posted May 10, 2019 10:52 AM            

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:

i try my best to avoid funerals because of it, i can't deal with the way other people will act and it makes me really uncomfortable to be that level unemotional (i have a very hard time crying at all, like actual tears i can get close occasionally and then it's just gone) and having people who are crying hug me and talk etc

and i'm the same way where i'll just talk myself through something if i'm feeling it just that knowledge of "this will pass" does a lot for me

i actually have pluto in the 1st (with some house systems anyway, my ascendant is libra and pluto is in scorpio) sextile my sun and neptune (my sun trines neptune) but i'm not the obsessive type i don't replay things in my head or obsess about other people etc i'm not sure if it's the positive aspects to it that make it easier or not

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I hate funerals since the last one. That was the first funeral that really got to me and we all (my sisters and I) needed several days to recover. I 've never experienced anything like this before: the heaviness, the sadness, I could feel it physically and it wore me down. It was a good friend who died and it was hard watching her children cry.

posted May 10, 2019 01:25 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by kani:
I hate funerals since the last one. That was the first funeral that really got to me and we all (my sisters and I) needed several days to recover. I 've never experienced anything like this before: the heaviness, the sadness, I could feel it physically and it wore me down. It was a good friend who died and it was hard watching her children cry.

Then maybe it's not (just) her Pluto in the 1st. I have Pluto in the 4th which can be very obsessive with emotions, and my sister is way worse than I am. Must be something else then.
What house system do you use usually?

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i tend to use whole sign, i actually generally don't even use tropical because i prefer a blended western/vedic style for reading but since i'm here it's easier to go with what everyone generally prefers

i've found a handful of other house systems intriguing but i haven't dug through them enough since generally speaking if it isn't placidus or whole sign it's very fringe and you're unlikely to come across it enough to practice with them enough for me to fully appreciate them

i've just noticed issues with placidus and that when the houses are exceptionally ****** and someone says their placidus chart is wrong reading it whole sign fixes the issues and they're more appreciative of it though all systems work for divination (but technically anything can work for divination) i've also noticed when people post placidus charts and i read them like they're whole sign they like those results too

when i talk in other places i go with whatever the dominant style is because all systems work on some level it's not a big deal so i don't really care much

it's no different than using iching, runes, different tarot decks, scrying etc for divination ultimately if you're good you're good and you'll get the same person regardless (just some details are easier seen with other systems)

that last funeral sounds hellish, the last one i went to was a nightmare too (my fiancee's sister, her dying was heartbreaking though expecting on some level in spite of it being somewhat sudden) it took a lot to even go back to nyc for it in the first place and then just the atmosphere and everything was ****** up

i ended up standing outside for a lot of it chain smoking cigarettes (i had quit for a few months before the funeral, got back and it was instant) because i couldn't deal with being inside

i'm not surprised you needed time to recover, when my fiancee's father died her and her siblings had a really hard time with it and when the kids are younger and their parent wasn't very old it's just not the same (i've been to funerals for people in her family with her and then i avoid them when it's my family, her grandmother's funeral was vaguely amusing in a twin peaks sort of way)

is her pluto well aspected or just in the first? it could be that mine only having easy aspects helps though i do notice i draw a lot of attention and a lot of intense people towards me and experience a lot of heavy pluto **** in my life

could also be that i have a lot of uranus aspects and she might not

posted May 10, 2019 02:23 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
i tend to use whole sign, i actually generally don't even use tropical because i prefer a blended western/vedic style for reading but since i'm here it's easier to go with what everyone generally prefers

i've found a handful of other house systems intriguing but i haven't dug through them enough since generally speaking if it isn't placidus or whole sign it's very fringe and you're unlikely to come across it enough to practice with them enough for me to fully appreciate them

i've just noticed issues with placidus and that when the houses are exceptionally ****** and someone says their placidus chart is wrong reading it whole sign fixes the issues and they're more appreciative of it though all systems work for divination (but technically anything can work for divination) i've also noticed when people post placidus charts and i read them like they're whole sign they like those results too

when i talk in other places i go with whatever the dominant style is because all systems work on some level it's not a big deal so i don't really care much

it's no different than using iching, runes, different tarot decks, scrying etc for divination ultimately if you're good you're good and you'll get the same person regardless (just some details are easier seen with other systems)

that last funeral sounds hellish, the last one i went to was a nightmare too (my fiancee's sister, her dying was heartbreaking though expecting on some level in spite of it being somewhat sudden) it took a lot to even go back to nyc for it in the first place and then just the atmosphere and everything was ****** up

i ended up standing outside for a lot of it chain smoking cigarettes (i had quit for a few months before the funeral, got back and it was instant) because i couldn't deal with being inside

i'm not surprised you needed time to recover, when my fiancee's father died her and her siblings had a really hard time with it and when the kids are younger and their parent wasn't very old it's just not the same (i've been to funerals for people in her family with her and then i avoid them when it's my family, her grandmother's funeral was vaguely amusing in a twin peaks sort of way)

is her pluto well aspected or just in the first? it could be that mine only having easy aspects helps though i do notice i draw a lot of attention and a lot of intense people towards me and experience a lot of heavy pluto **** in my life

could also be that i have a lot of uranus aspects and she might not

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ohh, what did your fiancee's sister die from? And I completely understand you wanting to avoid funerals. I don't like them at all, I'm uncomfortable with all the sadness and grief (I guess everyone is to a certain extent), I guess I'm scared of them when it's someone I really cared about and the friend I mentioned in my last post I definitely did care about. It was just so unbelievable (and still is) that she is not here anymore. And yes it is something else when the parents are not that old.

posted May 10, 2019 03:21 PM            

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Originally posted by kani:
ohh, what did your fiancee's sister die from? And I completely understand you wanting to avoid funerals. I don't like them at all, I'm uncomfortable with all the sadness and grief (I guess everyone is to a certain extent), I guess I'm scared of them when it's someone I really cared about and the friend I mentioned in my last post I definitely did care about. It was just so unbelievable (and still is) that she is not here anymore. And yes it is something else when the parents are not that old.

I just checked my sister's chart and she has not many Pluto aspects actually. Just Pluto quincunx sun (I have that, too) and Pluto conjunct Saturn. She has a full first house though (Mars, Pluto, Saturn and Jupiter). She has more Uranus than Pluto with moon conjunct Uranus at 0 degrees, mercury square Uranus (I have that as well) and Venus sextile Uranus. I wonder where her obsessive side comes from. She tends to be so repetitive about the things she talks about (that bothered her) as if she needs to retell stuff a thousand times in order to digest it and let it go (which never seems to happen though...the letting go that is haha). I can't see the obsessive qualities in her chart anywhere. At least not aspect or sign wise.

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drug overdose, she was in her early 20's, it wasn't the first time she od'd it was just the last, and she had just gotten out of the hospital not that long before for a suicide attempt that put her in a coma (and she had already made several suicide attempts by that point) so it was both sudden and expected like i said

we were always just kind of waiting for that call on some level

i'm the same way as you with that discomfort, but that funeral i actually went up and spoke at that one at because my fiancee's uncle was nonstop trying to force my fiancee's brother to, and the guy just lost his ******* twin, was in no condition to do that **** , there was only like 10 minutes left before everything had to be wrapped up, and no one else was getting up there to kill time to make their uncle back off so i did

it was a really ****** experience on a lot of levels

some people seem to handle those levels of sadness and grief better, or not mind them, it makes me generally freeze up and want to run away honestly

what happened with your friend? if you don't mind me asking, it's cool if you don't want to get into it (i know you're like me in a lot of ways it seems so i don't want to make you feel pushed if it's something you'd rather not think about too much)

maybe it's having saturn with pluto? i'm assuming there's no scorpio involved based on what you said

i have venus conjunct ascendant (from the 12th, 2 degrees) and then pluto 1st house and that's it as far as first house goes and saturn only exists to square my sun (edit: well that and **** with my 2nd house by being there and rule my mars/ic/4th house but whatever)

posted May 10, 2019 04:57 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
drug overdose, she was in her early 20's, it wasn't the first time she od'd it was just the last, and she had just gotten out of the hospital not that long before for a suicide attempt that put her in a coma (and she had already made several suicide attempts by that point) so it was both sudden and expected like i said

we were always just kind of waiting for that call on some level

i'm the same way as you with that discomfort, but that funeral i actually went up and spoke at that one at because my fiancee's uncle was nonstop trying to force my fiancee's brother to, and the guy just lost his ******* twin, was in no condition to do that **** , there was only like 10 minutes left before everything had to be wrapped up, and no one else was getting up there to kill time to make their uncle back off so i did

it was a really ****** experience on a lot of levels

some people seem to handle those levels of sadness and grief better, or not mind them, it makes me generally freeze up and want to run away honestly

what happened with your friend? if you don't mind me asking, it's cool if you don't want to get into it (i know you're like me in a lot of ways it seems so i don't want to make you feel pushed if it's something you'd rather not think about too much)

maybe it's having saturn with pluto? i'm assuming there's no scorpio involved based on what you said

i have venus conjunct ascendant (from the 12th, 2 degrees) and then pluto 1st house and that's it as far as first house goes and saturn only exists to square my sun (edit: well that and **** with my 2nd house by being there and rule my mars/ic/4th house but whatever)

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Don't worry, I don't feel pushed. I'm ok talking about that, if I weren't I' d tell you but thank you for saying this
My friend died of cancer. She was 15 years older than me and she used to play with me and look after me when I was a little child. I saw her about 10 months before her death and she seemed so hopeful to get better (she lived far away from me at this point). Im still very close to her (adoptive) mother, who has been the longest and closest of our family friends and I'm still close to both of her children. The oldest of her kids is 10 years younger than me. I just chatted with him the other day.

So sad to hear about your woman's sister's life. She seems to have been a tormented soul. With cases like that I always wonder if there was some heavy trauma involved for them to go down that path. I take it the parents are still alive?

posted May 10, 2019 08:14 PM            

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Originally posted by kani:
Don't worry, I don't feel pushed. I'm ok talking about that, if I weren't I' d tell you but thank you for saying this
My friend died of cancer. She was 15 years older than me and she used to play with me and look after me when I was a little child. I saw her about 10 months before her death and she seemed so hopeful to get better (she lived far away from me at this point). Im still very close to her (adoptive) mother, who has been the longest and closest of our family friends and I'm still close to both of her children. The oldest of her kids is 10 years younger than me. I just chatted with him the other day.

So sad to hear about your woman's sister's life. She seems to have been a tormented soul. With cases like that I always wonder if there was some heavy trauma involved for them to go down that path. I take it the parents are still alive?

Saturn conj. Pluto does sound heavy doesn't it. Like something that could make the native obsessive in a way and it being in the 1st house...yeah that might be the explanation. She has Jupiter in Scorpio (in the 1st) but the rest of the planets are in Libra. She is also a Libra ascendant, like you. Her obsessiveness is not that much "in your face" like it might be with heavy Scorpio or 8th house people. It's a bit hidden behind her Libra mask but it's definitely a dominant trait of hers.

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it's that i tend to just run my mouth and i wasn't sure if you asked but didn't share because it hurt too much

that must've been hard, i actually have a friend who's 11 years older than me that i've known since i was 15 and she has cancer currently for the 2nd time and i'm not really sure how it's going to go because it seems more like it's about slowing things down (her oldest son must be about 12 years younger than me i think, i'm terrible with people's ages, her youngest is still in hs) than it is about her ever getting better

our friendship has always been volatile and on/off (she has a scorpio moon and the intensity is a lot for me sometimes i think her pluto might be around where my ascendant is too so there's all that too) and i cut her out for a while but she got in touch with me the other day and as much as i dont want to continue that cycle we started talking again and i'm trying to just avoid it this time

it's good at least that the kids have you around, when my fiancee's father died their mother cut them off from so many people and really isolated them so it was more than them all just losing their dad

lot of heavy trauma there, my fiancee's father died when we were in hs so her brother and sister were 9 about to be 10 and their mother (who was always abusive) really started to lose it afterward, she fed all of us drugs at one point or another (i had my own issues with opiates and their mother was the one who introduced me to them when i was 15, she's also done **** like grope me and call me into rooms for help with things then be in the middle of changing her clothes and **** etc), she'd do **** like go off with different guys and leave my fiancee to take care of them (so i'd help her, the first few years of us dating was us taking care of her siblings i used to wake them up for school and help them with their homework and **** )

when my fiancee and i ended up moving out of state when they were older things got worse with their mother and she got worse with pushing drugs on my fiancee's sister in particular and using them to control her

aside from that she had been through a lot of trauma from other things in her life (rape and so on) and the loss of a friend of hers who she was in love with but never told (they had a suicide pact together and the chick ran off and killed herself in another state with the assisted suicide benzos they bought together because she wanted my fiancee's sister to live) and nightmares from when she was a kid seeing people jumping from the wtc from her schoolyard while she was playing during 9/11 (her entire class saw it) so it was just a lot of horrible **** that haunted her

on top of that she had a xanax addiction from the time she was a kid (her mother had her on them since she was a pre-teen) and she ended up with a lot of neurological damage from abusing it and quitting/getting back on (that whole cycle) and was told she was going to have early onset alzeheimer's by her doctors and she just saw that as a death sentence completely

just so much **** really, that probably came out like a mess, sorry about that

posted May 10, 2019 10:06 PM            

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Originally posted by virgolotus:
Aqua moon came to mind.

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Can simple please explain to me what this means? I mean I have Aquarius moon and people say we rationalize out feelings away and try to deal with then logically, however I don’t believe I do that. So Im a bit lost at what that means. Maybe I don’t get what it means. But as an Aquarius moon I don’t recall ever trying to rationalize my emotions. I do talk to myself in my head in an emotional situation. Like I vent in my head like Im talking to somebody about how Im feeling and I tell myself to never trust again or not be nice anymore, to stop getting stepped on. Is this rationalizing your emotions?

posted May 11, 2019 03:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
it's that i tend to just run my mouth and i wasn't sure if you asked but didn't share because it hurt too much

that must've been hard, i actually have a friend who's 11 years older than me that i've known since i was 15 and she has cancer currently for the 2nd time and i'm not really sure how it's going to go because it seems more like it's about slowing things down (her oldest son must be about 12 years younger than me i think, i'm terrible with people's ages, her youngest is still in hs) than it is about her ever getting better

our friendship has always been volatile and on/off (she has a scorpio moon and the intensity is a lot for me sometimes i think her pluto might be around where my ascendant is too so there's all that too) and i cut her out for a while but she got in touch with me the other day and as much as i dont want to continue that cycle we started talking again and i'm trying to just avoid it this time

it's good at least that the kids have you around, when my fiancee's father died their mother cut them off from so many people and really isolated them so it was more than them all just losing their dad

lot of heavy trauma there, my fiancee's father died when we were in hs so her brother and sister were 9 about to be 10 and their mother (who was always abusive) really started to lose it afterward, she fed all of us drugs at one point or another (i had my own issues with opiates and their mother was the one who introduced me to them when i was 15, she's also done **** like grope me and call me into rooms for help with things then be in the middle of changing her clothes and **** etc), she'd do **** like go off with different guys and leave my fiancee to take care of them (so i'd help her, the first few years of us dating was us taking care of her siblings i used to wake them up for school and help them with their homework and **** )

when my fiancee and i ended up moving out of state when they were older things got worse with their mother and she got worse with pushing drugs on my fiancee's sister in particular and using them to control her

aside from that she had been through a lot of trauma from other things in her life (rape and so on) and the loss of a friend of hers who she was in love with but never told (they had a suicide pact together and the chick ran off and killed herself in another state with the assisted suicide benzos they bought together because she wanted my fiancee's sister to live) and nightmares from when she was a kid seeing people jumping from the wtc from her schoolyard while she was playing during 9/11 (her entire class saw it) so it was just a lot of horrible **** that haunted her

on top of that she had a xanax addiction from the time she was a kid (her mother had her on them since she was a pre-teen) and she ended up with a lot of neurological damage from abusing it and quitting/getting back on (that whole cycle) and was told she was going to have early onset alzeheimer's by her doctors and she just saw that as a death sentence completely

just so much **** really, that probably came out like a mess, sorry about that

libras can be more obsessive and ocd than a lot of people give them credit for, at least in my experience (libra mother and a libra heavy brother) mindnumbingly so, it's the balance thing

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posted May 11, 2019 04:02 PM            

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Originally posted by kani:
Thank you for telling me this, and no, it didn't come out like a mess, it's actually quite coherent.
But, what the actual f? that's horrid! No wonder her sister had issues. And pushing drugs on kids must be among the lowest of the low. Also, sexually harrassing you must have been really unocomfortable for you to say the least. I take it your fiancee has no contact with her mother anymore?
And I totally agree with Libras being obsessive. I know a couple of them whó are like that actually.

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you're welcome and good i wasn't sure because not only is it a lot but i wasn't aware of how much it was actually going to bother me to say it til i started lol but by then i was already in it so i just went with it, depressing though

it was uncomfortable yeah, but at the same time i'm so used to people being like that with me that i'm a little numb to it as ****** as it sounds i've just dealt with that kind of **** from people of both genders since i was a kid and it's just normal on some level

i used to think people were just generally like that until i got older and had people tell me that people are weird with me tbh

my last job this chick i worked with used to go a little too far with groping me and it's so ******* awkward when a woman does it because no one actually takes that **** seriously so i'd just joke about it and focus on the bright side of things (her doing parts of my job for me when she was around) because it was easier that way

the other day my fiancee and i were in a store together and i walked away from her to avoid a chick who worked there who had been really ******* touchy and awkward with hitting on me while my fiancee was in the fitting room the time before

it being her mom was ****** , but like i said used to it so it wasn't a very big deal to me on one level in spite of the discomfort

she's not in contact with her mother anymore though no, and it's been years, even at the funeral she wouldn't speak to her which her mother turned into a huge thing because of course it had to be about her (everything is)

we saw her very briefly a little over a week ago walking her brother back to the house (he lives with their mother and basically takes care of her at this point) we didn't actually even go directly in front of it and it was 4am but as we were getting into a cab and saying bye their mother ran out to yell a bunch of ****** up **** at my fiancee because her adult children caring about each other is a problem and somehow involves her

my mother is a libra so is my older brother, i've seen the obsessive libra traits firsthand especially with my brother who has a libra stellium the balancing act is real and it can get crazy

i can admittedly be a neurotic pain in the ass with that sort of thing, but not nearly as bad as either of them

people go on about virgos being picky and particular but libras are really bad with it and it's the end of the world if things aren't the way they like them

my brother needs his routines, he needs things exactly as he likes them and if they're not he completely loses it

posted May 11, 2019 04:35 PM            

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
you're welcome and good i wasn't sure because not only is it a lot but i wasn't aware of how much it was actually going to bother me to say it til i started lol but by then i was already in it so i just went with it, depressing though

it was uncomfortable yeah, but at the same time i'm so used to people being like that with me that i'm a little numb to it as ****** as it sounds i've just dealt with that kind of **** from people of both genders since i was a kid and it's just normal on some level

i used to think people were just generally like that until i got older and had people tell me that people are weird with me tbh

my last job this chick i worked with used to go a little too far with groping me and it's so ******* awkward when a woman does it because no one actually takes that **** seriously so i'd just joke about it and focus on the bright side of things (her doing parts of my job for me when she was around) because it was easier that way

the other day my fiancee and i were in a store together and i walked away from her to avoid a chick who worked there who had been really ******* touchy and awkward with hitting on me while my fiancee was in the fitting room the time before

it being her mom was ****** , but like i said used to it so it wasn't a very big deal to me on one level in spite of the discomfort

she's not in contact with her mother anymore though no, and it's been years, even at the funeral she wouldn't speak to her which her mother turned into a huge thing because of course it had to be about her (everything is)

we saw her very briefly a little over a week ago walking her brother back to the house (he lives with their mother and basically takes care of her at this point) we didn't actually even go directly in front of it and it was 4am but as we were getting into a cab and saying bye their mother ran out to yell a bunch of ****** up **** at my fiancee because her adult children caring about each other is a problem and somehow involves her

my mother is a libra so is my older brother, i've seen the obsessive libra traits firsthand especially with my brother who has a libra stellium the balancing act is real and it can get crazy

i can admittedly be a neurotic pain in the ass with that sort of thing, but not nearly as bad as either of them

people go on about virgos being picky and particular but libras are really bad with it and it's the end of the world if things aren't the way they like them

my brother needs his routines, he needs things exactly as he likes them and if they're not he completely loses it

granted the only virgo i've ever spent a significant amount of time with is myself, so i can't say for sure but they definitely seem worse with all of that

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You know it annoys me that sexual harrassment, when done by women towards men, is not taken seriously. It is still harrassment and it makes people uncomfortable. But I think it's down to this patriarchal system that sees this type of thing as flattering because "women are weak and can't be sex offenders". This is Bullsh* of course.
Why, in your opinion, have people always acted weird around you? I'm not saying this applies to you, but many times this happens to people who have been sexually abused as a kid and that pattern gets repeated when they are older: perpetrators kinda sniff out that their boundaries are weak. You don't have to answer if it's too private of course. And do you have any astrological explanation for it?

"my brother needs his routines, he needs things exactly as he likes them and if they're not he completely loses it"

posted May 11, 2019 05:27 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by kani:
You know it annoys me that sexual harrassment, when done by women towards men, is not taken seriously. It is still harrassment and it makes people uncomfortable. But I think it's down to this patriarchal system that sees this type of thing as flattering because "women are weak and can't be sex offenders". This is Bullsh* of course.
Why, in your opinion, have people always acted weird around you? I'm not saying this applies to you, but many times this happens to people who have been sexually abused as a kid and that pattern gets repeated when they are older: perpetrators kinda sniff out that their boundaries are weak. You don't have to answer if it's too private of course. And do you have any astrological explanation for it?

"my brother needs his routines, he needs things exactly as he likes them and if they're not he completely loses it"

So much yes! to this. My sister is a Pisces sun but a Libra ascendant with Mars, Saturn and Pluto in Libra and she can be so damn inflexible! My aunt, who is a Libra as well as a cousin of mine are the same, It needs to be their way!
And about Virgo: I'm currently helping my mother out (who is a Virgo) and I've been paying attention to her behaviour really closely and whether she ticks the Virgo boxes. She so does haha! So particular. She is constantly micromanaging and telling people how to do stuff right (or what is right in her mind and that is of course the only type of right). I told her " you think the rest of the world are idiots and you are the only one who knows the way". She had to laugh (I take that as confirmation that I wasn't too far away from the truth). Luckily she is very witty, funny, intelligent and cute and I like spending with her so I don't mind her pickiness too much. I find Virgo one of the funniest signs by the way. Very dry humour and so observant.

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it's annoying yeah, women just get a free pass when they're like that and you just have to brush it off and joke and showing signs of discomfort just make the situation worse

they probably act weird because of what you said, weak boundaries due to abuse, i've just been a magnet since i was a kid and as an adult i'm not very good with defining boundaries or reacting; you're not wrong as far as the astrology goes i'm not sure

i have nessus on my sun 2 degrees, i know all the ties to abuse that has (though i'm not an abuser i have no desire to put someone else through my life) aside from that i don't know i have mars-neptune conjunct which can add to the weak boundaries not sure what else might affect it

i'd definitely blame her libra stellium then, because too much libra is just really intense in that way if it's not their way then suddenly they can't function because then it's all just "too much" lol it's grating to say the least

i can be annoying about things to an extent, for me it's more that in my own space it makes me really anxious to have other people (unless i've had sex with them for some reason) touching my **** or moving things around because i feel like i can feel them on my stuff after and that sets me on edge

which i know is crazy but that's an issue i have with that kind of thing, i'm a complete mess so it's not that i lose things in my bedroom all of the time unless i've actively been using them and i regularly put things in weird spots without thinking (i've found grocery bags full of canned food under a pile of clothes before) and if i didn't live with my fiancee i'd probably be living out of boxes with hardly any furniture or anything other than books, houseplants, and my guitar (and well my bird's stuff) which would probably just be all over the floor

my fiancee says i can be annoyingly picky, but in a way where i'll know what i don't like or want but not be sure of what i do want because i'm also indecisive so i tend to just accept that it's easier if i don't get my way with a lot of things and just let her do what she wants in the house and such because then i don't have to think and if i really dislike something i'll eventually get used to it so it won't make too much of a difference

posted May 12, 2019 05:48 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:

i'm not very good with defining boundaries or reacting; you're not wrong as far as the astrology goes i'm not sure

i have nessus on my sun 2 degrees, i know all the ties to abuse that has (though i'm not an abuser i have no desire to put someone else through my life) aside from that i don't know i have mars-neptune conjunct which can add to the weak boundaries not sure what else might affect it

i'd definitely blame her libra stellium then, because too much libra is just really intense in that way if it's not their way then suddenly they can't function because then it's all just "too much" lol it's grating to say the least

i can be annoying about things to an extent, for me it's more that in my own space it makes me really anxious to have other people (unless i've had sex with them for some reason) touching my **** or moving things around because i feel like i can feel them on my stuff after and that sets me on edge

which i know is crazy but that's an issue i have with that kind of thing, i'm a complete mess so it's not that i lose things in my bedroom all of the time unless i've actively been using them and i regularly put things in weird spots without thinking (i've found grocery bags full of canned food under a pile of clothes before) and if i didn't live with my fiancee i'd probably be living out of boxes with hardly any furniture or anything other than books, houseplants, and my guitar (and well my bird's stuff) which would probably just be all over the floor

my fiancee says i can be annoyingly picky, but in a way where i'll know what i don't like or want but not be sure of what i do want because i'm also indecisive so i tend to just accept that it's easier if i don't get my way with a lot of things and just let her do what she wants in the house and such because then i don't have to think and if i really dislike something i'll eventually get used to it so it won't make too much of a difference

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I have Mars Neptune, too. A square, but I don't know if it's that strong (it's 4 degrees, I feel squares must be really tight to be felt). My sun is tightly square Neptune though. Mars Neptune could also be about feeling directionless in life. That was my issue for a long time, especially considering what I wanted to do for a living. I never knew for sure - I did know it must be sth. creative and tied to film making - but it did take me a while to find out what exactly and how to go about it. Neptune also squares my MC.
You do have a Venus Pluto aspect as far as I remember, don't you? That might have sth. to do with people coming on to you and being inappropriate.

"i can be annoying about things to an extent, for me it's more that in my own space it makes me really anxious to have other people touching my **** or moving things around"

posted May 12, 2019 11:05 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by kani:

I have Mars Neptune, too. A square, but I don't know if it's that strong (it's 4 degrees, I feel squares must be really tight to be felt). My sun is tightly square Neptune though. Mars Neptune could also be about feeling directionless in life. That was my issue for a long time, especially considering what I wanted to do for a living. I never knew for sure - I did know it must be sth. creative and tied to film making - but it did take me a while to find out what exactly and how to go about it. Neptune also squares my MC.
You do have a Venus Pluto aspect as far as I remember, don't you? That might have sth. to do with people coming on to you and being inappropriate.

"i can be annoying about things to an extent, for me it's more that in my own space it makes me really anxious to have other people touching my **** or moving things around"

My mum is like that. She likes to have control about how her space is organised. I can be like that as well though. I have a system that I want people to follow when they are at mine. No Virgo in my chart though, maybe it's Virgo by inheritance because my mum is one haha
How would you describe your sense of humour? Do you consider yourself to be sarcastic?

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i think it probably depends on other things in a chart or how aware you are of things, my conjunction is loose but i notice it because for a cap mars... well i'm me

that's my chart (took it from a different thread where i was discussing lilith and priapus), i have nessus @28 degrees leo conjunct my sun which is probably what does it

like you i have sun-neptune, but trine

i definitely have a tendency to feel directionless, but i spent a lot of my early 20's on/off helping my fiancee raise her brother and sister (we've lived together 13 of the 14 years we've been together) so i was in my early 20's raising teenagers and not really focusing on myself and then just a lot of moving back and forth and drugs etc then bad health issues the past 6 years (unrelated to drugs)

i used to write, well i guess technically i still do but it's only been music related lately which is different (which reminds me i'm a terrible person i promised to do some **** with my fiancee's brother relating to that and i havent recorded anything)

no venus-pluto (i might've mentioned my brother's pluto being conjunct my ascendant/venus) though my fiancee has it, she gets weird **** too but different weird **** than what i do

she has this guy we went to hs with who messages her every few months to talk then he asks her if she's still with me and stops talking to her abruptly then repeat, and he's been doing that since hs (he ******* hates me and has since hs admittedly me and this other guy used to make fun of him constantly and probably made his life hell, but he'd tag along and sortof hang out with us because he had a crush on my fiancee and actually asked her out before i ever did she turned him down but he just keeps trying) but she's had less of the people just being touchy kind of **** than i have and more just weird stalker-ish behavior from people instead

i dont really have a system, but if i use something frequently i keep it around wherever i tend to use it so if it's moved then it's annoying and i hate it because then i have to look for it instead of it being conveniently where i left it

i think it also bothers me because as a kid my mother used to do **** like clean (to go through our **** on some level i'm pretty sure) and then half my **** would be missing or misplaced and she'd never know where she put it so i'd either find it weeks later or it'd legit just be gone so people touching **** comes with a certain level of anxiety from that too im sure

but yeah my only system is "i was using this recently so it's out, dont touch this one drawer i throw things into that im not using" aside from that i dont care