posted July 12, 2006 07:29 PM              

I can't get it through women's heads that so many men cheat, they believe it's got to be a woman's desirability that draws the man in and so they feel flattered!

It's society, it's keeping up with the joneses, it's going on everyday and it's not even about desire or sex.

It's about winning.

People lie soooooo well
Like the time one man told me that his wife starting dating and bringing men home so he had to listen to them together, that drove him to find a true love, so he is married and dating..but what else can he do to find his soul mate???

Who could resist a line like that? Or not believe him when they see his second empty vacation home...empty liquor bottles, sad photos...so easy!

Guys even swap second homes, tell stories, it's a national obsession.

Wives get caught up in the conquest.

I'm not sure if its' because our society worships money and power or not, but certain signs do keep up with Joneses and whatever they are doing is what everyone is doing.

It seems like guys from the USA like to blame everything on the woman, and guys in Europe prefer to take the responsibility.

Anyway it's a power trip being married or having someone..

Natasha
Taurus/Cancer Moon

posted September 23, 2006 11:17 PM              

Like you, I've seen many married men hit on other women, including me, and it really makes me disillusioned. It's like they have no guilt about it whatsoever, either! Every guy I've been friends with cheated on their girlfriends or wives - I was told about it, because I was their friend, but later, I realized it was all of my male friends that cheated. Now, maybe it is just the men I used to be friends with, this is possible, but unfotunately I don't think that is the case. I've been hit on by married men at: work, in the store, basically everywhere. By all kinds of men. Clean cut, scruffy, professional, blue collar - you get the point. I am not one to wear revealing outfits (not that that should make a married or attached man hit on me anyway. They aren't supposed to be in the market), but you know what I'm saying here. Also, I don't even date, and haven't for years, and I am pretty clear on that.

Did you know that over 30% of married men put up profiles on dating sites, like match.com, etc? In fact, I knew a married man who put up a site saying he was separated (he wasn't). He told me about it. He was a coworker, as well as a friend.

Finally, I find many men define cheating differently than I do. You know, the "Clinton Syndrome." Or, they think going to a prostitute isn't cheating. It is disgusting - imagine putting your wife or girlfriend in danger of the STD's you'd get from a hooker. I shudder to think of it.

I'm hoping all men aren't this way (my eternal optimism versus logic), but I fear they might be, since they are so undiscreet about it. I don't know how their wives or GF's don't find out. I know I'll find out if it happens to me...forewarned is forearmed.

posted September 24, 2006 12:21 AM              

It disgusts me that there are services dedicated to promoting promiscuity...Here in Canada it's not uncommon to find infomercials on tv or the radio from this company called ashley madison that advertises itself as a service/middleman "for women seeking affairs - and the men that want to fulfil them".

posted September 24, 2006 09:06 AM              

Oh virtuous of Sheriff's...

You've heard of V for Vendetta? I'm Double-V for Virtuous Vagina ...

... UH! .... (I know) too hot for primetime ...

posted September 24, 2006 09:12 AM            

And I second everything DayDreamer just said Those type of people, both male and female,disgust me.

posted September 24, 2006 10:33 AM              

Logic goes into the making of a latex condom, but logic seldom accompanies a sex moment.

(the real kind, NOT the Clinton kind).

posted September 24, 2006 05:05 PM              

I hate the word “cheating~” as it’s too broad. Is cheating:

1. When someone leaves you for someone else? With or without telling you..
2. When you’re with someone, and you learn they have a mate…before you?
3. When someone stops being around you, the sex stops…and you find out they’re with someone else?
4. If pretty much everything stays the same, and you find they’re with someone else and you?

But on the subject of morals, I believe intent is important. You may do the right thing, for the wrong reason…as an act or whatever..

I’ve always questioned morality, as it’s a difficult subject.

For example person A robs a shop…knows it’s wrong, but does it anyway.
Then there’s person B, who thinks it’s perfectly acceptable.

Who has more morals? You could say person A at least admits that it's wrong…but then, because of this "knowledge"…they shouldn’t be doing it in the first place.

posted September 25, 2006 04:45 PM              

Venus aspects can be self-indulgent, don't find Libras that loyal after all and can't think of a sun sign that guarantees fidelity (think we ended up talking about this in this thread?). Scorpio, Taurus and Cap can lie to protect what they have...Leos won't cheat if they still adore you...

I personally don't like the idea of being with an attached guy, why would I put myself so low for a guy who's not worth it? I'm precious, and I don't respect people who can't make up their minds in such matters.

Still, I might consider extending romance with one for a few days if I find out he's attached? Why? Because I have needs that can be covered a bit longer, and because he's the jerk, not me. Obviously, if I knew the girl once I find out, I wouldn't go further, but the guy is still the jerk, not me. Women tend to get these ideas so wrong...if the guy cheats, he's the one who can't control himself, the girl was just having some fun...

This last idea excludes girls who purposely seek to mess up relationships...

Generally, I don't believe humans are monogamous, cos we are not, ok? There's not enough time here to explain scientifically and historically why not. But once you decide to be monogamous (or to try to) it is a compromise and a display of loyalty and respect towards your partner.

I'm monogamous by the way, but as a good piscean, I fantasize in my head, hehe.

posted September 25, 2006 04:53 PM              

Anyhow, I've never extended anything with a cheating guy (like it usually happens, I found out later that this guy was attached) but I have thought of these things lately, from a physical and detached view...

I correct my thinking: I doubt I'd do it myself (lack of respect for the guy, too heavy stuff-guilt in a way towards the unknown person?-) but can understand that some people do it for some days...

Doing it for a longer period...that has heavy moral implications and it's just self-harming for all parties...

posted September 25, 2006 07:57 PM              

It was all such a dissapointment when he finally told us what he had done. His wife was so good to him, it just about tore her to pieces (his family as well). She was just as apart of the family as he was. Now it's awkward. Things aren't the same anymore. She said she despises him for making her how she is now, a b*tch - she's the nicest person in the world.

posted September 26, 2006 11:06 AM            

If a person is single, they have the right to hit on anyone they want to. Ok, perhaps hitting on a person you know to be married is not the most respectful thing to do, but the responsibility is always on the person who is married. It is always the person who is married who cheats, not the person who isn't commited to anyone.

posted September 26, 2006 08:45 PM            

That cracks me up and you are so right. I think cheating is awful and especially so if the single woman or single man seeks to break up a relationship. I have seen this in the past with a few friends. One co-worker told me she did it because the man would give her twice as many gifts out of guilt or worry that she would tell his wife.

BUT... people need to really look at the person that is in the relationship that is seeking to cheat as well. Some men and women thrive on the thrill of the chase without thinking about their families. Some are sex addicts and some are just self-centered weenies.

Cheating is such a convoluted and dirty thing, how anyone wants that guilt or to cause that pain is beyond me. As far as doing it because one is in a sad relationship -GET OUT.. move on, leave the person. I blurred that line once. I was separated but still living in the house of my ex-husband when I met someone through work. I only saw him while I was on the road and didn't mention it nor did I call him when I was at my ex's house. I wasn't able to quite move out yet because of my schedule but the relationship was clearly over to both of us as we had already had "the talk". I moved out shortly after I started with the dating.

Yet... it still makes me feel guilty because I resided in the same house. It made me feel... sort of sneaky and that isn't how I like to go through life.

It is so hard to judge others because we may not always know the situation. BUT, knowingly entering into a relationship with a married person OR being the cheating married person seems horribly wrong.

Scarlet,

Beautiful posts

posted September 27, 2006 12:49 AM              

quote:

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When it comes to moral signs, it's a difficult thing to say as all signs can cheat. Someone mentioned strong Saturn to be good, and well-aspected moon. Well guess what, I have unaspected Saturn and badly aspected moon (in Aries) and I couldn't imagine cheating on someone.

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