posted November 02, 2005 09:59 AM              

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Aen who is fayte.m and why do people think he/she is me?

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Fayte is mostly around in the Universal Codes. I think Loggerhead just saw some silmilarity in your names, that all. And I understand from her later post she unederstood that you are not the same person.

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Cold hard fact of life: You teach people how to treat you.

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Well said. Much better (IMO) than this black and white Nice vs. Smart oppostion which simply doesn't give any space between options. Confidence and knowing what you expect from other people (and what you DON'T accept) are always a must. Which means that anyone who wants a b*tch is out of my life in a nanosecond.

posted November 02, 2005 04:38 PM            

Nope.. I am not into bootie calls. When we are done.. we are done.. and I am not into people just coming over.. LOL..

I think people need to be honest with themselves and with the other person. Sure you take the chance of getting hurt, but it should teach you a lesson when you are met with another set of similar circumstances.

Even though I got hurt with the loser Taurus.. I won't let that prevent me from being my normal social outgoing and honest self. I am telling the men that are interested in me that I am only interested in dating at this time and we'll see where it goes.

LOL.. then again, I am being pursued by yet another Taurus (this one with a Saggie moon and Cancer rising) and a Cancer (Saggie moon and also a cancer rising). LMAO....

I really like the Cancer guy and his mom is a Saggie so he is used to my energy LOL.... She is 70 years old and went back to school to get her masters and is now taking the LSATs for law school LMAO.. how Archer is that.

Natasha,

I am so sorry you have had to deal with all that. Your man has alot of fixed energy in his chart.. his way or no way. I also have a fire moon in the 7th house.. but that doesn't presdipose one to want to control people.

It does make us a bit protective and a little jealous- but he has enough fixed planets to make him already want to be controlling. He may not know how to handle the real energies of a woman such as yourself and that scares him.

You have so much to offer someone... that you don't need his emotional immaturity to cause you pain. People like him (and I said people because I see it in MEN and WOMEN) are better left at the curb!!

posted November 03, 2005 12:54 PM              

Regarding 1st house sun men, macho men, and men with lots of aries, or fire influences.

What bothers me the most is the higher than thou attitude of those who capture a moment and refuse to face themselves. For example, when I said to the Aqua you need to face yourself because you were too insincere to admit you wanted sex on a number of occasions and refused to tell me the truth about what was happening that day. he said that never happened, I never said that. Then he would say you took phone calls from other men and I freaked out.

My memory is that I took a call from another man with the door open rather than acting evasive with it shut, and related the entire call. Then spent 8 hours consoling him, that I was not in love with anyone else-or leading anyone else on-when his freaking out was an insincere act. If I had the door shut he would have freaked out even more.

He can't face the fact that he was overacting-selling himself is fine but to a point-then we have to back off and respect another's right to choose based on the truth. When I would ask him a question I would get, I don't want to get into it. I then said, get to the point-you do want to get into it because you are ****** off about another man. You are jealous and can't face it. Get over it and get to the point because it's my life.

To be honest, I could drain myself with much work on this man for months and get everything I want-attention. Then I would be right back where I was with my ex. Why not go back to him?

The best way to deal with men with so much fire/air in their chart is to be the woman, be sweet and then kick their ***** out of my house by being brutal after two months. Then they will or will not come back, changed. At the very least I will get a friend who can listen, but if I stik around I become a servant.

In the Cancer/Leo Moon/Venus Gemini case, I did just that and he came back a month later calling me his Queen. Now when I do want to talk, he's never around but I can at least answer the phone when he calls for a night out and know there will be no pushing. That's as far as it goes for that friendship-and that's why we make new friends.

I am not dating actor/photographer types again when everything they do is acting and selling themselves and they believe I am doing the same. The jealousy for the attention is crazy-and I don't indulge.

The one time another man came up to me and it looked funny, was because I was crying and he felt sorry for me. My Aqua didn't notice, and the other man did. I wasn't acting, but I had forgotten anyone could see me after a while.

I ended up talking to my ex Libra this Halloween and he calls me periodically to threaten suicide and blame me for feeling fat and unloved. I had it out with him, and I want to harass him into getting his life together through me so the calls stop.
This week he was in the house all week without going out because he had a blackhead. I can't stand it, I will force him to get out and meet someone else even if I have to be the transitional object.

That will help me,

Thanks Knowflakes,

posted November 03, 2005 01:14 PM            

Ahh... First house Suns.. somehow I can't seem to avoid them. The kicker to me though is if they have a Virgo moon or if they have any negative Moon / Neptune aspects especially if Mercury is involved. The Taurus was a first house Sun..with a Virgo moon - Moon square Neptune which also opposed his natal Mercury (major T-square). He couldn't tell the truth to save his life, he never took responsibility for his actions AND he was wildly insecure.

He did EXACTLY what your Aqua did regarding the inability to recall certain conversations or saying I said something that I never did. My favorite what he would tell me he told me something when he didn't. I started to keep his phone messages and play them back for him to prove he was WRONG.

I can deal with First house suns..obviously since I am a fire sign.. but when it is combined with other aspects, it can really throw a wrench into the fan. The Taurus, as you know, also has Venus conjuncting Saturn in Cancer.. HARSH aspect... lots of issues..

posted November 03, 2005 01:25 PM              

Natasha, I shouldn't laugh, but that line about your ex and the blackhead was just TOO funny - if a bit tragic. Men! What are they like???!!

posted November 03, 2005 01:33 PM            

He has a Saggie mom (her b-day is 6 days before mine) and I have a Cancer mom (my mom's b-day is 4 days after his).

We laughed about how we've both been trained in the art of the Cancer and Saggie mom. It is a bit peculiar though... Cancer's already have this mom thing.. and his mom is a Saggie..LOL.. MY Sun conjuncts his moon within 2 degrees. BUT.. I am taking it SUPER slow... SUPER SUPER SUPER slow...

Luckily, it doesn't seem like a Cancer is all that ready to just sweep someone off their feet, so I should be okay LOL... he is also older than me.. about 3 1/2 years and I do like that. Oh yeah.. and he is hot.. like the Newport Lifeguard that he used to be.. 6 foot 1, totally built and still swims like a fish...hee hee

Okay enough about that.. How are you doing AT? Do you like your new digs? How is life treating you?

Talk to you soon,

posted November 03, 2005 02:15 PM              

Don't be lulled into security with Cancer men especially with Venus in Gemini. I know one who treats me like a Princess but then he can wink and say the most sexually suggestive things and it's easy to fall under his spell. Once he goes forward he never goes back.

Enjoy a slow relaxed courtship, there ought to be a long getting to know you time. Nobody falls in love in two or three weeks, and long term friends need a lot more reassurance. It's tempting to be sexy but then he could be needy, or sex starved underneath.

Are you renovating houses?

AT, yes men are as bad as women in the personal vanity department. The Libra and I were like Nathan Lane and Robin Williams in the Birdcage, and I know I am the man. He actually tried getting the blackhead out and possibly scarred himself. Now he feels worse than ever so I told him he looks fine.

At least he is sincere about his problems these days. His Pluto conjunct Venus in Virgo can be angry and unhappy unless he trusts, opens up and laughs at himself. I bought him a giggle stick and that cheered him up. (a giggle stick is a stick that makes a giggle noise when you shake it)

posted November 03, 2005 05:10 PM              

Blimey - the things you have to do for some people...

Pidaua, yes, I have settled in fine (set the cogs in motion to divorce Mr. Aqua today), would LOOOVE to be earning some money though, still looking for a job/ trying to get a foot in the creative door, as I refuse to live on state benefits. Although I have got a couple of gardening jobs POSSIBLY lined up, so, we'll see. How are things for you on the career front?

AT

posted November 03, 2005 06:57 PM            

I am definitely going sloooooow. I already told him that I need lots of time and he doesn't seem to be pushing. He does gush over me and hasn't been suggestive sexually in the least. He has a pretty nice chart as well (but we have lots of clashes). I have another Taurus pursuing me.. with a Sag moon as well LOL... but HE is a bit pushy and makes more than a few sexual comments. He has Mercury in Aries and The Cancer has Mercury in Leo.

In any case.. I won't fall at all for a long time.. I am just enjoying the friendship - besides he is here for classes and will be going back to Texas next month. I am NOT going to relocate for a man again.. no way... even though this last time it was to get back out west LOL....

And yes.. the Moon- Neptune thing is big.. really big.. and I now look at that in ANYONE's chart I start to get involved with or have an interest in.. even more than if our sun sign or moons like each other LOL...

AT,

The career front is a bit like yours LOL... still trying to find something. I have several contacts with NETCOM and they are passing my resume on Post as well with their federal contacts with Homeland Security. The county supervisor I worked for is under investigation for wrongful termination and there are alot of shakeups going on there.. even the board of supervisors are involved.. so we'll see what happens. Personally, I don't want to go back.. I'd rather find a new opportunity. It has even been suggested I could be trained in network security (a totally different career) which sounds exciting ..

but for now.. I am, for the FIRST time, enjoying single life without working..does that makes sense? All my life I had been tied to something or someone.. last time I was without work I was with Mr. A$$face (as I like to call him) and he made it impossible to enjoy being around him when I was out of work. He hated when I wanted to go see my family and would ridicule me because I was looking for a job comparable with what I earned my degrees in. He thought I should have given up and just taken a job at the local fast food place.

If he was paying my bills then I would have. But I assumed half the debt with what I had saved and NEVER put him out financially at all LOL... ahhh..but that is all different now and I am having the time of my life.

I am getting back into shape the way I am used to being.. more lean and muscular (he was not into outdoor activities in the least and I have to walk up 60 concrete stairs everyday to get to my house) LOL... This is a total walking town so I have been keeping myself busy and getting back into Yoga.

I am happy to hear that things are getting into motion.. I Know it is hard.. it is damn hard. Leaving the Taurus I felt like I was getting a divorce.. hell divorcing my ex-husband was easier that the Taurus. At least he and I stayed friends. I can't even look at the Taurus without feeling ill. Oh well... live and learn