posted May 04, 2016 11:24 AM            

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Originally posted by yungang_grotto:
Also Faith I big time hear you re: fears being projected and magnified. Those ill treatments unfortunately do tend to stick with us more sometimes... that's the negative power of fear/shadow based mentalities, unclaimed or rejected aspects of ourselves... which i know quite well myself... it is a sticking point...

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Thanks for your understanding.

Good side of it is, it's within our control, if we just develop that control.

posted May 04, 2016 02:05 PM            

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Originally posted by meyray:

[b]Virgo DSC
You fear that your SO will never truly love you or express their love for you. That they will eventually turn cold and critical and your relationship will feel like an obligation. That they will judge you and make you feel pathetic and not good enough.

Thoughts?[/B]

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posted May 04, 2016 02:16 PM            

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Originally posted by Faith:
Thanks for your understanding.

Good side of it is, it's within our control, if we just develop that control.

I like having spiritual goals so it's best for me not to evolve completely all at once. That leaves projects to be working on, still.

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oh yes wouldn't want it to all be wrapped up and just blissfully joyful! Lol..

Must keep things interesting.. goals can be more satisfying than accomplishments heh... do we both have some Capricorn talking here?

posted May 04, 2016 02:24 PM            

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Originally posted by meyray:
Some time ago when I was in an introspective mood I did some soul-searching and came to an interesting conclusion about myself and I want to see if this applies to others.

We all know about the Descendant and what it means for relationships. Every beginner entering the branch of synastry hears the same thing ad nauseum – the DSC is your ideal partner, look at the DSC, the DSC this, the DSC that. The Descendant is externalized so much that we forget that it is still a part of [b]us. And everyone paints it in a positive light but, like all things, it too carries a shadow.

My theory is that your deepest subconscious fears about love reflect the shadow of your Descendant sign. And these fears become very apparent if your DSC has afflictions and your love planets receive hits in the chart as well. What I came to realize about myself, when I was brutally honest about my fear is that what I dread the most are all things befitting my DSC sign.

Now obviously all of the information below are things most people won’t tolerate but I’m talking about an immediate knee-jerk reaction, a pattern that always seems to be in the back of your head as a creeping suspicion. Fears that may be completely baseless in reality but you just can’t shake them off.

Also you, yourself may end up exhibiting this behavior but you would never ever admit it to yourself or even realize you’re doing it so you project it on to others.

What I managed to learn from this realization is that when you start seeing this behavior in your partner or expect it from them, instead of trying to fend it off you need to realize that it’s not real. It’s a mirage that comes from within.

Here is what I would imagine it would be for every Descendant:

Aries DSC
You fear that your SO will be impulsive and make careless decisions that will hurt you, that they will be selfish, unfaithful, put themselves first and get bored of you. In the worst cases that they may be violent and aggressive.

Taurus DSC
You fear that your SO will be hedonistic and indulgent (for sex, wealth or something else) and in the end always do what they please despite you. Also that they will be totalitarian, stubborn and you will always be the one to step down for their needs and wants.

Gemini DSC
You fear that your SO will always lie to you and be completely unreliable in life. That you will never really be “enough” for them and they will always have one foot outside the door – be it emotionally, sexually or about something else.

Cancer DSC
You fear that your SO will be emotionally underdeveloped and you will have to be the parent in the relationship. That they will be a “loser” and act like a suffocating dependent child always in need of something, emotionally manipulating and blackmailing you.

Leo DSC
You fear that your SO will never love you for who you are but only as an extension of themselves. That they will be arrogant, demanding and oblivious to your needs and desires. That they love the attention they get more than you.

Virgo DSC
You fear that your SO will never truly love you or express their love for you. That they will eventually turn cold and critical and your relationship will feel like an obligation. That they will judge you and make you feel pathetic and not good enough.

Libra DSC
You fear that your SO will be fake and their love is a faηade. That they will only be with you as long as everything is okay but will turn the moment push comes to shove. That they love all the perks of the relationship but not really you.

Scorpio DSC
You fear that your SO will be cruel and try to dominate you. That they will eventually show a very ugly side and start playing with your heart, demanding too much from you but not holding up to those standards themselves.

Sagittarius DSC
You fear that your SO will never commit to you. That they will always put their own freedom and pleasure above you and run away from responsibility. That their “love” is only for the thrill they feel from it and it doesn’t matter if it’s you or someone else.

Capricorn DSC
You fear that your SO will be cold and dominating. That they have ulterior motives and a heartless practical approach to love, meaning they won’t feel anything if you’re upset or the relationship ended. That they will have no problem disposing of you, if you aren’t useful anymore.

Aquarius DSC
You fear that your SO will be hypocritical, detached, uncommitted and not spare your feelings about it one bit. That they will invalidate all your needs and leave you voiceless in the relationship with a feeling of being unimportant.

Pisces DSC
You fear that your SO will have a weak character and turn to cheap and immediate thrills to escape from their problems. That they can’t face reality, do things that hurt you and make themselves out to be the victim in the end.

I want to see if people find this relatable because it was an epiphany moment for me. All my fears align with the shadow of Sagittarius but I also have Saturn square DSC and Pluto conjunct DSC so the Descendant expressing itself negatively may be more specific to me than for people in general.

Thoughts?[/B]

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posted May 04, 2016 06:42 PM            

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Originally posted by Belage:
The house of open enemies would not give us irrational fears but rational fears. Open enemies are easier to deal with than hidden enemies.

When I think about irrational fears, I think more of the 12th house because we have a hard time accessing 12th house matters. 8th house is also another house which can give us irrational fears because it is the deepest and darkest house after the 12th house.

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posted May 04, 2016 07:53 PM            

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Originally posted by mar1982delta:
Well, yes, 12th house is "darker", as it is linked with our sub/unconscious, among others, but still it's a common opinion that the Dsc is about our projections and our shadow, since it's opposite our Ascendant! And the 7th is the house we meet other people in equal terms, too, so both have their value imo!

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posted May 04, 2016 08:23 PM            

I seem to be in the minority, but I don't actually relate to the description here (sorry!)

Taurus DSC
You fear that your SO will be hedonistic and indulgent (for sex, wealth or something else) and in the end always do what they please despite you. Also that they will be totalitarian, stubborn and you will always be the one to step down for their needs and wants.

I see these traits as unattractive, but not something I fear. More of an annoyance. This type of SO would likely be someone I'd just walk away from and not give it too much thought tbh. We obviously want different things. I must say though, I don't see myself ever fearing a sexually hedonistic partner In fact, I feel quite at home with someone with such lascivious tendencies...

I have Sun conj Merc in Taurus in the 6H. So maybe this has something to do with not really fearing negative Taurus energy (since I embody it too sometimes!).

Sagittarius DSC
...That they will always put their own freedom and pleasure above you and run away from responsibility. That their “love” is only for the thrill they feel from it and it doesn’t matter if it’s you or someone else.

This is ABSOLUTELY my biggest relationship fear. I fear the cold/vapidness of this kind of SO...how this kind of person can invalidate your feelings/wants/needs emotionally/physically/spiritually by always chasing the experience of it all instead of choosing to stick it out and see what's really there - the good, the bad, and the ugly. Being abandoned and not being valued as an individual are my biggest fears in all types of relationships.

posted May 04, 2016 08:59 PM            

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Originally posted by Belage:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by mar1982delta:
[b] Well, yes, 12th house is "darker", as it is linked with our sub/unconscious, among others, but still it's a common opinion that the Dsc is about our projections and our shadow, since it's opposite our Ascendant! And the 7th is the house we meet other people in equal terms, too, so both have their value imo!

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Perhaps I would like a better delineation in the description of the signs fears. Too many of them fit for me so reading my particular descendant description did not feel any special. [/B][/QUOTE]

posted May 05, 2016 07:46 PM            

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Scorpio DSC
You fear that your SO will be cruel and try to dominate you. That they will eventually show a very ugly side and start playing with your heart, demanding too much from you but not holding up to those standards themselves.

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posted May 07, 2016 09:28 AM            

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Originally posted by nordicsoul:
i did not feel identified with the scorpio DC. probably because i have neptune there and that is the type of people I attract.. all neptunian, not plutonian.

I do not like to be dominated, that is true, but not sure that is a fear I have because I have never attracted a dominant partner. actually I tend to be the dominant one. probably because of my moon pluto square I am familiar and at home with plutonian energy and dont project it too much.

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posted May 07, 2016 11:16 AM            

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Originally posted by meyray:
Gemini DSC
You fear that your SO will always lie to you and be completely unreliable in life. That you will never really be “enough” for them and they will always have one foot outside the door – be it emotionally, sexually or about something else.
[/B]

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posted May 07, 2016 11:19 AM            

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Originally posted by VirgoPILL:
wow meyray!

gemini dsc, these fears came to reality once but was enough for me to subconsciously reject or work against to be in a serious relationship since then. this is obviously sabotaging myself but i'm working on it to turn around. also, these fears make me quite paranoid in friendships and other relations.

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posted May 09, 2016 11:01 PM            

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Originally posted by yungang_grotto:
oh yes wouldn't want it to all be wrapped up and just blissfully joyful! Lol..

Must keep things interesting.. goals can be more satisfying than accomplishments heh... do we both have some Capricorn talking here?

I wonder about whether we have control and what exactly we have control over but I'm happy to hear you say that we have some and can develop it. It is empowering. I like having the reins of at least my own emotional reactions/re-patterning...

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posted May 10, 2016 05:22 PM            

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Originally posted by meyray:

Aquarius DSC
You fear that your SO will be hypocritical, detached, uncommitted and not spare your feelings about it one bit. That they will invalidate all your needs and leave you voiceless in the relationship with a feeling of being unimportant.

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This is very very true in my case!