posted September 28, 2005 06:19 PM              

I do know that it's not a weak theory,
early childhood experiences teach us what to trust and what to fear and not to fear. Your anatomy does not guide you, the emotional experiences that shape you do because we change ourselves through what we learn is normal.

The only time we are exposed to purely normal society in our minds is in childhood and it's very hard to change those messages. Once change is accepted, the road gets easier.

So many problems come from people who do not want to risk judgement by talking about their childhoods, and then the fears become more rigid and deeply buried. Change becomes impossible in any way, shape or form until a crisis.

I know many people from my childhood who were affected by the same things, and refuse to admit it. They use every other idea, to avoid the reality of my parents and aunts and uncles. I never pull any punches and talk about it like it was, and I know that's why I don't hate my sexuality or dislike being who I am. Woman or man, g/f or wife, mother or child, I like who I am today.

Very few people deal with this.
I really was looking for fun and new people, and it was kind of scary-and fell into sexuality. I really wanted to play dress up both ways, with cowboy hats and dresses, play make believe and play all the parts. If a girl had a pretty dress I wanted the dress too so I was easily swayed by glamour. Then again I was around 8.

(My message is good self esteem=happy sexuality. Who we sleep with is pretty random depending on who we meet, but we can control how we feel about ourselves.)

It's tough for me if I am not having sex in a good relationship I tend to feel awful about myself. I battle that all the time, but I am getting much better at focusing on my soul and the souls of others because nobody wants to believe this anymore. I feel this world does not look at emotional experience as significant, only sexual ones.

Took me a while to discover, I am happy with a less overly masculine partner. I dont' like belching, dishonesty, back slapping, all that stuff, bragging, pride.
I have learned I do better with a friend who is not overly bossy, male or female. I know Mars conjunct ascendant women are a bit bossy and I have accepted that in myself.

Natasha

posted September 28, 2005 09:16 PM            

Sorry Natasha, but you are only partially right. Your intuitions are on track, but you cannot disregard biology in the choices we make. Are you a woman by choice? Do you have a monthly cycle because of things you learned as a kid? Your emotions are different simply BECAUSE you were born a woman, but they are ALSO different because society treats you as a woman. You cannot discount the biological anymore than you can discount the environmental, ask any psychologist. In fact, if you do any reading, you will find that the human mind is biologically wired to absorb/respond to the environment. However, I see nothing other than intuition/anecdotal evidence to back up your claims that sexuality is chosen at a young age. If you do any reading on the subject you'll see that the answers are still inconlusive.

posted October 01, 2005 09:33 PM              

Some truths are self evident, that is you don't need to read about them, they are everywhere, only experience in the world can teach us this. Once you have learned, how to adapt in the world, the way many people have, you will learn that we do control our anatomy, it does not always control us.

Eventually the truth and intuition become one, if you are exposed to enough people/realities.

I am not being arrogant when I say I have truly adapted beyond what most people can or want to, but it's very difficult. 98% of the friends you know will play out a script-but we can change-through experience and acceptance. It helps that I have an 8th house moon, and the 8th house is about other people. I am open to other people always.

One thing I have learned though, is that most people, have trouble accepting differences when it comes to seuxality. It's the one place where things get weird, because they have to risk everything they are and change.

In reality, we can change a million times in one lifetime, what other people see is just a picture of our real selves. You could sleep with 200 people, men and women and it wouldn't make any difference if you decide to join a monastery tomorrow.

Both are true, and normal since it's normal to try new things and change. Anatomy isn't destiny anymore, we know so much more about ourselves than we did in Freud's time.

Natasha
Chiron Aries/4th house