posted January 10, 2006 01:17 PM              

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when a cancer reads all these messages,what is in his mind? does it not ring a bell in his heart ..that this lady likes me sooo much at least i should give her a reply?why doesnt he reply?

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yeah , the bell rings but i would be messaging my bruised ego .
imagine , a woman who refused is back on her knees pleading .the best balm for a men's ego,whether you believe this or not !

a cancer would be filling sentimental too (he wont show just to make sure that he isn't being used )but it all depends on the amount of his hurt that will decide whether he will return your gestures or not . for me, i might not !

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can the reason of not answering all these messages be that he is simply not intrested?

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if a cancerian man is really not interested what would he do? how is his behaviour compared to his normal behaviour of disappearing

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even then , he would treat her with respect .never ridicule her ( he might boast of it among his friends but then thats a normal men behaviour -boasting about women )that actually creates confusion bcos they dont know how to say 'NO' . ( they can do it only when they are talking money or eating )

been in that situation ,quite a few times .
there is a girl in my neighbourhood ,same condition as your hypothetical situation , but the problem is , i can't act pricey just bcos someone gives me prominence . so, everytime we meet, our eyes meet and i always have that simple look ,may be this 'look' gives her an impression that i am interested and will you believe this , this has been going on for almost two and a half yrs. now . and i wont lie , intially i did think of using her as a time pass gf but i didn't go ahead simply bcos , i knew once i have commited (or the girl has cried in front of me ) i wont be able to say 'no' .
she is a nioce girl but isn't my type .

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where do all these cancer man go when they hide or dissappear?..are they fancying other women, really where do they go?

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NOWHERE !
to understand this you have to know some basics , cancers are the day dreamers ( you know , i am never alone) eternal optimists (they are second only to sags in this dept. , infact this is one of the reason for thier friendship though they are very very different people )

ofcourse , i might be thinking of other women not in literal sense but deep within iknow i have a feeling that i might get back and everything would be normal .
i know this is weird ( and i am accepting this for the first time ) i still have the feeling s for all the women that i have loved .
unpractical ,huh....
but then who said they were practical people ? i dont consider myself one !

posted January 12, 2006 01:42 PM              

coming back to your questions,

the three month gap and then coming back thing :
have you ever seen a crab move ?
two steps forward than a move back then again three to his left .........

well thats the same with us , if we feel hurt , we'll move back to our shell , recuperate and then come back smiling again . ( that also explains our revenge strategy , we come back to strike )
the length of time depends on the amount of hurt .
having said this , this behaviour seems more pronounced in relations like yours ,mainly bcos how much do you really know your crab, may be this behaviour seems weird to you but once your are a part of thier lives , have faith ,know this behaviour pattern , you get more assured , once you know for sure that they'll come back for sure .
the closer people are given lot more chances and less of this tantrum ( if u call it that )

i myself have never found it irratic though with the cancer women that i have known , infact thier always was the instant wavelength ,i didn't really know about the astrology then but always felt this.

ah, and i must add , cancers ,bcos of thier shells are one of the most misunderstood people around , thats my feeling !

further more , its not lack of interest . actually , it doesn't take much for a cancer to fall in love or even simply get impressed . you just have to talk respectfully with them and they are all yours.
as for keeping options open , thats a general men behaviour .

running after a girl:
you know what , i have taurus moon , leo in venus that makes me very outgoing especialy in case women ,also add the cancer's diplomacy and respectfulways !
infact ,today my super boss in between a serious meeting suddenly said that he( me) was one guy that every women in office liked (but ofcourse , not in a romantic sense, a no. of them are married )

and the first women that i ever fell in love with is one of the most beautiful women that i have ever seen ( she is from the punjabi community ,considerd to be the most beautiful in india . half of the indian film industry actress are punjabis!)
but then even , i never asked her for marriage or ran after her . never even said those three wonderful words , we just knew !

it was the same in the second one .
and same for the current crush .

so, in my view , in a very generalised way,cancers dont really run after girls in a literal sense . but give them a cosy envoirn, and see them flirt .
infact , i feel , they are outageous flirts even surpassing gems in certain sense .

and now , my question , what similarities and dissimilarities , did you find in cancers and gems ?

posted January 12, 2006 08:37 PM              

things that i have personaly found similar between myself and cancerians are soo many that it is not possible to list them all ..but here are a good few:

take a guess on what i do every new years night....
very simple, i stay at home! (pretty boring huh?)but it gives me great comfort to be around my family, my friends find me weird but for me my home where i can always come back and my mother who cares for me give me the greatest strenght.
what do i do all this time at home?
i need to think, unwind myself, recharge myself,plan for tommorow, think abt yesterday and just keep dreaming on and on...
i have never let anyone know this before,..but i am a professional day dreamer, i live a completely diffrent life in my dreams..my dreams are very intense and real to me. in my dreams i talk to people that i wish i could be with in real life, i do things i always wanted to but never got a chance to do in real life..in simple words i am very very happy in my dream world. (pretty scarry,huh?)

the only secrets that i can keep are my own!
no matter how close a person is to me ..be it my mom or a lover, he can never know the real me , i can never share my inner most feelings, my inner thoughts are buried inside me..they belong in my own world ..cannot be shared with anyone!

my ideal man - it may sound funny but when ever anyone questions me abt what qualities my ideal man shoulds have ...i always say he should be like my mother.its funny to many people but to me this is really what i want, i get attracted to a man who starts fussing over me like my mom.a man who will love me unconditionaly like my mom..(i would appreciate if he could also cook n clean as well..hehe!)
love to me is a very strong emotional need,it is kind of an emotionaly security for me ,.. it is a feeling that i found similar in scorpions.

taking revenge is impossible..i can plan a revenge for years but my heart does not allow it to take action.
the only thing i do is i remove all these bad people out of my life and shut the door on them!..and yes i cut off all contacts with the people who have hurted me and make it a point not to trust them in future - (*here there is a diffrence in me and cancer)
*if a person wants to make up for his mistakes i will give them a chance but i never forget what they did n i keep telling them what they had done to me untill i feel they have done something big enough to make up for it.
however i can never ever forgive a person who has betrayed my trust , never!

my greatest fear(afcourse after financial security) is being rejected!
guess what...do u really want to know y i rejected mr.c, it may sound silly .. but after i over heard his conversation with his friend abt me being 'nothing'..i was afraid that he might reject me first..yes he proposed to me that night but he might have rejected me the next morning!!..(i know i sound like such a loser!)
i did not think i was good enough for him thats why i rejected him...i made him feel that i didnt like him!..but it really was me..i was not confident abt myself ..even now i am not!
i find him better looking than me..financialy very well off than me and so on..
i have so many insecurities inside me that i just cry helplessly thinking abt it...
i want to be loved but i am tooo afraid of being rejected at any stage of the relationship!

whats the diffrent in me and cancers:
geminis are more forgiving - cancers pls learn to be more forgiving..i mean if i saw a guy running after me like crazy, crying to get me back ...i would really appreciate his love for me and forgive him.

cancerians hiding in the shell business - no way can i do this ...i need questions and answers..i just cannot back out from a serious situation without letting others know what i feel. confrontation is important.

the cancer disappearing act - i need to be around the special people in my life ..so that i can take care of them,i am too afraid to leave them alone who knows when they might need my help!.. think abt it!

thats all i can say....(what more could u ask 4 ? rite!!)

posted January 12, 2006 08:52 PM              

It's a feeling I have when someone is too open with their feelings because I become undone when expected to open up that much. I can't imagine how hard that must be day after day, exposing your innermost feelings, I would have a nervous breakdown.

So it's hard for me, being the unforgiving type sometimes, with a Gemini.

My advice is, being a Gemini you are very chatty and open and that's wonderful, but it's good to focus on how you want to present yourself.

Make eye contact, many Geminis do not do this and instead look around at everything and fidget a bit. Even though it's because you are nervous it may seem that you are angry, or unhappy in some way.

I don't know if I am a good judge of Cancers but I lived with a Gemini for while last year and he was constantly looking angry, or unhappy and I didn't know that's just the way he was. Being a Taurus/Cancer with a progressed sun in Cancer with a strong 4th house I am friends with Geminis but I never knew one well enough to understand one. Being close without being too close will help your Cancer and future Cancers to understand your nature better and build those emotional bonds.

Do not be unhappy, be comforted in that your energy is not wasted, instead you are aware of what you want and how badly you want it, and that passion and energy are wonderful.

I recommend stepping back and saving your energy for focusing on yourself, and keeping your phone number out there. Prepare for when you will meet him again (easier said than done I know), and have a quick story to tell about your own life, with the expectation you will hear about his life, express your sincere wish that he is happy, and then be on your way.

posted January 14, 2006 01:30 PM              

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the only secrets that i can keep are my own!

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Idont think thats a cancer thing !
cancers do keep secrets , no doubt that but they dont hide thier sentiments even though they are quite shy.

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geminis are more forgiving - cancers pls learn to be more forgiving..

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hahahahahahahahaha...........
thats why we love you !
geminis and libras ( to an extent , i wont club aquas in it though ) do come come as fresh air to us !
may be thats the reason ,we normally get alomg with both .
we , ofcourse like this aspect of yours .

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confrontation is important.

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i get your point here . can you elobrate a bit , i just wanna know a bit more .
though i undrerstand you absolutely, i just want know what more do u have to say on this .

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the cancer disappearing act - i need to be around the special people in my life ..so that i can take care of them,i am too afraid to leave them alone who knows when they might need my help!.. think abt it!

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posted January 14, 2006 05:30 PM              

I wonder if maybe it helps them play the martyr and not face any guilt for the part they played in the situation.

Cancers don't seem to be very good at apologising in these situations.