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Author Topic:   Pluto in synastry = hell?
jacque
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posted March 11, 2010 11:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
I have the following aspects with someone I'm close to:
My Mars trines his Pluto
My Sun trines his Pluto
My Mars squares his Venus
.. in short there are numerous aspects that indicate tremendous passion & intensity in our relationship.

Here r all the aspects:
Me Him
Sun Square Sun 1.29 -602
Sun Square Uranus 1.58 -119
Sun Sextile Neptune 1.47 53
Sun Trine Pluto 0.56 77
Mercury Square Sun 0.38 -358
Mercury Square Uranus 1.07 -118
Mercury Sextile Neptune 0.56 61
Mercury Trine Pluto 0.04 73
Mars Square Sun 2.48 -142
Mars Square Venus 0.36 -160
Mars Square Uranus 2.19 -76
Mars Trine Pluto 3.22 37
Jupiter Trine Mars 3.35 48
Jupiter Square Ascendant 2.20 -81
Jupiter Conjunction Midheaven 2.33 43
Saturn Sextile Venus 1.39 51
Saturn Conjunction Saturn 0.02 114
Uranus Conjunction Sun 3.38 113
Uranus Trine Moon 3.36 53
Uranus Conjunction Uranus 4.07 59
Neptune Square Moon 2.43 -79
Neptune Conjunction Neptune 3.03 62
Pluto Conjunction Pluto 1.21 69

The thought of this person with someone else is killing me.

Thanks to Astrology, to some extent, I understand why I feel this way. What I don't know is what to do about it!

What can I do to get over these powerful synastry aspects and move on?

I feel trapped, like I cannot get away .. if even for a moment I consider it then I am gripped with fear .. I just can't .. it's unthinkable. Is it Pluto in synastry that's causing this obsession?

Logically I know there is no future here, but I can't seem to accept it. I'm stuck, trapped in what can only be hell.

How do I find peace & accept that there is no future here and move on but still remain friends.

I've been meditating .. it helps but then .. if I skip even a day .. I'm back in hell. I can't think about anything else. I can't work. I've never felt like this before.

Can someone help me please?

Our Natal and Composite Chart:

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Lonake
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posted March 12, 2010 12:12 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message
If there's a lot of Pluto it's best to make a clean break.

All you have is Moon sq Neptune??

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jacque
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posted March 12, 2010 12:35 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
I think my neptune is squaring his moon. He also has moon sq neptune in his natal chart.

Clean Break is hard .. the friendship is too important. We have more than a decade of friendship. Besides, I feel depressed when I don't see him. the thought of not seeing him at all is terrifying.

looking at our charts: Is it only me? Does he feel the same way?

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Lonake
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posted March 12, 2010 01:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message
Well I'm looking again. You 2 really don't have a lot of Pluto! I was going off the topic title with the above post.

You sound really scared to make a break, but you 2 are really unsupported with this relationship. There's not enough support of the Moons to tolerate what you 2 have long term.

It's not Pluto you're referencing in your first post, It all sounds like SATURN, the planet of fear. BUT Pluto in CAPRICORN has been conjoining your Venus AND the composite Sun.

You're in for either a complete overhaul or a complete break. Right now.

Transiting Saturn is squaring your Moon/Venus opposition so you have to get all your resolve together to get through this since you're being very hard hit right now. It's also squaring composite Sun.

All this crazy stuff you're feeling, I don't think he's personally going through it the same as his chart is not being hit like yours.

It's not a time to sit & let the storm pass. It's in a cardinal sign so you're called to action. The more you run for cover the more painful it's going to be. Sorry but it's true. Gather the courage and confront. Pluto in Capricorn says you have to build a new relationship (Venus) structure that works for YOU. Conjunct the composite Sun it's do-or-die. Opposed your Moon means emotionally it's gonna hurt and bring up a lot of old wounds. Transiting Saturn square the Moon Venus opposition feels like you don't have the energy/will to make it happen, kinda like having the air kicked out of you, and being solemn.

I'd say don't sit and feel sorry for yourself, make a conscious effort to initiate some changes, little bits at first to get comfy with it, just to release some pent up Saturn energy. Depression is horrid if you don't punch it in the face and tell it that you're going to get on with your life anyway. ((Hugs))

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jacque
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posted March 12, 2010 01:29 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
...

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jacque
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posted March 12, 2010 01:34 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
..

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jacque
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posted March 12, 2010 01:34 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
...

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Lonake
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posted March 12, 2010 01:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
what does it mean when you say that you 2 r really unsupported with this relationship? I did not understand the above statement. Please explain. Thanks.

It means there's not enough balance. When it tilts too far in one direction the end result is what you're feeling.

quote:
If there is a complete break will it affect him or will I be the only one who is affected?

It will affect both since t.Pluto is conj composite Sun. I think what you're reeling from is reflected in the transits. His don't match. But I can't see his progressed chart, either. It could be showing the same as your natal.

quote:
what did u mean by the above statement. confront what? my fears?

Yes.

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jacque
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posted March 12, 2010 01:49 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
...

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jacque
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posted March 12, 2010 01:51 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
when you say complete break or complete overhaul, do you mean from my side or his side?

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Lonake
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posted March 12, 2010 02:07 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message
I would think it would be initiated by you, and it would have a profound impact on the relationship.

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Lonake
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posted March 12, 2010 02:25 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message
He's going through progressed Sun conj Neptune; it's mostly you. Neptune doesn't want to see reality. Pluto/Saturn can't hide from it no matter how hard they try. The Pluto saturn square isn't hitting his chart. The big deal for him for a while now has been nNeptune conj pSun.

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jacque
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posted March 12, 2010 02:46 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
Thank you so much for your help, Lonake. I'm desperately looking for answers so I really really appreciate this.

->"He's going through progressed Sun conj Neptune; it's mostly you.

what does this mean? what's he going thro'? Sorry if I'm being dense. I'm still very new to all this.

->"Neptune doesn't want to see reality. Pluto/Saturn can't hide from it no matter how hard they try. The Pluto saturn square isn't hitting his chart. The big deal for him for a while now has been nNeptune conj pSun."

He's in a relationship with someone else, which is killing me. I know he's in love with me but he's just choosing the more practical, dazzling option & expecting me to just accept it & continue being friends leading our own separate lives. So what you're seeing above, is it me or the other person?

And what is the reality that he's not seeing?

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Lonake
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posted March 12, 2010 03:10 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
Thank you so much for your help, Lonake. I'm desperately looking for answers so I really really appreciate this.

Np

quote:
what does this mean? what's he going thro'? Sorry if I'm being dense. I'm still very new to all this.

Ohmygosh what an astro blunder lol. OK Neptune is about the dream, the pretty pink clouds, and wanting to get away from everything that is real and smacks of anything hard,harsh, or ugly. It rules drugs and dreams so that should tell you enough. A Neptune conj Sun in any way shape form is its own kind of monster. It can feel heavenly and be a time of great spiritual growth/development, all the way to feeling like your unconscious mind has grabbed conscious hold of you and won't let go (dark side of drugs). So he's been living in a world where it's hard to say what exactly it's made of, all we know is that it's not reality as we commoners know it. It's elevated to something higher, whether it's supportive or not as we see from our vantage point it doesnt matter, to the Neptune conj Sun person, this is IT, and it's most likely better than they could have imagined. It can be a weird time, though, it's one of those where you have to watch yourself or you'll go off and join a cult

quote:
expecting me to just accept it & continue being friends leading our own separate lives. So what you're seeing above, is it me or the other person?

Well he's got Sun conj Uranus conj Venus in the first, trine Moon (his wife) and sextile Saturn (permanence). Does he want a complete break, or does he want an open relationship with you? I can see both in his natal.

quote:
And what is the reality that he's not seeing?

Look above, where I mention Neptune.

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jacque
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posted March 12, 2010 04:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
...

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jacque
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posted March 12, 2010 10:22 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
..

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changchiu
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posted March 12, 2010 03:38 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for changchiu     Edit/Delete Message
you are aqua and she is scorpio
Am I wrong?You may feel her passion also..
I have similar story and he is aqua men like intense feelings...hýmmm.

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GrlyGirl20
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posted March 12, 2010 09:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for GrlyGirl20     Edit/Delete Message
Jaque...I'm not sure the logistics of your and his chart. But I do have first hand experience with Pluto stuff going on in a relationship. I had been dating an Aqua for three months, and we moved very very quickly and attached very quickly. In my case with the Aqua it just got bad quickly, and even though he and I have been done officially for two months...we still see each other twice a week as we have a class. And we we would entertain the idea of getting back together as soon as like three weeks ago. So its been a ride with us. This is actually the longest amount of time (since we met in Oct) that we've ever gone with not talking. And while I don't think he's with anyone I don't know for sure. But there is deff that feeling of I don't want to let go. Even though I KNOW I should. And yes I also have the feeling that I am TERRIFIED of him being with someone else...it would literally crush my heart. I do know he's an Aqua though...so the chance of it happening soon are quite likely.

We have a few Pluto aspects (all under a 4 degree orb). We also have some Saturn gunk as well which also makes it very very hard to let the person go.

But here are our placements in terms of Pluto: (I just included the one's to inner planets as the main one's)

His Pluto Trine My Sun (I also have all these placements natally)
His Pluto Square my Mer
His Pluto Trine my Mars
His Pluto Trine my Asc
His Pluto Square my Jupiter
His Pltuo Inconjunct my Chiron
His Pluto Semi square my Par Fortune
His Pluto Trine my Ceres
His Pluto Conjunct my Pholus
His Pluto Square my Orcus
His Pluto Conjunct my Sedna

My Pluto Trine his Sun
My Pluto Sesquisquare his Mer
My Pluto Quintile his Venus
My Pluto Opp his Mars
My Pluto Conjunt his MC
My Pluto Biquintile his Jupiter
My Pluto Semisquare his Saturn
My Pluto Sextile his Neptune
My Pluto Conjunct his Pluto
My Pluto Sesquisquare his Chiron
My Pluto Sesquisquare his Juno

Along with the biggie my Saturn square his Sun, and sextile his moon...it sucks. Seeing this guy is LITERALLY like torture. And it just sucks. Sooo I totally know how you feel Jacque about what to do with Pluto aspects. But I myself have some heavy duty pluto aspects (sun, moon and mercury placements) so the obsession is NOTHING for me lol.

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jacque
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posted March 13, 2010 11:15 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
I have Mars in Aquarius trine Pluto in Libra & Sun in Aquaris trine Pluto in Libra in my natal chart.

It seems unfair that the Pluto person has such a hold over us .. doesn't it?

but does it go both ways? Do we also have a hold over the Pluto person too?

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Lara
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posted March 13, 2010 11:22 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lara     Edit/Delete Message
Does pluto only kick in when you are intimate with somebody as i have really saucy pluto aspects with a friend and it's heaven not hell

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jacque
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posted March 13, 2010 11:25 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jacque     Edit/Delete Message
hey Lonake,

where did you go? still awaiting your posts.

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ekf
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posted March 13, 2010 01:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for ekf     Edit/Delete Message
i have a lot of pluto links with a "friend" of mine
me to him:
pluto sq sun
pluto trine venus
pluto opp mars
pluto sext nept
pluto trine nn
pluto opp valentine
sun opp pluto
karma opp pluto
valentine conj pluto

I don't know about the who has control thing. I certainly don't feel like it's me.

We can't seem to move forward, yet we can't seem to break away. We've tried to stop seeing each other 3 times already and it hasn't worked yet.

I told him to stop contacting me yesterday and yet I still don't believe this ends here.

I've never had this with anyone else - and I've never had this many pluto contacts with someone else. So it's definitely some kind of weird, funky glue.

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Ami Ann
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posted March 13, 2010 01:38 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Ann     Edit/Delete Message
Weird ,funky glue LOL. Ami

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Lara
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posted March 13, 2010 01:46 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lara     Edit/Delete Message
ekf,

WOW those are a lot of pluto aspects!

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ekf
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posted March 13, 2010 02:08 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for ekf     Edit/Delete Message
tell me about it! can feel everyone of them.

never had anything quite so obsessive.

yesterday i tried to do a clean break and probably threw out 100 pages of astrological synastry analysis. Craziness.

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