posted April 09, 2019 08:07 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
authenticity of self is more than actions, and more than defining yourself by those actions

people are complex and everyone does stupid **** or reacts or is inactive in ways that aren't all there is to them, is it inauthentic? no, it's just that people aren't one dimensional and being authentic isn't as black and white as what you do at any single moment in your life

judging yourself harshly for what you do and don't do is just in your nature, and self reflection is great and all but harsh judgement isn't necessarily fair

if the sum of things becomes a negative pattern then of course there are issues, but people aren't just who they are at bad times they're also the person that comes through it or doesn't and even then there's so much more

when i make music and write lyrics they're part of me, but when i get criticism i see it as a reason to dig deeper and pull more up and improve if i feel like their criticism makes sense

it isn't an attack, just a perspective and nothing personal because art doesn't mean what it does to me the moment it's viewed by someone else it becomes what they see

it's still part of me, but it has its own life as well, that's what creating is giving life to something with part of yourself

and just because something is part of me doesn't mean it's perfect and if i respect someone's opinions then when they give them to me i'm grateful for them because with them i can better myself and my art not just exist in a vacuum or echochamber

with actions though at what point are they the sum of you? if you change your actions are you suddenly a different person? no, you're still you, maybe you've grown or changed but that part of you that's intrinsically always you is still there

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I think you have a better rational grasp of this than I. It could be that Saturn aspects Moon/Mercury and Venus too and with the Sun/Pluto aspect there is more to deal with etc.

I will say for instance "I will tell the truth about me".That being the goal i.e "Sun".And so with added Pluto in aspect to Sun, the need to tell the truth about me will be there in both "good" company and "hostile".

Ofcourse I use discernment to gauge when the "truth" should be told or delayed.But it will out. Sometimes even when the company "turns" on me etc.

Now say for instance I am required to conceal or not tell the truth about me. Say for instance a mad man was to hold me and others hostage and I am "expected" to lie to save others. I will.

But say if I am expected to lie to save myself. Then I will still not lie because I will later hold myself accountable for that lie.

I will wrestle with the lie I told until it starts to eat me And eventually it will "out". I will want to tell the truth.

That's what I mean by being "all in".There is no half measure and/or "maybe".If i do that and connect with you on the basis of pretense and censorship, our relationship/friendship will not last.

I want to tell all of me and let it out.Friendships or relationships built on other foundations to me are faulty.And that could also be why relationships for me and those who have Sun/Pluto interacting with the 7th are tough?

posted April 09, 2019 08:34 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by StubbornVirgo:
I have several of these aspects, including Sun sextile Pluto, Moon sextile Jupiter, Mercury trine Uranus and Venus trine Neptune.

With Sun sextile Pluto, I do identify heavily with my career. And yes, I can get lost in and identify with one area of interest in my job. It's fairly easy for me to let go of control over an area or project, though. I more or less have the attitude of, "Oh, you really want this? Okay, more power to you." I only give power over with my reactions, IMO...if I get upset or make a fuss over giving up control of something, then the other person REALLY knows how much it gets to me. If I'm cool and calm, then I still maintain control over the situation.

I encountered the negative aspects of Moon-Jupiter when I was younger. My Moon is Gemini and my Jupiter is in Leo. Those extreme highs and lows were difficult to navigate. Now that I'm older, I feel like my Saturn and Pluto aspects steer me towards a more somber, quiet existence. I still give generously, though I don't make a big deal about it. I like to give anonymously wherever possible.

I can easily switch back and forth between topics in my mind with Mercury in Uranus, but not during a conversation. My mind can be a bit slow with conversation/interaction in person. My Mercury is retrograde in my natal chart, so that may play a part.

I am very gullible and naive with relationships. I've actually thought before that guys were playing a joke on me when expressing interest, kind of a "too good to be true" type of feeling. I have looked over major character flaws before *just because* things felt fated. I've also found with this aspect, I'm more willing to make excuses for a person I love. I've been blind to being cheated on in the past, too.

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I like what you said there about the Sun/Pluto aspect. Except the only difference between you and I is that I don't give up control easily over the project or area of interest.

At work, I used to really hate going on leave as that would mean "opening my work up" to another so that they can take over for the duration that I am not there.

posted April 09, 2019 01:28 PM            

could be my moon-uranus-mercury- venus/ascendant kite that does it, uranus adding that level of detachment

my pluto is first house sextiling both my sun and neptune, and my sun is aspected by saturn (square) and neptune (trine) which might add to it

for me how much i tell is dependent on the other person or the situation, for instance i hid (and it's still not all out in the open, and was never told to anyone by me) the extent of my drug use from a lot of people and so on, and other details of my life that aren't particularly anything to announce to anyone

i tend to keep a lot of people at a controlled distance but i am always myself, it's just in my nature to not share everything or to selectively share that is me being authentic as far as i'm concerned

for however open i seem there's still parts of me that are closed off always though my fiancee knows nearly everything there is to know about me

i don't see this as dishonest or inauthentic however, because the more i like or care about someone the deeper i let them in and that makes that particular relationship more valuable

i speak matter of factly about a good deal of **** here because it's of no consequence, and i don't generally lie outright in person but i frame the truth in jokes for example if someone were to ask me what i was doing on a particular night while i was a junkie i'd say "a few bags of heroin and then i'm going to a museum with (insert people here)" and we'd laugh about it but then really i would go and do exactly that all a matter of tone and ****

if i don't do that i just don't say anything at all instead, typically it's a combination of the two, but again only to certain people

if i need to lie or hide something for some reason i will, and i'm good at it though it isn't something i care for

there are situations that i'm very dishonest in (unless someone catches me off guard and it's a question like "how does this look on me?" that ***** my **** up i'm not good at that) for example if someone is flirting with me or touchy and i'm not at all interested but i can tell they really are and it's only just going to be sex i'll play along and **** around even if i don't really feel like it out of habit

because i respond to what they put out and detach from myself easily, and it's led to situations that have been awkward for me where i'll hear i made someone feel special and **** like that meanwhile it really meant nothing to me it was only ever their own energy reflected back at them

not exactly something i'm proud of, but i tend to shut off in situations like that because i'm not good at turning people down or setting boundaries etc so yeah that's been a thing

i won't tell them about it, and it doesn't eat at me though

i would lie to save someone else just as easily as i would to save myself and feel equally fine in both situations and i find it kind of amusing and endearing that it would bother you so deeply

the way i look has affected things for me in a lot of ways, i look younger than i am and there's an innocent quality apparently so people are generally shocked when they learn about my life

sometimes other people make me feel like i must have a portrait of me somewhere that's all kinds of ****** up or some **** lol i'm not a murderer or a rapist or some **** so as far as i'm concerned decent enough but i've done my fair share of **** you know?

if i feel strongly about something i stick to my principles regardless of consequences and i don't hold back to please other people though

i feel the way you do about relationships being faulty without all of that depth and such but i don't feel the desire to have friendships that are particularly deep with most people and it's only when i feel a deep connection and pull that everything comes to the surface

i think if you can't let it all out with someone and vice versa depths and ****** up **** and all then there's really no point, so you and i are very much alike in that regard

posted April 09, 2019 04:09 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
@Aries23Degrees

could be my moon-uranus-mercury- venus/ascendant kite that does it, uranus adding that level of detachment

my pluto is first house sextiling both my sun and neptune, and my sun is aspected by saturn (square) and neptune (trine) which might add to it

for me how much i tell is dependent on the other person or the situation, for instance i hid (and it's still not all out in the open, and was never told to anyone by me) the extent of my drug use from a lot of people and so on, and other details of my life that aren't particularly anything to announce to anyone

i tend to keep a lot of people at a controlled distance but i am always myself, it's just in my nature to not share everything or to selectively share that is me being authentic as far as i'm concerned

for however open i seem there's still parts of me that are closed off always though my fiancee knows nearly everything there is to know about me

i don't see this as dishonest or inauthentic however, because the more i like or care about someone the deeper i let them in and that makes that particular relationship more valuable

i speak matter of factly about a good deal of **** here because it's of no consequence, and i don't generally lie outright in person but i frame the truth in jokes for example if someone were to ask me what i was doing on a particular night while i was a junkie i'd say "a few bags of heroin and then i'm going to a museum with (insert people here)" and we'd laugh about it but then really i would go and do exactly that all a matter of tone and ****

if i don't do that i just don't say anything at all instead, typically it's a combination of the two, but again only to certain people

if i need to lie or hide something for some reason i will, and i'm good at it though it isn't something i care for

there are situations that i'm very dishonest in (unless someone catches me off guard and it's a question like "how does this look on me?" that ***** my **** up i'm not good at that) for example if someone is flirting with me or touchy and i'm not at all interested but i can tell they really are and it's only just going to be sex i'll play along and **** around even if i don't really feel like it out of habit

because i respond to what they put out and detach from myself easily, and it's led to situations that have been awkward for me where i'll hear i made someone feel special and **** like that meanwhile it really meant nothing to me it was only ever their own energy reflected back at them

not exactly something i'm proud of, but i tend to shut off in situations like that because i'm not good at turning people down or setting boundaries etc so yeah that's been a thing

i won't tell them about it, and it doesn't eat at me though

i would lie to save someone else just as easily as i would to save myself and feel equally fine in both situations and i find it kind of amusing and endearing that it would bother you so deeply

the way i look has affected things for me in a lot of ways, i look younger than i am and there's an innocent quality apparently so people are generally shocked when they learn about my life

sometimes other people make me feel like i must have a portrait of me somewhere that's all kinds of ****** up or some **** lol i'm not a murderer or a rapist or some **** so as far as i'm concerned decent enough but i've done my fair share of **** you know?

if i feel strongly about something i stick to my principles regardless of consequences and i don't hold back to please other people though

i feel the way you do about relationships being faulty without all of that depth and such but i don't feel the desire to have friendships that are particularly deep with most people and it's only when i feel a deep connection and pull that everything comes to the surface

i think if you can't let it all out with someone and vice versa depths and ****** up **** and all then there's really no point, so you and i are very much alike in that regard

but for me that's only a deep romantic connection where that comes out

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I hear what you are saying. Some parts of what you wrote are quite cavalier, then they get raw and then finally sensitive. Its a weird combo indeed.

I feel like Neptune/Pluto are looking to merge with something much greater and "communal" than individual personal love per se.

I see Uranus as the first "breaking" point for personal love and then Neptune and Pluto being more "universal" & "all encompassing" in essence.

So with your Neptune in the mix of Moon-Venus, there is an impersonal quality I detect from people with this aspect. The first introduction being Jupiter than its exaggerated further by Neptune.

So often, Pisces Venus or Venus-Neptune seek to transcend the boundaries of known "love". And this can lead to them not being sure as to whom they love and why they love that person(at any given time).

Perhaps the word "naive" is harsh? But there is a tendency of having rose coloured glasses and not being able to see Alex/Aisha for Alex/Aisha. But seeing them as " embodiments of source energy deserving to be loved and love" etc.

This matters not if Alex/Aisha are killers or philanthropists. Whether they be homeless or housebound.Neptune tends to want to only see the "divine" nature of their being and is thus in many ways indiscriminant.

Now add to this combo the Uranus electricity which removes formed prejudicial opinions or perceptions of people.And one feels like they could relate to ALL people from ALL walks of life without end. But still not be able to pick out their "favourites". Thats how Uranus remains detached but "friendly".

posted April 09, 2019 04:22 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
I hear what you are saying. Some parts of what you wrote are quite cavalier, then they get raw and then finally sensitive. Its a weird combo indeed.

I feel like Neptune/Pluto are looking to merge with something much greater and "communal" than individual personal love per se.

I see Uranus as the first "breaking" point for personal love and then Neptune and Pluto being more "universal" & "all encompassing" in essence.

So with your Neptune in the mix of Moon-Venus, there is an impersonal quality I detect from people with this aspect. The first introduction being Jupiter than its exaggerated further by Neptune.

So often, Pisces Venus or Venus-Neptune seek to transcend the boundaries of known "love". And this can lead to them not being sure as to whom they love and why they love that person(at any given time).

Perhaps the word "naive" is harsh? But there is a tendency of having rose coloured glasses and not being able to see Alex/Aisha for Alex/Aisha. But seeing them as " embodiments of source energy deserving to be loved and love" etc.

This matters not if Alex/Aisha are killers or philanthropists. Whether they be homeless or housebound.Neptune tends to want to only see the "divine" nature of their being and is thus in many ways indiscriminant.

Now add to this combo the Uranus electricity which removes formed prejudicial opinions or perceptions of people.And one feels like they could relate to ALL people from ALL walks of life without end. But still not be able to pick out their "favourites". Thats how Uranus remains detached but "friendly".

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neptune doesn't touch my venus or moon actually, it's my sun that's trine it though venus is conjunct my ascendant from the 12th

i'll give a proper response in a second doing something just wanted to clear that up before i elaborated

edit:

i can definitely feel a strange blend of things that don't always seem to mesh with each other to other people, but they make sense to me whether or not i can explain them

when i love people it's because i feel a connection to them, regardless of anything else, there isn't any set reason why and i can't say what exactly it is i like about someone typically

not even appearance wise, same with disliking someone

i can say i wouldnt care about that kind of **** though for friends or whatever which is why i've met so many odd ****** up people lol people can tell me anything pretty much and i don't particularly care or see it as a big deal and i wouldnt be bothered by it if someone i cared about did ****** up **** that didn't affect me

as messed up as i'm aware that sounds it's true all the same

i can relate to most people on some level, everyone being human and connected and all that, but there's plenty i can't relate to though even when i can't people tell me i understand them better than anyone

i think it might just be something about me that makes them feel that way though

probably sun/neptune

posted April 10, 2019 12:17 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
neptune doesn't touch my venus or moon actually, it's my sun that's trine it though venus is conjunct my ascendant from the 12th

i'll give a proper response in a second doing something just wanted to clear that up before i elaborated

edit:

i can definitely feel a strange blend of things that don't always seem to mesh with each other to other people, but they make sense to me whether or not i can explain them

when i love people it's because i feel a connection to them, regardless of anything else, there isn't any set reason why and i can't say what exactly it is i like about someone typically

not even appearance wise, same with disliking someone

i can say i wouldnt care about that kind of **** though for friends or whatever which is why i've met so many odd ****** up people lol people can tell me anything pretty much and i don't particularly care or see it as a big deal and i wouldnt be bothered by it if someone i cared about did ****** up **** that didn't affect me

as messed up as i'm aware that sounds it's true all the same

i can relate to most people on some level, everyone being human and connected and all that, but there's plenty i can't relate to though even when i can't people tell me i understand them better than anyone

i think it might just be something about me that makes them feel that way though

probably sun/neptune

i definitely don't seem to feel the sun-pluto the way you do though, you seem more intense to me in a lot of ways

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Your writing style is kinda harsh Dumuzi hey I know you mentioned that you can be pretty "matter of fact" .And I picked that up quickly from the responses with your responses to other people on here.

Interestingly your Mc is ruled by the Moon. And the Cancer Midheaven is the image you want to live up to or aspire to i.e protective of those who are weak, carer of those who can't care for themselves, the matriarch defender and protector of women/children/babies and other disadvantaged groups of people.

I think it could be because Moon in Aries rules the midheaven(the persona we have online) AND aspects the Mc axis by square. And thus thos gives you a more "rugged" and "edgy" finish.

You still believe in protecting the weak and fighting the good fight to defend those who can't etc. But you also believe in the self empowerment of the same people you defend. And for them to stop being "victims" and take control of their lives(Aries Moon rules the Mc)

The additional square to the Moon(ruler of Midheaven) received from Mars in Cap emphasizes this: You applaud people who pull themselves off the ground from their bootstraps instead of "waiting" to be "saved" etc. People who are determined to better their lives(Mars in Cap)

But in the same breath, there is sweetness inferred from your posts. As your responses may be cavalier , "matter of fact" and even straightforward. But there is no malice. Just candour.

I think the added Venus in Libra on the angles has people become positively predisposed to you. In that they experience you as a "nasty kind of sweet" or "being cruel to be kind".

Venus in 1st in Libra takes on the martial nature of Venus(by house). So its assertive charm or spicy charisma etc.

My placement is Mars in Libra conjunct Dsc. I tend to be attracted to people who play hard to get.And the people have good looks AND sharp intelligence.

posted April 10, 2019 03:07 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Oh yes. I also wanted to add that Moon in Aries conjunct Dsc is tricky. Being "comfortable" with aggression or marrying into a domestic environment that is far from stable.

Another possibility: being single or attracted to someone who is independent/ self sufficient emotionally and will never be clingy or needy.

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well i'm with a venus in scorpio conjunct pluto/scorpio mercury with an aries moon so there's that lol have been since i was a teenager, and i haven't been single for a significant amount of time since i was a teenager

the first one is true though she is independent in some ways as well, she definitely doesn't need me in order to take care of herself which i appreciate

she has her own goals and vision and desires that she'd have even if i wasn't in the picture and i like that in a person i don't like people to just be reflections of who they think i want or weak to a point where they can't stand on their own

strong personalities are better for me even though there can be added friction because of it

i can be harsh yeah, that's true lol unintentionally sometimes me and very sensitive people can have some issues

i don't really have an image i feel the need or desire to aspire to, i figure people are going to view me how they view me and i'm not particularly concerned about it because it's impossible to please everyone anyway

i'll help people if i can and they need it, but ultimately i do think it's on them to do the work themselves yeah you can only give people the tools to do something and guidelines the rest is about what they do with it

any kind of real healing needs to come from within a person ultimately because situations aren't the sole cause of issues if a person is internally broken

if that's the case they can have everything they could ever want handed to them and they'll still feel like **** because there's a void they can't fill with external ****

as far as life path goes i don't particularly see myself as a matriarchal (i laughed at this btw mostly because i've been asked if i wanted to be a woman before lol) defender of anyone

i actually have zero direction (hard to when a good chunk of your life has been reduced to whether or not your health issues are going to **** you on any given day whenever they feel like it, and before that i was just straight up irresponsible) other than following this esoteric **** that keeps turning up that's pushed me to the point i'm at currently and has come with learning a bunch of healing **** among other things, but there's a nagging focus on that and it's something i have no choice in really

it's just sort of how my life has turned out, fate i guess, i dug deep into the occult because my life made it impossible ignore and now i'm just sort of near directionless waiting to see what happens

i'm not malicious no, people have enough pain as it is so it's pretty needless to be that way

i did get lucky with the venus thing though, i'm pretty sure half the reason people like me generally is that they want to ****

you want it all then huh? i appreciate that my fiancee is intelligent and that i find her extremely attractive, but i hooked up with a dumb but cute guy for a while and this chick i was with i wasn't physically attracted to but i found her interesting etc i think that's more it for me really when it comes to actually liking someone aside from just sex they need to intrigue me + a connection and everything else is just a bonus

i see it like i just got lucky that my fiancee is also pretty and smart and talented etc and i'm not being bias i'm far from the only guy who thinks that

there's just an undefinable quality that makes some people feel a certain way

i'm actually surprised your mars is in libra, you seem more driven than me based on things i've seen you say and just the way you come off generally

posted April 11, 2019 09:05 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
It could be that you are picking up on my Saturn ruled Mc in Cap

Mercury is conjunct the Mc and squares Mars.

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mercury in cap then too? what else is there? i might just notice the cap though yeah, that'll do it

i think neptune hitting both my earth signs really ***** with that sort of thing for me

posted April 11, 2019 11:12 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
plutonians can be naive, they have blind spots and can be too sure of themselves it also depends on their level of self destructiveness on any given day too

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Yes I know one three very naive plutonians, my brothers lol. One is though only plutonian by scorp/pluto rising and thats not as strong pluto energy then for ex 8th house personals or sun-venus pluto etc. The biggest problem is him not knowing how gulliable and naive he is! Thats the worse kind of naive! Not knowing ones weakness. He believes he is super smart, but he is gulliable..

For me as plutonian, I'm suspicious until I get to know someone and opposite to naive, what I know of!

But yes I won't claim I have been a razor sharp person my whole life or something like that, of course when I think of it I have been naive as younger haha. Because I as young always thought people was kind and non-cheating etc by default. It took some bad experiences with decieving and lying people and friends before I understood how wrong I was lol

posted April 11, 2019 11:48 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
mercury in cap then too? what else is there? i might just notice the cap though yeah, that'll do it

i think neptune hitting both my earth signs really ***** with that sort of thing for me

i don't have that same cap drive i'm always reading about

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Hmmmm....its interesting. I think it could be that Venus in Libra in the 1st house. Are you motivated more by pleasure?

My ex has Venus/Mars square with Cap Moon and Saturn in Libra(exalted).Gorgeous guy.But no real sense of direction or ambition.His energy goes towards pleasure seeking

My Dad has Venus/Mars conjunct with Pluto conjunction. His only real motivation was chasing skirts. Very little else did he "achieve". This despite Moon in Cap conjunct Saturn.

posted April 11, 2019 02:06 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Melinn:
Yes I know one three very naive plutonians, my brothers lol. One is though only plutonian by scorp/pluto rising and thats not as strong pluto energy then for ex 8th house personals or sun-venus pluto etc. The biggest problem is him not knowing how gulliable and naive he is! Thats the worse kind of naive! Not knowing ones weakness. He believes he is super smart, but he is gulliable..

For me as plutonian, I'm suspicious until I get to know someone and opposite to naive, what I know of!

But yes I won't claim I have been a razor sharp person my whole life or something like that, of course when I think of it I have been naive as younger haha. Because I as young always thought people was kind and non-cheating etc by default. It took some bad experiences with decieving and lying people and friends before I understood how wrong I was lol

But I would not say plutonians are naive by default, which is what one could say for ex neptunians etc. And plutonians have their extra carefullness that can either make them or break them..

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i think that's the thing with plutonians though, they get over confident about their assessments of people because they're usually good

so when they're right 8 out of 10 times they assume they're right every time and that's where they can be naive

i've also noticed with pluto there can be that desire for deep connections that can lead to being naive too, they can be very giving and sincere and so when they do get blindsided it's hard

my fiancee can be like that

i could see why cancer venus would come out through actions, especially 6th house, because there's that level of nurturing which isn't necessarily emotional when it comes to words sometimes nurturing is actions so it touching his mars is probably what does it

i don't know about the other guy, but having a libra venus i can honestly say i'm completely comfortable not being liked as long as i don't have to deal with the other person's issues at great lengths because then i find that annoying

otherwise i expect x amount of people will dislike me and i'm cool with that, when i flirt and am just civil to keep things smooth it's not really about being liked it's more that it's easier to deal with people that way and it's just completely unconscious (also i'm apathetic about a lot so i prefer what's easier because i don't generally care so why make things hard?)

the way i look has affected the way i get treated and in turn that's affected the way i interact with other people

would this happen to be the leo whose chart is similar to mine? lol

@Aries23Degrees

i'm extremely motivated by pleasure, i'll chase down something potentially pleasurable with complete and total disregard for nearly everything and there aren't obstacles that deter me from it generally

i've ****** myself over on a lot of occasions chasing pleasure over doing anything intelligent or substantial

i can be equally motivated if i'm doing something for someone i care about though

if i don't enjoy something at all i need to be doing it for someone else, i have no ability to self motivate if something isn't enjoyable

it's a real problem that's done a lot of harm in all honesty

me even being alive to type that is pretty impressive all things considered with how many drugs i've done (and i don't mean just that i've done a lot over my life time i mean i can vaguely remember nights where i've taken heroin, muscle relaxers, coke, xanax, oxys, phenibut, and smoked weed and drank all at once; i'm not a big guy so i'd have people watch me and just ask me how i wasn't dead or if i was sure i was going to live through the night) and i've been lucky that some of the dumber decisions i've made regarding sex have turned out alright too etc and so on

posted April 12, 2019 04:00 AM            

Then I suspect my father could have Venus on the angles with Leo probably rising(Mars,Venus,Pluto would be prominent). Because like you, he is very motivated by pleasure.

He will not do anything that doesn't bring some kind of enjoyable experience for him. And add to that, Libra is his NN sign.

You on the other hand have Venus conjunct SN in Libra.Could it be that this is your "fall back" destructive pattern and your Moon conjunct NN in Aries is calling you to balance that out with more clarity,assertiveness and "vigor" in this life?

I think your friendships and/or your mate can help you or provide the inspiration through your interaction with them(Moon/Nn in 7th).Especially when they are closely aligned to the qualities of Aries and the 7th.

I would definitely look at Venus conjunct 1st from the 12th as contributing to your experience with drugs or "feeling pacifiers" etc. the 12th is all about that.

The ruler of the 1st house mixed into the 12th makes escapism, lacking energy, lacking clear direction etc. as much a part of your self sabotage as seeking pleasure. As both are on the cusp of the Asc personality.

Its interesting that you say that you are motivated to do things for those you care about. Again the manifestation of Moon ruling Mc in Cancer(care) in the sign of "action"(Aries). So perhaps your Moon conjunct NN in Aries does call you to action and perhaps even some ambition?

It could be that you feel that you act for those you care abou( 7th), but these actions taken are indirectly for you too as they benefit your sense of emotional fulfillment(Moon).

So I wonder if you have thought of having kids?Or what kind of parent you think you would make? As I think a more "take charge" attitude would flourish from that as your need to protect what you care for would be heightened.

I find Libra placememt's power is in "seduction" or knowing how to "persuade" others with their beauty/charm or attentiveness to them etc. So as to have the others "bend" to their will( more so than others believe Libra is bending to theirs). Its a very subtle and obscure game that only Aqua/Gemini and Virgo catch on to.

So look at how your Mars gets activated in its pleasure seeking tendencies. It is clear that you can go to extremes or be very "thorough". That's dilligent Cap Mars at work(not necessarily the "best" use of this energy at times)

Mars is like a sharp knife. It matters not if you use it to cut lamb or cut limbs, it has little "moral" or "equity" outlook(unless in Libra/Sag/Pisces). So when it cuts, it cuts(for good or ill).

posted April 12, 2019 03:48 PM            

that would make sense for him then, just based on my own experiences with prominent placements like that though in my case with the right incentive i'll do things that i hate and find grating

my fiancee's north node is in aries on my descendant/moon/north node; her moon is aries too (but it's 2 degrees or something like that), and i've definitely learned a lot through my relationship with her, **** i wouldn't have learned otherwise and she makes me want to be a better person for her

she's why i quit heroin, she's why i've done a lot of things that are better for me that i wouldn't have just done on my own if i was all i had to worry about

self destruction is definitely my fall back mode especially in the name of drowning in pleasure, definitely not my best quality but it's been true for most of my life really (if we're going to add past lives to the context well...god damn lol, but that's a long story) you're definitely on point about me with all that

with other people well...if me doing what i want harms them and me doing **** i don't want helps them then if i care obviously the only choice to make is to put myself aside

i'll drag myself through a lot when i care about someone else and me doing so benefits them even if it's **** i hate like having to be responsible and exist in a state that isn't plastered in the woods (i'm a big fan of getting **** faced with nature)

my fiancee and i have talked about kids on and off for a long time (most of the time we've been together) but i mean obviously while drugs were such a big thing that wasn't going to happen

aside from that there's a lot of anxiety on my part and hers because we both went through a lot of **** as children and i know for me i've always that fear that having to be responsible for a kid would make me just withdraw and run away

it's not that i think i'd be a bad parent if i could be present, i know kids like me i'm good with my niece my fiancee and i agree on a lot of really major **** etc it's that being present part that scares the **** out of me and the being responsible when i'm the kind of person who would seriously drop out of society live off grid and do drugs in the middle of nowhere never interacting with anyone i wasn't having sex or doing drugs with or animals and plants until i died if given the opportunity

i know that about myself and it's hard to imagine not being a total piece of **** instead of a parent as a result especially given my life and like i said my childhood was such **** that i can't quite wrap my head around raising a child since i don't feel like i learned a whole lot other than **** to not do from my parents

like me she's really torn though for her it went from fear to not being sure about how that would affect her focusing on her career and goals with that

so it's always this thought for some future where we're together enough for it

you're right about the libra stuff, i think a lot of people feel like they're getting a lot out of libra because of the "people pleasing" image when the reality is you give people a little of the right things and your life is easier for it

win/win, but there's always a win on both sides, and it's not this emotional "i need everyone to like me" kind of deal it's this more calculated "when people like me i don't have to deal with dumb **** " kind of thing if that makes sense

looks definitely go a long way too, i know sometimes i'm only getting by because i can smile and tell a joke and that person who finds me attractive is going to overlook just how bad i ****** up or all the **** i didn't do because then i'm just endearing and it's easier for other people to forgive that kind of ****

get to know me though and then you know i'm an ******* and that sort of **** doesn't work lol but yeah, people really get the libra **** mixed up and don't think about how it's easier to be on people's good sides even if they're a difficult person than it is to actually deal with them

thorough with that **** is definitely one way of putting it you aren't wrong there

i can definitely cause a lot of permanent damage when i'm not careful, mostly to myself because it always falls back onto me

interesting perspective though, you aren't wrong i just wouldn't have really put that much thought into it in that manner

posted April 12, 2019 04:27 PM            

I think people who think deeply and contemplate a lot about being parents, end up making the best parents. Or at least they don't make their decision on romantic assumptions of what "parenthood" is all about

Your Mc is conjunct my Moon, your Moon is conjunct my Asc, your Mars is conjunct my Mercury and your Venus/Asc are conjunct my Mars/Dsc.

My life is differing from yours but I also tend to doubt if I can make a good parent. I fear "responsibility" as my financial situation is up/down at best.

I think I can provide enough emotional(Moon in Cancer) as well as intellectual support(N.node in Gemini). But I fear that I may disadvantage my kid financially as raising kids is getting increasingly expensive.

posted April 12, 2019 04:55 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Thanks for the feedback.

I think people who think deeply and contemplate a lot about being parents, end up making the best parents. Or at least they don't make their decision on romantic assumptions of what "parenthood" is all about

Your Mc is conjunct my Moon, your Moon is conjunct my Asc, your Mars is conjunct my Mercury and your Venus/Asc are conjunct my Mars/Dsc.

My life is differing from yours but I also tend to doubt if I can make a good parent. I fear "responsibility" as my financial situation is up/down at best.

I think I can provide enough emotional(Moon in Cancer) as well as intellectual support(N.node in Gemini). But I fear that I may disadvantage my kid financially as raising kids is getting increasingly expensive.

My cut off age is 40. I think of it very much each year qnd go back/forth with it. But I will come to a conclusion soon. My childhood was fine(ideal by some standards) and so thats not a bother.

---

yeah no romantic assumptions here, i think being realistic is important and honestly because my childhood was **** i feel like the one thing i learned from it is how crucial being a good parent can be and how there's nothing more important when you have a kid than to be a good parent to them and a good partner to the person you're raising them with

that kind of thing is so critical that it's terrifying lol

damn we have some pretty decent synastry there, maybe that's why i enjoy talking to you and respect the way your mind works

financial **** aside, that's been steadily improving since rebuilding after heroin as far as my life goes though stability is never a guarantee my life has been so full of ups and downs too though in my case lifestyle really affected that and i don't know what living sober for an extended period of time and not focusing on partying is or where that'll take me

i think in a lot of ways looking at like financial stability is something everyone necessarily will always keep and having that hold you back creates unnecessary difficulty

my other issue with having a kid is honestly that with my health issues there's a good chance of me dying while they're young and me not getting to see them actually grow up

i've been relatively lucky so far all things considered, but statistically speaking i better hope for a miracle and modern medicine doesn't have anything to offer me as far as that goes

kind of funny to be cleaning up and trying to pull myself together at this point considering now would probably have been the better time to go crazy with drugs, but i'm an idiot who does things backwards lol

i try not to really think about it too much when i think about the future but that's reality too, and in a way i suppose that's a reason why maybe having a kid with her would be important for her if that's what the future ends up like