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I'm going to come back and look at this more fully later. I'm feeling a bit off today but I did notice a few interesting things - first of all, our natal Suns are one or two degrees apart. Yeah, maybe we have the same temperment. Can you post something about your ex? His natal chart with his transit? Maybe we were attracted to the same thing?
Yep, that's interesting about the Virgo/Pisces axes.
I guess that might add to either our need of perfection and security? Maybe we seek these aspects or in your case you probably express this.
I was more open with him because I knew he was a virgin and saving himself. I was attracted to the fact that he was very discerning about who he would enter into a relationship with. I felt I was safe from the headache of being with a man who makes poor choices and has no standards. But ironically his need for perfection did get a tad annoying; he has venus in virgo.
I had transiting Karma conjunct my natal Karma/Pluto and you had Transiting Pluto/Karma opposite your natal Karma. Hm.
This is very very interesting. I didn't take notice of it then. I did feel the relationship opened my eyes. However I feel it makes me more stubborn to go out and get exactly what I once intended to find. It strengthened my resolve. One thing though, around him I was soooo weak. Maybe I was meant to experience that sort of weakness. I've never felt that impressionable and vulnerable. I'm normal a very strong person. So I guess this has to do with my needing to learn life lessons, and for that, I am glad I did experience the whole thing no matter the result. I learned a lot.
He definitely was not the type of man I would fall for, but I "couldn't help it". I felt it was meant to be.
You had transiting Uranus squaring your natal Neptune. Venus (ruler of your 12th house) was squaring your IC (your root) as well as squaring your natal Venus which conjuncts your MC.
When I met him, I was trying ot distract myself from family issues. I did feel unloved and disillusioned.
A few days later on account that I needed to vent and didn't think that he would ever be a large part of my life....I "tried" to vent. I mean I tried as in I was being very vague and evasive. He's a psychologist and stated that his friends run to him for advice. I thought he would be a could random person to let my steam off in front of and also maybe learn a few insightful tools. He "tried" to help me.
But eventually he was my comfort and he filled the gap for me. He made me feel loved when I hadn't had that in a while. Actually I was craving to feel loved. I felt extremely unloved at the time.
Venus also rules your 7th house of partnerships so given that Venus rules both your 7th and 12th, it's sort of like having the energy that rules your partnerships (7th house) as well as your intuition (12th house) being challenged by that same energy/itself.
I was confused about family when I met him, so maybe it was that. Feeling unloved but then again still loved, because they are after all family. I didn't really see sparks flying with this guy, we barely knew each other. So I don't know if I would put so much importance on him about these aspects as I would put on my family with whom I was experiencing these said aspects.
I also have a 7th/12th connection. The natal ruler of my 7th house (partnerships) is Jupiter which resides in my 12th house (intuition). Transiting Neptune is squaring my natal Jupiter (partnerships) and also opposing my natal Mars which is the ruler of my 12th house (intuition). So the energy that makes up my 7th house (Jupiter and Neptune) is in conflict with the energy which rules my 12th house (Mars). Also, I had Uranus (widely) squaring my natal Neptune too.
What was going on in your life when you met?
Did he fill some sort of gap for you? Was the venus about him or about other people?
Or did you feel a spark with him, something deeper than you felt with any other man? Maybe he shook your life around for a reason.
I think that the 7th and 12th houses, because they are inconjunct naturally, often make for a confusing way of relating to partners. It can get foggy and unclear, although never has my intuition been so wrong.
That day though I wasn't at all focused on men. It was all about family and career. It was a tough time like I said. I had no energy nor interest to pursue a r/s. This guy wasn't all too special when I met him. He simply grew on me.
Just from this cursory look, I suspect that the fact that our 7th and 12th house connections being squared/challenged by Neptune probably had something to do with being very wrong about what our guts were telling us.
Now that I think about it though. I've never felt a connection like that with anyone in my life. Yet, it was my first time falling in love. Maybe this was the reason I was open to his influence or energy. You know you really set me thinking about this.
Well you may be right. I'd love to see your guy's chart for the day you met. I think however that days natal transit is too weak to tell the story of the entire r/s?
There has to be more. Maybe like you said the birth of our r/s. The first time he started taking interest in you or better yet the first time the both of you felt a deep connection. I had that there were a couple times I thought...he was reading my mind. We had so many spooky coincidences. I felt he was a male version of me. But that was much later when I started to get to know him.
I think we sould also consider the composite, the energy we produce together.
I still think though you are on to something with the 7th and 12th house connection. Maybe it caused us to be more open and receptive to these men? Maybe it caused us to sense a underdeveloped area within us so that we ... went searching for what we needed most?
Edited to add: Yeah Chiron and Neptune together make for an interesting combo, however they were transiting your 4th and they were transiting my 10th. Still, opposing houses. I'm actually not sure what effect Chiron/Neptune would have together. Burt we did both have Chiron squaring our natal Moons and my Moon is in my 12th conjunct my SN so that probably didn't help matters.
I can be emotionally volatile. My chiron is in a sucky position....lol 7th house. Oh well. It does cause me the most pain.
Do you have issues with your mom or don't feel that motherly instinct showered upon you? Maybe there is just some sort of distance be it emotional or distance.
I have has issues with my mom... maybe this is the reason why.