posted April 23, 2012 10:26 AM            

No you are not one of "those."

My original post was a situation where atleast 2 very capable men chose to live at home, while the other was likely milking the situation.

I do really understand where there are needed times, and thank goodness for those of they who have family they can lean on!

Just makes me question a bit when one is able to live by themselves, financially, and there is no need to live at home, but they do anyway.

I understand different strokes for different folks, but, personally I would never be capable-bodied, mind, etc. and make a concious decision to live with my mother or grandpa.

I love my freedom, individuality and personal space, and unless I was destitute, it is not a choice for me, was just trying to understand why the 3 men in my situation chose to do so, which I edited cause so many were getting ofended, etc.

posted April 23, 2012 11:31 AM            

I want to have my own place/space - I don't like dependency. I can see why some might not mind the living arrangement if they have the means to get away when stressed, and if they just enjoy each others' company.

posted April 23, 2012 04:28 PM            

The first post, which got so misunderstood, why I edited, was to gain opinions on 3 individuals, brothers I know, one being my 45 year old boyfriend, 3 brothers, two gainfully employed and able to live on their own, but choose not to, the 3rd is just a codependent.

I just wanted opinions on these individuals cause, like I said, not in a million years would I do so unless absolutely needed to.

And their mom is 75, drives, works and totally functional.

I will say one thing regarding my bfriend, who has never had a place of his own till now, at 45, but has been very gainfully employed all of his life, and that is that before I even meet up with him, and we even continue with this relationship once he goes home (Southern Ohio from Southern Texas), it will not be till he has his own place.

thanks again, all!!!

posted April 23, 2012 04:33 PM            

Sure everybody falls on hard times, and that is not what this thread was intended to be.

I, at 50 years old, have always been very independent, left home at 19, never went back, always found a way, and I have not been in a position to make money till I gained my RN at 39 years old.

posted April 23, 2012 06:50 PM            

I know several people the same age as me that are still living at home and can't get there act together.

I also know people who are living at home who are also trying to work themselves up from entry level positions in there field.

The problem is if there just "milking there parents" by staying at home its a bad thing, but if there trying to improve themselves that's a different story.

Me and my sister have this debate all the time, she left home at 17.

I'm still at home trying to finish my second degree.

My sister argues that its better to leave home, however she has massive debt and is always in need of financial assistance from my parents and its getting tough for her to stay competitive with her degree.

I finished my first degree, earned some experience in my field and realized I would need to do more schooling just to stay competitive that would be either a masters or a second major.

My background is Asian so my mother is okay with me staying at home provided that I get as much education as I can and I look after her once she is fully retired.

The bottom line is its becoming increasingly competitive you need an undergrad just to get into a professional job + a masters or a second major, compared to 20yrs ago you just needed a high school diploma.

A lot of the bureaucrats I've worked with in the government still only hold a high school diploma. To get the same jobs they had you need at least an undergrad.

To add insult to injury, add the costs of education and the fact that as North America declines(Canada & US) to Asia and South America. Jobs are going to become increasingly competitive.

I can't speak so much about US because I don't live there and I can't make an informed opinion just by listening to the news.

But, right now Canada isn't a knowledge based economy. Canada is a resource based economy and that has effects on other industries and what types of jobs are available.

The only survivors are grads with so-so education with lots of experience in there field or grads with lots of education and so-so experience.

I forgot to add a lot of the grads are also becoming less creative for example an art history grad has determined there degree is useless.

Another art history grad decides to start there own business offering painting lessons.