posted November 03, 2010 03:52 AM         

"any time you could not figure out WHAT was happening right in front of your eyes."

progressed Sun square natal Neptune.
This was rough for me esp because my natal Neptune only receives easy aspects, nothing harsh. I have no addictions, only Plutonian obsessions hehe. Seriously though, I didn't see this one til late in the game.

posted November 03, 2010 04:30 AM         

It is so strange that somehow my deepest prayers have been answered and the fog is lifting.
The main person I can SEE is myself. Once, I can see and feel myself, I can figure out WHAT is going on.

posted November 03, 2010 05:13 AM         

quote:

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Neptune in the 2nd could hinder self worth. Could.
Neptune makes it foggy, difficult to see what's real, you're easily taken advantage of here because you want to just see the best bits. In a really creepy chart it shows where you take advantage of others.

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Ugh. I've been on the lookout for red flags since I was a little - especially with men - but I do want to see the best in others. I always thought that if you could focus on that, let them know in some way, that you saw those good things, and the strengths in those good things - then they might feel them and express them more (if they didn't do it often - or just being nice to someone, despite their nasty treatment towards me; that actually ended up helping me at times, because I truly didn't want to be nasty). In myself, my self worth hasn't always been low - I had enough to get myself out of situations that were bad for me, but at the same time, the situations had affected me enough to mess me up, if you know what I mean. Feeling confident until I was in a social situation, and then losing my personality once I was there - a failure of confidence. The only thing that helped at first, was having something outside of myself to focus on, like a stray dog, and finding its owner.

Ami, sorry you couldn't get back to sleep.

posted November 03, 2010 09:37 AM         

I can relate your words very well to his situation.

Marked as the black sheep of the family, it seems he's only driven to show his mom(dad?) he can do it better than his perfect brother.
He just fights to get their attention, to be the perfect son but he doesn't (want to) see he's NOT like them and never will be.
He prefers to stay living in his dreams.
His mom as an authority must be obeyed and he still feels she deserves it because she was right in everything she warned him about.
She warned him even about me because she saw I could FEEL and SEE and I scared the hell out of her with that - it's the only thing I can lay my finger on regarding her antipathy against me.
I'm convinced his messed-up past/present (he's still in mental hosp.) has a LOT to do with ... his mom.
I don't know when he will ever SEE/FEEL the things/reality clear, ... I really don't know.. sometimes for a moment it seems he's able to see, but mostly there are the addictions to escape reality..

"Live YouR LovE with Her but Not UndeR my ROoF!"
mom

I will list some.. later.

So, later..

HE - ME

Ascendant conjunct Sun (1,5*)
Sun trine Moon (0,5*)
Venus conjunct Mars (1*)
Moon sextile Venus (1*)
Descendant conjunct Vertex (1,5*)
IC conjunct Uranus (2*)
Pluto conjunct Uranus (0,5)
Moon conjunct MC (3*)
Uranus square Sun (0,5*)
NN square NN (0*)
NN conjunct Moon (2*)
Venus conjunct NN (6*)
Saturn conjunct Venus (3*)
Saturn trine Jupiter (0*)
Saturn sextile Pluto (1*)
Moon trine Pluto (1*)
Merc. inconjunct Pluto (0*)
Mars square Pluto (1,5)
Moon opp. Jupiter/Nept. (2/1,5)
Descendant trine Saturn (1*)

posted November 07, 2010 11:33 AM         

I just talked to my father. No wonder, I could not see straight.
My family life was a patchwork of lies upon lies.
As a child, you KNOW what is going on. You KNOW lies when you see them but as an adult you buy the lies, too.
Then,one day,you see that you can't live with the lies ,anymore, cuz they are destroying you.
Then,you start digging out like digging to China with a spoon

posted November 07, 2010 03:20 PM         

*I* feel guilty when *I* get angry, even if it is LEGITIMATE anger.
A Cancer Mars must be the worst Mars to have as far as being able to express anger ,directly.
Well, a Cancer Mars in the 12th house would be the worst lol

Why can't I just be angry and NOT feel guilty?

posted November 07, 2010 10:19 PM         

If person:
A's moon conjuncts B's Neptune
B's MC conjuncts A's Neptune

posted November 08, 2010 07:05 AM         

quote:

---

On a brief reading of your aspects, YOU seem like the stronger of the two.
Do you feel as if you are the "man" i.e the stronger ,more decisive one?

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Well, let's say between-the-sheets I was always the leading one, the decision-maker in everything... I'm very aware that I need to pull the strings in this area so it's probably no coincidence that his Venus is on my Mars in a small orb. I need Venus in a Man... I read once that a woman's Mars on a man's Venus is better than vice versa and in my case I can very well relate to that.

But.. in the daily routine of easy life it's mainly him taking the decisions, it feels/felt natural and I don't mind which must be due to his Sun trine my Moon.
When we had a fight/broke up for the hundredth time *I* was always the one who came back. Recently he said he was always too proud for doing that.