Posts: 2296
From: A temporary home
Registered: May 2004

posted June 10, 2006 07:41 AM         

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Hi guys

This morning I received the most terrible news from a friend I care alot for.
He is hoping to be dead by the end of the year-he is wanting to commit suicide!
This is not a joke people-he has done this ( tried to take his own life) in the past ( before I met him though)-and he is serious!

I have no idea what to do, to help him not kill himself, as we are literally thousands of miles apart ( we both live on different continents). I don't even know what to say to him, to convince him not to do this terrible thing. I don't want to lose him!

Please guys help me out with this!

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Posts: 8591
From: former land of the leprechaun
Registered: Sep 2004

posted June 10, 2006 08:25 AM         

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Oh Yang, so sorry to hear this....

Are you able to let me have just his first name...its full moon tomorrow and I am going to be doing prayers for people.

Would love to try and help, if I can....

Bless you and dont worry, he will be fine.....

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Posts: 2296
From: A temporary home
Registered: May 2004

posted June 10, 2006 09:00 AM         

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Hi Sue G

Thank you for your words and help.

His name is Llewellyn!

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Posts: 7178
From: 11/6/78 11:38am Boston, MA
Registered: Aug 2004

posted June 10, 2006 09:20 AM         

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Posts: 9809
From: Still out looking for Schrödinger's cat. fayte1954@hotmail.com
Registered: Mar 2005

posted June 10, 2006 10:08 AM         

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Yang...I will talk to you off-forum about this.

------------------
~I intend to continue learning forever~"Fayte"
~I am still learning~ Michangelo
The Door to Gnosis is never permanently locked...one only needs the correct keys and passwords.
The pious man with closed eyes can often hold more ego than a proud man with open eyes.
Out of the mouth of babes commeth wisdom that can rival that of sages.
In the rough, or cut and polished..a diamond is still a precious gem.
-NEXUS-

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Posts: 291
From: Up North
Registered: Apr 2005

posted June 10, 2006 03:32 PM         

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I'm sorry to here about your friend, Yang. Sending thoughts and prayers. Touch.

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Posts: 324
From: Monterey Bay California
Registered: Nov 2005

posted June 10, 2006 05:12 PM         

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Yang,that's a scary place to be, for sure.It's great that you care and are taking his threats seriously.Listening can help alot, so continue to lend an ear and be there for him in anyway you can.When someone is suicidal it is important to urge them to get help as soon as possible.
I don't know where your friend is, but he can call a crisis line such as:
1-800-SUICIDE in the US or look for local ones in his phonebook. Also there is an organization in the UK called The Samaritians( whose focus is helping those who are suicidal) you can email from anywhere :
jo@samaritans.org
they answer their e-mails everyday.You might also want to check their website:
http://www.samaritans.org.uk/
for more info( including telephone and texting numbers).
Also, calling a doctor or mental health professional is also a good option.
The important thing is to get him to seek help.
Good luck and let me know how it goes.

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Posts: 5927
From: The Little River Indian Reservation
Registered: Jan 2002

posted June 10, 2006 05:48 PM         

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Sending my love prayers for Llewellyn....

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Posts: 2296
From: A temporary home
Registered: May 2004

posted June 11, 2006 12:25 AM         

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Fayte- did you send an email? All I got was something about the Internet messing around, miscommunication?

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Posts: 9809
From: Still out looking for Schrödinger's cat. fayte1954@hotmail.com
Registered: Mar 2005

posted June 11, 2006 12:39 PM         

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You should have gotten several by now,
Including one or two before the glitchies.
And today also I replied.
Let me know.

------------------
~I intend to continue learning forever~"Fayte"
~I am still learning~ Michangelo
The Door to Gnosis is never permanently locked...one only needs the correct keys and passwords.
The pious man with closed eyes can often hold more ego than a proud man with open eyes.
Out of the mouth of babes commeth wisdom that can rival that of sages.
In the rough, or cut and polished..a diamond is still a precious gem.
-NEXUS-

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Posts: 5301
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted June 11, 2006 03:40 PM         

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I appreciate friends reaching out and asking for help, or being so beyond themselves, they HAVE to say something to someone they care about.. but this is NOT FAIR!!!
I'm sure he isn't thinking of others here, I am sure it isn't a malicious act necessarily, but it strikes me as a call for help that is defeating.
To put this huge thing on your shoulders like this, as if it is up to you to talk about it, and talk him out of it in a sense.
Ick. Too heavy.
Then, what, if he does it, you'll be thinking to yourself for the rest of YOUR life.. what if...? What if I'd only said the right thing?
What a terrible burden for someone to place upon you, though I wonder if he even sees it like this.
Lots of love and clarity to you.. Please don't let his actions affect you so very much. He has free will here, as do you. I'm glad he feels he can reach out to you.. so listen, express to him what you need to.. .but let him make his own decisions. It is up to him.
Be there... I can't think of anything else... what could you really do?
Love to both of you.

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Posts: 9809
From: Still out looking for Schrödinger's cat. fayte1954@hotmail.com
Registered: Mar 2005

posted June 11, 2006 04:07 PM         

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pixelpixie...
Thank you.
I agree.
Yang,
Pixie has said virtually much the same here as I said to you too.
This is not your burden to bear.
I know you are hurting and so is he. But it is ultimately his choice.
You have done your best, and acted very mature throughout all this.
I am very proud of you my caring friend.
God bless you and him too.
Love
Fayte

------------------
~I intend to continue learning forever~"Fayte"
~I am still learning~ Michangelo
The Door to Gnosis is never permanently locked...one only needs the correct keys and passwords.
The pious man with closed eyes can often hold more ego than a proud man with open eyes.
Out of the mouth of babes commeth wisdom that can rival that of sages.
In the rough, or cut and polished..a diamond is still a precious gem.
-NEXUS-

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Posts: 324
From: Monterey Bay California
Registered: Nov 2005

posted June 11, 2006 04:17 PM         

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Being told by a friend that he/she is suicidial IS a cry for help. I don't know about anyone else, but I would prefer to be there for them even if it is a "burden".
I know I am not responsible for what the person ultimately chooses to do. But I can do my best to be there for them.And many times for a suicidal person, that can make all the difference.

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Posts: 2296
From: A temporary home
Registered: May 2004

posted June 12, 2006 08:19 PM         

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Thank you guys for your kind words and love

On the one hand, I know there is SO much I can do, the rest is up to him, but on the other hand, I wish to be there by his side...

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Posts: 2805
From: dreamland
Registered: Jan 2004

posted June 13, 2006 01:28 AM         

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sorry to hear about this yang , but from my view i think it would be best to talk to him ,even if u don't know what to talk about the words will flow.

i'll be praying...

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Posts: 5301
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted June 13, 2006 09:32 AM         

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Regarding what Silvermoon said...
well of course, that goes without saying, and i tried to express that in my post. The fact that this friend cares enough about you to trust you with it, and share what he is going through indicates there is hope, of course. He wants to talk about it...
I am just saying, and it needs to be said.. help him, talk to him, be there.. but release it.
Yang is an extremely sensitive guy. I would hate to think if his friend decided, (no matter what anyone could say) to take his own life.... and because he had reached out to Yang for help, yet did it anyway, Yang would bear the guilt of 'letting him down'.
When it is his role to take on what he can.. he is not the master of anyone's life, so anything someone decides to do, whether they trust him with it or not, is their own free will.
I am not being cold when I say that there is nothing he can do that would guarantee his friend would be safe from himself. It is not Yang's responsibility.
But as a friend, if I had a friend who shared this with me, I would do my best to remind them what they mean to me and others, and try to be there to listen. It goes without saying.
Just.. protect yourself sweets, as well as your friend.

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Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005

posted June 13, 2006 11:26 AM         

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Sending you and your friend love, Yang.

I agree with PixelPixie in that you can't make your friend's decisions for him- it is his own free will and his responsibility. BUT I do think he is crying out for help. I feel for him, because I have been there. It is a dark place to be. He wants to give up, but then there is another part of him that isn't sure. He is very lost in his soul. This world isn't an easy place to be. We all need love & light to exist. If we loose touch with these things, we forget who we truely are and loose our strength.

He needs to find his strength again, and his path.

I Image Love and Light to you both, Yang

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Posts: 9809
From: Still out looking for Schrödinger's cat. fayte1954@hotmail.com
Registered: Mar 2005

posted June 13, 2006 02:11 PM         

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Yang
You are handling this very well. Keep doing as you have been. Alot of good advice here too. Take care of yourself my friend.
Love
Fayte

------------------
~I intend to continue learning forever~"Fayte"
~I am still learning~ Michangelo
The Door to Gnosis is never permanently locked...one only needs the correct keys and passwords.
The pious man with closed eyes can often hold more ego than a proud man with open eyes.
Out of the mouth of babes commeth wisdom that can rival that of sages.
In the rough, or cut and polished..a diamond is still a precious gem.
-NEXUS-

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Posts: 2296
From: A temporary home
Registered: May 2004

posted June 13, 2006 08:11 PM         

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to all you guys-thank you!

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Posts: 4812
From: South of the Thumb - Taurus, Pisces, Cancer
Registered: Sep 2004

posted June 14, 2006 02:19 AM         

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Love and prayers to you and your friend, Yang.

I hope that everything turns out okay. I agree with what Faye, silverstone and Pix said here. I also think it's a good sign that your friend is talking to you about it.

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Posts: 2276
From: London, UK
Registered: May 2005

posted June 14, 2006 06:14 AM         

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Oh yang I’m very sorry.

It’s definitely a cry for help, I doubt he will, but you definitely should not take a chance. Has he talked to his family? Is he close to them? He needs to see someone, and maybe go on some meds. But talk to him first see if he’s willing to seek help. This is a difficult time, and he’s lucky to have someone like you.

My prayers are with you

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Posts: 2296
From: A temporary home
Registered: May 2004

posted June 16, 2006 10:29 AM         

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I have tried my best to help him, but it seems that he is NOT interested! So, now I am distancing myself away to wait and see what happens. I need to move on and not hang by a thread of string.
BUT, I told him I am here if he WANTS TO talk!

Today, I am in a good mood

The sun is shining...the weather is sweet

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Posts: 9809
From: Still out looking for Schrödinger's cat. fayte1954@hotmail.com
Registered: Mar 2005

posted June 16, 2006 10:39 AM         

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Yang You are indeed a wonderful fellow!
You have done your best. And shown maturity and deep compassion in all this. Leave it to God now.
I am glad you are feeling better and appreciating the lovely things in your life.
Take care of "YOU" my dear friend.
God Bless you!
Love
Fayte

------------------
~I intend to continue learning forever~"Fayte"
~I am still learning~ Michangelo
The Door to Gnosis is never permanently locked...one only needs the correct keys and passwords.
The pious man with closed eyes can often hold more ego than a proud man with open eyes.
Out of the mouth of babes commeth wisdom that can rival that of sages.
In the rough, or cut and polished..a diamond is still a precious gem.
-NEXUS-

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Posts: 2296
From: A temporary home
Registered: May 2004

posted June 16, 2006 10:53 AM         

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Ahh, thank you Fayte , love you dearly

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Posts: 2805
From: dreamland
Registered: Jan 2004

posted June 16, 2006 11:01 AM         

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i hope every thing goes well !
Yang , u were great !

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