posted November 19, 2012 07:18 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Blackbird:
Sun in Scorpio in 9th house
Sun conjunct Mercury
Sun conjunct Saturn
Sun conjunct Pluto
Mercury in Libra in 9th house
Saturn in Scorpio in 9th house
[b]Pluto in Libra in 9th house

Traditional, conservative, religious upbringing.
Now apathetic / agnostic. No interest or belief in god or religion.
Family moved several times while growing up. Lost friends.
Dropped out of college. Lack of interest.
Don't like traveling or playing tourist. Too expensive. Look at landscape photos online instead.
At times, voracious reading and obsessive researching. Any topic of interest.
Interested in politics, law, justice, humanitarian stuff, but not active in this area.
Seldom watch the news. Usually not interested in current events.
Internally lost / adrift. Have house and job/career, but no sense of identity and unsure of place in the world.

Explanations?[/B]

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Are you male or female. You feel very Scorpio lol

Wow--you have almost all your planets in the 9th house. I have a 9th house Gemini stellium.

Do you want to put up your chart and we can look at it?

If so, please, put it on a new thread addressed to me, so we can start new.

What would be interesting about your chart was if you had any super contrasts to your strong Scorpio and 9th house.

How would you incorporate these?

What is your ASC and Moon?

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 19, 2012 06:47 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:Wow--you have almost all your planets in the 9th house.

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Yes, a whole slew of conjunctions in the 9th house, right around the Libra-Scorpio cusp. I'm grateful that I don't have Venus or Mars in the 9th. I would feel like the need or desire to travel in search of love, or dealing with cultural barriers in a personal relationship, would be another challenge and frustration on top of the ones I'm already dealing with.

quote:

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I have a 9th house Gemini stellium.

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What does this mean for you? How do you see the placement in your life and personality?
Do you travel often?
Have you returned to school (official or otherwise) several times?
Have you changed majors or fields of study several times?
I bet your reading range would impress even a liberal-arts major.

quote:

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How would you incorporate these?

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There seems to be an overload of Pluto energy in my chart, and most of it is focused in my 9th house. I think it would be exciting and empowering if I didn't feel so confused and lost most of the time. I don't really know what overall effect that stellium has for my life. I think it's odd (ironic?) that I don't want to travel despite the 9th house placements; I have the money, but I don't want to spend it on temporary pleasures like traveling.

quote:

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Do you want to put up your chart and we can look at it?
If so, please, put it on a new thread addressed to me, so we can start new.

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Yes, thank you. Here's a link to the thread I created:

http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum11/HTML/005036.html

I also have a link to my chart in my signature. I just have to remember to check the box to include my signature at the bottom of each post; the forum software does not seem to have any option to make that the default behavior.

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quote:

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Are you male or female.

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Male.

quote:

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You feel very Scorpio lol

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Yes, I feel a lot of Scorpio "energy", but for better or worse, it is mostly internal. I seldom express that energy and those feelings, whether in normal communication, love or otherwise. It can be very frustrating. I am introverted, in the sense that my focus is usually inward instead of outward. This is indicated/suggested by various placements in my chart.

quote:

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What would be interesting about your chart was if you had any super contrasts to your strong Scorpio and 9th house.

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Indeed: Sun square Ascendant (Capricorn), Moon in Gemini, and Venus conjunct Mars in Virgo. In my admittedly cynical and self-critical view, these placements are weak, if not outright damning, for a Scorpio Sun. All that wonderful energy and passion... filtered and flattened by a reserved, businesslike Capricorn mask and a picky, prudish, critical Virgo approach to everyone and everything. And the Gemini tendency to get bored easily, and have trouble focusing on anything for very long.

quote:

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What is your ASC and Moon?

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Capricorn rising/ascendant, and Moon in Gemini in the 5th house.

posted November 19, 2012 07:18 PM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 19, 2012 07:26 PM            

Venus conj Mars is a very charismatic person.
Cappy ASC can be very cool when there are many different sides of a person.

It makes for a complex person

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 19, 2012 07:44 PM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 01:48 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:
Could you put your chart on a separate thread here and we will look at some of your complexities!

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I replaced the chart image in the other post with an updated image from Astrodienst as you requested. Thank you again.

posted November 20, 2012 05:57 AM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 06:24 AM            

Chiron in the 4th
Did you have a lot of pain in your childhood, with the mother perhaps, which you find it very hard to shake. I have this too.

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 06:27 AM            

You feel very easy to talk to. That is why

Anyway, you love fun, creativity, and romance and your goals are to pursue 5th House activities.

Do you write?

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 06:30 AM            

Did you have a hard relationship with both of them?

I will wait for your answers and be back

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 12:23 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:

Chiron in the 4th
Did you have a lot of pain in your childhood, with the mother perhaps, which you find it very hard to shake. I have this too.

Sun conj Saturn
Did you have a very hard relationship with your father?

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I remember at least one instance where my mother knowingly betrayed my trust, and afterward I felt that I could no longer confide anything with her. There may have been similar instances that I've buried, blocked out of my memory or simply forgotten.

The first time my family moved, I felt abandoned and betrayed. I did not want to go; I remember threatening suicide if I could not stay. I lost all my friends, and I've only found one or two friends in the 15 or so years since then.

I've never felt close to either of my parents. I never felt that I could connect with them; I felt that they would not understand and respect my feelings -- much less support them and encourage me to express them.

I just don't trust anyone anymore. I don't even trust myself; I don't know who I am. The lesson I seem to have learned from those traumatic experiences in my youth seems to be that no one will understand or accept my emotions; that I cannot depend on anyone else for support.

This is as good a place as any to mention that I have most, if not all, the symptoms of schizoid personality disorder.

What was your childhood like?

quote:

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Anyway, you love fun, creativity, and romance and your goals are to pursue 5th House activities.

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I feel like I don't know how to have fun; that I've lost the ability to enjoy anything, to take pleasure in anything.

When I was younger, I was much more creative. I drew and sketched a lot, and I thought I'd like to be a designer of some kind. As I've gotten older, my perfectionist tendencies (Venus/Mars in Virgo?) make me reluctant to start a project unless I know how to do it properly, even if it's private and no one else will ever see it.

When I am alone, I feel profoundly lonely, and that has driven me to search for a partner, a relationship -- but I've had a few relationships in the past, and I rapidly lost interest in my partners and in the relationship itself. I feel like I wouldn't know what to do with another relationship if I had one. Those feelings tend to sabotage my desire/motivation and efforts to find another partner and start over.

My only real goal at the moment is money: climbing the ladder in my field and investing whatever I earn to achieve independent wealth. Everything else seems like a waste of time and effort.

quote:

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Do you write?

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I enjoy working out my thoughts and feelings into words, proofreading and editing the words to convey a clear, specific meaning and message. I have never written any articles or books. Occasionally I write long emails or posts, but I've found that most people only read the first or last sentence, or just the first few words, so my effort is wasted.

posted November 20, 2012 12:44 PM            

Back to you, though. Are you very charismatic, such that you could easily attract woman?

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 12:59 PM            

i left my coutry at a fairly early age

but i think the main deal was that i was forcefully taught to believe certain views and behave in a certain way (mother)...no other way was acceptable and any other views were wrong...only one source knew all the real answers

funny its in the house of faith as i have no faith....i think im becoming a bit nihilistic XD

posted November 20, 2012 01:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by doommlord:
pluto in the 9th in scorpio

i left my coutry at a fairly early age

but i think the main deal was that i was forcefully taught to believe certain views and behave in a certain way (mother)...no other way was acceptable and any other views were wrong...only one source knew all the real answers

funny its in the house of faith as i have no faith....i think im becoming a bit nihilistic XD

also i turned to doubt everything and anyone....and always search obssessivly for knowledge

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Makes sense DL! xx

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 01:23 PM            

I notice that in life, too. Some people are so hard to communicate with and you miss what they are trying to say. It can feel like quick sand.
Some people are super easy to communicate with based on the charts

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 01:34 PM            

I think you are naturally very charismatic. That is a strength, but this part of you has squares to other parts of your chart, thus stressing it and making it not work as it could.

I will go more deeply into that later.

I think a main problem for you is that you have super concentrated energy and much of it is Scorpio.

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 01:36 PM            

Then, you throw Saturn on that for a dose of low self esteem. and self doubt.

Does this feel like what you go through?

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 01:43 PM            

I think one big struggle is your Mars conj Venus( which is a super sexy aspect) but you have it squared your moon and NN.

This is another tie up of energy. I can see where you feel schizoid. I don't really believe in labels.

I think you have energy which is tightly squished next to other energy, so that you can't see straight.

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 01:46 PM            

I don't know if I am explaining it well.

Venus sq Moon may make you want to run away from love, as it seems like you can't find a place for it, within yourself.

Does any of this fit?

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 01:50 PM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 20, 2012 07:12 PM            

I've definitely had a lot of ups and downs in romance, thanks to my 5th and 7th house planets romance has been (maybe too much of) a focus in my life, but I'd like to think I am evolving and learning more about myself in the process

In addition to romance I think Pluto here also influences other 5th house matters of creativity and self expression. I was raised to explore my creative "talents", but working them into my life now is usually all or nothing, and I've faced some powerful blocks in these areas.

For example I played the viola for 6 years in elementary/middle school, but had to stop when I transferred to public school which did not have an orchestra. I was very dedicated and really loved playing and felt it was the most powerful way of getting in touch with my emotions and expressing a part of my soul lol. If I would have stuck with it I strongly believe it would be a large part of my life now, maybe something I would try to do professionally if I was good enough..

posted November 20, 2012 08:04 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:

Are you very charismatic, such that you could easily attract woman?

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Short answer: No. I'm not the type to chat up women. I usually avoid strangers, no matter how attractive they are or how friendly they may seem. I'm not shy -- if I ever was, working in customer service jobs for 5-6 years cured me of that. I just don't know what I want, and I don't know what to talk about. It's not so bad when I'm at work, but out in public, I act and feel very withdrawn and defensive.

I don't think I receive any special, unsolicited attention from women. If I do, I'm too naive or blind or absorbed in my own thoughts to notice.

quote:

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Originally posted by doommlord:

but i think the main deal was that i was forcefully taught to believe certain views and behave in a certain way (mother)...no other way was acceptable and any other views were wrong...only one source knew all the real answers

funny its in the house of faith as i have no faith....i think im becoming a bit nihilistic XD

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I was raised in the Catholic church. Throughout my childhood, I was encouraged (or ordered) to pray and devote time to God. I never felt any connection with God, so I gave up and stopped going to church some time between ages 16-18. My stellium in the 9th house might indicate this in some way, but I'm not sure how it works. My parents invited and encouraged me to return to church but they never forced it on me, and I never went back.

When I was younger, I told my mother that I had noticed boys and girls flirting and kissing each other at school. I wasn't experiencing any romantic desires at that point; I was just curious. My mother told me very sternly and clearly that such behavior was wrong and she never wanted to hear that I was doing that kind of thing or I would be in trouble. Even as a child, I was already cautious around other people; her response enforced my natural defensiveness and made things even worse. I never learned how to be comfortable with the opposite sex in the context of romance or relationships.

quote:

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Originally posted by doommlord:

also i turned to doubt everything and anyone....and always search obssessivly for knowledge

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I joke with my family and friends that I don't have any hobbies; I have temporary obsessions. I'll stumble across something that interests me, like wristwatches, and research that topic for weeks until I've found the best, most reliable, accurate, rugged, functional, most affordable model... and then I'll lose interest for no particular reason and forget about the whole thing. And I won't buy the watch I picked out, because I don't really need one -- I have a phone with a clock on it -- so it would be a waste of money.

Some of that is Scorpio and Pluto energy at work; the process of elimination, not just shopping for watches, but stripping all the dead weight out of one's life and getting down to the bare essentials.

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:

Your Mars sq Moon would make for an angry feeling as your heart and your drives which includes anger and aggression are in a lock, such that you can't seem to make them part of one complete whole. IOW, it is hard for you to feel your emotions and be angry. These two tie each other up.

I don't know if I am explaining it well.

Venus sq Moon may make you want to run away from love, as it seems like you can't find a place for it, within yourself.

Does any of this fit?

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I experience consuming loneliness and longing for companionship (Sun in Scorpio conjunct Pluto, Venus in the 8th house?) -- but then I remind myself that I don't need a relationship to survive, and I bitterly remember that I didn't make any effort to maintain a relationship when I had one, so why bother looking for another one? I resign myself, again, to being alone for the rest of my life. That drastic block against my emotional needs, the defeat of desires by logic, might be indicated by the stack of four (?!) T-squares I have between the Moon, Venus/Mars and Jupiter/Uranus. It could be influenced by my desire for authenticity and my sense of responsibility, indicated by Saturn in Scorpio -- and with Capricorn Rising, Saturn is my chart ruler. Or the perfectionism of Mars in Virgo. Or my Midheaven in Scorpio -- I don't know who I am, and I don't know what I want. How will I be able to find a partner and build a fulfulling relationship when I don't know what the hell I'm doing?

People greet each other with the question, "How are you?" I hate that question. I immediately look inward; how *am* I doing right now? I try to be honest, and the honest answer would usually be "lousy". Recently, the answer would be "really, really lousy -- you should see my natal chart, and my Saturn return just started". But I know that no one wants to hear about that stuff; they don't want to hear all the doom and gloom and negativity. If they really meant it as a question, the only answer they wanted to hear is, "I'm fine, thanks. How are you?" Is that what I should say instead, knowing that it's a lie? Or maybe they didn't mean it as a question at all; it was just a greeting. I can't decide how to answer, and I end up saying nothing at all, and hating myself for it. Someone asked me this question via email a few days ago; I spent 45 minutes trying to answer. I picked a response, thought about how honest it was and how it might be received, scrapped it and started over about 10 times before I gave up and went to bed. Digging, digging, digging to find perfection and truth and harmony when they simply can't coexist. Where is this overanalysis and insane self-censorship coming from in my chart? There are so many choices: Sun square Ascendant, Mercury in Libra, Mercury square Ascendant, Mercury conjunct Saturn, Mercury conjunct Pluto, Pluto square Ascendant...

My family and friends tell me, "You're a good person, you should be able to find a girlfriend easily. She looks nice, try to go talk to her." Haha... ahhh... if they only knew. I bet the psychologists could fill an entire shelf full of books with all the crap they'd find in my head. I know I'm screwed up; I'm not going to lie about it. I wouldn't date me. Why would anyone else want to?

People are different. Fractally different. That's the single most important thing I've learned from studying astrology; I knew it all along, intuitively, long before I got into astrology, but astrology picked it up and hurled it in my face and made it blatantly obvious. As I look closer at parts of my own life, my own personality, experiences, attitudes and motivations and fears... I realize how little I know about myself. For every thing I discover, I sense a thousand more things I still don't know or don't understand. We can be different from each other in ways that we cannot comprehend, to depths that we cannot fathom. How well do we know ourselves? Can we trust ourselves? If we don't know who we are, how can we ever hope to know and understand and trust each other?

This is most definitely Scorpio and Pluto talking. Life is a question mark. I've been living inside that question mark for a long time; I don't know how much longer I can keep living that way. I want to turn that question mark into a period, a fullstop -- or better yet, an exclamation point. (Sun in Scorpio -- all or nothing; go big or go home.) Can I? Will I? This is my Saturn return... time will tell.

posted November 20, 2012 08:28 PM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted November 21, 2012 01:13 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Blackbird:
When I was younger, I told my mother that I had noticed boys and girls flirting and kissing each other at school. I wasn't experiencing any romantic desires at that point; I was just curious. My mother told me very sternly and clearly that such behavior was wrong and she never wanted to hear that I was doing that kind of thing or I would be in trouble. Even as a child, I was already cautious around other people; her response enforced my natural defensiveness and made things even worse. I never learned how to be comfortable with the opposite sex in the context of romance or relationships.

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same response is here XD
never had trouble with woman as friends though... i seperated my mother from my life as much as i could/can

quote:

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Originally posted by Blackbird:
I joke with my family and friends that I don't have any hobbies; I have temporary obsessions. I'll stumble across something that interests me, like wristwatches, and research that topic for weeks until I've found the best, most reliable, accurate, rugged, functional, most affordable model... and then I'll lose interest for no particular reason and forget about the whole thing. And I won't buy the watch I picked out, because I don't really need one -- I have a phone with a clock on it -- so it would be a waste of money.

Some of that is Scorpio and Pluto energy at work; the process of elimination, not just shopping for watches, but stripping all the dead weight out of one's life and getting down to the bare essentials.

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posted November 21, 2012 01:14 AM            

if you want i have a huge article on pluto in the 9th (maybe you read it) and i can post it here for you