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Author
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Topic: How are synastry aspects felt between two people?
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GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 222
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 19, 2010 11:38 PM
 
I have a new recent crush and we have supposedly flowing romantic aspects…such as Sun Conjunct Moon with an orb of 1 degree, plus Venus Conjunct Jupiter (also with an orb of 1 degree) plus other aspects. Anyway my question is I feel VERY strongly for him, and am drawn to him (for instance even before I liked him...I LOVED being around him, and loved talking to him). He was initially my tutor, however he ventured the convo into more personal stuff (ie relationships...however if you ask him he'd say I started talking about them first lol).Anyway he doesn’t seem to be affected by me at all, even as a friend. He doesn’t initiate anything nor even seems to be receptive to us being friends. I know at the very least there is an affinity between us, and he thinks I'm an ok person. However would he still feel the aspects felt between us (this is the Cap I’ve written about, we have hung out together and he’ll tell me to visit him, however its just I am quite drawn towards him and usually when aspects are this close people tend to at the very least be friends) or be open to friendship. Synastry books say that those aspects are felt strongly between people, however it seems that I don’t affect him (again even in terms of just talking). He is VERY hard to read, but still…I guess I’m just wondering when you have aspects (for better or worse) are they usually felt by both people. Or is only one person affected? Thanks.
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MyVirgoMask
Knowflake Posts: 2928
From: Bay Area, CA
Registered: May 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 12:01 AM
I'm pretty sure there's no guarantee that you HAVE to like someone just because there are XYZ aspects. There's no real formula here. One person will be receptive while another won't and that's just feelings/emotions which are not going to be like controlled by astrology aspects.And for the record, I've always disliked Moon/Sun conjunctions for myself romantically, either way. It's also kind of overrated imo IP: Logged |
Lioness
Knowflake Posts: 693
From:
Registered: Mar 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 12:41 AM
I understand exactly what ur saying.. He does feel it, maybe not as much.. But he does feel it... I had the same question about a guy 11 months ago, and he's just now admitting we have a bond.. I felt all this time, I was going crazy, thinking how he could not feel the pull, connection.... But well I know he does now.. Maybe not in the same way.. But he feels it.. IP: Logged |
featherlightly
Knowflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 01:16 AM
Take a look at what houses your planets fall into in his chart, and vice versa. Even if you have great synastry aspects, if you're only hitting his platonic houses (2nd, 3rd, 6th, 10th, 11th, etc.) he might not view you the same way you view him, if his planets are in your 1st, 4th, 5th, 7th, or 8th.Also, a sun/moon and Venus/Jupiter conjunction is often great -- however -- whether a conjunction feels good or not to someone depends on how the planets involved are aspected in their own chart. If your sun is sitting on his moon but his moon is square his natal Pluto and Mars, for instance, the conjunction might not feel good to him because it's triggering those challenging aspects. If you post the charts, it may be easier to see what's going on.  I've also noticed that people with a lot of planets in the 12th or 8th house can be hard to read. If that's the case with him, maybe he just has a great pokerface.  IP: Logged |
featherlightly
Knowflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 01:20 AM
quote:
And for the record, I've always disliked Moon/Sun conjunctions for myself romantically, either way. It's also kind of overrated imo
Ditto. I've never been a big fan, especially when a man's sun is on my moon -- but then again my moon is tortured (at the apex of a T-square with Pluto and my sun/Mercury). IP: Logged |
MyVirgoMask
Knowflake Posts: 2928
From: Bay Area, CA
Registered: May 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 01:40 AM
Heh, yeah...my moon is tortured too! Just a 12th house Moon/Uranus opposition and conjunct Chiron. Stuff on my moon generally makes me totally bonkers (not in a good way). At any rate, GrlyGirl, it's probably wise to study the person's chart first and see what might set them off (for better or worse!)....sensitive points like T-squares also can work like magic, making someone totally into you, or running the other way lol IP: Logged |
GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 222
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 02:02 AM
quote:
I've also noticed that people with a lot of planets in the 12th or 8th house can be hard to read. If that's the case with him, maybe he just has a great pokerface
Actually he has an AMAZING pokerface lol...he IS a Scorp Rising...so literally getting ANYTHING out of him, even annoyance is VERY VERY hard. I do agree that it does help with the aspects that one makes to their own natal chart. I never looked at it that way...I suppose it could be thought of as my Moon in Cap is Conjunct his Sun in Cap, but my Moon is also Square (my) Pluto, Opp Mars, and Trine my Venus (PLUS I'm a Cancer Sun/Mars/Asc)...so anything on my Moon tends to make me feel LOTS of passion. As far as it goes with him, I'll say I feel a more physical reaction than emotional lol....so its deff NO WHERE what I felt for the Aqua, but it's semi strong attraction. quote:
Take a look at what houses your planets fall into in his chart, and vice versa. Even if you have great synastry aspects, if you're only hitting his platonic houses (2nd, 3rd, 6th, 10th, 11th, etc.) he might not view you the same way you view him, if his planets are in your 1st, 4th, 5th, 7th, or 8th
I agree with this quote, his planets fall in mixed houses with me. They fall in the 6th, 7th, 8th, 11th, and 10th. Now my houses (based on when he said he was born) fall in his 7th, 8th, 9th, and 3rd. I can feel that something is there...but I can't put my finger on it. Like when I very first met him, I wouldn't even say romantic attraction it was something. I orginally thought he as into me (again he talked about relatioships SOOOO much...and dating, and telling me who hit on him, read my previous post to get a feel for what he did) but he knew about my ex (the infamous Aqua ex, and how heartbroken I was). I tend to ignore my Cancer intuition and go the Cap route (and ignore gut feelings) however I just feel that something is there...maybe not romantic feelings but at the very least fondness in a friendship route. IP: Logged |
GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 222
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 02:07 AM
Here is the post I orginally wrote about him
http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum24/HTML/205260.html His Info:
Dob Jan 13, 1989...born in Charlotte, NC at 2:27 am Me:
DOB July 3, 1985...born in Bellflower, CA at 5:34 am IP: Logged |
DD
Knowflake Posts: 6531
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 06:13 AM
Can you post both natal charts?IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Knowflake Posts: 1753
From: Orbiting
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 07:25 AM
HI Girly
I am gonna look ,later.
When reading your posts, I "thought" Pisces. I will check and see if there is Pisces, strong Neptune or 12th house lol I am still on msn if you ever want to talk.
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Pluto conjunct Dejanira, Girlfriend. IP: Logged |
GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 222
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 12:42 PM
quote:
I understand exactly what ur saying.. He does feel it, maybe not as much.. But he does feel it...
I had the same question about a guy 11 months ago, and he's just now admitting we have a bond.. I felt all this time, I was going crazy, thinking how he could not feel the pull, connection.... But well I know he does now.. Maybe not in the same way.. But he feels it..
Oh I hope so...he is just SOOO hard to read. I've gotten a smile or two out of him when I see him. Even at bars when we see each other we make eye contact more than once...so I don't know if anything is there. I hope so though. IP: Logged |
Betty Boop
Knowflake Posts: 174
From: Betty Boop Land
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 01:00 PM
Is it possible that you are not all that emotionally demonstrative around him?One of the things Sun/Moon means is that he would sympathise with/be understanding of - your emotions. Maybe you're not close enough yet to share such deep life stories, so as to *feel* the similarities between you and the mutual support. The way in which an aspect plays out is altered depending on the sign/houses also.
Standard interpretations don't mention this.
I mean - sure! A Sun/Moon conjunction is great - but it plays out differently when it is in Capricorn than it does when it is in Libra or Aquarius etc. Capricorn generally is slow to open up and trust.
Things can progress slowly in time. IP: Logged |
GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 222
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 01:43 PM
Actually I’m not emotionally demonstrative at all around him...I told him I liked him…in a text (I told him I would rather go to semi- formal with him than his friend…he didn’t reply). Then I saw him like a week later, and he saw me (he turned and said hi to me, but it was awkward…he was with his friend, and they were looking at me). After that I just went cold and started to ignore him. And have been ignoring him off and on since then. I’ve seen him in bars and we’ll make eye contact and I won’t say anything and neither does he. He mentioned to his friend that I like him, but he didn’t give an opinion either way. I just think that he’s more disinterested in me than I’m willing to realize. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Knowflake Posts: 1753
From: Orbiting
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 01:47 PM
I have some ideas for you but I don't want to say them on the open board.
Can I write to you on msn. I still have you as a friend?
Do you ever go on?IP: Logged |
DD
Knowflake Posts: 6531
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 01:49 PM
Well, from what you tell, he probably thinks you`re disinterested too. Ignoring someone is not really the best way to show them you like them.
But I can understand that, I am unfortunately the same way. lolIP: Logged |
GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 222
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 02:14 PM
Hi Ami hun...I don't go on that often at all...but you can text me on yahoo...it goes to my cell phone, or you can email me. I tend to check my email excessively lol. I'm at the point where I trust you and can give you either my personal or school email...which ever is easiest for you. And yes I do know it would seem that I'm not into him...but for some reason I have NO problem being affectionate and loving and flirty with guys I don't like romantically/everyone (so much to the point they think I am into them), but when I feel something for someone its like an awkward switch goes off, and I can't deal with them or how I feel. I try to...but its just I become really cold and aloof...and show I don't like them. I know acting the opposite of how I feel is bad, but I just do it...I don't understand myself...even though I am a Cancer and emotions are supposed to be my forte...I feel emotions in a grand scale for everyone. I care about everyone and everything...and am friendly and open, and emotional about mistreatment or anything going on in the world. Children, human rights, volunteering...I love all of that stuff...and each person I meet...but feeling intensly for one person takes a lot out of me and is very very hard. Plus it happens so rarely that I actually am into one person...but when it does I feel very intensely for them. I can't be that way when I'm really individually into someone. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Knowflake Posts: 1753
From: Orbiting
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 02:19 PM
I don't have you on Yahoo. Here is my e mail. Write me and give me yours
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Pluto conjunct Dejanira, Girlfriend.
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GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 222
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 02:28 PM
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Nine
Knowflake Posts: 601
From: The Cusp of Love
Registered: May 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 02:51 PM
So, he is/was your tutor. You talk about personal stuff. You've hung out together, and he invites you to visit him. IMO, the aspects are working perfectly, otherwise you wouldn't have spent so much alone time together. The issue may be in understanding the aspects. Perhaps, your expectations of Sun/Moon are too high. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Knowflake Posts: 1753
From: Orbiting
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 02:57 PM
Got it
I will write .------------------
Pluto conjunct Dejanira, Girlfriend. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Knowflake Posts: 1753
From: Orbiting
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 03:15 PM
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GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 222
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 03:26 PM
quote:
So, he is/was your tutor. You talk about personal stuff. You've hung out together, and he invites you to visit him. IMO, the aspects are working perfectly, otherwise you wouldn't have spent so much alone time together.
Mmmm I never thought of it that way...I just immedietly jumped on the negative haha. Yeah, he was my tutor, and he shifted the convo to personal stuff (actually very soon into the tutoring sessions begun). I have no problem telling him things, I feel really comfy around him. And yeah he has asked me when am I going to the bars, or he'll say I never go downtown. Or if I did go why didn't I say hi, etc. I've invited him to a party and he was gonna go, but I got dressed late and as a result left really late...so he didn't go. I guess its just me wanting to spend a little more time with him. I guess I love being around him and talking to him, not even just romantically...he's a pretty cool guy. But I would have guessed that he doesn't seem to like talking to me as much as I like him...but then again he opended up about stuff...who knows lol. I know he knows I'm into him, its just a hard read on him. Even his friend told me he knows that I'm into him, but he didn't offer an opinion either way. And he has no idea whats going on in his life (typical scorp rising lol). IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Knowflake Posts: 1753
From: Orbiting
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 03:30 PM
I just sent you an e mail. ------------------
Pluto conjunct Dejanira, Girlfriend. IP: Logged |
GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 222
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 20, 2010 06:52 PM
I got your email...I got an email from you Ami...Anyway I'm kinda feeling bummed, my mom knows I'm into him, and I was telling her about it, and she basically was telling me that he doesn't even talk to me...so why am I making myself look like a pathetic person. I just kinda felt the need to vent and express how hurt I am...but she is right. Again even his friend said that if he isn't doing anything there is not much else I can do. Blah I just needed to get that out lol. Thanks!! IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Knowflake Posts: 1753
From: Orbiting
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 20, 2010 07:08 PM
We,all, have been at a place where we are interested in someone and they don't seem to respond.
It is hard. There are no two ways about it.
I am sorry you are going through this  ------------------
Pluto conjunct Dejanira, Girlfriend. IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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