posted October 21, 2019 05:06 AM            

I already posted these charts years ago, and he is in fact the reason why I joined this forum in the beginning and why I started studying astrology more seriously since then!

Long story short, he is a younger boy I met in 2014; there was an instant spark between us but for various reasons (one was me being in a committed rel.) we went out one day just a couple of years later. It was strange and intense, in a few hours it all went from 0 to 100, with him asking me at the end of the night if I was in love with him.
We tried to be intimate, but it was so unexpected and strange that we stopped talking from that night on (just staring at each other from time to time, since we lived in the same dormitory for 2 years!).

He lives in another country where I was staying just a few months every year, so I left and then I came back, I saw him one last time, then I added him on social media after a year, we went on talking for another year and a half on social medias, with some romantic/sexual innuendo (in a passionate-indirect-Scorpio fashion ), and sharing some personal info as if we were going to know each other better. We also talked openly about what had happened between us and we talked normally from that moment on.

Unique connection for me, I still think about him, I still feel the pull to talk with him, to see him, to be in his presence. The last time we talked it was 5 months ago, he was the one to initiate the contact.

But what worries me and makes me a little obsessed now is that the contacts are somewhat rare; he knows that I was in a rel. in the last months and this could be a reason. On my part, I still feel the same pull after 5 years. I've been dreaming of him for 5 years.
The feeling I get when I talk to him I don't get it with anyone else.
According to you, is there any astrological reason for the decrease in communication in the last year?

I'm especially interested in whatever you notice, but especially in that synastry Pluto-Venus/Venus-North node-Ascendant conjunction in his and my 1st house, with our 2 Venuses being also the rulers of our South nodes, and his Venus and my Venus being also our Asc/Dsc rulers.
Never had these conjunctions with anyone!

He is also the only one with whom I share a (little bit wide) Eros-Psyche conjunction in synastry and Eros-Psyche aspect in Davison.

One last thing, if possible, I would like to hear your opinion about that packed 8th house in Davison, since I've rarely seen a similar chart before.

I really thank you in advance if you have got time to have a look at this

syn http://imgur.com/a/QFPCKJI

compo http://imgur.com/a/47OWZcd

davi http://imgur.com/a/YcJpD97

posted October 21, 2019 06:09 PM            

what a beautiful story... and it reminded me so much of mine with my impossible love! So, I'm amazed that you and me keep sharing such similar patterns/struggles !

First off, it seems that he started to "detach" or "gave up" about one year ago, as soon as transit SN was hitting Composite NN, and when it went through Composite Saturn together with transit Saturn in 3rd house, so this is when he might have quitted the connection, ... At this moment transit Saturn is conjunct to Composite Jupiter while SN is heading Neptune, with NN hitting Composite Moon, so this is why you're feeling this intensely and wondering about him at this moment. Also, transit Jupiter is conjunct Sun/Mercury, so I wouldnt rule out that you might establish a new temporary connection in a close time, but as soon as transit SN leaves Neptune and tr Saturn leaves Jupiter, he might disappear again and you might even start to "forget" him.

Unfortunately, Composite Saturn and North Node are square to the Ascendant, and Chiron/SN are conjunct MC, so this to me looks like an intense platonic love, maybe unattainable :-(

Yes, there is no 12th house, but the Sun in Sagittarius, a neptunian placement, and Chiron conjunct SN clearly gives a fated feeling. Also, the Moon in 9th house suggests that there is a "learning" link between you two, in dealing with your plutonian emotions, in fact it is trine to Venus/Pluto in Scorpio... so, to me, this is what this powerful connection is meant for.
In the synastry, you have a strong idealization of each other. For you, he hits you emotionally in a unique way as you said, your Venus/Pluto conjunct his NN/PLuto is trine to your Jupiter/Mars and this is square to your Chiron/Moon, so this is all very intense and hits you at your subconscious level but at intellectual level as well and this obviously impressed you. I think you dream of him cause his Vertex is conjunct your Chiron/Moon in 8th house, so this is very hard for you to let go and stop envisioning him in your future. Also, his Moon and MC fall in your 10th house trine to your Mercury/Saturn in 2nd house, so this might give you the strong feeling of an unbreakable bond or of a stable presence in your life, whereas natally you seem to struggle in finding such an emotional stability... Since your Chiron and Moon are in your 8th house opposite your Saturn, you add quite intense feelings to your wishes for romantic stability, and he undoubtedly triggered this subconscious thirst of yours. This all picture does not involve only a plutonian energy, but also Mercury, cause your Sun in third house is square to his Chiron in Virgo, and your Chiron is in Gemini opposite his Eros... Mercury looks pretty stable in Composite 2nd house and forms the Grand trine with Chiron/MC/SN, so this looks like that communication is your strong link...

Don't know what to suggest my friend, as I said transits might be favourable for a new connection in short time, but since SN is heading to Comp. Neptune and then Uranus, I would not expect too much to happen in the long run.

posted October 22, 2019 08:43 AM            

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Originally posted by Stoika7:
Hi dear Chaitaly ❤️

what a beautiful story... and it reminded me so much of mine with my impossible love! So, I'm amazed that you and me keep sharing such similar patterns/struggles !

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Yes it's becoming really interesting! I'm glad if the story resonates, even if it's an "impossible" sort of love sigh... But were you and the guy together in a rel.?

quote:

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First off, it seems that he started to "detach" or "gave up" about one year ago, as soon as transit SN was hitting Composite NN, and when it went through Composite Saturn together with transit Saturn in 3rd house, so this is when he might have quitted the connection, ... At this moment transit Saturn is conjunct to Composite Jupiter while SN is heading Neptune, with NN hitting Composite Moon, so this is why you're feeling this intensely and wondering about him at this moment.

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So, I could feel the "detachment" almost 1 year ago, it was towards June 2018.
By the way I was the one who detached too, because I started a relationship (as you know ) in October 2018, and till June 2019 I was committed so I didn't think about him as usual, but....
But very strange things happen... almost 4-5 months ago I started thinking about him intensely out of nowhere, I could clearly feel a sort of dense energy coming, and in fact on the 3rd day while I was in this odd emotional and mental state he reached out -that was the energy I felt, it was him coming!- and we could "update" each other on each other's lives... it was so nice!
This was the last time we talked and he was the one who made the contact first.

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Also, transit Jupiter is conjunct Sun/Mercury, so I wouldnt rule out that you might establish a new temporary connection in a close time, but as soon as transit SN leaves Neptune and tr Saturn leaves Jupiter, he might disappear again and you might even start to "forget" him.

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It's always been on and off, with us making contact and then disappearing, it has not been stable - ever. I could "forget" him for a while when I was in this last relationship because I was fulfilled on some level, BUT the issue is that as soon as I ended it, after little time, thoughts about him start flooding my mind, and I feel again this pull, a sort of yearning, to feel him or talk to him or to know what he is up to - or simply if he's fine, doing well etc.

It's so painful to be in this state and I don't understand why I have to feel like this NOW. Probably as you said transits are triggering these emotions. Just to be clear, it's INSANE... thinking about the possibility of not talking to him anymore made me cry tonight.

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Unfortunately, Composite Saturn and North Node are square to the Ascendant, and Chiron/SN are conjunct MC, so this to me looks like an intense platonic love, maybe unattainable :-(

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We tried to be intimate and we could be "physical" for a moment, but I know and he knows that there's something impossible in this situation - then mind the age gap, the distance, our commitments, etc. There are just a lot of obstacles between us, it is already a lot that we could make it real for one night - and I confessed my feelings too.

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Yes, there is no 12th house, but the Sun in Sagittarius, a neptunian placement, and Chiron conjunct SN clearly gives a fated feeling. Also, the Moon in 9th house suggests that there is a "learning" link between you two, in dealing with your plutonian emotions, in fact it is trine to Venus/Pluto in Scorpio... so, to me, this is what this powerful connection is meant for.

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This is interesting, what do you mean by neptunian placement?
Yes we clearly had to deal with the Venus-Pluto dynamic, the push-pull and intense attraction.

[QUOTE]
In the synastry, you have a strong idealization of each other.
Also, his Moon and MC fall in your 10th house trine to your Mercury/Saturn in 2nd house, so this might give you the strong feeling of an unbreakable bond or of a stable presence in your life...
[QUOTE]

What do you mean by strong idealization?
Yes probably in a certain sense in the past we idealized what we could be for each other... but maybe we're losing hope (personally I'm not -not totally- even if it's just about seeing him again).

posted October 22, 2019 02:37 PM            

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Yes it's becoming really interesting! I'm glad if the story resonates, even if it's an "impossible" sort of love sigh... But were you and the guy together in a rel.?

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We should pull out a synastry for you and me, lol
No, I wasn't ! And he doesnt even know about my feelings for him. I met him three years ago and I never forgot him. But a crazy telepathic connection started, driving me nuts, and this kept me "stuck" to him. The fact is that he "ghosted" me as soon as he dated someone (now he's got married with her), but still there's no way I can stop thinking about him... oh, I know so well what you feel ! :-(

The SN transit to Comp NN started exactly one year ago in October, that's when the switch happened with you dating someone else. and it kept going through the comp. 3rd house planets, back in June 2019 Mercury was hitting Composite SN, sextile Vertex and trine Psyche so maybe this is when you have been in contact again after you felt the "psychic" connection...

Comp. Vertex is also trine to NN, with Amor as the midpoint, so this is also why it looks like an "impossible" dream.

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What do you mean by strong idealization?

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I think that his Neptune/Uranus opposite your MC and square to your ASC/DSC and nodal axis gives a strong mutual idealization, as you might see each other as your ideal partner. Also, his Vertex on your Chiron/Moon midpoint/8th house and your Vertex on his Lilith/SN / 7th house, adds such an strong, subconscious, idealization and longing.

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This is interesting, what do you mean by neptunian placement?

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Sorry, this is my own theory and view, lol
I always associate Neptune to Sagittarius and the 9th house, cause Neptune was once considered as a "sub-ruler" of Sagittarius together with the ruler Jupiter... now this is a controversial point of view, but I'm still convinced that Sagittarius/9th house has an underlying neptunian energy (I believe so obviously cause I'm a Pisces ASC, lol)... in fact, Sag/9th house is often associated also to travels and idealization, like Neptune, an "higher mind"/Jungian philosophical trait, somehow psychic and boundless.

And, btw, his Neptune is square to your SN/ 12th house.

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it's INSANE... thinking about the possibility of not talking to him anymore made me cry tonight.

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Dont tell me about it. I experience such insanity and crying nights since more than three years! :-(

Why dont you give your insight for my insane impossible love ? I would love your take on it !
If you like, you can find my synastry and composite here http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum35/HTML/009396.html

(I see Todd has even used my thread as a "case study" about "how one can be overwhelmed by the infusion of nodal and vertex energies" in another thread, ahah )

❤️

posted October 22, 2019 05:42 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Stoika7:
[Also, his Vertex on your Chiron/Moon midpoint/8th house and your Vertex on his Lilith/SN / 7th house, adds such an strong, subconscious, idealization and longing.

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I've just noticed before posting these charts that his Venus-NN conjunction in Scorpio is on my Anti-Vertex!
I thought I had seen everything but still there are things to look at XD XD
Do you think it is just my longing or his longing as well? Well these are always such difficult questions aha
With Lilith there it seem pretty sexual more than romantic maybe...

Interestingly enough, in the last 2 conversations we had he mentioned the fact that he wants to come to Italy, and asteroid Italy is situated on his Venus-NN and is conjunct my Venus-Pluto as well, so I hope this is a sign that there's a trip to Italy in his future (North node) lol XD XD XD

I'm looking now at your charts and I'll be back telling you something I won't read the interpretations given to your charts till then

posted October 22, 2019 06:29 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Chaitaly:

I've just noticed before posting these charts that his Venus-NN conjunction in Scorpio is on my Anti-Vertex!
I thought I had seen everything but still there are things to look at XD XD
Do you think it is just my longing or his longing as well? Well these are always such difficult questions aha
With Lilith there it seem pretty sexual more than romantic maybe...

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Yes, the more you look at it, the more you see new things! I hadnt noticed the AntiVertex aspect either... well, this gives you even a more "otherworldly sexual" feeling. Also Lilith can be sexual, especially cause it falls in your 8th and square to your Eros! but it also hits his subconscious.
Since his Vertex is also strongly aspected in synastry, I guess he feels that too.

quote:

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Originally posted by Chaitaly:
Interestingly enough, in the last 2 conversations we had he mentioned the fact that he wants to come to Italy, and asteroid Italy is situated on his Venus-NN and is conjunct my Venus-Pluto as well, so I hope this is a sign that there's a trip to Italy in his future (North node) lol XD XD XD

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Where does "Italy" fall in Composite ?

quote:

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Originally posted by Chaitaly:
I'm looking now at your charts and I'll be back telling you something I won't read the interpretations given to your charts till then

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posted October 26, 2019 05:02 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Chaitaly:
I could "forget" him for a while when I was in this last relationship because I was fulfilled on some level, BUT the issue is that as soon as I ended it, after little time, thoughts about him start flooding my mind, and I feel again this pull, a sort of yearning, to feel him or talk to him or to know what he is up to - or simply if he's fine, doing well etc.

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This used to happen to me with an ex, let's call him "H". I could also forget him for a while whenever I entered a new relationship but as soon as the relationship ended, I also started to think and obssess over him again... I was in that state for 3 years. 3 years not being able to forget him, 3 years obssessing over him... until I met my previous ex, let's call him "S". He made me forget "H" in less than a week lol and I'm not exaggerating! We grew close very quickly and the connection I had with "S" was so strong that it helped me heal and move on... And I'm forever thankful to him for that, honestly. Breaking up with "S" was hard but necessary for both of us and now I've decided to let go of him too. What I had with him was a karmic and healing relationship.

But even if "S" and I are not together anymore, I haven't got back to thinking about "H" again. I even saw him again after months and I felt nothing for him.

posted November 03, 2019 12:45 PM            

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Originally posted by nezumi-chan:
This used to happen to me with an ex, let's call him "H". I could also forget him for a while whenever I entered a new relationship but as soon as the relationship ended, I also started to think and obssess over him again... I was in that state for 3 years. 3 years not being able to forget him, 3 years obssessing over him... until I met my previous ex, let's call him "S". He made me forget "H" in less than a week lol and I'm not exaggerating! We grew close very quickly and the connection I had with "S" was so strong that it helped me heal and move on... And I'm forever thankful to him for that, honestly. Breaking up with "S" was hard but necessary for both of us and now I've decided to let go of him too. What I had with him was a karmic and healing relationship.

But even if "S" and I are not together anymore, I haven't got back to thinking about "H" again. I even saw him again after months and I felt nothing for him.

So yep gurl, stopping the obssession is totally possible! So stay strong and don't lose hope! I'm sure you can too! I truly hope you eventually stop obssessing over him. Sending you good vibes ♡♡♡

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