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Author
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Topic: Unrelated to astrology complaint
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britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 16, 2011 10:41 PM
  
My husband recently started going to AA. (Yay!) He is doing great at it. The problem is that this woman in the AA meetings has a huge, obvious crush on him. During his first meeting, she stared at him very intensely throughout the entire meeting with a little coy smile on her face. She was heading the meeting, which was the really baffling part. I talked to my hubby about it, and he was giving her the benefit of the doubt, saying that she was probably staring at him a lot because she was interested in his sobriety. (HA!)During this meeting this evening, she came in a few minutes late. There was a huge space next to me at the table where she could have sit. A huge space, more than enough for one person to sit at. Instead, she drags a chair past me, and squeezes in at the corner of the table right next to my hubby! Of all the places! An awkward place to sit too, especially when you consider that there was such a huge space right next to me. I couldn't help it, I burst out laughing at this so obvious display. She seemed to flutter a little bit and moved her chair over to another spot. I glared at her menacingly throughout the entire meeting tonight (Scorpio Moon and Scorpio/Sagittarius ascendant. lol). She didn't make another false move. The gall! I am obviously pregnant, we have already told the group we are husband and wife. She knows this. What the hell is her problem??????????? Is it not extremely inappropriate of her as an AA sponsor and head of meetings to be flirting with not only a new member, but a married member with a pregnant wife, whose wife is sitting next to him? How do I deal with this? I am very tempted to confront her about it, but I am wondering how inappropriate that would be of ME. Any suggestions? IP: Logged |
LEXX
Moderator Posts: 7470
From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 16, 2011 10:47 PM
Keep going to the meetings with your husband.IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 16, 2011 10:49 PM
Yes, I am going to continue going to the meetings with him. I am asking how I should deal with this woman at the meetings. I am not getting everything I can out of them, and it is in turn affecting my husband as well. It's unfair of her to be behaving this way as we are there for the purpose of pursuing sobriety and wellness, NOT to have a threesome. I was distracted the whole meeting because a large part of my mind was on the lookout for some inappropriate behavior from her. Very stressful. Not how I would ideally spend these meetings.So how should I deal with this? IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 16, 2011 10:55 PM
My hubby is super cute and charismatic and has this sunshiney, happy, beautiful aura, but she CAN'T HAZ! =P
He's a Leo, and exhibits all the loveable Leo qualities.IP: Logged |
rajji
Knowflake Posts: 1171
From:
Registered: Jan 2011
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posted September 17, 2011 06:01 AM
I guess both of you should stop going to the meetings!Considering the fact that other women is the head of the association.
Prevention is better than cure in my opinion.
EDIT-Lol!! I dint realise this is sweet peas forum!
I was looking on astrology 2 and health and healing topics and suddenly happened get into here out of nowhere!IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 10:32 AM
I really want to confront her about it after the meeting, away from the other meeting-goers. I would use a calm approach, and be very to the point and strait forward about it. I'm NOT going to be p*ssed off "don't mess with my man!" lady. I realize that behaving that way would not put me in a favorable position. It's best to remain calm and use few words and make her feel like the uncomfortable one. Does anyone think that approaching her on this issue would be inappropriate, or should I just leave it?*** just a little side note... why are "grown up" words not allowed in the 18 and over message board? What is the point in that? IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 20421
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 10:42 AM
Dear Britterfly
I do not feel good about you approaching her.I feel very badly about it.I feel she has some game going on and she wants to escalate it by you getting embroiled. I hope you do not do it. ------------------
Do You Think This Psychic Is Cute?
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
dysfunctionalmystic
Moderator Posts: 787
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 10:54 AM
If she displays any more inappropriate behaviour I'd either give it to her in writing or tell her at the end of the meeting. Being a leo with a scorp asc I'd be highly likely to point out the offending behaviour. She's in a position of authority and whilst I understand that she is human she should still be expected to remain professional at all times during the meetings. If she displays unacceptable behaviour -tell her! You don't have to make it awkward and can use phrases like " I find it personally unacceptable that you seem to be flirting with my husband" or just ask her outright if there's a problem with you and your husband attending, ask her if he's triggered something in her that she's uncomfortable with, ask her if she feels that it's going to be difficult to maintain her professional boundaries with your husband (that'll p!ss her off). Try to approach it in a professional manner yourself, the more calm and detached you are about it - the harder it'll be for her to ignore you. The thing is, because of the nature of the group - the last thing you need to be dealing with is subconscious stuff from other members but to get it from the so called leader is just wrong. IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 10:54 AM
Thank you, Ami. I feel like she has some game going on as well. So how should I deal with this evil little wench, Ami? *frustrated*IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 11:04 AM
Dysfunctionalmystic, I like it! I was wondering exactly what I would say to her. I couldn't think of anything effective to say. I really like your idea of asking her if she is going to have problems maintaining ethical boundaries with my husband. I am thinking of just calmly telling her that we are going to the meetings to pursue sobriety (obviously!) and we would like to continue going to meetings without distractions or unrelated issues going on in the class. My husband is a Leo sun with a Scorpio moon, as well!! I would really like it if he would do that thing where he roars at her. lolIP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 20421
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 11:21 AM
quote:
Originally posted by britterfly:
Thank you, Ami. I feel like she has some game going on as well. So how should I deal with this evil little wench, Ami? *frustrated*
Do NOT deal with it, yourself. That is all I can say. Do not go head on.
Other than that, I don't know about the other player, which is your husband.
If anyone "deals" with it, it must be he. I am not liking your husband too much, now .
------------------
Do You Think This Psychic Is Cute?
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 20421
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 11:21 AM
quote:
Originally posted by britterfly:
Thank you, Ami. I feel like she has some game going on as well. So how should I deal with this evil little wench, Ami? *frustrated*
Do NOT deal with it, yourself. That is all I can say. Do not go head on.
Other than that, I don't know about the other player, which is your husband.
If anyone "deals" with it, it must be he. I am not liking your husband too much, now .
------------------
Do You Think This Psychic Is Cute?
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 11:53 AM
Mitch doesn't much care. He thinks it's stupid that I am upset about it. He says that if we just ignore her, the situation will go away. I highly disagree.IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 11:57 AM
I asked him if he would talk to her about it instead, like you suggested, Ami, and he blew up and asked why HE needs to deal with it now just because I am too scared to approach her. That really ****** me off because I am not too scared to approach her! She's probably subconsciously looking for a cat fight with another chick, but if I send mitch to tell her to feck off she'll have a whole different reaction for several reasons, one reason being that it would be most awkward for her if the man she is using as a pawn in this game comes forward himself and tells her to cut it out, as opposed to the ticked off and offended wife.IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 11:59 AM
Ami, what do you think if mitch and I approach her together, as a couple, and ask her to stop?IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 12:16 PM
message from hubby erased.IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 20421
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 01:08 PM
NOPE
If you husband is not stepping up to the plate, willingly, you are in trouble.If he is not respecting you, you are in trouble.
Do you want to put up your synastry with him. Perhaps, that will yield answers.
If not, I am here,if you want to talk more about it.
We can erase whatever you want,after 
IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 20421
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 01:08 PM
NOPE
If you husband is not stepping up to the plate, willingly, you are in trouble.If he is not respecting you, you are in trouble.
Do you want to put up your synastry with him. Perhaps, that will yield answers.
If not, I am here,if you want to talk more about it.
We can erase whatever you want,after
IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 01:14 PM
Thank you so much, Ami. I am on the outside, in red, he is on the inside, in blue.  IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 01:26 PM
i can't figure out how to crop out our personal info without making the image smaller and hard to read.  IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 20421
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 02:12 PM
Good
He is on the outside. That is much better cuz it is the classic way and makes it easier.------------------
Do You Think This Psychic Is Cute?
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 02:13 PM
No I am on the outside. I am the aquarius sun. he is the leo.IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 20421
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 02:16 PM
Let me ask you some things cuz this is how I do it.
Tell me what you think.
He has Saturn conj the moon in Scorpio. He is very passionate YET very shut down. He has opposite sides, shall we say. He may ,always, feel like he is left out of the fun, what is happening, the action, the in crowd.
You have Moon conj Uranus in the 6th in Scorpio. You are a wild and crazy kid, at heart,but a giver, by nature.
IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 466
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 02:18 PM
You have that interpretation completely spot on, Ami..... but it's the other way around. My hubby has uranus conjunct the moon in 6th. Very fun loving, good natured kid. I am the sour puss that has Saturn conjunct the moon. lolIP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 20421
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 17, 2011 02:18 PM
His Chiron goes in to your 12th house. This may bring YOUR deepest pain up to the surface just by having a relationship with him, which you do,by marriage, of course. You are not really shut down in the ways he is. You do not feel "on the outside", as he does.
I think he wants to "belong" so badly that he is not able to stand up when he needs to.
This situation is an example. Does this fit? ------------------
Do You Think This Psychic Is Cute?
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
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