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Author
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Topic: What does a guy have to do to be good enough for women?
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aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 17, 2022 02:30 PM
  
I have been on Lindaland for a decade now and so much has changed, but I'm still a complete loser with women. It just seems like no matter what I do I'm not good enough.I recently had a major change of direction education and career wise. I decided I wanted to do something different and was able to pivot into a new graduate program and get a new good job. But I'm still completely miserable. I want to be enough. I want to be attractive. I want to be desired. And for whatever f###ing reason, I'm just not good enough for women. I'm intelligent. I can project skill and competence in job interviews, but women still won't look me in the eye. That hurts my self esteem so much. I'd give up all my book smarts and worldly successes just to have one woman look at me in a loving way. I don't get any affection since my mom died over a year ago and I hate my life because of that. IP: Logged |
saronna
Knowflake Posts: 1380
From: Sydney Australia
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted March 17, 2022 06:31 PM
Your soulmate will love you for you not for your looks or book smarts or your job. It's hard when a parent passes away. My dad passed away when I was 26 & I got into a relationship & I didn't take time for grief. I met my soulmate after I left the ex. You will meet someone who loves you for you. Don't worry about looks your soulmate will love you.IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 17, 2022 07:08 PM
Thanks for the kind words, but I doubt it. I'm 31 and have all but given up on love. IP: Logged |
saronna
Knowflake Posts: 1380
From: Sydney Australia
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted March 17, 2022 07:13 PM
I met my soulmate when I was about 26 & other soulmate when I was 36. It's not to late for love & your soulmate.IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 155934
From: I hold a Juris Doctorate (J.D.) and a Legum Magister (LL.M.)!
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted March 19, 2022 06:32 PM
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aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 19, 2022 10:46 PM
I just saw the other thread about monogamy. That polyamory crap is getting extremely popular. My brother was on Tinder recently and showed me how basically half of the women on there now are openly married and having flings.
It really is that bad now.
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saronna
Knowflake Posts: 1380
From: Sydney Australia
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted March 20, 2022 08:02 AM
I don't know if polamory works maybe there are alot of problem's & jealousy & polamory doesn't have the security of a monogamous relationship. I don't know if you can have that security in polamory. Soulmates don't need polamory or marriage to be monogamous. Soulmates have that security of a monogamous relationship. Soulmates complete each other & half of each other & don't need polamory.IP: Logged |
PlutoWasHere
Knowflake Posts: 406
From: The Nether World
Registered: Mar 2021
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posted March 20, 2022 04:02 PM
If I remember correctly you have Saturn in aspect to your 7th house ruler? Saturn is the planet of karmic lessons and will bring rewards but only if you hang in there. Don’t give up! No one is unworthy of love! On a more practical note, do you have any female friends or maybe female relatives you could ask for advice? Sometimes little things can make a big difference. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 74228
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted March 20, 2022 10:29 PM
I am sorry to hear you so sad! I am sending a huge hug to you!------------------
Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE.
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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saronna
Knowflake Posts: 1380
From: Sydney Australia
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted March 20, 2022 11:21 PM
Sending you lots of hugs.IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 23, 2022 11:00 PM
quote:
Originally posted by PlutoWasHere:
If I remember correctly you have Saturn in aspect to your 7th house ruler? Saturn is the planet of karmic lessons and will bring rewards but only if you hang in there. Don’t give up! No one is unworthy of love! On a more practical note, do you have any female friends or maybe female relatives you could ask for advice? Sometimes little things can make a big difference.
I have Saturn conjunct my sun (my 7th house ruler) in the 12th. As for your question about female family members, no. I don't have good relationships with the women in my family. They treat me like garbage too. And frankly, I don't find women's advice to be very helpful. Just being honest! For example, women say stuff like stop looking and it will just happen. That is great advice for women, not so much for men. I know this because I have been rejected a lot and one of the things that happens when you get rejected 100% of the time is that you go through periods where you get demoralized and don't try at all. Women would understand this if they got rejected as much as men. IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 23, 2022 11:01 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Ami Anne:
I am sorry to hear you so sad! I am sending a huge hug to you!
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aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 23, 2022 11:02 PM
quote:
Originally posted by saronna:
Sending you lots of hugs.
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aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 23, 2022 11:02 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Randall:
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saronna
Knowflake Posts: 1380
From: Sydney Australia
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted March 24, 2022 07:30 AM
Soulmates arrive sometimes at the same time. It could be fate destiny free will with higher selves of soulmates & karma with Saturn at a later time. Timing might be delayed for soulmates with Saturn in 12th conjunct 7th with relationship with you & your soulmate. Linda Goodman wrote about twin souls in love signs. It's interesting to look at my chart & progression when I was 26 when I met my soulmate & when my dad passed away & 36 when I met my other soulmate. & to look at my chart & progression when I was 23 when I wanted to find my soulmate. I don't know I met three soulmates two soulmates when I was 36 & other one when I was 26 when my dad passed away 9th April Linda Goodman birthday. & I bought a computer October 1998 with my dad's death insurance & I met my soulmate when I was 26. I was so sad after my dad passed away & it was my first computer that helped me with grief. I did a IT course at Tafe & helped me to know my dad helped me with computer & IT course & meeting my soulmates. & my dad helped me to help cancer survivors & with grief my dad passing away from cancer. My dad was 48 & I'm 51 & I look back 26 years ago since my dad passed away & see how much he helps me with my life. Linda Goodman love signs writes about having one twin soul & recognising them.IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 24, 2022 11:11 AM
I don't really believe in the concept of soul mates anymore. How can you when your whole experience is that you don't fit with anyone? IP: Logged |
MoonMystic
Knowflake Posts: 6520
From: ♏ Rising
Registered: Nov 2016
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posted March 24, 2022 12:11 PM
@sarona 
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
I don't really believe in the concept of soul mates anymore. How can you when your whole experience is that you don't fit with anyone?
@aquaguy91,
I didn't strongly believe in these connections and true the types of spirit loves vary. I think the I refer to may be an actual Soulmate but I've been using the twin flame terminology. You most certainly have someone. She may be very different from that which you are seeking. In fact in the unions, the pair usually have complicated dynamics and not readily available thus learn how to get together methodically and be patient. These type relationships are much more powerful than those where you met at a bar, blind date, dating app etc. This is non forced pairing. Divinily ordained possibly. The power's beyond have had a hand in these
match makings. You'll have to meditate and ask for her. Say you want her in your world. My guy I call my Twin, asked for me in a prayer type moment. He opened his heart and asked with his heart. It was not long after I appeared. Don't give up. Try. Open your heart first. If the Divine hears you, this is up to how powerful you feel, the door will activate. Your Soulmate/TF what have you will appear new in your world OR someone that was always under your nose, you didn't see in this way will become open to you as the ONE to them too. All the best in your finding her. She wants you to know her too. Just keep believing.
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saronna
Knowflake Posts: 1380
From: Sydney Australia
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted March 24, 2022 06:15 PM
I don't know what I believe in but soulmates twin souls destiny & experience. I read Linda Goodman love signs & star signs when I was 17. I don't why I asked psychic Fiona McCullen Australian best pyschic when I was 23 about my soulmate. She's passed away in about 1996 & I was lucky to get a love connections 2UE radio pyschic reading. I don't know about this soulmate but I went on with my life. I didn't go looking for my soulmate. I had ended my first relationship & I was so busy. I met him when I was 36 & I was working on water contamination in September 2006 at the library. He was at the library from Bankstown city council & from environmental. My sister said many years before I meet soulmate that I would meet someone at the library. The library was like my home & I would spend all day at Bankstown library 7 days a week since I was 16. My other soulmate I met at Sydney international airport I couldn't decide if to catch a plane home or a country train home to my sister's home & I met my soulmate. I met another soulmate at computer internet cafe. When I wasn't looking for soulmates I met them & when I least expected it. IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 24, 2022 09:57 PM
When people talk about privileges and inequalities, it's funny how they never talk about their family lives in terms of being inequalities or privileges.I had a rough childhood. I was "close" to my mom, but she casually told me she hated me and insulted me in cruel ways when she got angry. I also grew up being different and the black sheep of the family and spent a lot of my time alone and isolated. We were poor during my teenage years and my dad went off to prison during that time too. Needless to say, I never even had a chance to develop a healthy self image during my formative years. Life said "Nuh uh. You aren't allowed to be happy and feel good." IP: Logged |
Dumuzi
Knowflake Posts: 3882
From:
Registered: Oct 2018
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posted March 25, 2022 07:07 AM
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
When people talk about privileges and inequalities, it's funny how they never talk about their family lives in terms of being inequalities or privileges.I had a rough childhood. I was "close" to my mom, but she casually told me she hated me and insulted me in cruel ways when she got angry. I also grew up being different and the black sheep of the family and spent a lot of my time alone and isolated. We were poor during my teenage years and my dad went off to prison during that time too. Needless to say, I never even had a chance to develop a healthy self image during my formative years. Life said "Nuh uh. You aren't allowed to be happy and feel good."
ok but you're still alive so what's stopping you from working on that? having a hard life is only an excuse to a point, even in hard situations it's possible to find happiness and learn to care about yourself i haven't had a "good life" by any means, all kinds of abuse, health issues etc and i still don't look at life the way you do being "good enough" for someone else isn't a thing, if someone likes you they like you, but i've told you a million times over at this point your attitude is repellent to most women the chip on your shoulder, the anger, the misery, the insecurities, the bitterness, the constant stream of excuses as to why those things can't be better etc these things are **** your average person doesn't want to be around because they're toxic maybe work on your internal **** and stop worrying about finding someone else and they'll come your way when you're in a better place
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saronna
Knowflake Posts: 1380
From: Sydney Australia
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted March 25, 2022 10:31 AM
You can be happy & have a good life. It's hard when a parent passes away & we were close & have mixed feelings & experience with them. Working through childhood experiences is good & put you in a better place & hope for a better life & something to look forward too. It's good you have goals & studies & a new job it's a huge accomplishment since your mum passed away. I felt empty when my dad died & I studied & spent alot of time with my sister's & mum. It's taken a long time to heal grief & childhood grief. I didn't have self confidence until I was 36 & I met my soulmates & I'm 51 & reconnected with my other soulmate after 23 years about 2 years ago. Hugs.IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 74228
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted March 25, 2022 11:08 AM
I am gonna say something that is not politically correct.I have done many charts. There are some things that people can't really overcome by thought or trying hard etc
There are some pains and struggles that stay with us. I will give an easy example from my life. I am an earth void. I cannot organize things. Also, I don't see practical things that are broken in the house or I see them and then ignore them. It is the nature of the earth void. Of course, that is not really painful. However, some people have Chiron conj Venus, for example. Love and pain go together no matter how hard they try to change it. Then, we have gifts we did not earn. Those are the trines. However, I recently told a client that I really don't think she could ever have a happy marriage. I could tell she had accepted this herself before I told her or I would not have told her straight out like that. She had a peace about accepting it because her life experience had told her it was the case. ------------------
Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE.
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 25, 2022 02:00 PM
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saronna
Knowflake Posts: 1380
From: Sydney Australia
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted March 25, 2022 05:30 PM
I agree with Edgar Cayce will is strongest than natal chart & astrology are indicators. I look at my chart & see I need to work on earth & with alot of fire & air I have to work on consistency. Relationships & having them could in hard aspect & need to work them to have good & happy relationship the same with any area in life with astrology & hard aspects. Astrology helps move to a better & good life with happy relationship & happy life.IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 12398
From: Rent Free in Grahma male's head
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted March 25, 2022 11:59 PM
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