Author
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Topic: Ladies? 30's and up? DRIVE???
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future_uncertain Knowflake Posts: 248 From: Registered: May 2009
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posted July 29, 2011 12:00 PM
Okay, so I'm approaching 35 this year and I don't know what my issue is, but I find myself mentally (bleep!)ing almost every guy who crosses my path lately. That was maybe blunt, and I'm not going for crass, but there's no other way to describe this "thing."I've heard that a female's sex drive goes up in her mid-thirties, but all the research I'm finding points to reasons like she's more comfortable with her body, better able to achieve orgasm, blah blah blah... I don't think these are my reasons. (I spoke with my husband about it and he says now I know how it feels to be a thirteen year old boy!) :P I've always had a strong sex drive, but now I'm essentially obsessed or something. Anyone? Because I feel like a pedophile when I check out the college-aged life guard at the pool. (But he's totally smoking hot with his whistle and aviators!) <<< See? Gross! I'm not into 20 year olds!! And it doesn't stop there-- men in their 50's, 60's, all of them! I've never been trampy, although I've definitely had my share of the stuff, so I don't think it's a repression thing. It's kind of funny, but also not because it's distracting and also making for some weird moments with male friends and acquaintances. Like I have to stop myself from hitting on everyone. So... just wondering. Is this really a thing? When will it be safe to let myself back out of the basement? IP: Logged |
LEXX Moderator Posts: 6597 From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 29, 2011 01:24 PM
You are perfectly normal!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PS. as long as they are over 18 do not feel weird about it. I mean eye candy is eye candy! And as long as your looking is not harming your marriage, then enjoy! ------------------ ~I remember, therefore I am immortal~LEXX ~Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other." ~ Dalai Lama }><}('>~ IP: Logged |
NickiG Moderator Posts: 3970 From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann Registered: Jul 2010
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posted July 29, 2011 01:29 PM
now i know why the woman i babysit for cheated on her husband with just about every guy you can think of...shes in her mid 30s, bisexual, bipolar and cant control herself------------------ I once saw a sign that said "sin is death" but if "all deaths are suicide (linda goodman)" and suicide is sin, then shouldnt "death is sin" be more appropriate? when organic is used to describe food then you know we have come to a dark age in history IP: Logged |
LEXX Moderator Posts: 6597 From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 29, 2011 01:51 PM
I remember hitting my 30s and omg my libido went zooooom! Unfortunately I did not get the satisfaction I needed physically from spouse at the time....boring....and came to rely on "technology" Oh I looked, oh my yes! But nowadays just not worth the risk to indulge those rampant urges with others. However; my libido and urges have become many times stronger since my 30s! Maybe all these decades of mostly solo pleasuring has made me more in tune with my body, the orgasms are way better, multiples, and even though 56 and very overweight, I feel more a sexual person than when younger. Even though disabled, on my good body moments I take time to give myself pleasures. It keeps me from being a leering letch when the body is satisfied. I have told young men, take care of your urges solo, before a date, it will help you think with your brain not your genitals. Nothing wrong with looking! What you do after the looking is where it can get out of control. At the moment I have a person of focus for my urges, and that suffices for now even though I am going it solo in the physical. I think women get more sexual after 30ish and continue until they are very old. It is society who does not see us as sexual beings after certain ages. Well I am a very sexual being and will continue to enjoy being one!
------------------ ~I remember, therefore I am immortal~LEXX ~Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other." ~ Dalai Lama }><}('>~ IP: Logged |
LEXX Moderator Posts: 6597 From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 29, 2011 02:04 PM
quote: Originally posted by NickiG: now i know why the woman i babysit for cheated on her husband with just about every guy you can think of...shes in her mid 30s, bisexual, bipolar and cant control herself
She needed/needs to relieve herself more often to keep from going wild with others. I seriously can relate to those omg over intense urges for sexual satisfaction!!!!!!!! I even went to doctors asking them to give me a "turn off" pill. They all laughed at me. I was serious! I do not know if all women become sexually rabid after 30ish, but I know I did and it is not letting up. Sigh It would be easier with an off switch for such. However if I avoid sexual release too long, then I dream them, and wake to omg orgasms! So might as well avail myself of technology until I can have the right lover for myself. Not interested in sex for sex sake with others. (oh I get the offers from 18 year olds to 78 year olds! LOL! Not interested, tell them sorry no, lots of horny men out there and LOL a few women too!LOL!) It is simply just not worth the dangers and dramas. I take care of myself in that arena quite well, avoiding the dangers, dramas, and messes. ------------------ ~I remember, therefore I am immortal~LEXX ~Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other." ~ Dalai Lama }><}('>~ IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 16464 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted July 29, 2011 02:25 PM
quote: Originally posted by NickiG: now i know why the woman i babysit for cheated on her husband with just about every guy you can think of...shes in her mid 30s, bisexual, bipolar and cant control herself
IP: Logged |
future_uncertain Knowflake Posts: 248 From: Registered: May 2009
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posted July 29, 2011 05:00 PM
Ew, Nicki-- that's not good. Sounds like she had a whole slew of issues. Fortunately, I feel like I'm in reasonable control of mine. (Perhaps with the exception of wanting to lounge around in bed all day thinking about sex instead of mopping the floors.) LEXX-- thanks for sharing your experiences! You're right: there's no harm in looking and I don't intend to act on anything. I have been a little more forward lately with men, and they with me, it seems, even when I haven't been outspoken. Must be a vibe I'm giving off. I've been very sexual for as long as I can remember-- even as a little girl, even though I have no history of sexual abuse. I can't remember not being able to have an orgasm. So this sudden spike has me a little confused! At least I'm married to a guy with whom I can share these feelings and act on them. (That is, when I can get Mr. Virgo to forget about work and put down the laptop!) IP: Logged |
LEXX Moderator Posts: 6597 From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 29, 2011 06:08 PM
future_uncertain ------------------ ~I remember, therefore I am immortal~LEXX ~Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other." ~ Dalai Lama }><}('>~ IP: Logged |
lechien Knowflake Posts: 1246 From: my 30 cubic square meter room with a rat! Registered: May 2009
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posted July 29, 2011 06:41 PM
wow, i'm 33 and my sex-addiction (almost) died since 1 year ago or something. something is wrong with me...especially that i never thought it would be possible for me to go on living without obsessing sexually. i'm quite sound and alive without it. IP: Logged |
future_uncertain Knowflake Posts: 248 From: Registered: May 2009
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posted July 29, 2011 09:35 PM
Lechien Maybe it's just all this crazy heat we've been having this summer? IP: Logged |
NickiG Moderator Posts: 3970 From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann Registered: Jul 2010
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posted July 29, 2011 11:21 PM
quote: Originally posted by Ami Anne:
i know, but sadly its true she has like 2 boyfriends right now i think, but split up with her husband...she often tells my mom about past escapades with her brother in law and on and on ------------------ I once saw a sign that said "sin is death" but if "all deaths are suicide (linda goodman)" and suicide is sin, then shouldnt "death is sin" be more appropriate? when organic is used to describe food then you know we have come to a dark age in history IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 16464 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted July 30, 2011 09:28 AM
Wow Nicki Do any of the men help her self esteem IP: Logged |
NickiG Moderator Posts: 3970 From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann Registered: Jul 2010
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posted July 30, 2011 09:32 AM
quote: Originally posted by Ami Anne: Wow Nicki Do any of the men help her self esteem
i have no idea, LOL....thats not something she talks to me about ------------------ I once saw a sign that said "sin is death" but if "all deaths are suicide (linda goodman)" and suicide is sin, then shouldnt "death is sin" be more appropriate? when organic is used to describe food then you know we have come to a dark age in history IP: Logged |
lechien Knowflake Posts: 1246 From: my 30 cubic square meter room with a rat! Registered: May 2009
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posted July 30, 2011 10:02 AM
quote: Originally posted by future_uncertain: Lechien Maybe it's just all this crazy heat we've been having this summer?
WHAT crazy heat!?!?! where i am, it's raining non-stop and we all wear jackets and i'm almost tempted to turn on the heater! i'm so envious, are you in the States? i heard you guys have a heat wave going on. i hope next year i'll be re-located to a place where there's a real summer... ugh. IP: Logged |
pixelpixie Knowflake Posts: 347 From: ON Canada Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 30, 2011 10:04 AM
Oh F_U How are we so much alike? It's just weird.I know we're the same age, and I want to rub up against everybody. hahahaha I am an outrageous flirt too. I'm like "Did I just say that? Why Yes, I did!" I don't know what it is either. Maybe I have always been like this, but it feels....more. IP: Logged |
NickiG Moderator Posts: 3970 From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann Registered: Jul 2010
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posted July 30, 2011 10:11 AM
quote: Originally posted by lechien: WHAT crazy heat!?!?! where i am, it's raining non-stop and we all wear jackets and i'm almost tempted to turn on the heater! i'm so envious, are you in the States? i heard you guys have a heat wave going on. i hope next year i'll be re-located to a place where there's a real summer... ugh.
we do have a crazy heat here...we've been breaking record highs...and its bordering 100 degrees in my area, and that never happens ------------------ I once saw a sign that said "sin is death" but if "all deaths are suicide (linda goodman)" and suicide is sin, then shouldnt "death is sin" be more appropriate? when organic is used to describe food then you know we have come to a dark age in history IP: Logged |
lechien Knowflake Posts: 1246 From: my 30 cubic square meter room with a rat! Registered: May 2009
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posted July 30, 2011 02:38 PM
raaagh, i heard our city is the coldest in Europe... WHYYYY??? we have like 14-17 degrees (57-62 f) but feels worse because it's been pouring rain literally non-stop, what's wrong with the weather??again, i'm 33 and i'm comfortably in my grandma phase. i hope it's over soon though, while strangely i don't miss sexual intimacy AT ALL (that's wrong!!!), i'd be alarmed if i have lost my libido completely. out of all the strange places i've had sex, i still haven't tried the most classic one, in a car. until i have car sex, no i cannot grow old yet!! IP: Logged |
lechien Knowflake Posts: 1246 From: my 30 cubic square meter room with a rat! Registered: May 2009
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posted July 30, 2011 02:40 PM
oh, but i just had to add that this morning i had a super hot lesbian sex dream. good to know my mind is still *alive*.IP: Logged |
ghanima81 Moderator Posts: 692 From: Maine Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 31, 2011 12:11 AM
Just turned 30 in January. Always been a sexual, yet repressed person. Like, Hmmmm I enjoy this so much, but I feel like it's wrong so... Odd that. Not even raised religoiusly. Must be that 10th house Venus in Capricorn? Hmm...Anyway, had a relationship for about 4 months, first one since my split last summer, and OMFG the drive I had/have is insatiable. Although, I could take it or leave it from an actual person. And it can be quelled with an amazing conversation about classical guitar or gardening. Yeah, weird aquarian energies at play there. BUT, I feel the most empowered and confident that I've ever felt sexually. Like, "oh hel/ yes boy, you WISH you had this." OMG. Blushing to have said that. IP: Logged |
LEXX Moderator Posts: 6597 From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 31, 2011 01:08 AM
To everyone! : ------------------ ~I remember, therefore I am immortal~LEXX ~Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other." ~ Dalai Lama }><}('>~ IP: Logged |
PixieJane Knowflake Posts: 46 From: CA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted August 01, 2011 08:51 PM
I thought some would find this interesting: http://articles.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/2011-06-11/man-woman/28 360162_1_gay-men-orgasm-sexual-behaviour It's general sex lives for those in their 20s, 30s, and 40s (both straight & gay). I don't know about the age thing myself, but I've heard from others (women only) that their sex drive rocketed in their 30s. And oddly, I know someone who was asexual until she was in her 50s... IP: Logged |
GypseeWind Moderator Posts: 5417 From: Love Street, she lingers long on Love Street.. Registered: May 2009
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posted August 02, 2011 12:13 AM
I can relate... I hit 37 and was whacked on the head with some kind of hormone stick and it won't stop beating me. lol.I didn't read the links (sorry if I repeat anything!) but, my opinion on this is partly what Lexx said, or has said before in that as we age, we learn our bodies and what they are capable of, much more than what we knew when we were younger, AND for me, it's like in the younger years I was so busy having children, that sex was the last thing on my mind. (figure that one, eh?) No, but really, I mean, I did it for my spouse and of course there were days I did enjoy it, but I was so dang tired.. Then the kids got older and I felt more like myself and everything just sort of ripened.! It's our reward for putting up with so much when we were younger. IP: Logged |
hippichick Moderator Posts: 741 From: Registered: May 2009
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posted August 02, 2011 10:48 AM
For me, it was around 40, I am 49 now.Maybe it was later for me due to my high Aqua influence, esp Mars in Aqua, but now....ooolala! OR maybe now it is cause my boyfriend has a Mars in Scorpio,oolala,oolala IP: Logged |
GypseeWind Moderator Posts: 5417 From: Love Street, she lingers long on Love Street.. Registered: May 2009
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posted August 02, 2011 03:11 PM
LOL @ Hippichick, so that's where ya been! IP: Logged |
LEXX Moderator Posts: 6597 From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 02, 2011 04:39 PM
quote: Originally posted by hippichick: For me, it was around 40, I am 49 now.Maybe it was later for me due to my high Aqua influence, esp Mars in Aqua, but now....ooolala! OR maybe now it is cause my boyfriend has a Mars in Scorpio,oolala,oolala
------------------ ~I remember, therefore I am immortal~LEXX ~Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other." ~ Dalai Lama }><}('>~ IP: Logged |