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Author Topic:   Mars in Cancer (men) - how do you know if they like you?
doubletaurus
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From: USA
Registered: Jan 2011

posted April 15, 2019 04:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for doubletaurus     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
There's this taurus sun, sag asc, virgo moon, aries mercury, gem venus, and CANCER mars guy I kind of have an interest in and I am trying to better understand him.

I understand Mars in Cancer is usually emotion based. I, on the other hand, am not connected with my emotions very well so I am learning about him based on observation and TRYING to read between the lines.

How can you tell if they like you? What are your experiences with one pursuing you or you pursuing them? I don't pick up on emotions well, but I can try to observe his actions and the situation.


LONG READ - CAN IGNORE - JUST WANT TO KNOW MORE ON MARS CANCER

So we've been friends for about 4-6 years, met through a mutual friend and would hang out usually for drinks or to play video games/sports. He moved about 3 years ago to the West Coast and we would hangout whenever we visit each other's respective state.

So last year, we did a camping trip together, just him and I, no big deal considering we did one the year prior (TO ME it's not a big deal even if we shared a tent- but he didn't make a move or anything). Then it was last year, I noticed a few things like he would get into my personal space more often, or find an excuse to touch my hand. He didn't do that with my other girlfriend that came on the trip later, nope. He wasn't as touchy feely or any of that with her. I didn't think much of it, but for some reason I just got the feeling it was different. I complimented this person on their handwriting and before you know it, he complimented me on mine. It wasn't like that before and I brushed it off because it might be a fluke, but for once I think my intuition was right. He didn't make any physical moves like an obvious arm around my shoulder, but it was subtle and I noticed.

Anyways, fast forward to a year later. He would tell me about places he's going, like he says, he'll be in a big city that's close by to my state for a certain weekend. Or he'd tell me about this concert that's happening in his state. Not giving me a direct invite to join him nor was it in the context of anything (it's usually out of the blues). Just letting me know. He knows I am the type to take up any travels because I love traveling and he knows I like these certain type of concerts. Sometimes he'll directly invite me to things, but sometimes not.

I tend to stay over at his place, on the couch of course and for several days - usually it's because it's a friends reunion and we're all going out. He says I am always welcomed and I take him up on that OFTEN. I ask EVERY time (ALL THE TIME) to see if he's okay with certain dates and he says to come whenever and would offer to stay at his place. He'd ask if I was hungry and makes me food. I offer to clean, but he never lets me though sometimes I just clean anyways like the trash or wipe down the counter. He'd asked if I wanted to do some activities with him like throwing the ball around or whatever and I'd join. I mean to a Mars in Cancer and esp Taurus sun? home is THEIR place. So they don't really allow just anyone? But I think they allow their friends. Right? the Mars in Cancer makes them as a care taker so it's natural they like to cook and take care of their friends/lover.

I gave him a card that recapped one of our hiking trips and he puts the card over his coat rack and shoes near the door. I'm surprised he didn't keep it in his room, something more intimate. The only things on his fridge is a postcard from another girl (i presume) and a wedding invite. So not sure about this. I thought it was interesting.

We were watching a movie and he sighed a lot. It was an action film and I asked if he wanted to change the movie and he said he was fine with it. Which in hind sight is probably a no and he wanted me to change it, but I wouldn't know to what.

On this recent camping trip with a friend, they were talking about a girl he must like (she has a bf) and he goes on kinda in a way of liking her, but not really doing anything about it. I'm pretty sure he is talking to a lot of other girls or even if he's not, I am trying to understand his and mine interactions, that's all.

He asks for my opinion on things a lot, but I think it's in his nature to do things as a team so I think he would be like that with anyone. Or if he wanted to get his way, without being direct.

We do not text another unless it's to visit or I ask a random question, but don't continue the conversation so there's that. I know he's capable of texting and calling. I don't initiate or continue a conversation really... And when I am with him in person, it feels like there's a communication block like I can't express myself as much. Though I am trying to overcome that by saying more now and ignoring the block.

I've gotten about 3 times that him and I are labelled as a couple. The most recent one, he told the person that "we have a love-hate relationship, where he's full of love and I'm the hate". I've read that Mars in Cancer they tend to say things that may sound platonic or romantic, just to see the other's reaction - as if it was favorable or not.

Anyways, I feel like he's just observing me now or maybe not. Maybe I could be imagining all of this, which is possible too, but at least I would like your thoughts and opinions on Mars in Cancer (men specifically, but if you are female, please provide your input too!).

Thanks

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Dumuzi
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posted April 15, 2019 07:50 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
the mars in cancer guy i hooked up with for a bit was this guy i used to drink/smoke weed with for a while

he went about hooking up in a way that was a little odd because he mostly spoke about it with my fiancee (he told her about him being bi he told her he had a thing for me and for her etc) and then with me he just started touching more, getting closer, doing **** like putting his arms around me when we'd share a joint etc once she told him i was fine with it, so he was really direct in a physical manner but not verbally with me

usually the more wasted i was the more forward he was (he'd always drink less than id end up drinking and **** ) but always touching and cuddling etc

which is interesting because the mars in cancer chick who had a thing for me just came right out and said she wanted to **** without all that

based on the guy i knew i imagine this guy likes you, but has a hard time expressing that verbally

we pretty much only spoke in person, no texting, if he was texting it was to say he was coming by

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DualGemV2
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From: Toronto, Ontario
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posted April 15, 2019 09:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for DualGemV2     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm definitely more passive until I feel comfortable enough to say something.

Thats primarily why I'm much better with Leo and Aquarius females, they have the extra push...for me to come out and say something.

I could say more but I I don't want to give bad suggestions.

When dealing with Mars in Cancer think of the clip from the 2001 Movie Enemy at the Gates. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wMvTR012Dmg

Commisar Danilov: "Do you know how to shoot?"
Vassili: "A Little..."

Then he ends up revealing he's actually a competent sniper..just a little shy to say so from the beginning.

My Planets
=========================================
☉‘ ♊, ☽ ♈, ASC ♑, ☿ ♊, ¡÷ ♉, ¡ö ♋ , ♃ ♒, ♄ ♏, ♅ ♐, ♆ ♑

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Hikaru29
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posted April 15, 2019 11:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Hikaru29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Cancer is a Cardinal sign. They like to pursue, not be pursued, and if they like someone, they will not take long to act and they will be subtle but obvious.

I got to know a Mars in Cancer guy 20yrs ago. It was obvious that he liked me (even his friend could tell). He didn't pursue me because he was married but he would always hover around me, do me favours, send me home, etc... and once he said something flirty like "you smell so good". I would playfully "bully" him and he would always let me.

My last guy also has a Cancer Mars. He was a bit shy and sometimes appeared unsure but he made his interest clear. After our first meeting, he texted me on/off and hinted that he wanted to see me again so I gave him a window and he jumped right in. The 2nd time we met, he held my hand and kissed me the moment he found the opportunity.

So IME, they're not as passive as what people made them out to be. They will make themselves felt (like hovering around you...very attentive and "soft" etc) without expressing anything. You need to encourage them by giving them a "window". If they jump in it means they're definitely interested.

As for your guy, I personally think that if a man hasn't acted on his interest after 1yr of such closeness, it's likely he isn't that interested. Note that he has a Gemini Venus. People of this Venus sign (men & women) are capable of having very close platonic friendships w/o romantic interest. They're also very flirty and chatty so it's weird that you and him have a communication block. You said that he also doesn't text you unless it's to ask a random qn? It doesn't seem like his interest is high. But I could be wrong since I'm not there to visually gauge his behaviour.

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Nine
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From: The Cusp of Love
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posted April 15, 2019 12:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nine     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Same as above, Cancer is a cardinal sign they will initiate. Unlike Aries or Capricorn, they will need to study the situation for the best time to act.

I met four last year (Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Virgo), personally I felt they were all attracted to me. Of the lot I liked the way the Cancer and Leo expressed this mars; considerate but strong. I loathe the woe-is-me/ cry-baby act this placement can put on, which was the case with the Gemini & Virgo.

The Gemini was very passive-aggressive.

The cancer I was attracted to initially, but he was intensely secretive, and too lax with his hygiene. I suspect he wanted to be chased.

It was rumored the Leo was a major league a-hole, though he hid that from me. His Venus was conjunct my Sun, and my pMars was conjunct his nVenus. He was easy to talk to; I taught him things, and he taught me things. I liked being around him. In another time he's the sort of guy I would marry. He never made a move, but he left himself available to be pursued.

Virgo was the most annoying. This one had moon & Venus in Scorpio. We argued a lot until I caught on. I'd back him into a corner and instead of conceding defeat he kept going. This one made a move. Early on I thought I made it clear I didn't like him. While initially he could approach me, later on I became closed off to him...

Then an Aqua entered the picture...and Mr. Virgo started acting out. Aqua winked at me and I blushed. Next time Aqua came through, Virgo jumped in my line of sight to face Aqua. Next time I was alone with him, he caressed my hand. I was livid, but didn't want to give the satisfaction of upsetting me, I simply acted as if I hadn't noticed.

A third time he intentionally tried to bump into me, I dodge it. Not to forget the Scorpio-esque eye-lock. This was in the beginning. We were having a light conversation, I made a joke and before I knew it our eyes locked. I made a face and giggled my way out of it.

He'd also say things like; I heard you went to the gym with so & so, I like working out and doing things like that. I'm staying at xyz hotel in room 317.

In addition to Mars in Cancer. His nSun is conjunct my Ascendant. My pVenus (15° cancer) was conjunct his nMars (15° cancer).

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Brenda_S
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posted April 15, 2019 03:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Brenda_S     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Taurus Sun, Cancer Mars here.

If I am to look at it from a subjective point of view, the more I like you the less you know. But I definitely don't act the same way with all the guys I like. I think it evolves.

That being said, I'm much more comfortable now with the thought of admitting to liking someone vs in the past. In the past if I told it to you it was bs. I remember once having this dramatic interaction with someone telling them that because I like him dot dot dot. I really wasn't into him. Lol dunno it was more my Gemini Moon I guess. But it didn't necessarily bother me cuz I knew it wasn't gonna go anywhere anyway. And my actions were in line with it as well. I messaged him and all... He wouldn't suspect that I wasn't into him. But I did prepare him though. I told him in the beginning still that if in a couple of weeks we don't have anything in common anymore then he shouldn't get insulted cuz that's what usually tends to happen with me. But I acted super interested.

Lately I'm very upfront though. If I'm not into you I'll play the cold shoulder or even tell you straight up. I hate that it makes people feel like crap, but I don't have the patience to get involved with and have just random people consume my day.

With all you said I think the chances of him liking you are pretty high. The fact that he mentions movies and wants to see your reaction to his 'offer'.

I wouldn't tell a person 'sure come over anytime'. I'm very selfish with my space. I'll make it obvious that I'm making conscious effort this time to allow them in. Even good friends. But if I like you anything flies.

The guy I liked most I just acted weird with. I definitely wasn't upfront in the beginning. Just weird spurts of emotion surfaced here and there. He probably suspected that I like him since he's pretty intuitive. But you're saying you're different in that sense.

Based on what you said, even if he didn't make a move yet... He's probably uncomfortable or uncertain how you feel about him. But I wouldn't take it as a no.

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DualGemV2
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posted April 15, 2019 07:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for DualGemV2     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Nine:
... I loathe the woe-is-me/ cry-baby act this placement can put on, which was the case with the Gemini & Virgo.

The Gemini was very passive-aggressive.


Lol, describes another Gem that was born 12hrs before me.

My Libra buddy and I use to say how needy he was..he was more watery then me. I have some earth to keep me grounded....most of the time.

As per the passive-aggressiveness, I can show that sometimes.

I think its the combination of being mercurial enough to think...but also afraid to lose.

So instead of being direct, find a way to hit back without taking any loss. The only way to do that is by being passive-aggressive.

Did the Virgo and Gem ever display manipulation tactics out of there own insecurity?

My Planets
=========================================
☉‘ ♊, ☽ ♈, ASC ♑, ☿ ♊, ¡÷ ♉, ¡ö ♋ , ♃ ♒, ♄ ♏, ♅ ♐, ♆ ♑

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Nine
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posted April 16, 2019 06:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nine     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The Gemini was manipulative when I still engaged him. Once I brushed him off he pretty much moved on.

The Virgo was the real pain to get rid of. Almost refusing to accept I wasn't interested.

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Dumuzi
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posted April 16, 2019 07:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Nine:
The Gemini was manipulative when I still engaged him. Once I brushed him off he pretty much moved on.

The Virgo was the real pain to get rid of. Almost refusing to accept I wasn't interested.


probably because of the scorpio placements too, though the cancer mars guy i hooked up with had restraining orders from 2 chicks he stalked one for a while the other eventually dropped it she was having his kid (they were on/off again when we were hooking up)

i knew him a while before he brought that up,but yeah he did **** like that sometimes to people he dated

he'd talk about both like they were meant to be with him in the future and **** like that, really crazy ****

he had a pretty bad chart generally though from what i remember though and his mars was retrograde opposite his sun

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Randall
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posted April 19, 2019 05:51 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Bump!

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doubletaurus
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From: USA
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posted April 25, 2019 03:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for doubletaurus     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ahhh thank you everyone for your input

Dumuzi: from your experience he definitely has more body language and expressed it that way - very indirect Imo. Which to me being direct is telling me ... Like the female Mars in cancer! And that's how me and this friend is like... Text to plan to do something. I live in another state so having a long distance conversation ... It's nice but I don't think either one of us wants that. We both like doing things in person. I appreciate your input


DualGemV2: great clip!! Loved the movie! And that's relatable to the Mars cancer... Like they're not direct but they're fully capable. They're not a show off but they are show... If that makes sense! What do you mean by the extra push? Like I think he is being cautious about me but it could be all in my head. I'm not sure what to look out for... I remember getting a fortune cookie that started, an admirer is too shy to greet you and I showed it to him and he laughed but I got a sense from him like it's relatable. Most of my other friends would make a smart comment so there's that lol

Hikaru29: ooooo I love this detailed information about Mars in cancer! Oh he doesn't usually initiate the text though lately he has.. probably since I'm going to visit his state soon and moving there temporarily in the summer. We're the type to not really text or talk really close... Though we have taken long road trips together (socal to Seattle or another 4-5 hr) we enjoy each other's company but I can sense there was something more since another friend came on the trip later and there was a subtle behavior change. It feels like he wants me to insure something to like give him a go? Or something. But I appreciate your insight and will keep watching!

I'll finish my response to the other responses in this thread but I definitely appreciate hearing everyone's experience and thoughts

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ChildofVenus
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posted April 25, 2019 06:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for ChildofVenus     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
They won't come out directly and say they like you. You'll have to pick up on the clues.

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Nine
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From: The Cusp of Love
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posted April 27, 2019 11:10 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nine     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:

They won't come out directly and say they like you. You'll have to pick up on the clues.

What happens if you don't pick up on the clues? Do they let it go?

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