posted November 18, 2008 09:25 AM           

I can sympathize greatly but I can't say I ever found any alternative therapies that did much of anything. To be fair, I never really looked. So, it's more than possible they're out there. I never took any medicine, conventional or alternative. I've heard that Bach's Rescue Remedy, while not a miracle cure, has a gentle, calming effect.

For me, just the realization that it was PTSD, was a huge step toward recovery. Idiot that I am, I hadn't made the connection between the original event and the symptoms that followed. Without getting into details, the inability to "deal" with the original event is, I believe, the root cause of PTSD. Once I knew the source, I was able to begin the work of sorting through it and .... this is hard to explain .... was able to almost allow myself another chance to react.

And of course, time. I know it's a cliche, but time was, and continues to be, the great healer. Time and Faith, you know. That's the mysterious and elusive Balm of Gilead.

Tell us how you're doing ... if you feel up to sharing.

posted November 19, 2008 12:57 PM         

I started having panic attacks at the age of five, after surviving a situation (something I've mentioned here before), and whilst living in another stressful situation. I can relate to Tink and sunshine_lion, with the agoraphobia (my first real bout with agoraphobia was at the age of fifteen), panic attacks and jumpiness. Flower remedies do help me, but I use different essences at different times.

I had a couple of books out of the library, earlier this year. I'll look up the titles for you ~ reading them was a comfort to me, but I need to get my own copies, and actually work through the exercises.

posted November 20, 2008 12:23 AM           

Tink, i know exactly what you mean about how simply realizing what is going on- knowing the source of it, often being a HUGE step towards recovery.

posted November 20, 2008 12:25 AM           

anyway....

I "talk" to my dad through my heart everyday...maybe too often. I am just still very worried about him and want him to be okay and safe and for him to know how much i love (without the "d") him. So, i 'voice' it often...send it out there..and remind him to focus on all the 'good' times he had in his life, the love shared. Truth is, i'm extremely worried about him. Id do anything to make sure he wasnt going through any pain right now. I said some prayers to God to put me through hell in order to help him get out of his. Maybe that is why i'm going through it now. That would be okay with me, but i'd like to know aobut him. That is one of the hardest parts in all this...i feel totally helpless and frustrated in that regard. And am not comforted by certain things i've read over the years aobut the afterlife and suicides. Unfortunately, I cant be sure that he isnt suffering and that REALLY bothers me. He didnt know any better, he really didnt. I can't save him. I want to take away his pain and i'm p*ssed that i cant. Maybe someday I will know for sure if he has been hearing me and the messages and that they are helping him along on his way. ? I hope. Until then, i have to try to live my life and find peace somehow. Perhaps for him too. It's hard. I want to do it for him. I'll be fine, whatever which way. He wanted that for me too - to be happy, to find peace. And that is what i tried so much to provide to him. They say we can't do that for another. Oh how we grew. Wow. It really cant be put into words...never. It was always on one hand and another at the same time. But either hand, serious love was there and expressed readily. I'm glad I was able to keep the promise i made to him that he wouldnt have to die alone. There's so much...too much to explain. Nothing could tough it. Back and forth between overwhelming anguish and love and guilt and frustration. I failed.

gee, sorry, never meant to go on this long. doesnt even begin to explain what really happened or where i'm at from one moment to the next.

Bach's RR and looking into other flower remedies is a good idea. TY.

Thank yous.

posted November 20, 2008 10:03 AM         

(as I raise my hand....)

I have had it for a very long time and it has taken quite the toll on my body.

Physically, the brain becomes unable to regulate it's own chemistry and the stress hormones, epinepherine, norepinepherine, and adrenaline, especially run amok with little regulation from dopamine, the feel good hormone that counteracts the others.

In the fight or flight response in a "normal" individual, the stress, "speed" hormones are released to help us react quicker, think clearer, etc. Then dopamine releases to slow us down, calm us, take away the anxiety the others have unleashed.

In the PTSD brain, it is so used to releasing the stress hormones that it releases them almost constantly and increases the release in even the slightest threat of stress to the body or emotions. The really big insult is that in the PTSD brain dopamine malfunctions so only time will slow down the homeostasis of the physical body and finally the stress hormones wear off.

PTSD put me into heart failure. After years and years of these nasties running amok in my body, my heart finally began to fail due to the constant over-running of the speed hormones. I am on a beta-blocker now, for my blood pressure and arrythemias and it protects my heart alot, but it is up to me to keep away from all stressfull situations, as much as I can anyway.

I remember, when my psycho ex bf was stalking me, I could feel the speed hormones kicking in. Once, I went and looked in the mirror and my eyes were huge, pupils dilated, I looked like I had just snorted a line of meth!

Situations like this and my heart failure have taught me to keep away from all that could potentially get the crazy hormones out of control. I can no longer enjoy a mosh pit, I really have to be careful at work and meditate when I am feeling stressed, I have run off all toxic people in my life. I try to get enough rest, eat well, and live a peaceful life.

Honestly, I used to enjoy the rush. Normally a sedate individual anyway, when the nasties would kick in, I was on a nautural high and could climb the highest mountains. But I found out that it was damaging my heart relentlessly.

The beta blocker I am on really knocks me down, almost to the point of depression at times, but it is protecting my heart. It mellows me as well. A physician I used to work with told me just the other day that the doseage I am on of this particular med should have a women of my age on the ground. That goes to show me that the nasties are still ever present and the beta-blocker does not knock me to my knees cause there are still so many speed hormones running out of control, on a nearly constant basis.

I have done much research. There is alot to be said about PTSD related to war issues and survivors of natural disasters, but little is addressed about PTSD and domestic violence and other origins that people would not normally think would cause PTSD.

How it will affect you, long term is yet to be seen.

Look for symtpoms in your physical body and anxiety related issues. Are you still having arrythemias? (palpitations?)

I was once on anti-depressives, but I loathe them and I figure why jack with my brain chemistry anymore than it already is.

I am sorry to hear that you have to deal with this, it is not easy, but good that you found out early.

You know where to find me if you need anything.

blessings

posted November 20, 2008 11:32 PM           

Yes, i still get the arrythemias. Usually right before I get my awful periods. I'm getting tests done to see if i have endometriosis, cervical cancer and/or a thyroid disorder as well.

The day he died I suddenly got my period - two weeks early. I am usually pretty regular. And it happened again this month - got it way to early while under some major stress.

The doctor gave me medication to take as needed for panic/anxiety disorders. I won't be taking them though.

quote:

---

Physically, the brain becomes unable to regulate it's own chemistry and the stress hormones, epinepherine, norepinepherine, and adrenaline, especially run amok with little regulation from dopamine, the feel good hormone that counteracts the others.

In the fight or flight response in a "normal" individual, the stress, "speed" hormones are released to help us react quicker, think clearer, etc. Then dopamine releases to slow us down, calm us, take away the anxiety the others have unleashed.

In the PTSD brain, it is so used to releasing the stress hormones that it releases them almost constantly and increases the release in even the slightest threat of stress to the body or emotions.

---

That's exactly how it feels/is. I've had a lot of stress over my lifetime and i can no longer take even the slightest amount of it now. It's definitely wreaked havoc on my body, cycles, brain. Now that I know more, i can see i've been struggling with it for far longer than I knew. This last event has sent everything over the edge.

I'm glad to hear you have found treatment that work for you. I wont take antidepressants either.

I'm here for you too, if ever you need. And thank you.

posted November 20, 2008 11:49 PM           

I'm glad to hear things are getting better with you. And without meds!

teasel, I'm interested in those book titles - no rush though! You know you can email me any time if you need or want to talk. I know youre like me though and do better when you isolate; i truly understand all about that. Love to you.

posted November 22, 2008 07:22 AM           

Read "Healing Of The Soul: Shamanism And Psyche" by Ann Drake, Psy.D.

She's worked extensively with PTSD.

posted November 24, 2008 11:02 PM         

I was speaking to a dear friend of mine at work today, and I have learned to practice the words that I offered to her.

I have learned that we can not always avoid all of the stressors in our lives and those of us who have been granted the burden of PTSD surely should try to alleviate as many stressors as we can, however, sometimes it is impossible.

So what I told my friend, is that, change what you can and accept what you can not....

In areas of our lives that we can make a positive change, for me, diet, exercise, meditation, increased awarness, eliminating toxic individuals (just to name a few) we should and then, we provide a more centered, grounded "be-ing" for the nasties of PTSD to play on.

Build up what we can, raise what we have control over, and the nasties will eventually loose their power........this I am QUITE sure of!!!

Blessings to all

posted November 25, 2008 11:38 AM           

Thank you.

posted November 25, 2008 07:49 PM         

I SO hear ya...really I do.

GOsh, how do we just get away?

I dunno.