posted January 14, 2014 08:59 PM            

You get to feel that just as intensely if not moreso, simply for learning experience and growth.

I've heard that all parents have to go through this - reliving everything - emotional turmoil, joy etc that they helped cause their offspring (just by having them) to feel throughout the person's life because they are even more karmically bound to them than they are to an average person.

Thoughts? I imagine the thought of that might be scary to some parents (none in particular here) but i hope it's true. I hope mine has to go thru an intense, even if brief experience of how their choices effected the other humans they brought into this world. I don't think most people even fathom what a huge karmic obligation and consequence that is.

More to say but not right now.

posted January 14, 2014 09:14 PM            

The most powerful one (that was causing me astral pain) was one as a French pirate, and my "inner voice" even spoke French and in a male tone for a few hours after this happened. I recalled having 2 wives (who didn't know about each other), and the reason I didn't just give up my life as a pirate and settle down was because I'd have to choose one and I couldn't, especially as I had children from both wives and I felt a sense of obligation to both (I provided for both families well out of my piracy), though I feared what would happen should my sons insist on one day joining me and learning of my other family.

Our ship had a deal with the American revolutionaries to plunder British ships (which we, being French, hated anyway), or at least give word (ie, naval intel) on those we couldn't destroy, and in return we had safe ports and services by rebel controlled ports. But the British responded by bringing a seemingly harmless ship that we thought was carrying supplies but was a trap carrying armed and prepared soldiers and we were massacred. I was shot & stabbed before I got knocked overboard where I drowned and this life, unlike the others, I recall the immediate afterlife:

I was staring down in spirit-form at the battle/slaughter and an overwhelming empathy for everyone fighting came over me. I felt the British hatred of us which was so similar to our hatred of them. And as my ego dissolved, losing any individuality I had experienced I saw all the evil the British and others had done to us; I saw all the evil we did to them (I was a ******* to many of them, helping to torture and kill prisoners, just as they did us, though we were all "eye for an eye" against each other): We were BOTH assured WE were in the right and WE stood for justice who made the wicked pay, but here I saw the horrid pain and fear of not only those of us ("us" now meaning pirate AND British) who died, but those who knew us; I saw their families, I saw the two women I was married to and our kids who would never see me again (and suffer without me providing for them) and much more....I "shrieked" (for want of a better word) in the raw pain of all the pain that I had taken part in and helped cause. It was sheer Love/Empathy, and it was sheer Hell, worse than burning. My empathy was such that knowing that many of the British and others would have their own reckoning much like my own only made it worse as I'd become pure love, and their suffering was my suffering so I not only suffered for what I'd done to them, but I suffered knowing they'd also suffer for what they did to us in a vicious circle, we were One.

posted January 14, 2014 09:41 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by PixieJane:

All in all the "life review" may be for the best but we'll all have our reckoning and when it's our turn we won't take joy in the mistakes and suffering of others (no matter how much we would've while alive).

---

This part ........my intentions didnt come out right in initial post. I can see how it would be taken in a way i didnt mean. I'm not looking for anyone to suffer, especially not my crazy parents. It brings tears to my eye to think of them having to relive any suffering they caused - through my own eyes or spirit. Maybe because i've seen them as young souls who really didnt know any better (not judging, just intuition).

So, don't get me wrong, i'm not rubbing my hands together thinking of that scenario. It's just nice to think that someday, FINALLY, another could actually truly understand how badly they hurt another and feel sorry about it. and not say some kind of remark about how all children choose their parents before coming into this life, so deal with it (me and abuse) or some other avoidant bs.

I'd be the first one one standing there waiting, open arms for a hug asking, 'Now do you see? Now do you get it? It's okay. It's over now.'

but when people wont take any responsibility for their actions and try to heap it all on others during their lifetime, yeah, you kind of hope they find a new perspective at some point. Even if it's in the afterlife.

posted January 14, 2014 09:43 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by teasel:
I tend to think about what I might be doing to someone else. .

---

Same here.

posted January 14, 2014 09:50 PM            

I don't necessarily know that we experience that when we die (I rather hope not actually, as I would think karma would be sufficient in most cases, if you believe in karma...if not, let's just peacefully agree to disagree).

I know that my mom didn't intend to inflict the type of damage that she did with me. She honestly did not mean to do that, and I can see it now. She really tried, and her intentions were honestly very admirable in a way. But it just sucked for a variety of reasons that I won't go into. She was brave in many ways, so I appreciate that now.

I worry all the time about what a gigantic responsibility I've taken on as a mother. The slightest choices or even difference in personality can make such an enormous difference to each individual person during their childhood. You just hope that love is enough.

I think about things that I've done that have hurt other people throughout my life through pure, blind, self-centeredness, and I wonder whether I will have to deal with more karma with them in some future life, or whether I was helping them repay a karmic debt or learn something they needed to learn.

My brain really should just shut up sometimes, but it doesn't. (Pisces Sun in 8th opposite Virgo Moon, at your service.)

So I just live my life and do the best that I can to try to make up for anything that I feel I need redemption for in this life.

I apologize when I need to, and hope that the other person hears me.
And then I try not to repeat the same mistakes.
But sometimes that can take decades to master...

posted January 15, 2014 12:07 AM            

*spooky timing!*

The book includes accounts from people who've had near death experiences, and all of them describe the life review as a relatively painless process, because the light being who is guiding them through it is utterly non-judgemental. According to that collection of accounts, all is basically forgiven at the time of the review...yet the person gets a clearer sense of right/wrong or selfish versus loving, and they keep that desire to live more kindly once they come back to life.

Thought you'd all like a book review

----

As for me and my mothering...it's just very hard. Yes, there is karma. If I snap at my children, they will snap at each other. Every little thing, basically, is a lesson for them. All my problems just get amplified and mirrored by my children. So yeah...sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night absolutely petrified about how they might turn out.

What helps me get by is that my children KNOW they are loved, and my husband and I, for all our shortcomings, try and make it obvious every single day. If I sleep late my little ones will hop in my bed and kiss me awake and start telling me jokes.

How bad can the future be, when mornings start like that? Right?

Yes I am naive (and have 5H Neptune! ) and have my handicaps, but basically I love my kids, they know it, so we're good. Just like, my parents had their shortcomings but I never doubted that they loved me, and that's been my indispensable rock, even after both passed away.

posted January 15, 2014 12:14 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by T:

but when people wont take any responsibility for their actions and try to heap it all on others during their lifetime, yeah, you kind of hope they find a new perspective at some point. Even if it's in the afterlife.

---

posted January 15, 2014 12:20 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Violets:
You just hope that love is enough.

---

Yup...that is like my full time job!

quote:

---

Originally posted by Violets:
And then I try not to repeat the same mistakes. But sometimes that can take decades to master...

---

At least we are all pretty much having to learn the same way...trials and errors, more trials and errors...it's not like everyone else "gets it" faster.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Violets:
And here's why I like this song so much.
Chicago, by Sufjan Stevens.

---

posted January 15, 2014 12:30 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by PixieJane:
My empathy was such that knowing that many of the British and others would have their own reckoning much like my own only made it worse as I'd become pure love, and their suffering was my suffering so I not only suffered for what I'd done to them, but I suffered knowing they'd also suffer for what they did to us in a vicious circle, we were One.

---

posted January 15, 2014 12:35 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by teasel:
What freaks me out more, is the idea of what sort of life I might have next. Until the past two years, it was a pretty good life, except for the ongoing wrestling with anxiety.

---

Yeah...it's scary to think of how bad things can get. As I mentioned above, really my mind only travels to these very dark places of possibility in the middle of the night.

I can't deal with terrifying thoughts in the daytime. I take sam-E if I have to, to block very dark things out of my mind.

Drugs

posted January 15, 2014 01:10 AM            

I've noticed there is a very wide definition of karma in society these days. I don't 'believe' or 'disbelieve' in it. I think it's always in operation to some degree, for sure.

quote:

---

I know that my mom didn't intend to inflict the type of damage that she did with me. She honestly did not mean to do that, and I can see it now. She really tried, and her intentions were honestly very admirable in a way. But it just sucked for a variety of reasons that I won't go into. She was brave in many ways, so I appreciate that now.

---

It seems maybe 96% or so of people can naturally fall in love with their children effortlessly and do what is best for them. Every parent makes "mistakes" obviously. I hope what i wrote here didnt give you the wrong impression of my view on those relationships in general or anyone's here.

quote:

---

I worry all the time about what a gigantic responsibility I've taken on as a mother. The slightest choices or even difference in personality can make such an enormous difference to each individual person during their childhood. You just hope that love is enough.

---

Gosh! I would too!!! It shows what a great mom you are! Some people dont even consider those things! yeah, love conquers all!

quote:

---

My brain really should just shut up sometimes, but it doesn't. (Pisces Sun in 8th opposite Virgo Moon, at your service.)

---

raises hand -- Virgo moon here too. Yes, we have a tendency to think too much and always ready to be of service. *salutes you*

also thx for sharing that song. I loved it too.

posted January 15, 2014 01:44 AM            

quote:

---

It seems maybe 96% or so of people can naturally fall in love with their children effortlessly and do what is best for them. Every parent makes "mistakes" obviously. I hope what i wrote here didnt give you the wrong impression of my view on those relationships in general or anyone's here.

---

No, I think I understood what you were saying (I think?).

It just made me think of my own mother, and how it's taken me almost 39 years to realize how much she has always loved me, but just...really had a hard time expressing that.

Both of my parents had severely scarred childhoods, so it was somewhat predictable that I would come out with some scars as well (although to be fair, they could have done much worse, given the childhoods they had).

It's taken me a very long time to even get halfway through healing those wounds, and about as long to forgive my mother whole-heartedly.

But now I realize how much my resentment has hurt her, which does seem somewhat ironic, but...then I think about walking in her shoes, and feeling the pain of her child's resentment.

posted January 15, 2014 01:53 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Faith:

PS I didn't mean to take over this thread but was earnestly interested in all the replies so....'talked a lot.

---

LOL I like it when you do that (talk a lot).

I shouldnt write now, for a number of reasons. One being keyboard issues, two i've developed laryngitis as i try to fight off this cold. Never had laryngiits before, so this is an interesting experience.

I figure that between the two persistant issues, maybe it's a message from the universe telling me to just shut the hell up right now and maybe i should take heed and be more quiet (is that possible? ......maybe here......but not in RL..........lol!

As much as i have some things to say, maybe now is not the right time. Nothing comes out how i mean it to anyway. Maybe wait till my home planet Venus starts moving direct (especially seeing as it's in mutual reception with natal mercury.....and exactly transiting my asc atm)

yeah. i'll wait to say anything more.

posted January 15, 2014 02:03 AM            

i should jot down thoughts as they come to me for future replying.....the best ones escape me before i'm able to type them out.

will try to say what i wanted to over the next few days. hope this thread stays on this nice note/tract it's on in the meantime.

posted January 15, 2014 09:23 AM            

edit

posted January 15, 2014 09:26 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by T:
LOL I like it when you do that (talk a lot).

---

posted January 15, 2014 09:35 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Violets:
Both of my parents had severely scarred childhoods, so it was somewhat predictable that I would come out with some scars as well (although to be fair, they could have done much worse, given the childhoods they had).

---

^

My situation was similar, though not at drastic. My parents had difficult upbringings and recovered, but of course their issues still seeped into me. Actually I think I am more scarred from my grandmother than anyone else.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Violets:
And then I feel like I've entered into some sort of weird karmic labyrinth.

---

Well said...and I feel like that when I think of my mother and how much I resented her for forcing me to do certain things against my will. I tell myself that I have my own failures as a parent that are just different from hers. So if I would like to be forgiven for my distinct issues, forgive my mom for hers. But I'm just working on this and I'm 38.

At this rate I will need to live to 100 to really get over it.

posted January 15, 2014 11:22 AM            

Their issues did sort of seep into me, but they really did pretty well, given the things they went through. Although I didn't think so at the time. *sigh*

posted January 15, 2014 01:11 PM            

37 was hard for me, it was the first time I felt a bit old and noticed wrinkles. I think I even got some gray hairs but I refuse to pay attention to them.

I can't see them so they aren't there.

But these days I feel optimistic about aging. The lessons I've learned make me feel young again.

posted January 15, 2014 03:16 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Violets:
Consequences be damned!

---

oh come on.