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Author
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Topic: Rocky Relationship with Parent(s)? Post Your Synastry Here!
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crabbypatty
Knowflake Posts: 265
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 18, 2010 08:51 PM
 
 What the heck, speculative or not, I did it. Above is the synastry between my mother and me.  And that's the composite. IP: Logged |
StarrofVenusGirl
Knowflake Posts: 706
From: Down the Rabbit Hole
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 18, 2010 08:55 PM
Crabby I'd be interested in seeing what's going on with the planets even if the houses aren't right so go ahead.Belgz--Whoa! You guys are slamming each other's 12th houses, even in the composite Mars is in the 12th and I always had bad luck with that placement. Her Moon-Jupiter conjunction squaring your Sun-Mercury is even worse because Mercury is your chart ruler. That totally negates the otherwise beneficial placement of her ASC near your Sun, I would think. And all of those squares to the 12th house...that's pretty bad. Your Saturns seem to be in pretty good shape in synastry but your mom has hers retrograde in the 8th house. The composite is another story though, that Mars-Jupiter opposition can't be pleasant and I see that once again Mercury seems to be indicative of major conflict as yours is also under the weight of a nasty opposition, with Saturn. So far in all of the composites there's an affliction in the 4th or 5th house. Absinthe--Is that your mom's Saturn on your ASC? IP: Logged |
StarrofVenusGirl
Knowflake Posts: 706
From: Down the Rabbit Hole
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 18, 2010 09:11 PM
Crabby, you and your mom are like me and my mom, you are squaring each others stelliums. You also have a Moon/Jupiter conjunction being hit by a nasty square like Lechien. If the house placements are right your 8th house stellium is hitting your mom's 4th and 5th. Her Saturn is also square your Sun and your Saturns are square each others.Sun/Saturn hard aspects aren't that bad, but I've heard the square is the worst and usually comes about as the Saturn person doing a lot of criticizing of the Sun and damaging their self-esteem. Is that her Sun falling in your 12th house? IP: Logged |
AbsintheDragonfly
Moderator Posts: 927
From: Gaia
Registered: Apr 2010
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posted July 18, 2010 09:22 PM
quote:
Absinthe--Is that your mom's Saturn on your ASC?
Yes. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
Knowflake Posts: 2269
From: US
Registered: Dec 2009
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posted July 18, 2010 09:34 PM
(((Absinthe))) 
((Belgz))) Ami
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I am two with nature. Eighth House Stellium IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
Knowflake Posts: 2269
From: US
Registered: Dec 2009
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posted July 18, 2010 09:44 PM
I wanted to write at the end of the day cuz I appreciate all that you shared on this thread.
I am not alone with my crazy background.
I feel alone--most of the time--but I am not.
You guys went through the same thing.
The human being was not meant for this betrayal.
It hurts terribly.
I feel glad I am not alone and will sleep on that tonight.
x o Ami
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I am two with nature. Eighth House Stellium IP: Logged |
StarrofVenusGirl
Knowflake Posts: 706
From: Down the Rabbit Hole
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 18, 2010 09:51 PM
Thanks Ami. I consider myself to be a fairly healthy person despite everything I've been through, I like to think it's because I'm trying to "evolve", but there is still baggage there. What these lessons are to learn I don't know but I do envy those who have wonderful relationships with their parents. I am hoping to change the paradigm by having a great relationship with my son for the rest of our lives  IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 830
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 18, 2010 10:38 PM
See if you can identify the dynamics between both parents and I. I'm working on the issues now (thanks to my chakra-balancing!) but we used to be enemies.Dad:  Mom:  IP: Logged |
belgz
Knowflake Posts: 1878
From: Planet love :)
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 18, 2010 10:47 PM
You know what I noticed?
Saturn in hard aspect to North node.
A Turkish astrologer said this was the worst time to conceive and it seems almost all of us were conceived around that time of north node and saturn transits or born around that time. IP: Logged |
scrappydog
Knowflake Posts: 359
From: Texas
Registered: May 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 01:32 AM
interesting! My sis and I both have moon square saturn and my mother and I are both bipolar, though she's more of the depressed, dour type nad I'm more of the wild, manic type. She really get's me down and emotionally and physically abused me and my sis. Though my sis is not bi polar there are definate mental problems goin on with her, she is more in denial, every screwed up thing she does is all someone elses fault while she's perfect and innocent. I would say she is more of a narrcicistic, slightly sociopathic personality than anything else. She has prominent leo and gemini, while me and moom have prominent libra and capricornIP: Logged |
scrappydog
Knowflake Posts: 359
From: Texas
Registered: May 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 01:59 AM
Ok checked out mom and my synastry. We had Major power struggles and fights for dominance during earlier years, she always saw me as wild and unconventional and innapropriate, even crazy. Her attempts to control me always backfired on her and made me hate her with a passion. She tried to use very orthadox, contrictive religious brainwashing on me for over 15 years before she finally gave up. Mom is a religious zealot and completely delusional, she thinks I am damned to hell for anything and everything, even practicing astrolgy. Everything she does not understand is from "the devil." Being as enlightened and free a spirit as I am, this made my childhood literally a living hell.
She has an extremely tight sun, neptune, saturn conj in her 9th house of religion and moral values(she has a twin sister who is a religious zealot also, they try to indocterinate other people to their own delusional sickness), this conj of her tightly conj my sun pluto conj. My will i so strong she could never dominate me even as a child and this enraged her into terrorizing abuse. We also have moon square mars and mars square saturn. Her aturn is square my moon, repeating the natal moon square saturn that my sistr and I both have in our own charts. Also we have uranus square sun and she claims I am the most rebellious person she has ever know. All in all I think is that all my plutonian and saturnine energy makes me stronger than her and she can not bend me to her will, so in turn, she hates while I resent her.IP: Logged |
Cynnared
Knowflake Posts: 524
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 02:23 AM
My mom and I have a double whammy of NEGATIVE Saturn/Pluto aspects and one of them includes her Sun. We have moon square moon. Her Jupiter Conjs my sun but her neppy opposes my sun. Her venus is opposite mine.I'm not sure about my dad..he has never been around in my life. I don't know who he is as a person and never will. Though I do call him every 2 weeks or so but he is a stranger to me. Cynn IP: Logged |
crabbypatty
Knowflake Posts: 265
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 07:02 AM
Quote: Crabby, you and your mom are like me and my mom, you are squaring each others stelliums. You also have a Moon/Jupiter conjunction being hit by a nasty square like Lechien. If the house placements are right your 8th house stellium is hitting your mom's 4th and 5th. Her Saturn is also square your Sun and your Saturns are square each others.Sun/Saturn hard aspects aren't that bad, but I've heard the square is the worst and usually comes about as the Saturn person doing a lot of criticizing of the Sun and damaging their self-esteem. Is that her Sun falling in your 12th house? (Close quote) Yes, SVG, it's her Sun in my 12th. And something tells me I have guessed pretty well re: her Ascendant. During my childhood (but even a bit now, despite her efforts at being kinder since my father passed away), she criticized me a great deal (nowadays, it's occasional comments about my increasing weight and my child-rearing skills). I never felt emotionally safe with her, couldn't confide in her, because inevitably she'd use the info against me later. She never respected my privacy and would look through my diary, school books, drawers, etcetera, for ammunition and then report things to my father, which got me in a load of trouble. Also, she had terrible fits of rage against me and often would hurl whatever object was available at me (shoes, hangers, you name it). Then again, she has anger management issues with everyone in her life and has thrown a set of brass candle holders at her own sister. All told, it wasn't pleasant. Like I said, she has been trying to make amends, although she claims to not remember any of the abuse. I'm sure at least some of my self esteem issues were made worse by her. IP: Logged |
StarrofVenusGirl
Knowflake Posts: 706
From: Down the Rabbit Hole
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 07:19 AM
Crabby,My mom used to (and still does) invade my privacy too. Read my diary, come in my room when I wasn't there and change things around or worse throw things away, listen to my phone conversations...it drives me crazy just thinking about it. I recently gave her a key to my home, very reluctantly, but she convinced me she should have one for emergencies. She came over without asking and "cleaned" my house and I couldn't find anything in the kitchen for days. I was not amused. I'm not even a super private person but she has brought that out in me and now I can't stand to feel like my privacy is invaded, it's a deep trauma from childhood. Belgz--that's an interesting theory about Saturn in hard aspect to NN, I am actually one of the rare people who knows their exact conception date so I will erect a chart for that day and see what was going on. Meta--Here goes nothing! Well I'd say of the two you may have gotten along slightly better with Dad but both relationships were difficult? Your father wasn't at all expressive and very closed to you emotionally and you felt like you were always trying to earn his love, whereas with your Mom there were a lot of power struggles and expectations, perhaps you felt like she was pushing you, invading your essence and not letting you be who you are? IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
Knowflake Posts: 2269
From: US
Registered: Dec 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 07:34 AM
Meta
Ami
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I am two with nature. Eighth House Stellium IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
Knowflake Posts: 2269
From: US
Registered: Dec 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 08:02 AM
I think that if we can mine the synastry with our parents we can get the road map out.
I have been trying to figure out WHAT the heck happened to me for my entire life.
I tried everything to make sense of it.
I could never see it until Astrology.
It is there in black and white--symbols--if you can read them.
So far, I have 3 aspects which tell my story.
I will find more as my knowledge of Astrology grows.
Both my parents Pluto's are conjunct my Mars in Cancer(exact)
They raped my Mars until it was powerless.
My mother's Neptune is in an exact conjunction with my Pluto. She told my Pluto(id, instincts) that it was NOT seeing what it was.
Her Sun is in exact conjunction to my Chiron. She wanted me to heal her wounds.
She wanted me to be perfect enough so she could shine.
Electric mind, so graciously did my chart.She showed me that I want to belong to a tribe so badly that I gave up my Scorpio/Pluto /Mars power.
Gemini Venus in the 7th house wants to find harmony and grace in relationships.
When people overpower it---it will usually give in --to it's own detriment.
I have Sun,moon, Mercury in the 8th house. That will make finding your identity delayed--or maybe never.
Hence, the two cow in the pasture analogy 
Ami ------------------
I am two with nature. Eighth House Stellium IP: Logged |
belgz
Knowflake Posts: 1878
From: Planet love :)
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 08:27 AM
Sorry to hear about everyones stories... 
Ami,
Chiron to Mars and Venus contacts happen with everyone. Im sure you would have them with your children too either with either mars or venus or both. I am unsure of what that aspect means but it happens with families almost all the time. Chiron links up almost exactly with personal planets .. and Venus and mars. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
Knowflake Posts: 2269
From: US
Registered: Dec 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 08:33 AM
Yes, Belgz.
My son had his Chiron on my Mercury.
I think Chiron is very meaningful.
However, in my experience and from what I have read--it can be a good or a bad thing.
Sometimes, the person's planet can hurt you badly.
Sometimes, it comes for nurture and healing.
What has been your experience with Chiron, Belgz? Ami IP: Logged |
lechien
Knowflake Posts: 391
From: i live in a kitchen
Registered: May 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 08:37 AM
we all share similar stories here, fellow survivors! i know it will never be erased completely from us, but we can all evolve.for me the biggest break was when my mother said she disowns me. probably for her, it came from the perspective that this should "punish" me or something, but i felt a BIG release. of course it wasn't the solution i wished for, but i'm free now, and i don't have to care about anything anymore. she said to my aunt i have been nothing but a pain and i ruined her life, lol! i'm from a super small family and i only have contact to my aunt, but i've never been a family person anyway so i feel free to have no family! IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 830
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 09:58 AM
StarrofVenus,Very insightful! Dad was absent. Divorce left me in my mother's custody. Once I hit teenage years and started to express my individuality, father and mother did everything in their power to suppress me. I dealt with it by cutting father out completely, but couldn't quite do so entirely with mother, as I lived with her. Both had drinking problems, and mother and I endured more than a few physical quarrels and a thousand verbal battles. She doesn't remember them now, as she was intoxicated, but I certainly do. Mother and father had me at a young age, both completely immature and irresponsible. I was sexually abused by one of mother's boyfriend's sons. When I revealed this information to her five years later, at age 13, she told me to prove it. I made the mistake of telling her when she was intoxicated. I was also attacked by my drunken stepfather when I was 16, when I got into an argument with them. He held me against a wall and strangled me. It was terrible, and traumatic, and after it happened I moved out and had no home for a while. Moved from place to place, determined not to go back. I told them I would never see them again as long as alcohol was in that house. And when they called me after a while and agreed to quit, I came back. And they haven't had a sip since. And though it's sad that it took me experiencing something like that to make them stop, i'd rather have been through that than have them still on the juice. Not trying to tell my sob story, but I used to be very private with this information. I thought it was no one's damn business. But I think that harboring experiences from the light gives them power. I'd rather treat them as intellectual facts that I have overcome. If I hadn't gone through what I have then I wouldn't be me. And I love me! IP: Logged |
belgz
Knowflake Posts: 1878
From: Planet love :)
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 10:07 AM
Ami,
No sure how it works but according to Magi Astrology my Chiron on my mums venus is meant to be a great aspect and so is her Chiron trine my sun and mercury.
When my mum isn't having a mood swing shes tolerable but she is extremely moody and up and down. When I get along with her I actually like her but I don't stick around longer than twenty minutes because it can quickly somehow turn into an arguement. Ferdi Has chiron trine my ascendant. He healed me I guess in a weird way or maybe I should say guided me. My chiron is also exacly trine his mars. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
Knowflake Posts: 2269
From: US
Registered: Dec 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 10:13 AM
Yes, Belgz, Chiron is powerful but hard to grasp in a simple way.
Ami
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I am two with nature. Eighth House Stellium IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
Knowflake Posts: 2269
From: US
Registered: Dec 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 10:17 AM
Thank you for sharing that ,Meta.
I don't feel as unique and wounded as I did before this thread.
I put myself in to a "different" box cuz of my childhood experiences.
I have more hope of overcoming after reading everyone's posts.
Ami
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I am two with nature. Eighth House Stellium IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 830
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 11:09 PM
Ami,If you feel different in any way, shape or form, than this thread has been a success. I hope anything that promotes personal, spiritual growth comes to you. IP: Logged |
popcorn
Knowflake Posts: 1202
From:
Registered: Aug 2009
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posted July 19, 2010 11:24 PM
Me and my mother have first being friends my last 2 year but it took 35 year. Sometimes I could not understand why we quarrel and make difficulties because I think our synastry chart looks good. We have so many trines between us. Hers chart and my chart looks best if I compare with my sisters and hers chart. My mother and I could not meet each other and in a period of 15 year we not talk to each other at all.The only in our chart that I believe could trigg everything between her and me must be hers sun square my N merk/uran/pluto stellium. Her sun trine my Sun and AC and normaly that should stable the neg but not in this case.. IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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