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Author
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Topic: why all the fuss about having your own place?
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aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 4749
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 03, 2012 11:23 PM
  
i notice that people look down on others who live at home with their parents after high school, why is that? the way the economic climate is right now its probably wiser to live with family. i'm 21 and still live with my mom , so what? i have all the independence that the cool kids with their crappy apartments have, plus i save money. i work 2 jobs so i could have my own place if i wanted, but its not a priority at the moment. i prefer staying at home and having more money to do fun stuff with over living in an apartment and eating ramen noodles every night. why is living with family frowned upon? IP: Logged |
sand
Knowflake Posts: 7623
From: In the garden of evil
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 04, 2012 12:09 AM
I own my 1 place. My family lives with me. A bit of a burden but not really much I can do. I suppose I should just accept responsibility. I live with my dad now, different place. Since may until my new apartment finishes 2013 I think. I would prefer being broke and the ramen noodles. I have my looks and independence. The world is mine.  It's not customary here for anyone to move out unless they marry but I don't think it's happening for me anytime soon so I got my own place. I'm very minimalist. Austere. I don't need a lot just good basics. It's not so hard if u for go some of the comforts. It's the family routine I am uncomfortable with. I don't enjoy relaxing Sunday lunches, or playing board games, and church.. I'm actually sick of it. Nice at first but I prefer my dark ways. Brooding in my Italian black leather sofa. I also do not want anything imposed on me. Obligations to attend things are a big deal for me. Am much older than u tho, 28. At 21 I was abroad sharing an apartment with someone. i loved how stylishly decrepit it was.  Tuna cans for me. Not ramen noodles. IP: Logged |
RedScorp
Knowflake Posts: 4246
From: GMT-5
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted December 04, 2012 12:16 AM
^Wow sand that's pretty mucH ME! Opposites, are somewhat similar in the end, hm?Ahem, a merit of you no longer depending on and burdening your parents. The optimal age to move out is supposed to be 21 any ways. Any earlier, it can affect your success (unable to handle the load). Living on your own is kinda like a success thing. After 21, it can be seen as disappointing because you've had a few years to be prepare to function in society, but you still can't. Then it's like, "Well, what's your malfunction? Why can you not become independent?" IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 4749
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 04, 2012 12:29 AM
thats the thing though... i'm just as independent as somebody who lives on their own. i have 2 jobs so i have my own money, i come and go as i please. lots of times i have the house all to myself and help pay some of the bills so i'm by no means a bum. IP: Logged |
sand
Knowflake Posts: 7623
From: In the garden of evil
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 04, 2012 12:50 AM
^who would ur mom live with too right? Fix stuff I suppose. IP: Logged |
RedScorp
Knowflake Posts: 4246
From: GMT-5
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted December 04, 2012 12:55 AM
Get your own home...then have your mom move in with you! "I live with my mom" becomes "my mom lives with me". Much more respectable.  IP: Logged |
sand
Knowflake Posts: 7623
From: In the garden of evil
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 04, 2012 01:01 AM
I would say privacy is huge with me as well. I know now my sexual habits would be criticized by family. I am never keen on talking about relationships. I get tongue tied. IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 7466
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2012 01:59 AM
nevermind.  Glad it's not a big deal aquaguy. Hang in there and do what's best for you. Don't worry too much about what other people think.IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 7466
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2012 02:14 AM
There are good and bad points to living on your own. It's just a huge responsibility. I'd rather have a family there to help out until I could afford a down payemnt on my own house.Living on your own, with or without roommates is not all its cracked up to be. When people give you sh!t for it, just be smug and realize how lucky you really are. IP: Logged |
SunChild
Moderator Posts: 3514
From: Australia
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2012 02:16 AM
I envy those people. One of my friends still has her home at her parents and can afford to travel because of this (she is 28.) I was renting from sixteen onwards and only lived back home for a few months one time, it was temporary. I worked and studied full time to support myself. I would have liked to stay at home a little longer and put cash away, but I was not given that opportunity, but if you have that, good on you, use it wisely and to your advantage. It's a wild world for sure so the more preparation you get the better off you would be, even if it means staying at home. What I don't get is the lazy ones who sit around all day at home at 30 still. That's probably not what you are talking about. It can be a blessing. IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 7466
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2012 02:28 AM
IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 7466
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2012 02:34 AM
quote:
What I don't get is the lazy ones who sit around all day at home at 30 still.
Yes, as long as you are not still there (especially if it's in their basement) at 30 years old, spending most of your time online, then youre doing alright. IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 4749
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted December 04, 2012 03:32 AM
lol of course i plan to get my own place in a few years but i'm content at home for now.IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 7466
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2012 04:00 AM
Well, then what's the problem? Just say that to people.If they don't understand it then they're idiots or jealous! IP: Logged |
teasel
Knowflake Posts: 4945
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2012 04:26 AM
quote:
Originally posted by T:
Yes, as long as you are not still there (especially if it's in their basement) at 30 years old, spending most of your time online, then youre doing alright.
See, this is what I've been so ashamed of, only I've been stuck, I've also realized that I could have gone back to England for a while (family, friends, public transport, etc). And I'm past 30 now- have been for a while. Though I'm not in the basement.  And it's hurt me what with things going on this year. IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 7466
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2012 04:37 AM
IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 7466
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2012 06:09 AM
Just wrote you, teasel. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 38548
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted December 04, 2012 06:31 AM
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
lol of course i plan to get my own place in a few years but i'm content at home for now.
For anyone, the hardest thing is to accept oneself. Once you do, no one has any power over you in that thing, anymore. You can just laugh. I see that with myself. Some things I accept and some I don't. People will harass you with the things you don't accept about yourself  ------------------
Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
sand
Knowflake Posts: 7623
From: In the garden of evil
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 04, 2012 10:16 AM
Things I miss living alone. Exercising in your underwear. Yes in front of big a$$ mirror. Things I miss living alone with somebody else. Wash the dishes sex. Do the laundry sex. Take out the garbage se.. Ok I never got that! the nooner that lasts till u have dinner reservations. Le sigh.. Things I miss living with people/ roommates. Their weirdness. That anything could happen on a Friday night. In terms of family, the meals. Definitely better food than when it is just me. I prefer listing the good stuff. IP: Logged |
ghanima81
Moderator Posts: 1043
From: Maine
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2012 12:35 PM
I think it's a trend to stay at home now a days. Most people seem to be choosing a school closer to home and commuting. I think it makes perfect sense. The economy sucks, working AND school to pay for a crappy apartment OR for your parents to have to pay for your dorm at college is worse IMO. Living with a fun group is cool, cuts back on rent and bills, and is very common in cities where the rents are INSANELY high. Whatever floats your boat, I guess. I personally won't mind having my mom live with me someday. (I own a home but have a roommate that lives with me and my daughter). I can keep an eye on her as she gets older, and that extra person around feels nice. I don't really like being alone. I love my independence, but I'm a pretty social creature. IP: Logged |
SaturnineMoth
Knowflake Posts: 358
From: Saturn 9
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted December 04, 2012 02:58 PM
quote:
Originally posted by T:
Yes, as long as you are not still there (especially if it's in their basement) at 30 years old, spending most of your time online, then youre doing alright.
--- ^ my husband? lmao This was supposed to be a temporary solution to us having our son so young and unprepared -- we had lived in a really tiny apartment when I first came to Canada. He had explained that he lived on his own to begin with - but of course, the truth is he never lived away... we didn't even have the luxury of having the basement apartment until his little brother's family moved out on their own... they were here for 3 years saving~ we've been living with his parents for the past 6 solid. And, I hate it. (but as it is - with going from illegal alien to permanent resident now I had no way to fix the situation. Had to go along with his way... which means their ways~ which are very bizarre to me at times. ESP with those family obligations, and religious distinctions...) --- nono, you're good to stay at home and save money I say~ enjoy life's pleasures while you are young and free. But, always plan ahead, and for the unexpected. I had all the extremes - my family is weird itself - I'd been supporting myself with all but board from age 14 on, I paid rent to my mother after turning 16... in my senior year of high school paying for everything was my responsibility - my own bills, rent, food, and fun... and saving. Lots of responsibility... then I moved out of the family home and shared a house with a friend... not a good experience there either though, as she constantly let her friends steal from me. Real bad news there... but I was still able to save and do all my own young and foolish stuff plus hold responsibility. Then, I moved in with my exbf at 19... we had a large apartment together with lots of animals, his kids came often~ and voila - a homemaker in training... still having to work, save, and support myself. It's not impossible --- but, I wish I could have had a little more time to A) do those fun kid things and be a little irresponsible and B) saved up more for my dream house --- instead I ended up there for 4 years... when we broke up - I went back home - I continued my education, and worked constantly... I didn't have to pay my mother so much as earlier though, because she wanted me home. --- And, at 22 I moved here.... which puts me in the basement of /his/ parent's home (which don't get me wrong, is a very nice place, spacey and all), but under their rules, and there's absolutely no privacy... we can't even argue --- god forbid we fight~ yet my in-laws are constantly at it.... >.< I think it's perfectly fine to stay home with your parents... long as you are thinking of the future too Aquaguy. It's much more acceptable, and economical, given the state of the rather unstable job market around the nation now anyway... Hold dear to your savings, but sure... enjoy the freedom from other responsibilities too. There'll be lots of time to be independent, and live on ramen in the future anyway... (I always had savings... never lived on ramen or tuna... must be all the Earth influence.) - best believe I'm getting the hell outta this basement before I'm 30 though~!!! hah! --- I can finally "officially" work in Canada - hurrah! I got my PR card in the mail yesterday!  *over the moon* (but still sick tho)  win/lose
------------------
You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.
-SGC IP: Logged |
sand
Knowflake Posts: 7623
From: In the garden of evil
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 04, 2012 03:18 PM
^i actually really like tuna lol! I even order it. The belly. IP: Logged |
Aquacheeka
Knowflake Posts: 2078
From: Toronto
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted December 04, 2012 03:18 PM
Aqua stellium. Independence is imperative. Living with my parents = aw HELL no!IP: Logged |
Aquacheeka
Knowflake Posts: 2078
From: Toronto
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted December 04, 2012 03:21 PM
My boyfriend lives with his parents still. I tease him about it, but not relentlessly . He DID live on his own/with roommates for two years. At least I know he's capable of being independent. Big turnoff if they're not.IP: Logged |
Aquacheeka
Knowflake Posts: 2078
From: Toronto
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted December 04, 2012 03:21 PM
My boyfriend lives with his parents still. I tease him about it, but not relentlessly . He DID live on his own/with roommates for two years. At least I know he's capable of being independent. Big turnoff if they're not.IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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