posted September 10, 2007 10:38 AM         

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How about sex,chemestry,passion?

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In my opinion, love is love and sex is sex. These two are different things, and one thing does not necessarily imply another. But it takes these two ingredients for a love (couple) relationship to born. ^_^

posted September 10, 2007 10:48 AM         

"Yes, but how do you know when you should let go and when there is a chance of a fight for what you beleive, I see people making this mistake all the time."

Yes, i do think the same.
Well, the only way you can know it if you can hear your inner voice. And believe me, these are not just empty words.
The problem is that nowadays we live for our ego mostly, and forget about our higher purpose of life. And its a huge mistake.

Many people idealize the so called "soulmates" and think its just for happiness. Yes, on one hand of course, its one of the greatest feeling to find those who are such close to our soul, but on the other hand, these relationships can be the most painful ones as well.
Especially when two soulmates are not meant to be together this life (or just for a short period or not in that role what we would like). The problem with many relationship is that we dont (want to) realize the higher purpose.
Love and being together with our Special One is beautiful, but if its not their karma for this life, then they not only cause harm in this life, but also will take karmic debt for their next life.

posted September 10, 2007 11:08 AM         

Destiny is what we make of it. We control our destiny. I really don't believe in fate. We make our own fate and destiny through our choices, and through other people's choices that affect our lives.

You can sit back and let other people's choices affect your life or you can take control and make your own choices for your own life. Either way, it's not destiny or pre-ordained. Someone is making a choice.

MM

posted September 10, 2007 11:58 AM         

I agree with you on what you said.
But dont you believe in karma?
That every of us is born with their own karmic lesson to learn, and when we get too far from our way, life would force us back to our direction?

posted September 10, 2007 02:33 PM         

I'd also like to believe that there is a higher power looking over us. But I don't.

I have grown to be very skeptic over the years. I have seen a lot of bad things happen to good people. I digress it all to people making bad choices not realizing or not caring that the choices they are making affects other people, directly or indirectly.

But, this thread is about LOVE - romantic love between two people, not destiny or karma. Let's celebrate Love.

Love is the only wonderful thing I believe in, even when my life is going to shreds right now.

posted September 10, 2007 02:57 PM         

This is my favourite lyrics - full of magic and tears...

"My heart was swimming
in words gathered by the wind
My voice bounded
into a cloud-carried tomorrow

My heart trembled
in the moon-swayed mirror
Soft tears
spilled with a stream of stars

Isn't it beautiful?
If we could walk, hand in hand,
I'd want to go
to your town, your home, in your arms

I dream of being
against your chest
my body in your keeping
disappearing into the evening

Words halted by wind are
a gentle illusion
A tomorrow torn by clouds is
the voice of a distant place

My heart that had been
in a moon-blurred mirror that flowed
Those stars that trembled and spilled
cannot hide my tears

Isn't it beautiful?
If we could walk, hand in hand,
I'd want to go
to your town, your home, in your arms

posted September 10, 2007 03:02 PM         

"My dream of
your face
that I softly touch
melts in the morning"

posted September 12, 2007 08:55 AM         

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the moment i read Dulce' statement i knew this was what i wanted to say .
so i am trying to elobrate , NAM (dulce , just check out if i am right )

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Yes! We think alike again.....what you said is almost exactly what I meant. Cancer-cancer connection?

posted September 12, 2007 09:26 AM         

I like to analize situations by example, so here it goes, last year I met this guy that totally blew me away and I still think of him,he has actually mention not even a month ago that he has a crush on me but he is attached and he has to do the right thing for the love of his girlfriend.
Now, how f*cked up is this? this sounds like a state of mind to me rather than love (and I am not saying he has it for me) but he is making himself stay with his girlfriend and doing the right thing (he is a cancer too , imagine that!) so .... because of being the "good" people that cancers are he is aactually lying to his girlfriend and staying in a relationship were he is not into a 100% and convincing himself this is what he has to do because is the right thing, and don't take me wrong I give him kudos for this, he is obviously a fighter and he wants to make it work at all cost.But if I was the girl in this situation I would feel torn that he does not love me enough for me to be the only one in his mind.Is this wrong?

Furthermore...
About 2 months ago my best friend and I hooked up together, now this guy and I love each other very much, we live in the same house (he is my roomate) and we both do a ot of things for the other person without expecting nothing in return, we really care.
Well, we got drunk one night and things happened so from that point on we (being in the state of mind that the right thing has to prevail) started a short relationship but I felt in my heart it wasn't the right thing to do and after digging for the truth he felt the same way because he is still in ove with his ex wife and I pointed this out to him even know he was planning already on us getting married !!!!!
how insane is this?
This two scenarios to me say that people will "settle"<---ugly word used here , or will get on that "state" of mind that whatever they are doing, theya re doing it because they have been with the person for a long time , or this is the right thing to do when in reality they are not listening to their hearts and their emotions.

See, the key here is that emotions can not be controlled, I am sorry but THEY CAN NOT! you can choose to look away or put them to sleep, you can choose to keep busy and not think about the person that you really love because he/she is not in the same page with you... but when you lay down at night and daydream of the perfect person to cuddle with before you fall asleep, sometimes that person is not the person that is really laying next to you, or sometimes that person does not exist, and that is only because of one reason, you are just not in love.Simple as that.

posted September 12, 2007 09:53 AM         

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See, the key here is that emotions can not be controlled, I am sorry but THEY CAN NOT! you can choose to look away or put them to sleep, you can choose to keep busy and not think about the person that you really love because he/she is not in the same page with you... but when you lay down at night and daydream of the perfect person to cuddle with before you fall asleep, sometimes that person is not the person that is really laying next to you, or sometimes that person does not exist, and that is only because of one reason, you are just not in love.Simple as that.

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posted September 12, 2007 10:15 AM         

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I am sorry but I still don't get how two cancer people here (Duce and Cancerrg) think that love is not an emotion but a state of mind, don't take me wrong I respect what think and beleive as I always do with everything, but I must admit that I think right now that both of you have never felt truely in love

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Ermmm, I think you're wrong on that last part there (especially with Rg). And loving someone and being in love is not the same thing and I think you're confusing the two. The former is constant, the latter being something people go in and out of all the time and is usually romantic. Sorry, but nobody is ever in love like 24/7....I'm not scared to admit that I'm not. And this goes into my point.

And my point is love is a state of mind and not an emotion because emotions come and go and love does not. Even my Philosophy Teacher form Highschool told us this and at first I didn't understand but now I get it because I've been through it whether w/ my family or my S.O. Let me better explain, you see: one day I may not feel anything for my S.O. (this only happens when I'm out of touch with my feelings, so I don't feel much for ANYBODY.....and luckily this isn't often) but I still do care for him very much. And they way I know for sure is that if something bad happened to him on the day I felt nothing for him, I know I would be worried sick, frantic, whatever. If love was really an emotion, I would feel nothing for him and not care if he were gone. Its the reason why some ex's still love eachother even after the romantic feelings are gone along w/ the relationship or marraige. And it goes into family love, platonic love, and so on.

I strongly believe its a state of mind because its more than the emotion of the moment and definitely the essence of him that I completely accept. Its how he naturally is that I love so much. I go through many emotions a day so how can I call any of them love if none are constant?

posted September 12, 2007 10:34 AM         

I think we are almost in the same track but we are using different terminology.
But I have to work now so I will anaize this further more later on and come up with new questions to get to the bottom of things.

posted September 12, 2007 10:38 AM         

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Cancerrg wrote:
btw , waht was your husband sign , Nam ?

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Sorry I forgot to reply to this, he is a Taurus.Moon in Virgo, Asc. Scorpio.Venus in Aries and Mars in Sag.

posted September 12, 2007 11:56 AM         

The reason why are so much depressed people nowadays, is becasue we live for our ego.
But our ego always want to mislead us.
It wants to enjoy the time, while doesnt know what REAL HAPPINESS means.
Because its beyond our ego.
REAL HAPPINESS is when you can do your life lesson, your karma.
But for accomplish it, you have to beat your ego.
And for me REAL LOVE is when you follow your path, your destiny, your karma.
And it require very deep self-analyse.

You can be with your "Love of your dreams" but if its not your karma this life, you never would be truly happy.

Many says, Aquarian influenced people are cold, not emotional etc.
Which true, but its not becasue they cant love, just the opposite, they love much deeper than others would think.
And this is why they cant show it, its too much, too deep for the ego to handle it.

At the moment we can start to live to our Higher Self, we will be able to find our inner peace, our REAL HAPPINESS, our REAL LOVE
But its hard.
Very hard.
But not impossible.

The reason i say all these things, becasue i have been through my hardest time.
During several months, i was crying everyday, felt in the middle of nothing, and had moments when i felt i cant do it any more.
But im still here, and since i can see a little light in the darkness, everything seems to be much easier.
I started to truly believe in the Higher WOrld, believe in my REAL SELF, believe in REAL LOVE and this faith what gives me courage and force.
We can lose anybody and anything, except ourselves.

posted September 12, 2007 12:42 PM         

For example, since i have Sun in my 8th house, i find the right people or things when i would wait the least.
That was how i found the guy im in love with.
edited: I learned more from him, than i've ever before. I dont know what will be our future, the only thing im sure its, that he changed my life forever and helped me to find my real self...

The first step is to explore yourself.
Because if you know yourself, you will know who will be the right partner for you.
At least this is my opinion.

posted September 12, 2007 03:25 PM         

How do you stop yourself from being happy or sad? or fall in love?

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Emotions can be controlled.
If you are strong enough inside.

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Emotions cannot be controlled. What you do with how you feel is the only thing you can control. I may be in love but I don't have to act on it. I may not like someone, but I don't have to go buy a gun and shoot him. I may be sad but I don't have to cry, etc.

Not being true to yourself and recognize your emotions is the saddest thing in the world. It doesn't have anything to do with Ego.

When you deny your emotions, you live like a zombie. If you are hurt in love, you do your best to move on. Open your heart so that someone else might have a chance to come in. Love again. Don't go to sleep for the rest of your life...

Strong people accept their emotions and control their fate. They do not ignore and try to control their emotions but rather accept it and control their actions.

*Edited to add...
What you do with your emotions can be controlled by your Ego.

Just my two cents,

posted September 12, 2007 03:36 PM         

quote:

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How do you choose a partner

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posted September 12, 2007 04:35 PM         

quote:

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How do you stop yourself from being happy or sad? or fall in love?

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posted September 12, 2007 04:53 PM         

We are essentially in agreement... just a different use of words.

When I say "emotion", I mean "feeling". "Emotional" is the reaction to an "emotion".

Cheers,

posted September 12, 2007 05:03 PM         

So, feelings can not be controlled? right Cancerrg and Dulce?

posted September 12, 2007 08:40 PM         

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So, feelings can not be controlled? right Cancerrg and Dulce?

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Wait a minute, neither of us said anything about feelings being able to be controlled. We just said we don't consider love a feeling because of the fact that feelings are not constant. No, I don't believe I can control my emotions but as a Cap Asc/virgo mooner I DO control my emotional expressions;ie. I don't cry very easily, I don't smile alot in public, the only thing tht ever comes out is my short temper in a *flash* (mars in aries square uranus...something I can't really control).

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And, what about this thing about the sun in the 7th house? can you explain that to me please?

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