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Author Topic:   Aries Man: Are the Afraid of Assertive Women?
DICO
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posted June 17, 2006 06:20 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

What type of women would attract an Aries?

I would say they like independent and strong ones, but why do they always run away once a woman takes the first step?
Is it a general thing with men, or is it arians only?


1- How should aries men be appraoched? Has it to be subtle and hinted or direct?


2- What attracts them in women (physically and mentally)?


3- If the Arian man seem very passionate about a lady and then change after a woman has made the first move.
Is it because they don't like assertive women or it's because they tend to ponder and consider the situation?

A have many many more questions, but I'll write them later
Thanks!

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Gooberzlostlovefound
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posted June 17, 2006 09:08 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Aries men are difficult. (Attractive, YES --but difficult). I don't know. I think they have extreeeeeeeeeemely high (and unrealisitc) standards and expectations for how a woman should be and act. I should probably let an Aries male come on here, though, and speak for himself.

An astrological study was done with a couple thousand people, trying to determine which signs are single. Aries men came up on top. My guess is that this is for a lot of reasons, some of which would be that:

1. They are just independent types

and

2.

They are looking for a kind of perfection that doesn't exist.

But then again, what do I know. I am a Capricorn female!! Not exactly a match made in heaven for a ram.

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Gooberzlostlovefound
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posted June 17, 2006 09:09 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
By the way...

Welcome to Linda-Land, DICO!

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sthenri
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posted June 17, 2006 07:01 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
If you are chatting with a male ram and offer to buy him dinner he may accept, but get emotional and he starts to worry about you, like a father or a brother. And then that ends the chemistry.

I don't know why really it's just that they tend to be fatherly and when that happens it kills the chemistry for me. If you are okay with a man telling you what to do then you will like Sag and Leos too, it's hidden the way they like you, but if you are assertive in the first place you won't see it.

Just trust your emotions and be giving, but take baby steps physically. Fire men are not the types to go home with you and just "hold you".

I know I've tried!

And yes Aries men love perfect women, saints, maddonas, virgins, anything but their wives who I assume they nag to death. I am very attracted to some Aries men for that reason, but in the end that need for purity is a turn off as I am ruled by Venus.

Natasha

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DICO
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posted June 18, 2006 01:43 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Gooberzlostlovefound and sthenri
Thanks a lot for your posts what you said relieved me a bit but I need more information.

I hate this state of being in limbo, pending, facing indecision.

I wish I could ask him directly, but he might think that I'm brash. And it seems that hints make him run away, let alone a direct appraoch.

OK, one more question,
Do Arian males feel threatened by successful women? Maybe that he knew how successful I am that put him off?
And do they mind older women ( a couple of years I means not many)?


Hey Aries males in the forum, be nice and let know more about you.
What type of women do you dream of (and be specific please :P )
Come one, I promise this won't be used againts you in the court of world

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freebird
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posted June 18, 2006 09:58 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Dico: You are not alone. I am going through same phrase where we have pretty friendly connection with this Aries guy and I am not sure what's happening. Last thing I heard from him was he was waiting for some decision in next month.

I think Aries are going through some phrase in their career or something.I think I can understand that as somehow I have gut feeling he isn't roaming someone else or avoiding me.It's just he is busy.

I have just gone busy as he has told me couple of times that sorry for being slow in communication.

I am pretty successful compared to him and matured. He knows that.Is that a problem for him ? I guess not, if he had he would have not been still taken my blunt and honest opinions. At times I do feel that

If I had any crisis I wouldn't talk about it and probably he is doing same.Ofcourse I go through where negative feelings in my head goes and says he is probably seeing someone else or those quick ***** but then I shhhh!!! that negative thought. Even if that's true well I would know.

I read in Linda's that they want women who is assertive but they shouldn't be dominating him so appreciate him. I think it's with every man.They expect you to be independent and smart.

I know I have been also feeling that I am doing all the chasing lately and I have told him that I know he is around and he cares.


What type of women would attract an Aries?

Confident, Honest, Understanding and one they can chase but I think chasing and knowing is only beginning part.After that bonding goes.

I would say they like independent and strong ones, but why do they always run away once a woman takes the first step? Is it a general thing with men, or is it arians only?

3- If the Arian man seem very passionate about a lady and then change after a woman has made the first move.
Is it because they don't like assertive women or it's because they tend to ponder and consider the situation?

I would say it's general.Men normally find it difficult to show emotions and loving feelings all the time. Men tend to get relaxed or consider it.Womens tend to worry and think negative as we crave attention all the time.

1- How should aries men be appraoched? Has it to be subtle and hinted or direct?

Subtle...

2- What attracts them in women (physically and mentally)?

I guess for Aries Men it's not only physical or mental ofcourse his chart would say more.
It's confidence in herself and relationship.Ability to understand him.Ability to be little submissive and let him be the men while you are still being capable to do your own things.

This is what I can figure out from my personal experience.

I wonder if there are many Aries guys here.

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Lialei
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posted June 18, 2006 12:29 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My ex-husband was Aries.
(just now getting divorced after being together 13 years).

Yes, they do like to initiate the first moves themselves and seem to be turned off by aggressive pursuits.
It seems, they like the challenge of going for women who they may not be able to get.
But, once the very first moves are made, they like directness and honesty and aren't into game-playing. Like someone who would pretend to play "hard to get". Any pretending, manipulations or fakeness is sensed out and they would lose trust easily if they felt a woman were playing head-games with them.

Our first conversations were so refreshing, because they were so honest and real. Every move seemed so natural, and it was nice to just be together and talk because we wanted to, without worrying about how it would be perceived by each other as too much, too this or that, etc.

In the end, the woman they will choose will most probably be independant and strong in herself. Yes, there is a tendancy to idealize a woman, setting her up on an angelic pedestal. It seems its important for them to feel that she is above other women.

That's how my husband was with me. He had a terrible view from past hurtful experiences of women (including his mom)...and I was always the miraculous exception in his eyes. The woman who was more honest, more beautiful, more kind, more intelligent, etc, etc.

Of course, it's nice to be thought of this way, but can cause problems later on, if the pedestal is so fixed, that there is no room for growth or expansion.
And no room to be human.


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sthenri
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posted June 18, 2006 01:08 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I have Venus in Aries so I know and admire Aries men but Aries and Leo men can suffer from this idea that they are better than others and expect more. And they tend to believe their opinions matter more than anything else, they mold their women like children and then they are very secure and never run. Sag men do not do this, they are listeners and like to be more equal, which is why I am better at chasing them.

But for Aries, they do like you to chase romantically but not in a demanding way. If you beg and plead and cry for attention they won't mind at all, they like it because it's real, but if you don't have something else besides womanly charms you are history. You have to be smart and offer him something, a mother to his children, a helper, something.

Aries men are hard workers and want a woman who can build a future for and with him.

Imagine some superhero and his woman, that is what you have to be, trusting and focused on him. It's a hard balancing act so I tend to focus on my Aries male friend and then leave him alone for a while because he is being stubborn and not listening and then I go back when I have more to talk about.

I can't imagine how that works in a relationship EXCEPT my Aries Grandmother and Virgo Grandfather loved each other because he ran their business and she managed the household.

This way she could be alone sometimes and be right about something all the time and he needed her and vice versa. The Business was their child and her opinions on it.

Another Aries/Libra couple I knew were very happy for 35 years and he the Aries had land, she would stay home and sew and cook, and he would roam the land, ride horses and come in simply to eat and watch tv and leave. He wasn't much company but he thought she was an Angel, and always ate her food not matter how bad it was. He wouldn't even eat gourmet food or go to weddings because he wanted her cooking only.

He was a terrible house host, and demanding, and never said two words to her in conversation so she mainly had guests over to talk. But he loved her until he was 93 and stuck around.

I guess that's the best you can hope for, good looks, charm and clean socks don't come with the package all the time.

Assertive and angry are different. If you are chasing an Aries man he loves you, if you are ****** off he's not happy. I have a very demanding job and get ****** off at work all the time and get paid for it, so now I am finally able to have relationships with fire men.

But only Sag so far, and maybe Aries as friends, maybe one day I will know more.

Natasha
Taurus/Cancer Moon

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lalalinda
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posted June 18, 2006 03:01 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for lalalinda     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
welcome DICO

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Aphrodite
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posted June 18, 2006 03:26 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
As an Aries girl, my insight is . . .

Most Aries are big flirts. Flirting is fun and giggles, we love it. It's just in our nature. We flirt with babies, check out people in the grocery store, old and young, and just for fun and kicks with an unusual person.

So when the person who's been flirting back starts to get serious about getting together . . . and we were only having fun . . . that's when we get into minor trouble sometimes.

Since I didn't know the person very well and there was no evidence of legitimate attachment, I would use those justifications to disappear. I keep it light and move on, and would feel okay intuiting that there was no serious emotional damage that the other person could experience . . . unlike what other signs are more prone to doing, like game playing, power stuff and so on.

Just thoughts.

Good luck.

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lioneye68
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posted June 18, 2006 04:28 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Aries men simply don't like me. I'm not sure exactly why, but they always seem to want to argue with me. Even if they don't know anything about the subject. That annoys me to no end.

But, one thing I have noticed, is that if you cooperate too willingly with their seduction, they lose interest. They like a woman to be a bit of a challenge, but not in a confrontational way - more of a detached way. People that are confrontational get compartmentalized as a sparing partner, and it's hard to change their impression of you once you're thought of this way. They tend to be black & white thinkers.

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sthenri
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posted June 18, 2006 06:18 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Its true they like detached, so for example I knew one who owned a Casino (a new one of course) and if I was sexy he could care less, BUT if I had ideas on how to promote his casino and looked sexy at the same time he thought that was cool. it was his ideal, smart and sexy and unable to see him as a sexy guy. Maybe he wanted a woman to see the real man underneath?

He didn't like glib, he wanted "honesty" but I take that to mean real conversation, because he flirted all the time. To talk to a pretty girl who is not flirting with you, is a turn on for an Aries, I am told because this particular one thought every woman needed a man, or thought women were needy.

My response to that is men make women needy by not being man enough. of course he liked that because he could prove what a man he was
"I got money, I'm a man"

You know that kind of line.

Aries men like to feed their egos, and can't believe a woman doesn't need someone, deep down I don't think they are so self sufficient either, it's got to be an act. BUT if I ever get too close then I get snapped at because Aries men don't like to appear too vulnerable.

Personally I believe they are very emotional and easily influenced and don't like to show it.

Natasha

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breakfast on pluto
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posted June 23, 2006 01:23 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
my lovely boyfriend is aries...i am scorpio..

they like adventure..and beauty...be quick..do everthing in light speed...be artistic...be intellectual....for my opinion they like at first cool woman..then they looking for directness..

i dont know if my aries has so many pisces he is very romantic...idealistic...but yes argumentative..(my scorpio sun like also...)

good luck girl...

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MysticMelody
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posted May 28, 2009 09:50 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
bump for anyone interested in this topic

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Taurean_Scorpion
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posted May 28, 2009 12:30 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Taurean_Scorpion     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My Aries is very honest, one of most honest men I've come across. I ask him something and he'll tell me the truth even though it would make him look bad.

He's told me he likes my independence and directness, especially my honesty.
And he does put me on a pedestal and loves romance.

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fatinkerbell
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posted May 28, 2009 07:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for fatinkerbell     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I used to be married to an Aries guy and for Aries is like the child of the zodiac. I'd suggest you approach your Aries almost like a mother-figure.

------------------
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter.

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Taurean_Scorpion
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posted May 29, 2009 03:55 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Taurean_Scorpion     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
They like directness and independent women. Is directness the same as assertiveness?
They are also very Impulsive so they are good with people aren't so much.
The Aries-Scorpio combination is not easy but it's passionate and with some understanding could work... The Aries-Taurus is more difficult...
Strange that my bf is has an Aries Sun & Moon and I have a Taurus Sun & Scorpio Moon.

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mab42
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posted December 14, 2010 02:23 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mab42     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm an aries man & I'm chasing a capricorn woman. I'm attracted to the way she keeps giving mixed signals. Looking at me one time I see her then completely ignoring me the next. If I talk to her its like I have to do all the talking so I dont really know if she's interested or not. But they say thats how Capricorns are, so I dont know what to think.

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TrueTaurus
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posted December 15, 2010 10:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TrueTaurus     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm not really sure how to answer this. I've been with my Aries bf for two years, and from my experience I see that he does love to be in control. He absolutely hates any situation where he is being controlled, feels controlled, or told what to do. I try not to do that but I am unfortunately a control freak. He has trouble with doing things in moderation. He will do what he wants regardless of anyone or anything... I think that Arians take some time to grow up. My guy is an Aries/Aries. he's impulsive, never plans, hardly ever on time...and it affects his life. The girl that attracts him is a girl who he feels he can control, but not TOO submissive. A girl who lets him FEEL like he is in control would work. The reason they may not like assertive women might be the same reason because he feels he's not wearing the pants. However a little unpredictability, independence, and sometimes assertive woman is nice. That'll keep him on his toes.

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TrueTaurus
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posted December 15, 2010 10:59 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TrueTaurus     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Lol I forgot to add. Play hard to get, don't be easy, be a little demanding, know what you want. That'll make his head spin like crazy.

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inamotion
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posted December 18, 2010 02:51 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for inamotion     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My sister is dating an Aries man. She is Taurus, which generally you hear the two do not work well together. I dated an Aries a few years back and we did not do well at all.

Him and my sister are very happy together. From what I have seen of him and what she has told me about him (a lot in her gushy love rants), he is not an extreme Aries to the point of being arrogant. However, he's 22 and she is his first girlfriend, so I would agree that Aries men do have very high standards for women. In addition, from what I know, most would be turned off if a woman were to ask them out. My sister's Aries told her that if she would have pursued him, he would have been turned off. So Aries are definitely not Cancer men in the department that they like to be chased by women. Instead, the Aris wants to pursue and grab what is his.

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inamotion
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posted December 18, 2010 02:54 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for inamotion     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
To add a bit more that I forgot, as an above poster wrote, Aries men hate being controlled. The one I dated had to be dominate ALL the time, which drove me insane. He was a wonderful kisser but when it came time to having conversations, he was arrogant and had to try to be better than me at everything. But I do most certainly suggest playing hard to get because Aries likes a challenge.

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Betty Boop
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posted December 18, 2010 05:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Betty Boop     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I think Aries men have nothing against assertive or even aggressive women. In fact they like them just as much as they'd like any assertive/aggressive being out there.

But these women would become *mates*.

Because Aries lives in lalaland romantically - and in lalaland there is always a princess and a prince.. and the princess does not behave like the prince's best mate.

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coconutcancermoon
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posted December 20, 2010 01:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for coconutcancermoon     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Aries! SMH good luck!

From my experience, you cannot show any type of assertiveness, apparently it's a turn off.
Also,(from my experience) in their minds their ideal woman is drop dead gorgeous, never mind personality or intelligence. I could be wrong though.

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redshoes
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posted April 22, 2011 07:22 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for redshoes     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Yep i agree with the above poster, aries men like their women to look perfect and be sexual all the time

lol

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