posted December 09, 2007 11:46 AM            

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A partnership between two people exists on the grounds of mutual healing and experience, or support (may it be emotional, sexual, financial, etc.) However, if those needs are somehow fullfilled, a person may feel like turning to someone else to gain the other necessary experiences from and that is where its unfair for the other partner to keep on clinging to someone when they know that they have to let them go inorder for them to continue evolving (remember; I premise this on all the fact that both partners are familiar with the concepts of respect and responsibility Lol!)

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It’s unthinkable – mindboggling – to imagine myself married today to the fella I was engaged to at 19. I’ve grown so far past the people we were then and he probably has too. People live longer than they did several centuries ago when the fairytale was “happily ever after – forever.” I have not yet met a man that I could truly and honestly make the vow “Till death do us part” with. What I take issue with in your comment is about needs being fulfilled and moving on. imo, a partnership formed with “need” as the core commitment is doomed to failure and disappointment. My aim is trying not to let anyone else supply those things for me that I should strive for and gain for myself, or let anyone else live out a part/side of me that I’ve repressed or that lies inside me dormant in embryonic form. I think of partnership as two whole people, self-sufficient and comfortable in their own skins, who come together for mutual giving and receiving, benefiting each other by the sharing of their accumulated life experiences.

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So really I do not see come-and-go unions as unfaithfulness or permiscuoisity. I see it as a continious evolution journey that allows people to gain something within themselves from others that they just would have missed out on in a strictly monogomous relationship.

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BoE ~

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I really meant that I find myself surrounded by people who can't be alone with themselves for a week or else they're complaining about how unhappy they are. It seems to me these days that people are so needy that they'll just go out desperately searching for someone because they don't want to be alone. It takes anything that is special in a relationship out of it when people just start settling for a lover because there isn't anything better around at the moment.

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Ericka ~

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In the end we only have ourselves. I know this Gemini with Libra rising. He is not in love but is with his SO for the companionship. I guess that is enough for some people.

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SagSun ~

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True, we have to love ourselves first in order to attract someone else into our life. BUT sometimes people do love themselves but still they aren't happy ... You know, come to think of it, maybe "happy" is not the right choice of word here. I am happy with myself. But I feel kind of incomplete when I don't have someone in my life that I can give my love to.

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posted December 09, 2007 12:36 PM              

Couple months ago my best friend and I went to Bush Gardens and had the time of our lives, just like kids we run from one ride to the next, I was really happy, I forgot about the kids , work and everything else; I love him for that day, it was great; but there was a couple times while in line or walking I would look at him and wonder how much better would that day be if the guy I am in love with was there instead of him.

In other words you can trick yourself into happiness and that is a way out, just like having people getting attached to material stuff or things to do so they will forget and be taken somewhere else(like Zala said) but at night when you lay down in bed and you hug a pillow instead of a warm body where you can feel you belong somewhere and there was a reason why you got up or you spent a couple hours making a great dinner etc that feeling you can not get on your own.
The only time I can get that feeling of being taken somewhere else and being complete in peace is when I play my guitar.

Now when we are younger we get caught up in the games of life and we are "stronger"... we really are undestructible and we need to conquer the world so your perception of being a part of another human being and sharing a partnership are different, you have to learn first who you are before you can truely love another person.This is where I am still confused as of how if there is a God up there we have to go through having and loosing to know when to partber with someone and bring kids in the equation that we can not really help because we havent't helped ourselves yet.

posted December 09, 2007 12:44 PM              

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People live longer than they did several centuries ago when the fairytale was “happily ever after – forever.” I have not yet met a man that I could truly and honestly make the vow “Till death do us part” with

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I think this is why I don't beleive in the marriage paper, I think when it is right you will just want to be with the person and that can make it "forever" but without something that is pressuring you and controlling you to stay...

posted December 09, 2007 04:42 PM            

I am 37 years old with my Moon and Chiron in the 7th house. My moon opposes Uranus and squares my Mercury. I have never been one of those people that can't be without a relationship. I have spent more time "single" than in a relationship and have always chosen to wait rather than just "be" in something in order to be a couple. And trust me, it was not for a lack in the opposite sex's trying to "get me" to commit.

I find people that constantly "need" that attention to be weak and they usually end up with their souls sucked from them from some jerk-wad that knows they are "lonely".

I really enjoyed being single and preferred living alone until I met my husband. HE was worth waiting for

If anything I would look at the person's Sun aspects as well as what is in their first house. I have Pluto conjunct ascendant and Uranus in my 1st house. Basically, I am independant and I love my space. Also, superficial friendships or relationships have never been nor ever will be for me. I prefer a couple of close friends and a few acquaintances that I will socialize with.

posted December 09, 2007 05:08 PM              

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I don't know about that 7th house thing. I have 5 planets in the 7th house and I am NOT like that in any way shape or fashion. I can't stand that trait in people either, I think it's silly and weak. I know that's mean to say, but it's just one of my pet peeves.

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Me too. It just seems that people who ALWAYS have a boyfriend or girlfriend cannot really care about the person - I mean, it can't be true love. True love is rare, and you can't find it with everyone. You're lucky if you even find it twice in your lifetime.

People who are always "in love" are never in love. These are usually the same people who end a relationship of long duration and say, "I never loved him/her." I've seen it happen.

It's not unusual for some people to wake up one day in their 40's and realize they never were in love (not really) despite always having someone.

posted December 09, 2007 10:42 PM              

(actually, we haven't been in touch for a while; I'm a bit angry with her but that's a different story LOL)

anyway, she's a Cappy with the moon in Scorpio and Gemini rising. Her sun is in the 7th conjunct Mars and she has a stellium in her 6th house. Saturn is also in her 4th house conjunct the IC.

I've known her for six years and the longest she's gone between boyfriends is a week. Granted, she's been with the current guy for a long time and they're engaged, but before him there were about six guys (in a period of about two months). She told me she was never without a boyfriend in high school or college (before I knew her).

For her, I think it's a matter of poor self-esteem. Sometimes people who are like this think they're nothing without a boyfriend/girlfriend and maybe they can't stand their own company. My friend will stay with someone no matter how they treat her because she doesn't want to be alone.

It's hard for me to understand this because I'm the total opposite. I'm 30, never been married (though almost, once) and am not looking to be in a relationship. I have that Sag moon which makes me a bit independent but I also have some Saturn aspects that make me wary of relationships (Venus square Saturn, Saturn square Ascendant from 4th house, Mars Square Saturn, Uranus Square Saturn).

posted December 10, 2007 07:49 AM            

I've been in a LTR for eons but back when I was single, I was perfectly happy and comfortable with my single status. The only thing that bothered me about it was when other people tried to set me up or interrogated me about why I was single. Drove me nuts. I hated the presumption that OF COURSE you're supposed to be in a relationship. I first need the right guy before I am at all interested in being in a relationship.

posted December 10, 2007 12:21 PM            

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I think of partnership as two whole people, self-sufficient and comfortable in their own skins, who come together for mutual giving and receiving, benefiting each other by the sharing of their accumulated life experiences.

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But don't you think that's bit of an oxymoron? A Self-Sufficient partnership? If two people are self-sufficient and thus wouldn't need any lessons in life to learn form another person then a partnership wouldn't be needed now wouldn't it?

posted December 10, 2007 02:48 PM            

But sometimes I think it would be nice to have someone besides my family, who really loves me. Sure I can take care of myself, but sometimes it's nice to not have to be strong all the time and have someone take care of me occasionally. In my life, I'm the one who takes care of everyone and solves everyone's problems and honestly, that can be a bit draining. Whenever I need help, I have no one to turn to. Instead, I've got to figure out how to solve my problem.

posted December 11, 2007 03:05 PM              

Your response hit the nail on the head with this one too...

Sinderlou , I responded to a post very similiar here and I believe it will answer this question for you as well.

posted December 11, 2007 04:06 PM              

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me: Libra asc, cannot live without my boyfriend. It is much more than a boyfriend, it is his companionship and him just being my best friend. If something were to happen in our relationship I would be in shambles. Cancer moon, Aries sun.
boyfriend: Libra moon, he seems to me like he does love having that relationship with me, but I'm betting he would be less upset if something did happen to us. Maybe it's his Virgo sun. When he gets emotional, he lashes out in other ways than crying, he gets angry or moody...Cancer rising.

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This isn't the same thing. Just because you love your boyfriend and can't imagine being without him doesn't mean you can't be without a relationship - you just can't be w/o this one. It's different.

I'm referring to people that have a boyfriend or girlfriend just to have anyone.