posted May 04, 2011 12:12 AM            

Weak points

-Sometimes I am too critical, to the point of being seen as negative, even though my intention is to be real, and improve things. I just can not stop questioning things or playing devils adovacte sometimes. too much for some people.

-Sometimes I am too blunt or tell it like it is or say what is on my mind to the point of putting my foot in my mouth.

-Every once in a while I am outspoken when I should stay quiet.

-I am too impulsive sometimes (ooohhh, roundtrip ticket to Ireland for 400....BUY! Oh wait, do I have something that week? Oh well.

posted May 04, 2011 03:09 AM            

1. I get tired by being around a lot of people and after a few hours I become a bit sidetracked. I need to have more energy and relaxation time. I think this is because of my Mercury square Uranus – I have too much nervous energy sometimes. My mind goes on overload when a lot of things are happening at the same time (and a lot of ppl around).

2. I am too honest at times of stress. I need to count to 10 before I answer anything at all – when I am stressed.. otherwise I just blurt things out. It’s horrible. This is the opposite of what I am usually like (when not stressed). (Merc/Uranus again – Uranus is in Saggy – sign of honesty… and Mercury is in Pisces – the sign of deception)

3. I haven’t been assertive as much as I should have in certain areas of my life this year. I will do this in time, though… But for now I’m not happy with my actions. I think I’ve been a touch too passive. (Cancer AC sq my Sun – by sign)

4. I need to be more organized. I am juggling a lot of things at the same time and I get to points of complete disorganization. I have to really take some time to just organize everything and have a list of priorities. I will try my best to do that. (Mercury/Uranus again)

5. I need to focus on the present rather than the past or future. I have a tendency to day dream --- and I just have to be more grounded. (Neptune aspects)

posted May 04, 2011 06:18 AM            

1. My eyes can't hide my feelings. My words, my actions all can, whether it is in writing, on the telephone or in person....but my eyes can't. I would love to be able to hide disappointment or hate, but I can't. People always use that "if looks could kill, he'd be a pile of dust right now" line on me, and I hate it!

2. I'm truly the most impatient person on the planet. I'd get on much better in life if I learned to relax more and allow things to take their own time. Too many times I expect the world and everyone in it, to run to my schedule and feel what I feel, drop everything because I want them to etc. Its hard for me not to think the world should revolve around me.

Rachel

posted May 04, 2011 03:42 PM            

I made the decision NOT to love myself ,as a child.
Undoing that decision,as an adult,is not as easy as it sounds.
Yes,with the head, it is easy.However,you body and mind have built up defenses
which are built on the old idea that you were worthless.
Changing these old programs is as hard as losing 500 pounds.
So,my good and bad points are opposite sides of the same coin,you could say lol

posted May 05, 2011 05:15 AM            

Rach

posted May 05, 2011 08:40 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by RMChex:
Ami, just out of interest - you don't love yourself - does that also make you think others won't/shouldn't love you? Or is it a separate issue?

Rach

---

No,Rach
I think I have genuine love from other people.
The hard part is loving myself. I was taught that valuing yourself was selfish and ego centered and more just "bad"
I was taught that if you had genuine pride in yourself ,you were haughty.
Finding self love is the hard thing.
I know I MUST cuz a healthy love of others must have a healthy love of self
IQ told me that we much have healthy Narcisssim.
That is what I mean lol

posted May 05, 2011 08:40 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by RMChex:
Ami, just out of interest - you don't love yourself - does that also make you think others won't/shouldn't love you? Or is it a separate issue?

Rach

---

No,Rach
I think I have genuine love from other people.
The hard part is loving myself. I was taught that valuing yourself was selfish and ego centered and more just "bad"
I was taught that if you had genuine pride in yourself ,you were haughty.
Finding self love is the hard thing.
I know I MUST cuz a healthy love of others must have a healthy love of self
IQ told me that we much have healthy Narcisssim.
That is what I mean lol

posted May 05, 2011 09:55 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ami Anne:
No,Rach
I think I have genuine love from other people.
The hard part is loving myself. I was taught that valuing yourself was selfish and ego centered and more just "bad"
I was taught that if you had genuine pride in yourself ,you were haughty.
Finding self love is the hard thing.
I know I MUST cuz a healthy love of others must have a healthy love of self
IQ told me that we much have healthy Narcisssim.
That is what I mean lol

---

Hiya,

Thanks for answering. I wish I could help you love yourself... if you don't want to discuss it I understand, but I'm just trying to get a feel of it in case any of us can help in any way... The not loving yourself, is it because

a) there are things that are wrong about you (in your opinion) and you actually dislike things about yourself

or

b) there's nothing you don't like per se, but also nothing you particularly do like about yourself

If it is a) then it might be a case of changing some things or learning to accept them or see them differently, before you can learn to move on and like, then love yourself. If it is b) then it maybe a case of constantly telling yourself why you are good, and why others love you.

Rachel x

posted May 05, 2011 10:22 AM            

(((hugs)))

posted May 05, 2011 11:36 AM            

He encouraged me to find my voice.He could see that my flailing was because of that.
I had not been allowed to be anything other than invisible in my childhood.

posted May 05, 2011 01:43 PM            

I understand what you've said - and I imagine it has been a big step to a) recognise what has changed for you and b) say it openly. Good for you!

So with regard to your self-opinion, what are you hoping will be the biggest changes once you have learned to love yourself? Is it just that you will feel different, feel accepted and at ease with the world? Or is it something more tangible, like you will be able to do something in life you wouldn't have thought possible originally?

What do you like about yourself? What qualities about you would you list if an alien came down from <insert your favourite planet> and said he was going to kidnap all but the worthy people of the planet. What qualities could you tell him you had, that would hopefully make him consider you worthy?

To make sure you don't feel stupid doing this, I'll happily tell you mine -

I'm: reasonably clever, a fast-thinker, methodical, intuitive, perceptive, funny, I have a lovely voice, pretty eyes, I'm honest, fun, a good friend, caring.

(That's about it for me - I have a much longer list of bad points though, including being judgemental, lazy, impatient, intolerant and selfish lol.)

(if you don't feel comfortable doing this, I understand.)

Love Rachel x

posted May 05, 2011 06:07 PM            

true, i am selfish, but only healthily so....i'm very willing to give whatever i can if i have it to give...i just wish the ones that have always been the closest to me would stop seeing me as so selfish

i'm also unnaturally possessive of my room and possessions...i dont allow anyone in my room without permission and you will hear it from me if you happen to enter my room without my knowledge...i dont care if it was an emergency and my bathroom was closer

------------------
What happens on Venus stays on Venus

posted May 06, 2011 04:45 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ami Anne:
I am gonna write things that I like.I like myself when I am strong.
I like myself when I can be me even if you think I am weird.That is a big one cuz I used to have all sorts of fun being a wack-o and laughing later

---

I think your 'weird' side is great; you often post in a unique way - and that's great! So many people copy another's style, jump on the bandwagon with expressions etc, but it takes a really cool person to be able to stand out there with their own style and show it to the world. Without realising it, that's what you do - and its wonderful. The little red hearts in your posts, the way you are always so sweet to people and sometimes call them Darling, the way you sometimes answer something in short posts rather than one long one, how you'll always put a note in a topic to say you're thinking and will come back to it later, so no-one feels ignored or like you don't care - all of that makes you unique - I'd know a post was from you even if the usernames were blanked out. That is a pretty big 'good point' to have, I think and shows a healthy but not showy confidence in yourself that I'm sure so many people would love to have. Good for you!

Keep talking, keep being yourself and you'll eventually find the love for yourselves that those around you already have for you.

Love Rachel x