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Author Topic:   I do know now what I'm doing

Posts: 85
From: Paraguay
Registered: Sep 2014

posted September 10, 2015 01:32 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for LF DX     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Good night, now that the time and circunstances happened more this is the right time to express what this woman has did to me

This is the second part of the story expressed here

Back then it was just glances and a strong feeling, and the day it started was June 21st, the day that venus retrograde started.

As the days went by, I had an emotional block that I couldn't reach to her, when with other girls I could speak, text, or have some fun (as friends), it almost made me pretty crazy.

Took me like a month to reach her again when her group of friends played in a show and I played with them and have some fun, as the moment that I have the chance to speak with her, and I've noticed a spark of attraction of her towards me, or that's what I thought, and gradually I was getting very infatuated with her, with every conversation we had, as we had a lot of similar tastes and life directions, but with the big difference of her being from a strong, stable but kinda conservative and religious family, and me from a very dysfunctional, troublesome, but kinda liberal family (after many years), something of her just pierced me very deep. With a lot of dreams of her constantly.

But as soon as I felt we talked and felt a deep sense of bonding, we ended up totally disconnected from each other, it was very frustrating not being able to keep up talking more with her, and of course, those fears that made me not text her, the simple chit-chat, I couldn't do it, I felt blocked.

Then as soon as I got her number, and the chance to finally doing things together as she told me then, I got a dream which unfortunately I can't remember it, but it caused me a powerful anxiety that made want to move foward to her, but then she slowly, was retreating away.

And last saturday, after meeting her family, playing a song that I did for her (thank god no one around knew english to understand it), but having a hard time spending time with her, until the end of the night that we had another deep conversation of our dreams, hopes, family stories, and more, I've found out in a subtle way that she has a boyfriend, someone I knew was close to her, but not that close until that day.

And that's it, too fast, too much, too soon, venus retrograde, the same old story about controlling my scorpio stellium. But I'll admit that woman did pierced me deeply, very deeply. I'll just try now let things flow peacefully, because I'm still going to hang out a lot with her and her friends, because our bands play together in shows, and I'm already friends with everybody, I just have to keep it well contained. don't know how, but I'll do it

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Posts: 85
From: Paraguay
Registered: Sep 2014

posted September 10, 2015 01:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for LF DX     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
And a final double post with the synastry, composite and natals

My TOB: Not really exact, the time was on my baby book, so I took it as the official.

Hers: Still don't know exactly, but it's quite accurate

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Posts: 4807
From: Tinseltown, Hollyweird, The Multiverse
Registered: Sep 2014

posted September 10, 2015 03:45 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Aubyanne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Astrotwins can be some of our longest running soulmates -- so long as they're same-sex. Opposite sex, sometimes, though it tends to follow a romantic relationship that's cooled into a stable, platonic association. Even if some complicated feelings or longings linger, it's enough to be able to 'let go'.

I hope you're remaining friends. At the very least, it seems as if there's a strong connexion in the astral, with all the dream involvement.

I'm intrigued by the PLUTO-MARS conjunction you share, with your being MARS. I guess the chemistry can be quite intense for MARS. (In my relationship, I'm PLUTO.)

I suppose we should've known it'd be complicated, what with the NNODE-EROS-URANUS, and that mutual SATURN-VALENTINE, with your JUNO involved, eh? It's interesting, though, as it's your JUNO that's involved -- but not hers.

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Posts: 585
Registered: Mar 2015

posted September 10, 2015 05:59 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Soltze     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Venus-Uranus is also another issue there. Since you're Venus you got the short end of the stick so to say.

But yeah, you will remain in each others lives I guess. Aubyanne is so right about the nodes.

Two plutonians with a 1st-8th house connection, come on. That's deep and meaningful.
It feels more erotic and obssessive for the 8th house person though. I should know...when someone's sun hits my 8th, it can be extremely intense.

I hope you too can be friends in the future.

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Posts: 85
From: Paraguay
Registered: Sep 2014

posted September 10, 2015 02:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for LF DX     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
One of the most, if not the most recurring thing in my life is my unability of having interpersonal relationships with women (moon square mars natal), I only have one true lady friend in my life, a Pisces, and she has know me thru my lifetime, cause her mom was my nanny, and we still are like siblings, and that's it.

But this year I finally let myself more open, and I'm enjoying a lot with women, developing friendships, company, and a bit of playing around, and those things never happened before until this year, of course I never let very close to anyone, but at least it's a great progress, and that will grow more with time. And finally noticing their attraction towards me, and enjoying it, something that I felt unworthy and undeserving until now. Of course being a musician, and now poet does the job for me, hahaha.

One of the dreams I have with her was that she came in my room when I was sleeping and gave me a deep hug which made me feel unconfortable, so I grabbed her and put her on bed and we ended up cuddling, sleeping together. That caused me a lot of... emotion.

The thing with this woman was that the attraction I feel is very powerful, and since the day I met her, I wanted to do it slowly, cause she's the kind of woman that it's worth it doing it that way, I wanted to know her, how she is, what she likes, her dreams and visions, but I felt blocked, I couldn't make myself to show up my interest, and when she was interested, in a subtle way I push her back, and never really talk with her in an online way, just face to face. But the bond is there, but now it's in thin ice.

It was very powerful, and I was scared to go wild, still am, took me a long time to finally go for her, but when I decided that, it was too late.

The more I knew her, the more she told me her life, dreams, goals, visions, musical tastes, how her family is, all those things did quite a thing to me, and it made me see her as the one that I'd look forward to have a future together as a couple, so it will be VERY HARD to stay as friends, at least until this feeling cools off, cause since the very first day I sense that we were meant to be a couple, but unfortunately, it didn't happen.

But I'll be lying if I say that I don't see her in my life, or that we wouldn't be close.

And the way I found out that she was not single anymore was that when her brother gave me a ride to my home, she ended up sitting with her boyfriend, cuddling, and that's it. So nothing really troublesome happened. Things can go on, but keeping things cool enough to be around.

And how the dynamics are in your relationship @Aubyanne, and what's the meaning of Eros and Uranus, and Saturn and Valentine? I still don't get it right the power the asteroids have in astrology, and I'd love to hear it please, cause I sense they are really karmic.

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