posted August 27, 2010 04:39 PM         

You are an extra-specially special person and, as much as I might only usually spectate, I would miss you.

posted August 27, 2010 05:05 PM         

Ami

posted August 27, 2010 05:13 PM         

stuff gets so blown out of proportion.
tell me decent dirty joke once in awhile and i will be sure to check in.

right now i has to go eat, mr sunshine is taking me out to dinner. I am trying real hard to figure out how to tell him NO MEXICAN again. because it's his favorite and i always do it, NOW he mistakenly thinks it's MY favorite! how to break the news? I want italian! i really really do. white table cloth, REAL italian food.

posted August 27, 2010 05:23 PM         

Cos seven eight nine.

Don't ask me why that one cracks me up, maybe it has to be delivered by a child.

posted August 27, 2010 06:28 PM         

Astrology Jokes! What's your sign?

* How many Aries does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but it takes a lot of light bulbs.

* How many Tauruses does it take to change a light bulb?
What, me move?

* How many Geminis does it take to change a light bulb?
II

* How many Cancers does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but he has to bring his mother.

* How many Leos does it take to change a light bulb?
A dozen. One to change the bulb, and eleven to applaud.

* How many Virgos does it take to change a light bulb?
Five. One to clean out the socket, one to dust the bulb,
one to install, and two engineers to check the work.

* How many Libras does it take to change a light bulb?
Libras can't decide if the bulb needs to be changed.

* How many Scorpios does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They LIKE the dark.

* How many Sagittarians does it take to change a light bulb?
One to install the bulb, and a Virgo to pick up the pieces.

* How many Capricorns does it take to change a light bulb?
The light's fine as it is.

* How many Aquarians does it take to change a light bulb?
Have you asked the bulb if it WANTS to be changed?

posted August 27, 2010 07:05 PM         

Great jokes

X Ami

posted August 27, 2010 07:14 PM         

"It's not hard"

posted August 27, 2010 07:34 PM         

How are women and tornadoes alike?

They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave

posted August 28, 2010 07:10 AM         

An Indian scouting party captures a cowboy from a bar and brings him back to their camp to meet the chief.

The chief says to the cowboy, "You going die, but we sorry for you, so give you one wish a day for three days. At sundown third day, you die. What first wish?"

The cowboy says, "I want to see my horse." The Indians get his horse. The cowboy grabs the horse's ear and whispers something, then slaps the horse on the back. The horse takes off.

Two hours later, the horse comes back with a naked blonde. She jumps off the horse and goes into the teepee with the cowboy.

The Indians look at each other, figuring, "Typical white man... only think one thing."

The second day, the chief says, "What wish today?"

The cowboy says, "I want to see my horse again." The Indians bring him his horse. The cowboy leans over to the horse and whispers something in the horse's ear, then slaps it on the back.

Two hours later, the horse comes back with a naked redhead. She gets off and goes in the teepee with the cowboy.

The Indians shake their heads, figuring, "Typical white man going die tomorrow ... can only think one thing."

The last day comes, and the chief says, "This last wish, white man. What want?"

The cowboy says, "I want to see my horse again." The Indians bring him his horse. The cowboy grabs the horse by both ears, twists them hard and yells, "Read my lips you idiot! POSSE, damn it!

posted August 28, 2010 07:49 AM         

Umm, Winky...

quote:

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* How many Aries does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but it takes a lot of light bulbs.

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What are you trying to say, exactly?