posted August 05, 2011 08:02 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by GypseeWind:
Leichen;
I'm sorry to hear about your Mom's condition.
May I ask a personal question? If you do not wish to answer, I won't take it personally.
Did your Mom grow up in poverty or in a large family in which nothing much was her very own, and also, do you know if her parents provided adequate affection to her?

I ask because the person I was speaking about with the pic above, grew up in a large family. They were pretty poor, and his mother was very un-affectionate.
I think his shopoholic-ness is directly linked to this things.

And thank you for the link on the Collyer brothers, I am going to watch that tonight.

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Gypsee, actually no, her family was quite well-off because both of her parents had jobs, and she only has a younger sister. but something was wrong or went wrong and she developed very sceptical nature, which is part of her Borderline symptoms. lack of affection in the household certain does have something to do with it though. very sad indeed.

posted August 06, 2011 03:13 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by juniperb:
I`ve watched the program and it sickened me. I saw the one on hoarding animals, cats, rats and one on rabbits the other on chickens..
I was torn between watching and shutting it off.
The horrid abuse of the critters shouldn`t even be on t.v.. it was so heartbreaking for the hoarder too because they actually believe they are providing for their animals needs and the animals are fullfilling their needs..

I don`t understand compulsions so I can`t speak of them but it must be one awful depressing and painful disease. For all involved.

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It makes me sad and disgusted when people hoard animals. It saddens me that people hoard period, but when they bring in animals and think they are doing well...damn, it is really horrifying. I would love to adopt all the sad and homeless animals but it isn't feasible. To me, animals shouldn't be confined in an area that could kill them or in a place where they can't receive love.

Animal hoarders mean well but like object / clutter hoarders, they harm more than they help.

Then again..sometimes we see "children" hoarders.. you know what I mean? The people that have more and more kids that they can afford and the poor kids suffer.

posted August 10, 2011 01:42 AM            

BUT< there are other clutter alternatives.
Like one person I read about takes the baby clothes, and blankets, and cloth goods that we keep from having children, and she tears them into strips and does the coolest weaving/quilting technique to them.

posted August 10, 2011 09:29 PM            

And she said that she knew if she had a hoarder looking house that no one would bother steeling her stuff.

She ended up getting professional help and can SOMETIMES get rid of A FEW THINGS.

Another man got bullied so bad for being gay, that he liked having all this STUFF to surround him and protect him.

posted August 10, 2011 10:03 PM            

God, I am such a magazine junkie. I love female magazines. Cosmopolitan, Glamor, Self, Cosmopolitan UK, Seventeen...and more!

I wish I could get all of them in the mail.

They come in handy for vision boards. And make up is hobby of mine. I'm so glad that I saved all my magazines. It all started with cosmogirl (rip they went out of business)

So one day, I got a binder cut out all the makeup ideas put them into paper protectors, into a binder. I have almost 5 binders full.

But I realize if I want to keep getting more, and more, AND MORE. Magazines that I need to be able to get rid of some. Other wise there will be everywhere some day...EVERYWHERE! Can you imagine me 10 years from now gettin many many MANY more magazine and still having all the mags around that I've had since 1999!? That is just plain psychotic, and a death trap waiting to happen.

And now that I got all the make up tips cut out of the magazines...whats the point of keeping em?! I'm gonna get new magazines in the mail anyway.
I plan on donating a few to the YMCA that I work at. I know that when I'm there and have nothing to do it's nice to see a magazine there that aren't about parenting. lol

and slowly start putting some in the recycle bin.

posted August 10, 2011 11:01 PM            

Stawr, I'm also a magazine junkie! I've let all my subscriptions lapse and now I get my materials from the library. I'm really bad about keeping my borrowed items past their due dates, but I like to think that my fines are supporting a good cause.

posted August 11, 2011 01:16 AM            

I even cut a swatch of a piece of my son's favorite bug jammies that were in tatters from washing and snuggling, and stapled that into the journal.
Now I can still touch it, but I don't have to lug around a 2 peice ripped jammie set.

I have serious journals as well, for sketches and paintings, but this one is great for ticket stubs and just little doo-dads.. cause if I was to become a hoarder, it would be paper, I am sure!

If you watch this video and peruse through into some more of them, you will see cool things to do with magazine photo cutouts (stawr) and even typed pages. They make great backgrounds to paint and collage over so that you don't have to buy alot of that scrapbook paper, or waste alot of paint saturating your paper.

On a serious note, I wonder if it sort of feels symbolic of going back to the womb, do you think? Like with the guy mentioned above who was bullied about being gay? Maybe the mounds of stuff are like a womb, and they just go further and further in to avoid the outside world and it's harshness??

posted November 14, 2011 04:50 PM            

If my daughter has ever made or bought me anything I keep it. I have a desk drawer and closet full. I'll probably never get rid of any of it. Anything else, I get rid of easily.

posted November 14, 2011 06:56 PM            

My mom has a good job.
She has a very hard time getting rid of things, it's almost impossible.
She is very busy.
She will do basic chores like laundry and dishes.
But we still have her stuff cluttering up our house.
A lot of people on her side of the family have issues with keeping a place nice.

So I wonder is it because she doesn't know what she is doing? Or the having a hard time getting rid of stuff. I bet its BOTH.

My sister has suggested that she gets a maid. And mom says she is to embarrassed to even hire a maid.
That doesn't make any sense! If we hire a maid she would only have to be embarrassed once...and usually when we know someone is stopping by we actually tidy up.

Normal people like me are not concerned about that...but are concerned over things like the maid stealing your stuff.

Like mom acts like she wants our house to improve...but she actually doesn't. It's annoying.

posted November 14, 2011 08:00 PM            

But my dad doesn't know how to deal with my mom's borderline hoarding.

Which is why he drinks all the time?
My mom told me that he use to make mean comments about it.

But my mom was freaking out when she had to be at work and purple heart was coming. She feared that dad would get rid of more things.

Luckily for my mom, dad has been busy helping Grandma move to her new apartment. We have grandma's table now. So dad told me and mom the day it was comming to get our (mostly mom's) stuff out of the way.

My sister ended up popping over to help. My mom wasn't expecting that. Mom was embarrassed. You know your house has gone to **** when your to embarrassed for one of your own kids to see it.

And my sister was kinda a stickler. Like why do you have all these CD players. Mom would say things like maybe I should feed the dog. And my sister would say things like I don't think so. lol and then I would make smart butt comments like Ha I knew you where going to say that. And then I wanted to throw I ticket from a play I was in, in the trash...And mom tried to grab it out of my hand. And then said "lets just stop cleaning!" My sister couldn't keep it in anymore. "I'm disappointed in you, the house gets worse every year"

And then when my sister left. My mom said how she was embarrassed. I don't remember exactly how she worded this but...it was like how she was pretty much saying that it's not okay for my sister to see our house, but it's okay for me?! Oh wait she said she didn't want my sister help but wanted mine.
I'm thinking 'that's f()cked up you crazy stupid b!tch. You don't want my sister's help cause she knows what she is doing! If you really wanted help you would except it, even if it is embarrassing!'

posted November 14, 2011 08:16 PM            

So I am able to get rid of stuff easier than my mom. I get sick useless things taking up space in my room. Sadly my mom doesn't always let me rid of MY OWN THINGS. I've tried just throwing things away too, she has on a few occasions pulled stuff out of the trash and put it back in my room.

I recently got rid of a few of my old teenage clothes and then my mom says wait I might want some of these. She even pulled out one of my old purple halter tops. I really realized there that she does have a psychological problem, that other people can't even get rid of their stuff. But then one day I made fun of her for that. So she let me get rid of my purple halter top.

posted November 22, 2011 02:15 PM            

My sister called me today on her break crying.
Because my sisters husband's grandma has no where to go for thanks giving.

My sister has had this talk with my mom before a few weeks ago. (names have been changed) "Florence has no where to go for thanksgiving this year...and I wont bring her over here because it's too embarrassing."

Well today at work, my sister's husband who I will call jr. called her and said that he invited Florence over to my parents house (where I live too) for thanks giving.
So yeah my sister is freaking out.

Like having Florence over is not an option at all.

Something is up with my mom.
My dad is working his ass off around here. I mean yeah he has the time off...since he is on unemployment. But I am proud of my dad for never being lazy...you know how easy, and tempting it is for other types of people to just sit on their ass and not do anything?

Dad has redid our kitchen and is working on the upstairs bathroom now...

Most of the crap cluttering up our house is mom's.

I used this whole weekend to get my bedroom in shape...some deep cleaning I tell you...went though jewelry and my hair stuff and got rid of some other things...Like some of the the hair stuff was my older sisters...like the **** load of headbands and the scunchis(I usually only make time to put clothes away.) I'm like half way there, and whether I have the energy or not I have to finish tonight after work. Cause relatives from out of state are coming tomorrow.

Let me tell you from what I've observed my mom hasn't done anything at all yet.

I feel like she is using church to avoid reality. (no disrespect to anyone of faith...I know lots of you are good, while some give it a bad name)

My mom works, then she will spend the rest of her time being involved in church activities. Most people only go once a week unless they are retired or something.

But my mom just never has time to deal with her mess around the house.
Example: Yesterday she worked all day. Did some church activity and got home around 10...then tapped on her PDA, then went to bed.

Like how do you tell someone that they are selfish for going to church all the time, and therefore not having time to deal with their problems and messes ever?
My mom will probably act like someone telling her this is testing her faith or something.

I wonder if she purposely makes herself this busy...so she can have an excuse to leave the place a dump???
It's hard to imagine that she does it to keep people out? But that may just be the case.

My dad is trying really hard...and mom doesn't seem to care that much. She doesn't seem to care that much that other people can't visit cause of the way our house is...like is that what she secretly wants?

Anyway I can't believe it's that bad. I am trying to change my ways. And not be so much like my mom, and more like my dad and sister.

Oh and my mom gets that it's not my fault it's everyone else fault tone...when she gets confronted.

The irony is that my mom is a triple Virgo.

posted November 23, 2011 03:21 AM            

mine moved from a house to a condo unit. i cleaned(more like ordered people around) for a couple of weeks since i flew home for a funeral and had nothing to do anyway.

everything she owns is pretty much there except furniture coz she bought new stuff. i didn't tell her bout the boxes of stuff i gave away. i think i'm a fairly good editor and i think i assessed the stuff she actually needs or is of value pretty well. the things weren't in a mess too so it wasn't that hard.

she was looking for her crocs like a dozen of them the other day lol and i sed i gave them away coz they were ugly. hope i'm gone before she notices the other stuff missing lol! but that's the thing, she rarely does. i think i saw a hoarder show where they give back your stuff if you can remember them. also since i'm an only child if i'm not going to keep those things, nobody will.