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Author
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Topic: Am I about to commit suicide soon?
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Astrid
Knowflake Posts: 87
From:
Registered: Oct 2013
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posted October 18, 2013 02:27 PM
  
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Astrid
Knowflake Posts: 87
From:
Registered: Oct 2013
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posted October 18, 2013 02:49 PM
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Astrid
Knowflake Posts: 87
From:
Registered: Oct 2013
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posted October 18, 2013 02:55 PM
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m.blade
Knowflake Posts: 716
From: idek
Registered: Mar 2013
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posted October 18, 2013 07:02 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Astrid:
I don't feel suicidal. but sometimes there is a choice between really ****** bad and... worse. This is simply it!To me astrology doesn't influence my day with choices. From what I see it's a parallell world. What happens can be seen in astrology, but if anyone can say exactly what will happen beforehand... I think hardly anyone has that capacity. And if the person does exsist, he/she might not even be into astrology. Life is mathematics. What happens to me will be seen in the stars, but if you look at the stars you might be able to calculate it beforehand. I have been given the chance to study astrology. I am trying to use it to give myself hope. I have most planets on the right hand side of the horoscope. That means I live feeling that I can't influence my life myself hardly at all. I will more or less get only what others want to give. Circumstances beyond control and others will are in charge of my life, regardless of what I want or try to achieve. i wish I had them on the left. Then I would feel sure that the choices I make is what makes my life. I would feel like I was in charge. That would had been great!
 astrology can help you understand yourself. It provides perspective and gives you quite a vague but at the same time quite valuable answer to questions we don't know the answers to or we fear. I'm happy your using astrology to your advantage. it is a beautiful thing but I guess I answered the title quite bluntly. I just think the stars do play a role in life but it's also up to us to put in the effort. Your natal chart in itself is something we learn, education, spirituality. It is a more analytical approach to the complexity of ourselves. Uncovering and understanding out chart is a complexity in itself.
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Astrid
Knowflake Posts: 87
From:
Registered: Oct 2013
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posted October 19, 2013 12:57 AM
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Astrid
Knowflake Posts: 87
From:
Registered: Oct 2013
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posted October 19, 2013 01:40 AM
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starmoon
Knowflake Posts: 1080
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 19, 2013 08:43 PM
Hi Astrid. I have most of my planets on the left side of my chart and it doesn't make me any happier - people still hurt me, misunderstand me, and don't treat me how I want. Your chart is fine, and the struggles you may be facing are struggles that everyone faces, you're not alone.Astrology can be used for many things, but since you're feeling down already I would suggest staying away from trying to forecast future events with your chart(s) - that could only lead to further feelings of hopelessness. Just stay in the present. Look at your natal for ways to solve your immediate problems and then (when life begins to get better) look towards the future. IP: Logged |
ProudLeo
Knowflake Posts: 182
From: Aubrey, Texas, 76227
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted October 20, 2013 03:10 AM
Your "handicap" may be that you rely in your natal chart as a rock solid description of yourself as opposed to using it to find the areas in which we need to improve ourselves or to find our strengths and use them. Just because someone has negative aspects in their chart (we all do!) does not mean we are doomed to live out those aspects....it simply means those are personal struggles we will have to over come. So, you know a struggle for you is communication...well then you should start working on building your social skills. Go to the library or use the Internet, read everything you can about social skills, communication, networking, relationships, social behavior etc. teach yourself the skills you need...no matter what it takes, no matter how difficult, frustrating, or slow...do it. Learn what you need to learn to overcome your weaknesses. This will also build self confidence as you begin to change yourself....a person who believes in themselves will attract others with the same positive energy. You attract unfavorable people now because of the energy that you exude and the environments that you are in. Stop expecting others to make you happy by their words and actions...you have to make you happy before you can expet anyone to come along and be attracted to you. Find your nearest homeless shelter, they have guidance and career councelors; talk to them. Get a job...doesn't matter what, but pu into practice the skills that you are teaching yourself...think of every day at work as a learning experience rather than as a chance to get what you want...or another day that you aren't getting what you want. The thing is that you aren't getting what you want because you aren't doing what it takes to get there...and you aren't being honest with yourself. Also...write...keep journals, write everything down!! And then find something to write about....if you can't creative write, fine, then find a subject that you are absolutely passionate about and learn everything you can and constructively write about it. I'm thinking maybe, eventually, you could write a book about overcoming negative placements...as you take the necessary steps to overcome yours, you could then help others by writing and sharing your knowledge and experiences. Now get busy...you've got work to do!! Don't give up...the rest of the world needs you to learn your life purpose and lessons so they can learn from you! IP: Logged |
redshoes
Knowflake Posts: 820
From:
Registered: Nov 2010
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posted October 20, 2013 03:25 AM
Lots of people are thinking this way of late..we are going through a huge vibrational shift and some of my friends feel the sameI have also hit rock bottom of late, i dont actually want to die but sometimes feel *can i do this any longer* The problem is we are taught that thinking about suicide is wrong..whereas it is a part of the human psyche It will pass....stay with it  IP: Logged |
ProudLeo
Knowflake Posts: 182
From: Aubrey, Texas, 76227
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted October 20, 2013 03:51 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Astrid:
I don't feel suicidal. but sometimes there is a choice between really ****** bad and... worse. This is simply it!To me astrology doesn't influence my day with choices. From what I see it's a parallell world. What happens can be seen in astrology, but if anyone can say exactly what will happen beforehand... I think hardly anyone has that capacity. And if the person does exsist, he/she might not even be into astrology. Life is mathematics. What happens to me will be seen in the stars, but if you look at the stars you might be able to calculate it beforehand. I have been given the chance to study astrology. I am trying to use it to give myself hope. I have most planets on the right hand side of the horoscope. That means I live feeling that I can't influence my life myself hardly at all. I will more or less get only what others want to give. Circumstances beyond control and others will are in charge of my life, regardless of what I want or try to achieve. i wish I had them on the left. Then I would feel sure that the choices I make is what makes my life. I would feel like I was in charge. That would had been great!
The grass is always greener. All of my placements are on the top left...I wondered if that meant anything. With that, I'm a leo sun, scorp rising, sag moon. My experience is that I'm seen as an enigma...the odd ball...but not the outcast. I'm the one people rely in, trust in fall on...I attract weak people by the masses, they are clingy and needy and I help them...I motivate them, advise them, teach them, instruct them, lead them, encourage them....and they suck me dry. So I am sure to work on myself as well...always learning new things and chasing my many aspirations...they see and they follow...I'm a spectacle. I have a talent for learning, I understand things very quickly and can expand on those thoughts and ideas...but I am never sufficed....the hunger to "know" never stops. It is hard for me to sit still...if I am not engaged in something mentally active. I feel as if I always have to be "doing" and so it is nearly impossible for me to sit and talk with my kids or anyone else just for the sake of talking...this makes me feel distant and disconnected emotionally with my loved ones. They have all gotten over thinking I will fail because they have seen me master everything I put my mind to....If I say it, I WILL do it...come hell or high water, I will...and I always do....but I am exhausted. I have unbelievable luck and success...if a life throws me a curve ball (everyone gets curve balls!) then I throw it right back. People are always Amazed at his well I handle things and how successful I am at turning a problem around to benefit myself....they admire me for my success and accomplishments and good fortune....but they don't know me, they just want my crumbs. I feel as if I am always on stage...the pressure of looking, fitting, and playing the part is excruciatingly tiresome and often unrewarding. I still don't get what I really want...an equal partner who has the same passions and desires as I (and there are many!) and wants to travel life with me...without abandon....but I am here, stuck being a puppet for the weak because they need my backbone, intelligence, stamina, endurance, gut, heart, strength, wit...and I love them and I wouldn't ever leave them, but I still feel lonely, isolated, used, misunderstood. They all rely in me so much but they don't even really know me...the me inside. I'm surrounded by success, prosperity, people...but inside I'm screaming. I deal with it by moderately doing things that feed my inner hunger...working in myself...and continuing to give others what they need from me. I have yet to find the individual who I can share my true self with, but someday I know I WILL (that's the Leo motto). the point is that there is no such thing is a perfect placement...everyone has negative aspects, everyone has their set of obstacles to overcome. Even if someone looks good from the outside, I guarantee you, they have obstacles they face. It is our choice how to handle those. We recognize our weaknesses and we either live in submission to them or we fight them like hell. IP: Logged |
Astrid
Knowflake Posts: 87
From:
Registered: Oct 2013
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posted October 20, 2013 11:58 AM
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Astrid
Knowflake Posts: 87
From:
Registered: Oct 2013
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posted October 20, 2013 12:15 PM
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Julz87
Knowflake Posts: 386
From: Houston Texas
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted October 20, 2013 12:55 PM
watch and THINK...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zvkbHIrrrvU IP: Logged |
milly
Knowflake Posts: 235
From:
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted October 20, 2013 01:05 PM
Hi... I see Pluto squared your pluto few years ago... maybe you are still busy rebuilding yourself. I am actually also from the 70s... and lot of changes around me leave me sometines scared and without options. Now I am trying to start my own business... explore the meaning of the blockages.... maybe you need to answer to your true calling.I like your chart, it is balanced... challenges and help are there. I focused in your kiron.... it trines neptune and it is conj your mc... it sextiles you moon saturn.... have you tried to help/teach others? Maybe study psychology, alternayive healing, nurse, medicine etc.... or any field that you can guide others, rather than seek your "cure" in what others say. Be the leader... in service of others. Maybe it will help. Hugs. You are not alone in these difficult times. Milly. IP: Logged |
milly
Knowflake Posts: 235
From:
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted October 20, 2013 01:16 PM
Sorry I got confused your kiron is in the 11 th house... but i think stills applies as your mc is pisces and yor neptunes in the sixth house... trining kiron in the 11th... actually gives more info.... you can play these roles in corporations, clubs, associating with others to reach more people. Full of possibilities. IP: Logged |
ProudLeo
Knowflake Posts: 182
From: Aubrey, Texas, 76227
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted October 21, 2013 02:06 AM
I agree with milly.....I got the feeling you should be helping other people through your life purpose...but you have to find and live your purpose first and you can't do that by relying in other people to make you life happen for you. You have to so that. We all have rejection and hardships...some more than others, true...but everyone has their hardships they must overcome. There is nothing you can do to change other people, but you can change yourself...you have to pin point the problem and do whatever it takes to learn how to overcome it then you can start living your life purpose. You aren alone, I'm sure each if us on here could tell you the difficult things we have faced. I am certain that your struggles are hard but you have to convince yourself that nothing is too hard to fight and overcome...and I'm not saying that's an easy task, but it is what has to be done. The world will not change for you and people will not cater to your needs, you have to meet your needs and learn to adapt to the world. IP: Logged |
ProudLeo
Knowflake Posts: 182
From: Aubrey, Texas, 76227
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted October 21, 2013 02:11 AM
I agree with milly.....I got the feeling you should be helping other people through your life purpose...but you have to find and live your purpose first and you can't do that by relying in other people to make you life happen for you. You have to so that. We all have rejection and hardships...some more than others, true...but everyone has their hardships they must overcome. There is nothing you can do to change other people, but you can change yourself...you have to pin point the problem and do whatever it takes to learn how to overcome it then you can start living your life purpose. You aren alone, I'm sure each if us on here could tell you the difficult things we have faced. I am certain that your struggles are hard but you have to convince yourself that nothing is too hard to fight and overcome...and I'm not saying that's an easy task, but it is what has to be done. The world will not change for you and people will not cater to your needs, you have to meet your needs and learn to adapt to the world. IP: Logged |
ProudLeo
Knowflake Posts: 182
From: Aubrey, Texas, 76227
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted October 21, 2013 02:11 AM
I agree with milly.....I got the feeling you should be helping other people through your life purpose...but you have to find and live your purpose first and you can't do that by relying in other people to make you life happen for you. You have to so that. We all have rejection and hardships...some more than others, true...but everyone has their hardships they must overcome. There is nothing you can do to change other people, but you can change yourself...you have to pin point the problem and do whatever it takes to learn how to overcome it then you can start living your life purpose. You aren alone, I'm sure each if us on here could tell you the difficult things we have faced. I am certain that your struggles are hard but you have to convince yourself that nothing is too hard to fight and overcome...and I'm not saying that's an easy task, but it is what has to be done. The world will not change for you and people will not cater to your needs, you have to meet your needs and learn to adapt to the world. IP: Logged |
Astrid
Knowflake Posts: 87
From:
Registered: Oct 2013
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posted October 21, 2013 03:40 AM
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milly
Knowflake Posts: 235
From:
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted October 21, 2013 05:10 AM
Astrid, I believe whay you say, I can imagine your pain.I am asc pisces, with neptune conj my mc. So there was a time in my live that I helped everyone in "need". Thats one of our problems. Our energy scatters sometimes going to wasteful/deceitful operations. Try to focus in a group/enterprise/dream where you can help in a framework... try learning to do some webdesign :-) and fill it with healthy recipes to loose weight or to gain weight... do some research into the topic most attract you and share it with others .... use that neptunian imagination. IP: Logged |
appleberry
Knowflake Posts: 1272
From:
Registered: Jun 2011
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posted October 22, 2013 02:18 AM
In the spirituality that I study, we say that the soul chooses it's life before it is conceived. This is to say that what you are going through now, you have chosen for yourself. Your soul chose this to challenge you, because it was the only way you would evolve in the way needed for what is coming next. There is a high road and a low road for every choice you make for what you have been given. Suicide is the low road of abandonment. I don't look down on anyone who chooses this road, and I'm sure we all think of it from time to time because none of our souls have given us an easy path to follow. But, you don't know what is coming next- your soul does. Have faith that all of this is for a reason and don't fear it so much. You have all that you need to get through this, and I think you know that. Work hard to learn what all this is about. Face your challenges and learn what you need to learn- if you don't learn it- you won't be able to move on. That goes for suicide too. The worst thing about abandoning this life, is that you will have to repeat it all anyway because your soul will send you back with the same challenges...IP: Logged |
redshoes
Knowflake Posts: 820
From:
Registered: Nov 2010
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posted October 22, 2013 08:54 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Astrid:
I have always been there to help everyone in need. So much I could had died to make sure they felt good. But then later on I find out that I was actually just being used by manipulation.My handicap is permanent. Please keep blaming me for how I was born, and for people hating me for it and always ruining my life!
People don't ruin our life ~ we allow them to, My 84 year old father on his deathbed swore he would never forgive or let go of the perception that his mother never loved him We have choices to allow people to ruin our lives or not. If i had allowed every person who died on me, lied to me, cheated on me etc etc to have ruined my life, it would have been over a long time ago We have ourselves to love .... that is what we have. If we expect others to make us happy, we may never feel that emotion
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lunatic
Knowflake Posts: 408
From:
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted October 22, 2013 12:49 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ProudLeo:
I agree with milly.....I got the feeling you should be helping other people through your life purpose...but you have to find and live your purpose first and you can't do that by relying in other people to make you life happen for you. You have to so that. We all have rejection and hardships...some more than others, true...but everyone has their hardships they must overcome. There is nothing you can do to change other people, but you can change yourself...you have to pin point the problem and do whatever it takes to learn how to overcome it then you can start living your life purpose. You aren alone, I'm sure each if us on here could tell you the difficult things we have faced. I am certain that your struggles are hard but you have to convince yourself that nothing is too hard to fight and overcome...and I'm not saying that's an easy task, but it is what has to be done. The world will not change for you and people will not cater to your needs, you have to meet your needs and learn to adapt to the world.
thank you! your thoughts helped me a lot..
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Astrid
Knowflake Posts: 87
From:
Registered: Oct 2013
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posted October 25, 2013 09:09 AM
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Haplesschild*
Knowflake Posts: 1290
From:
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted October 26, 2013 04:05 AM
We're not blaming you. We are trying to bring across the idea that you can't control what happens to you and can't stop other ppl's treatment...But you CAN choose your response to it. Please doo read the posts again, ppl care and have been offering you great advice. The first step is always the hardest. IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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