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Topic: Insecurity...
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Odette Moderator Posts: 6589 From: Registered: May 2012
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posted January 14, 2016 05:21 AM
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DopGang Knowflake Posts: 1814 From: Registered: Jun 2015
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posted January 14, 2016 06:23 AM
Deal breaker for me. Not because it's such an awful thing that I couldn't look past it but because I take it as sign (warning) of things yet to come. IP: Logged |
Vajra Moderator Posts: 1407 From: Europe Registered: Dec 2012
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posted January 14, 2016 09:45 AM
quote: Originally posted by DopGang: Deal breaker for me. Not because it's such an awful thing that I couldn't look past it but because I take it as sign (warning) of things yet to come.
^Same here. I hate passive-aggressiveness and guilt tripping behavior even in the most casual of aquaintances, and every time I overlooked it or made excuses for it because of supposedly redeeming qualities in the person, it bit me in the butt later, so no more accepting such things. Better tread carefully with that person, Odette, it sounds rather pathetic to do this semi-publicly on FB, especially so in a romantic context. IME, people who choose to behave like this are experts at regularly blaming other people for their own mistakes, and can have other nasty qualities to boot. It's a character defect and unless they consciously work on overcoming it, it's not nice to be entangled in their affairs. Just my opinion, of course, not knowing any further details and only going by your description. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66241 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 14, 2016 12:35 PM
I would take the WHOLE person, Odette. You are super confident and I wish I were more like you lolHowever, just cuz a person is not does not mean he is not a good match for you imo ------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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Odette Moderator Posts: 6589 From: Registered: May 2012
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posted January 14, 2016 07:21 PM
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Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66241 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 14, 2016 07:56 PM
I read the first few lines and got an insight and then I will read the rest. You have the situation in which you need to be friends first that you described earlier( I can't remember the name) so you are "different" than what he is used to, so therein may be a disconnect but I will continue reading.------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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DopGang Knowflake Posts: 1814 From: Registered: Jun 2015
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posted January 14, 2016 07:57 PM
Edited since you've seen it. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66241 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 14, 2016 08:00 PM
Ok I am gonna be very honest. I think that YOUR situation about how you fall in love/get attracted etc kind of unglued him because it is not" normal" I use that term in terms of not "usual" and hence, when things feel 'out of control/difference/ weird, people's worst sides/manipulative sides come out. We all have these shadow sides. We all have parts of us that we don't like, don't want people to see and don't WANT to use, but uncomfortable/strange/out of control situations bring them out. Hence, I think you should level with him because he is prolly hurt that you don't "like him like he likes you" You DO like him but your signals are saying otherwise imo ------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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Odette Moderator Posts: 6589 From: Registered: May 2012
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posted January 14, 2016 08:19 PM
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DopGang Knowflake Posts: 1814 From: Registered: Jun 2015
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posted January 14, 2016 08:25 PM
Well, to be honest I think it's extremely common but I stop short of saying that you're abnormal. Rather, uncommon. I admire people who have that control, though it's something that would probably be difficult for me personally, to do or deal with. I know it would be. LOL IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66241 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 14, 2016 08:30 PM
YES, it is normal at the beginning to be crazy/wild about the person and WANT to spend every minute with them, whether or not you show it to the person, you feel it imo and ime------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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Odette Moderator Posts: 6589 From: Registered: May 2012
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posted January 14, 2016 08:31 PM
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DopGang Knowflake Posts: 1814 From: Registered: Jun 2015
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posted January 14, 2016 08:59 PM
Nah. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66241 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 14, 2016 09:01 PM
OdetteBe honest with him. You are a cool and amazing person. Be YOU!
------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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aquaguy91 Moderator Posts: 11840 From: Wankety Wankerson Registered: Jan 2012
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posted January 14, 2016 09:08 PM
quote: Originally posted by Odette: Wow. I really suck.I should've stirred clear of this from the beginning. I'm going to walk around with a sign that says "Celibate and not interested" - and if someone approaches me I will be like: "So... if Sheldon's character was female.. How would you feel about dating that woman? Please be honest.. and then move on with your life, in the knowledge that you will be with someone who is SO much better for you, than I will ever be!"
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12muddy Knowflake Posts: 2603 From: Registered: Feb 2013
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posted January 15, 2016 02:27 AM
It'd make me wary. Even in friendships I don't like it, let alone romantic.
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Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66241 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 15, 2016 09:33 AM
I started to say something last night but did not know how to say it.Odette--you are AMAZING, just as you are. You have a different manner of interacting, which is very real and can be very confusing to people who have not experienced it before. Hence, I think you need to tell him, but in broad strokes, not all the details because it is "too much information" at this point and may scare him. I would tell him that it takes you a while to warm up, so you want to go slowly and that it is not because you don't care, but just your nature. ------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66241 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 15, 2016 01:20 PM
I just want to add something. I think Odette is one of the most amazing people I know. I have known her from my first days on LL, about 7 years ago.Any guy would be the luckiest guy in the world to be her guy. I want to encourage you, Odette, to let him know you, little by little. You have nothing to be ashamed of, if you are feeling this. ------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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DopGang Knowflake Posts: 1814 From: Registered: Jun 2015
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posted January 15, 2016 01:25 PM
edit
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Odette Moderator Posts: 6589 From: Registered: May 2012
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posted January 15, 2016 07:07 PM
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Odette Moderator Posts: 6589 From: Registered: May 2012
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posted January 15, 2016 07:15 PM
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Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66241 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 15, 2016 07:38 PM
I will edit out the quotes, Odette------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66241 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 15, 2016 07:43 PM
Stick up the synastry, Odette. Let's see if there is real soul there. I would say that if you understand your issues and want him to accept them, you have to understand his BUT if there is no real soul, why bother? This is how I look at it anyway. I think there are several layers going on here. 1. You have issues with going slowly. 2. He may be insecure due to this plus his own insecurities, in general. 3. You are both just getting to know each other and it can be weird during that time. 4. The main thing I would want to know about him was if he had CHARACTER. The charts do not really show this but they can show us quite a bit, which may sound like a paradox but I think you can see if he has a nature you can LIVE with by looking at the synastry. ------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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PixieJane Moderator Posts: 7513 From: CA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted January 15, 2016 08:25 PM
Many people not only want to monopolize your time but also even take a friendly gesture, smile, or basic courtesy as a sign of romantic or sexual interest. Not everyone, but enough do it--and I've even seen it promoted in popular magazines, by gurus, and such--that if I didn't have so much Sag, I think I'd just give everyone around me a cold glare just to protect myself and prevent misunderstandings (though technically that would be misunderstood as my hating everyone, when it's actually I hate the games common in society).And damn if you do or don't. I don't feel like going into it. The unspoken rules are IMPOSSIBLE to live up to without giving someone miffed a reason to call foul on you. Plus, many misinterpret what I say, just as was done to you, that is you were honest, they thought you were playing a game they had to "figure out," like solve the puzzle and win the prize (you) as they were hoping. Give them an inch and they'll demand a mile, and pout if they don't get it. And I can relate to you here, that's all I feel like saying on it. IP: Logged |
Odette Moderator Posts: 6589 From: Registered: May 2012
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posted January 15, 2016 08:37 PM
quote: Originally posted by PixieJane: Many people not only want to monopolize your time but also even take a friendly gesture, smile, or basic courtesy as a sign of romantic or sexual interest. Not everyone, but enough do it--and I've even seen it promoted in popular magazines, by gurus, and such--that if I didn't have so much Sag, I think I'd just give everyone around me a cold glare just to protect myself and prevent misunderstandings (though technically that would be misunderstood as my hating everyone, when it's actually I hate the games common in society).And damn if you do or don't. I don't feel like going into it. The unspoken rules are IMPOSSIBLE to live up to without giving someone miffed a reason to call foul on you. Plus, many misinterpret what I say, just as was done to you, that is you were honest, they thought you were playing a game they had to "figure out," like solve the puzzle and win the prize (you) as they were hoping. Give them an inch and they'll demand a mile, and pout if they don't get it. And I can relate to you here, that's all I feel like saying on it.
Thank you Pixie!
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