posted August 07, 2019 09:09 PM            

My gemini sun, capricorn moon, gemini venus is EXACTLY THE SAME.

I want to punch him in the face sometimes....but I am all roses and collaborating with legal and friends behind closed doors preparing and strategising what I need to do to get it signed off.

You can never win an argument with a gemini I say...walk away from any arguments....have a safe word. Pineapple is ours lol. Come back when you're calm....he could manipulate this too but think one step ahead always, maybe 2 or 3 even. Have all your ducks in a row

I am close, printing agreement right now.....

posted August 08, 2019 06:34 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Moonbeth:
In my case you'd just have to give me time. I can't lie to myself, I would be destroyed anyway if not loved and would let you go and take everything and let myself die for a while.

Really though, in general I wouldn't manipulate people. Especially not when there are laws. You want out, it's your right to.

edit: capricorn anything probably would respond to seeing the offcial papers though.

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Hmm, well, some Cappy moon I know sometimes do a manipulation too (usually about a situation), but they rarely want to admit it, they never wrong in their blood, very stubborn. I'm surrounded by Cappy moon for my whole life so I know, they never want to loose, they should win (achieving what they want using any method, including manipulation if they want to). They lie/hide something by avoiding or being silent/distant or accusing you of something to make you look like a horrible person as they think they aren't, they really good on this, very cold and VERY calculating on doing things.

The calculation part is something dangerous. You know what I mean. That's why I don't want to wait for his time.

I should say that my husband sometimes too blind with a manipulation. Why? Because his ex for years is a Scorpio moon, and she is successfully manipulate him for years and I said that he is pretty DUMB not seeing this because I know the truth and he still defends her and think she is not what I describe. I mean, hello, I have proofs here, I'm not just talking without collecting proofs. And I'm not badmouthing her, I tell him because their stupid drama effecting my peaceful life before and my mouth can't hold to tell the truth, because I can't stand seeing how stupid he is that arguing with me with stupid arguments only making the whole things look stupid.

posted August 08, 2019 06:45 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by starstruck1:
lord help me...

My gemini sun, capricorn moon, gemini venus is EXACTLY THE SAME.

I want to punch him in the face sometimes....but I am all roses and collaborating with legal and friends behind closed doors preparing and strategising what I need to do to get it signed off.

You can never win an argument with a gemini I say...walk away from any arguments....have a safe word. Pineapple is ours lol. Come back when you're calm....he could manipulate this too but think one step ahead always, maybe 2 or 3 even. Have all your ducks in a row

I am close, printing agreement right now.....

Good luck.

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You are lucky to have all of your family and friends backing you up.

I make a mistake that I give up my friends when I am in a relationship with him, because we are always in an argument if I spend some time hanging out, jealousy, and the act of passive aggressiveness that drawing an emotional rollercoaster. I should not make my relationship a priority at the time.

My family is supporting me, but there's some complicated things since he contacts some of my family members.

So, I feel like I should do this alone first, with persuasion/a lil bit manipulation, but how to crack those Cappy moon walls?

posted August 08, 2019 06:47 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Orange:
well, obviously, a peaceful ending is not going to happen with this man, so you just need to put your big girl pants and walk out the door and slam it in his face on the way out, for good.

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posted August 08, 2019 02:03 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hearttreasure:
Hmm, well, some Cappy moon I know sometimes do a manipulation too (usually about a situation), but they rarely want to admit it, they never wrong in their blood, very stubborn. I'm surrounded by Cappy moon for my whole life so I know, they never want to loose, they should win (achieving what they want using any method, including manipulation if they want to). They lie/hide something by avoiding or being silent/distant or accusing you of something to make you look like a horrible person as they think they aren't, they really good on this, very cold and VERY calculating on doing things.

The calculation part is something dangerous. You know what I mean. That's why I don't want to wait for his time.

I should say that my husband sometimes too blind with a manipulation. Why? Because his ex for years is a Scorpio moon, and she is successfully manipulate him for years and I said that he is pretty DUMB not seeing this because I know the truth and he still defends her and think she is not what I describe. I mean, hello, I have proofs here, I'm not just talking without collecting proofs. And I'm not badmouthing her, I tell him because their stupid drama effecting my peaceful life before and my mouth can't hold to tell the truth, because I can't stand seeing how stupid he is that arguing with me with stupid arguments only making the whole things look stupid.

So, I want to try those manipulation method as I am not good at it, I am too honest and almost always to the point. I just want a divorce, maybe using a lil bit smooth manipulation in a good way. I'm not going to take any materials, just his agreement to divorce me.

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I am speechless.... I couldn't disagree more, about everything lol

posted August 08, 2019 11:08 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hearttreasure:
The question is,

How can I manipulate a Gemini man to agree a separation/divorce in a good way? I mean, so we don't fight/argue/being an enemy during the process because I want we are in a good term as we have one kid together.

I've read that Geminis usually friends with all of their exes, but why this Gemini is always very angry if I bring the topic (like he wants to punch me)? He acts like my feeling about not being happy with our relationship/marriage is delusional, that I am lying, or am crazy. Whenever I cry he always mocks me that I fake my tears.

Gemini sun
Capricorn moon
Gemini venus

Any suggestion how to break the bond?

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Do not cry or even use the word "love." Just say the following:

"I want a divorce. Staying married to you doesn't make any sense since I don't feel any sort of connection to you. I'm sorry, but that's the way it is. I hope we can proceed through this divorce has quickly and efficiently as possible without any drama."

Capricorn moon is all about financial stability and he may be worried that you are expecting financial support, which will greatly hurt his income. To put him at ease, say the following:

posted August 11, 2019 10:47 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Astra:
Do not cry or even use the word "love." Just say the following:

"I want a divorce. Staying married to you doesn't make any sense since I don't feel any sort of connection to you. I'm sorry, but that's the way it is. I hope we can proceed through this divorce has quickly and efficiently as possible without any drama."

Capricorn moon is all about financial stability and he may be worried that you are expecting financial support, which will greatly hurt his income. To put him at ease, say the following:

" I don't need any spousal support from you. I will ask for joint custody, so no formal child support payments are needed. Instead, I only ask that we split the costs of major expenses (medical bills, tuition, daycare, etc). I want us to be as cordial as possible with each other so we can co-parent our daughter successfully. It will hurt her even more if we are at each other's throats."

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I had already used those method since the beginning. Not working.

I don't need his spousal support, even in our marriage, the financial is under his control (like I said, he is very calculating in everything) and I never ask his.

Because of using those method, he threatens me to make everything difficult during the process. He also said (and threatens to tell anyone - so he can start a drama telling everyone he is the victim here) that I am not holding my beliefs correctly that I am cruel and arrogant thinking divorce is a good way, that my family is cruel supporting the idea.

The more honest I am, the more he can use it against me. He's quite manipulative and super talented in stirring the pot. He becomes very rude even in a small argument, disrespecting me by calling me crazy or screaming on me, even in front of our daughter, he moves his body on me like he wants to punch me if I said one more words. His two faces makes me disgusting because in front of other people, he doesn't show this evil side, he only shows innocent looking guy.

I cry tears if I really can't hold myself together anymore during an argument. We are very different in personality and I can't stand living together with his behavior. I feel unhappy and I hold everything alone for a long time.

When I said to him that he needs to respect me as a person and a wife, he bullies me.

If I said he acts like a child, he tells me that I am the child. Oh, Gemini's trick, when you put your finger on him, he puts his finger on you, never admit anything in front of you.

posted August 11, 2019 11:08 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Orange:
well, obviously, a peaceful ending is not going to happen with this man, so you just need to put your big girl pants and walk out the door and slam it in his face on the way out, for good.

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posted August 11, 2019 05:28 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hearttreasure:
...
I don't need his spousal support, even in our marriage, the financial is under his control (like I said, he is very calculating in everything) and I never ask his.

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What exactly do you mean by the financial is under his control?.

It happens all the time in divorces were an ex will use the "child" as a hedge against the other they'll say things such as you can't provide for the child and use it has a reason to justify for a divorce.

To bad you can't prove that he is unfit to be a father.

If you already know how he's going to react to things can't you just trap him If you know his pattern of behavior???.

You already know he doesn't like a divorce can't you just give him the impression that its not feasible for a divorce and make him think everything is going his way, then he'll back off a bit if he thinks he's in control.

He has cancer in his chart so if he feels threatened and insecure then he'll use his Gemini mind to be manipulative..but if he feels comfortable and secure he won't be as manipulative, thats why I say let him think things are going his way and make it seam your not confronting him about it.

I say that because once you give a Gemini an idea and it appears to be right or working it will go straight to there head and they'll be unable to react if there wrong or it falls back on them later.

Then you finally find a way to get a successful divorce and he won't be able to react if its fast and sudden because his head will be stuck somewhere else.

I kinda understand his strategy here, he'll be nice to everyone so everyone thinks he's mister wonderful but to the few who really know him he's a completely different person.

The classic Gemini thats nice to the majority then extremely mean to a few people he doesn't like.

posted August 23, 2019 03:40 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by charlie:
If he doesn’t “get it”, better with the band-aid-rip-effect.
It’s gonna hurt and arguments wit ensue but all will be well in the end, when feelings have calmed down.

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I don't share the same view..he'll keep putting her down, even if a divorce was successful he'll reappear in her life and continue to make her life hell.

Gem's can be very atrocious when they want what they want, I don't believe or agree with half the B*llshit trump says or does to get what he wants. Anyway I'm more of a John F. Kennedy kind of Gemini not a Trump kinda Gemini.

You just don't understand Geminis. I know you like anything astrologically related to Cancer but that is were the issues lies with this Gemini she's dealing with.

The Cancer in him makes him emotionally hurt that he can't move on from her.

posted August 23, 2019 07:17 PM            

All the Geminis I have known have been very rational in thought but also very prone to throwing toddler-like tantrums when they don't get their way (not saying all Geminis are like this - but it does seem to be a trend in a fair few, given the likes of Trump and Britain's new Gemini PM Boris Johnson.)

Another thing I've heard is that Geminis like to be thought of as the good guys. Even when they are patently not. In my case, my ex-wife hated the idea that her actions might be cause people to think badly of her. So this is what I used to my advantage. Make sure any requests are for the greater good - as opposed to a personal request - so that he can deduce that failing to agree will paint him in a bad social light.

posted September 21, 2019 08:48 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DualGemV2:
What exactly do you mean by the financial is under his control?.

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I mean, he always keeps his eyes on where do all the pennies go, indirectly, to the point where I feel judged for who I am not. I know he feels stupidly fooled by his ex, but he should not project his trauma on me about money. Sometimes it feels hurt when you are with someone but he doesn't move on from the past AND projecting the past on you, to get a one more time "control".

quote:

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It happens all the time in divorces were an ex will use the "child" as a hedge against the other they'll say things such as you can't provide for the child and use it has a reason to justify for a divorce.

To bad you can't prove that he is unfit to be a father.

If you already know how he's going to react to things can't you just trap him If you know his pattern of behavior???.

You already know he doesn't like a divorce can't you just give him the impression that its not feasible for a divorce and make him think everything is going his way, then he'll back off a bit if he thinks he's in control.

He has cancer in his chart so if he feels threatened and insecure then he'll use his Gemini mind to be manipulative..but if he feels comfortable and secure he won't be as manipulative, thats why I say let him think things are going his way and make it seam your not confronting him about it.

I say that because once you give a Gemini an idea and it appears to be right or working it will go straight to there head and they'll be unable to react if there wrong or it falls back on them later.

Then you finally find a way to get a successful divorce and he won't be able to react if its fast and sudden because his head will be stuck somewhere else.

I kinda understand his strategy here, he'll be nice to everyone so everyone thinks he's mister wonderful but to the few who really know him he's a completely different person.

The classic Gemini thats nice to the majority then extremely mean to a few people he doesn't like.

My Planets
=========================================
☉‘ ♊, ☽ ♈, ASC ♑, ☿ ♊, ˇ÷ ♉, ˇö ♋ , ♃ ♒, ♄ ♏, ♅ ♐, ♆ ♑

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I actually have the same thinking as you, but the problem is my Venus sign is too much forgiving. And my moon sign rarely holds grudges. But my mercury doesn't forget one bit. Sometimes it does get clash within me on what should I do in this situation, especially if the other person also still hold on to and try to fix the problem.

Now he kinda tries to hold his quick temper, emotional reaction on everything. Our relationship is quite more peaceful than before (like I said before, I hate drama and emotional roller coaster). I don't know if he hardly tries to fake it or he now realise the key is in him if he doesn't want to break the relationship.

I think he is the Classic Gemini, but funny tho, he doesn't like being associated with Gemini sign, he always says he is not, but you can see HE IS, although cancer seems dominant in his.

posted September 21, 2019 08:51 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DRVM614K:
What are the rest of his placements.

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Gemini sun
Capricorn moon
Cancer mercury
Cancer mars
Gemini venus

posted September 21, 2019 09:02 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by charlie:
If he doesn’t “get it”, better with the band-aid-rip-effect.
It’s gonna hurt and arguments wit ensue but all will be well in the end, when feelings have calmed down.

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We fight for entire relationship, because he doesn't want to let go.

He fights everyone who tells him to let me go and let the relationship go. He fights my family too.

posted September 21, 2019 09:17 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Capguy75:
My ex-wife was a Gemini Sun/Cappy Moon.

All the Geminis I have known have been very rational in thought but also very prone to throwing toddler-like tantrums when they don't get their way (not saying all Geminis are like this - but it does seem to be a trend in a fair few, given the likes of Trump and Britain's new Gemini PM Boris Johnson.)

Another thing I've heard is that Geminis like to be thought of as the good guys. Even when they are patently not. In my case, my ex-wife hated the idea that her actions might be cause people to think badly of her. So this is what I used to my advantage. Make sure any requests are for the greater good - as opposed to a personal request - so that he can deduce that failing to agree will paint him in a bad social light.

That said, these requests really have to be for the greater good. If you try spinning something selfish in this light you'll likely come unstuck.

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Thanks, I'll keep that on mind.

posted September 22, 2019 10:25 AM            

quote:

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Gemini sun
Capricorn moon
Cancer mercury
Cancer Mars
Gemini venus

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^^This is the problem.

quote:

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We fight for entire relationship, because he doesn't want to let go.

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posted September 22, 2019 11:10 AM            

Cancer Mars 'cares' in a family way {especially in a 'committed' bond}. He envelopes the partner with an umbrella of love, care, and belongingness. Very sensitive inside... with his Venus there too.

Gently... Why haven't you just 'packed your bags' and left his home. Have a legal separation, before settling an ending in divorce. Energetically, this will cause a bodily distancing from you and his body. He won't have you 'there' to trigger his Love for you. He will have no "ability" to keep a tactile love for you directly-- in a physical 'presence' way.

Gemini's can be psychically very aware. It's a talent that some possess, that isn't always talked about with tropical, but rather in Vedic understanding.

Remove your 'presence' from his home, from his aura and 'atmosphere'.

Leave him. Put 'distance' between you. You already have a cold personal-detachment working for you-- now help HIM by removing yourself from the Hearth and Home atmosphere. THAT is his bond.

This would be your way to 'defeat' him.
Take your body and presence AWAY from him.
No contact.

He will MOURN. You won't have to be upset by it, if you're not there to 'witness' it.

Go for personal-counseling for your own self-- not marital, but personal.

Let two years go by.

Somewhere into the separation, make it "legal".

Do NOT reside under the same roof for at least 6 mos before initiating legally?

After you receive some personal counseling-- hire an attorney for 'advice' to Initiate Divorce.

So... Have a COOLING off period.
Remove your presence from him, as you see and put NO HOPE in the relationship.

{Big question-- Why are you still 'living' with him?.. especially since he's such a 'horrible' person?}

DIVORCE hurts. It hurts bad.
Like having your arms and Heart ripped-out of your chest.

For you? .. maybe you're so-detached that it makes no difference.

Have respect that it may be having an affect to your partner with whom you had made a Pledge. You diminish his feelings, reducing the trauma of your rejection of him as 'simply-drama'?? ..

Sorry that you feel your side of the relationship wasn't able to work out.

posted September 22, 2019 01:15 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mirage29:

...

Gently... Why haven't you just 'packed your bags' and left his home. Have a [b]legal separation, before settling an ending in divorce. Energetically, this will cause a bodily distancing from you and his body. He won't have you 'there' to trigger his Love for you. He will have no "ability" to keep a tactile love for you directly-- in a physical 'presence' way.

...[/B]

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I had packed my bags and left our home for six months. I took my two months old daughter with me at that time.

Six months felt like a day to day fighting, big families got involved. The problem had gone beyond finding the win-win solution, it became a huge emotional circles, you know, my Mom and my brother also a Cancer Mars and my big family is quite a Plutonian versus my husband and his Dad's Cancer Mars and his big family with Scorpio influences in their natal.

It was a hard time for me too because I still had to recovery from giving birth and my little baby need a lot of affection and attention, the last thing I need was emotionally drained drama. It was hard to find a balance once you were in the middle of subjective and emotional people around. For some people it became an ego war and it clashed with what I hoped for. Couldn't imagine what happened if we really had a divorce and my daughter's eyes saw a continue fight, I didn't want her to feel all the negative impact I could ever imagine, was my thought.

posted September 22, 2019 02:57 PM            

**BIG Hug**

You are holding down a full-time job too, in order to support self?

One of the reasons I responded to your post is that I do Volunteer Work in town. I prescreen calls from women and men, from wives and husbands, who have children and are fighting for divorce and over custody arrangements and agreements.

Sometimes, the calls even come in from the grandparents too.

All of it-- it tears at my Heart!!!..
Ultimately?, it's really 'the children' that suffer.

And again, my Heart goes out to you in this situation. {{{ }}}

He wants to 'challenge' Paternity?
That must hurt.
It implies that he believes you have been Unfaithful to your vows, and he knows it.

He signed the Birth Certificate as legally declaring himself as DNA 'Father', correct?

Why don't you nip that question in the bud, and get a Paternity Test. Have the DNA checked? The judge would want to see the results of that on the record (if father is actually challenging it, as you 'say' he is?).

I noticed that you are saying 'my' baby, rather than 'ours'.

FAMILIES..
~oy. *smile*

Yep, they can get into the feud too-- especially if religiously inclined also.

Are they 'accusing' you? ..
Are any of them 'helping' you directly with some physical care-breaks?

So ….. ……. …….
I think there's "something else here" going on.
Especially since you say that BOTH families are overwhelmingly against what you're trying to do. What kind of "feedback" are they giving you with all of this? Have you taken the time to consider-carefully what they ALL are trying to say to you?

Is there any chance that you two 'could' find a Peace?

He obviously still loves you.
He has not initiated any charges, legal, against you for 'Child Snatching'?

That's a sign that he is Protecting you and your reputation. He shows signs of CARING for you!!! AND his child--- otherwise he would have legally gone after you, if he was a ruthless mean-souled person?? awww.

With BOTH of you having come from LARGE families, (as I did), he is showing signs that he has exhibited 'respect' for you-- "as a Mother." Large families realize the traditions and values of Motherhood.

Gently, it's a Sign that he STILL wants to work things out?; and subconsciously on your part, I get the sense that YOU do too.

.. 'What' is the fighting?? What's the core of it?

Some of what you're saying sounds like he is in crazyPain right now. From what you write, he's not getting to see and be with his daughter?

If it were JUST A MARRIAGE--
I'd be pretty certain you could split amicably with your Gemini. They are "reasonable" people. IF it were "just" the TWO of you.

BUT, you went from being a couple to becoming a FAMILY when your CHILD was born of this Marriage.

Are you able to put yourself in his shoes for a moment?

IF circumstances were reversed,
and 'he' had physical custody of the child and would not allow you a relationship with the child--
then as a Loving Parent, could you 'understand' HOW it is not simple to JUST dissociate and blankly "Just Let Go" of the child, with no expressed 'feelings' about it?

quote:

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So, the thought maybe using a smoother way to also slowly crack his stubborn head comes to mind..

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