing her love but makes me feel very uncomfortable . Lately suddenly she started texting daily and I do not like it . It’s like she touches my deep wounds of her not being there for me as my Mother. Venus conjuncti Moon in Cancer 11th house
Venus 25 Cancer59’1”
Moon 26Can58’14” Asteroid Kallisto(204) conjunct Moon
Asteroid Kallisto (25 Can48'20") conjunct Venus IP: Logged |
mamawolf
Knowflake Posts: 424
From: the universe
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted July 30, 2018 02:06 AM
Cancer in 3rd house and Moon in 10thMy mother lives in the country I was born in and I didn't grow up with her. According to my dad, her parents weren't happy about the pregnancy for whatever reason so I was raised by my dad's sister until I was 4 and moved to the states to live with him. I met her once when I was 16 and went back to visit family. She has other children and is married.I never talked about her growing up nor did my friends ask, I think because they knew it was complicated. Now because of my Saturn Return, I've been questioning it and dealing with the subconscious pain of mother figures..with a therapist of course. IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees
Knowflake Posts: 5860
From: South Africa
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted July 30, 2018 08:20 AM
quote:
Originally posted by mamawolf:
Cancer in 3rd house and Moon in 10thMy mother lives in the country I was born in and I didn't grow up with her. According to my dad, her parents weren't happy about the pregnancy for whatever reason so I was raised by my dad's sister until I was 4 and moved to the states to live with him. I met her once when I was 16 and went back to visit family. She has other children and is married.I never talked about her growing up nor did my friends ask, I think because they knew it was complicated. Now because of my Saturn Return, I've been questioning it and dealing with the subconscious pain of mother figures..with a therapist of course.
Moon in 10th makes sense. The "Mom" being emotionally unreliable or her role not being consistent Where is the Moon placed? IP: Logged |
Somna7H
Knowflake Posts: 342
From: East India Company
Registered: Apr 2018
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posted July 30, 2018 08:26 AM
Unsupportive, self centered, selfish, abusive mother.Cancer 3rd House.
NN, Mercury and Sun in Cancer. ------------------
My Chart: http://imgur.com/m0qQlLl IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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