|
Author
|
Topic: cold hearted B_____
|
shop22much
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
|
posted September 23, 2005 10:13 PM
  
.IP: Logged |
future_uncertain
Knowflake Posts: 193
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted September 23, 2005 10:54 PM
First of all, why do you think you act this way?I was the same way for a long time, then one day I had the realization that one of the most important (and one of the only) things I learned in my family is not true: Everyone is out to get you. They're not. It's been six years since I realized this was my mode of thinking and I still get defensive more easily than I would like and I tend to be the meanest to the people I love the most. I'm not nearly as bad as I used to be, but I still have room to grow.  Maybe this helps you and maybe it doesn't. Sounds to me like you need to dig into yourself. You are the one responsible, as I see you have already realized. Where does that take you from here?  IP: Logged |
aqua
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Oct 2009
|
posted September 24, 2005 02:52 AM
hey shop22much!!!
take it easy honey!!don't underestimate urself!!!!it happens with everyone.
and please remember aries have good qualities too!!! weather its the moon or the sun.its just that you have to let the good win over bad. take ur time ,relax ,take a deep breath.....aah.. that's better now. now think of what can be done further and please don't repent of what has happened.analyse the situation .and its only u who can know it better and u can and only sovle the problem. take ur time search the whole lot of urself and u'll know that there is anwer there inside ; within ur self. IP: Logged |
Svetlana
unregistered
|
posted September 24, 2005 09:26 AM
You are who you are. Why do you really want to change? So you could please others? You think then they won't leave you? There's so many women who are kind and nice and do everything "right" and... lonely. And there's as many b***s who are greatly loved by their friends and their men. Those who really love you would love no matter what.------------------
We are the ones we've been waiting for. IP: Logged |
future_uncertain
Knowflake Posts: 193
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted September 24, 2005 09:39 AM
Sweetie, this is what you said: quote:
I am so conflicted, I pushed people away...usually the very ones I know who I can/do care for deeply...and If they dont do what I say, I become bitter, childlish, demanding, and cut them off....
I always have this "my way or no way" attitude...
If this is how you want to be, then by all means, go ahead. But if you view your behavior and attitude as negative, and you wish to grow and change, then you will only hurt yourself by using the excuse "This is just how I am." I think Svetlana brings up a good point when she says there are too many people, especially women, who give too much of themselves to please others. However, there is a huge gap between doormat and b*tch and you have the option of deciding where you choose to be on that continuum. And Aqua is right when she says not to be so hard on yourself. At least you recognize that sometimes the problem might be you. (This isn't my judgement on you, mind you, I'm only going by what you've said.) Good luck, Dear! IP: Logged |
Yang
unregistered
|
posted September 24, 2005 02:41 PM
I say that if you really want to change, first take a deep look at yourself, find out why you are this way, and take the steps to adjust the ways of yourself. Perhaps this may need therapy, perhaps not.
 IP: Logged |
Solane Star
Newflake Posts: 0
From: Canada
Registered: Aug 2010
|
posted September 24, 2005 03:29 PM
Really well said and felt future_unccertain!!!
Solane Star 
IP: Logged |
Tigerlily
Knowflake Posts: 59
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted September 24, 2005 07:50 PM
I agree. future_uncertain, you said it perfectly. Kudos for your eloquence.IP: Logged |
Yang
unregistered
|
posted September 25, 2005 02:25 AM
How are you feeling?
IP: Logged |
shop22much
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
|
posted September 25, 2005 03:16 PM
.IP: Logged |
pixelpixie
Newflake Posts: 8
From: ON Canada
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted September 25, 2005 05:23 PM
Moderation in most things for sure....My friends know me as a very kind person.. I will go out of my way for most people..
But they also know if someone doesn't give me the same courtesy, I will call them on it.
You don't have to be a bi*** to be taken seriously.
There is a middle line in all things.
Be assertive when you need to be, and go with the flow-y when you don't.
You'll know when you've crossed your internal boundaries. There is always apologies and ammends if you feel you've crossed that line, right?
And like you said.. the ones that are worth it will know that you are worth it as well. IP: Logged |
Stargazer
Knowflake Posts: 45
From: just left of center
Registered: May 2009
|
posted September 25, 2005 06:00 PM
shop22muchWe are virgos... we are always weeding out something... try to relax.. its natural.
I too want my way ... am frustrated when i don't get it and can't figure out why everybody doesn't think like me... I've lost a few friends along the way.. but always feel better saying i'm sorry to those i have verbally beaten up! They say Virgo/Aries are verbal sleeping tigers you don't want to awaken. We have flash-fire temperments and take everything personally.
Its okay to speak before you think sometimes. My true friends cherish me for this quality. I leave them saying "oh my" a lot of the time but what would they do without the keen mind of a virgo- So again... try to relax and stretch beyond what feels comfortable- I know for me, this sometimes means getting out of my own way...lol IP: Logged |
future_uncertain
Knowflake Posts: 193
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted September 25, 2005 09:28 PM
Stargazer, do you have an aries moon, too? Forgive my if you've already given me this information in another thread.My boyfriend is a Virgo with an Aries moon and your description fits. I think there are a few other Virgo/Aries floating around here, too. ***** shop22much~ As long as you know where you stand, that's the important thing. If you know what you're doing and are aware of any possible implications then you should be well-prepared. I'm glad you're feeling better. IP: Logged |
aqua
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Oct 2009
|
posted September 26, 2005 06:00 AM
nice to hear that u r feeling a litter better ,honey!!!i'll work but take some time IP: Logged |
Lindaland
UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! 
