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Author
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Topic: Search for Identity
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Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 12578
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted June 19, 2011 04:33 PM
  
Can you explain why Maira,if you care to.If this is an annoying question--ignore  ------------------
Enlightenment doesn't result from sitting around visualizing images of light, but from integrating the darker aspects of the self into the conscious personality
Jung
You must lose your life for My sake in order to find it .
Jesus
He who controls his Spirit is greater than he who controls a city
Proverbs IP: Logged |
Benedict Moon*
Knowflake Posts: 2358
From: Avendesora
Registered: May 2009
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posted June 19, 2011 07:12 PM
quote:
Originally posted by maira:
Hi! I think your ascendant might be off a few degrees (25 degrees Virgo), and that your Sun is also in the 7th. I thought that when I was reading your description, before reading your chart. Check out the info on that placement and see if it fits.Moon and Sun in the 7th would make a great candidate for what you describe 
I think Sun conjunct DC from the 6th house (which she has) could have a similar effect to the pure 7th house sun. Especially with mutable house involvement.
I originally thought possible Sun/Neptune square when reading your original description, OP, but I would with Maira agree DC influence makes sense. I had this problem as a teenager ( as a 7th house Sun with Neptune also transiting the 1st at the time) and now I just float around. I guess I'm trying to put "me" together now since I was so crappy at it in the past. IP: Logged |
lunatic
Knowflake Posts: 244
From:
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted June 19, 2011 07:34 PM
I know a girl who acts like that and she has a lot of Neptune in her chart.
Question: Do you feel you have your own personality established, but you tend to reflect the other's personalities, or you get lost with the interaction and you don't know where yourself begins and ends..IP: Logged |
avocadosandwich
Knowflake Posts: 66
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 19, 2011 08:31 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Ami Anne:
So, for you,your water is super strong,it seems.
You seem to say you feel very watery if I am hearing you correctly.
Yes - very soft and squishy and easily hurt but I tend to stick my chin out and get on with it. I used to show my hurt feelings but was ridiculed for it. Now I pull out my Aries Moon and go crazy.  IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 12578
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted June 19, 2011 08:37 PM
quote:
Originally posted by avocadosandwich:
Yes - very soft and squishy and easily hurt but I tend to stick my chin out and get on with it. I used to show my hurt feelings but was ridiculed for it. Now I pull out my Aries Moon and go crazy.
OK So YOUR water Single planet is strong.You don't need to find water on the outside.
Yes, the Aries moon would be a saving grace,I think ,a much needed balance!
Can you feel that balance within you? ------------------
Enlightenment doesn't result from sitting around visualizing images of light, but from integrating the darker aspects of the self into the conscious personality
Jung
You must lose your life for My sake in order to find it .
Jesus
He who controls his Spirit is greater than he who controls a city
Proverbs IP: Logged |
avocadosandwich
Knowflake Posts: 66
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 19, 2011 08:38 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Ami Anne:
Mercury conjunct Chiron would indicate pain with your mind somehow.
Do you have any problems such as ADD, learning disorders etc.
Do you find it hard to process info?
How would you see this aspect as playing out.It is in Aries so your mind would be fast and your speech would be bold ,I think one could say.
What are your thoughts on this aspect?
I was labelled a "gifted" student and packed off to a special program because of my writing, art, and drama. Despite what people think, I consider much of that a problem... I had the big words and the big ideas at a young age, and nothing of the maturity. I wonder if I'm not actually "twice-exceptional" because some mathematical things just make absolutely no sense to me unless they are turned upside-down and inside-out. Spatial problems are a mystery. I am a great bluffer, though...
IP: Logged |
avocadosandwich
Knowflake Posts: 66
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 19, 2011 08:44 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Ami Anne:
Yes, the Aries moon would be a saving grace,I think ,a much needed balance!
Can you feel that balance within you?
Yes - although balance is a different word for it! It's almost a see-saw... someone says/does something hurtful and then I'm on the down-swing but when my legs hit the ground I'm ready to explode off the whole see-saw. It's all as to whether I will let myself. I am able to merely inwardly seethe. IP: Logged |
avocadosandwich
Knowflake Posts: 66
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 19, 2011 08:49 PM
quote:
Originally posted by maira:
Hi! I think your ascendant might be off a few degrees (25 degrees Virgo), and that your Sun is also in the 7th. I thought that when I was reading your description, before reading your chart. Check out the info on that placement and see if it fits.Moon and Sun in the 7th would make a great candidate for what you describe
Hi Maira, I'm going to look into that now - that seems an interesting theory. But - and here's a total newbie question for you - how would my chart be wrong? I wondered this earlier.. like, am I born at a certain time because of what my soul is supposed to experience, or does my soul experience certain things because of the time I am born? Sorry if that's a totally ridiculous question... as I said, I'm new enough to serious astrology.
IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 12578
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted June 19, 2011 08:50 PM
quote:
Originally posted by avocadosandwich:
I was labelled a "gifted" student and packed off to a special program because of my writing, art, and drama. Despite what people think, I consider much of that a problem... I had the big words and the big ideas at a young age, and nothing of the maturity. I wonder if I'm not actually "twice-exceptional" because some mathematical things just make absolutely no sense to me unless they are turned upside-down and inside-out. Spatial problems are a mystery. I am a great bluffer, though...
Fascinating ,so you would you AGREE that Mercury/the mind had pain associated with it. ------------------
Enlightenment doesn't result from sitting around visualizing images of light, but from integrating the darker aspects of the self into the conscious personality
Jung
You must lose your life for My sake in order to find it .
Jesus
He who controls his Spirit is greater than he who controls a city
Proverbs IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 12578
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted June 19, 2011 08:52 PM
quote:
Originally posted by avocadosandwich:
Yes - although balance is a different word for it! It's almost a see-saw... someone says/does something hurtful and then I'm on the down-swing but when my legs hit the ground I'm ready to explode off the whole see-saw. It's all as to whether I will let myself. I am able to merely inwardly seethe.
Ok so you can go back and forth between the Pisces and Aries Worlds!
I get that cuz I have that with Gem and Cancer  ------------------
Enlightenment doesn't result from sitting around visualizing images of light, but from integrating the darker aspects of the self into the conscious personality
Jung
You must lose your life for My sake in order to find it .
Jesus
He who controls his Spirit is greater than he who controls a city
Proverbs IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 12578
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted June 19, 2011 08:53 PM
quote:
Originally posted by lunatic:
I know a girl who acts like that and she has a lot of Neptune in her chart.
Question: Do you feel you have your own personality established, but you tend to reflect the other's personalities, or you get lost with the interaction and you don't know where yourself begins and ends..
Yes,strong Neptune in the chart makes you feel amorphous.
I HATE that feeling lol ------------------
Enlightenment doesn't result from sitting around visualizing images of light, but from integrating the darker aspects of the self into the conscious personality
Jung
You must lose your life for My sake in order to find it .
Jesus
He who controls his Spirit is greater than he who controls a city
Proverbs IP: Logged |
avocadosandwich
Knowflake Posts: 66
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 19, 2011 09:01 PM
quote:
Originally posted by lunatic:
I know a girl who acts like that and she has a lot of Neptune in her chart.
Question: Do you feel you have your own personality established, but you tend to reflect the other's personalities, or you get lost with the interaction and you don't know where yourself begins and ends..
I have my own personality established but I try to make other people feel better about themselves, and in doing so I often mimic them. I have often said, "I'm a mirror, not a lamp." I'm paraphrasing someone from Eng Lit but can't remember who to give credit to. When someone is putting foot in mouth and stumbling over everything, I often step in and somehow try so hard that I make myself look more awkward (unintentionally, I might add) and they get away with an intact self-esteem! If someone is cursing a blue-streak, I can come out with some extremely foul language. I've been many things, really... IP: Logged |
avocadosandwich
Knowflake Posts: 66
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 19, 2011 09:07 PM
quote:
Originally posted by lunatic:
... but you tend to reflect the other's personalities, or you get lost with the interaction and you don't know where yourself begins and ends..
Actually, I just thought of something else - I guess I feel that I actually *AM* all different things, but "watered down" (Pisces - hahaha). Like I could be a drug dealer or an art dealer, I could drink wine out of a brown paper bag or a martini out of a proper glass. I just wouldn't be good at anything at all without a lot of practice - like the world is a flat surface of possibilities and I am not particularly talented or inclined to one thing or another. It just depends on what presents itself, and how badly I want to *be* that. Is that sort of schizophrenic of me?
IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 12578
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted June 19, 2011 09:25 PM
quote:
Originally posted by avocadosandwich:
Actually, I just thought of something else - I guess I feel that I actually *AM* all different things, but "watered down" (Pisces - hahaha). Like I could be a drug dealer or an art dealer, I could drink wine out of a brown paper bag or a martini out of a proper glass. I just wouldn't be good at anything at all without a lot of practice - like the world is a flat surface of possibilities and I am not particularly talented or inclined to one thing or another. It just depends on what presents itself, and how badly I want to *be* that. Is that sort of schizophrenic of me?
That sounds like classic Neptune. What do people think?
I used to feel very much that way.As I forced myself to show who I really was,I don't feel that way ,now.
However,my Sun is not in Pisces. We ARE at our core, our Sun, so you may be like this as a result of Neptune.
What do people think? ------------------
Enlightenment doesn't result from sitting around visualizing images of light, but from integrating the darker aspects of the self into the conscious personality
Jung
You must lose your life for My sake in order to find it .
Jesus
He who controls his Spirit is greater than he who controls a city
Proverbs IP: Logged |
maira
Knowflake Posts: 473
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted June 20, 2011 05:13 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Ami Anne:
Can you explain why Maira,if you care to.If this is an annoying question--ignore
It's not an annoying question at all, I was off to bed. Benedict Moon can be right, a mutable Sun in a mutable house conjunct Dsc could act like a Sun in the 7th. As your know, I have Sun, Venus and Mars in the 7th and I feel that I have constructed my identity emulating other people. It's hard for me not to lose myself in a close relationship. That's why I identified myself with what avocadosandwich wrote, and figured that her Sun must be in the 7th also.
IP: Logged |
maira
Knowflake Posts: 473
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted June 20, 2011 05:17 AM
Also true about the mirroring thing. Once my identity was constructed, I found myself consciously mimicking others and sometimes they didn't like what they saw For instance, I was with an ex best friend, and I made a nasty face that I never make in response to what he was saying (it was his face). He was shocked. I grinned and said "It's hard to see yourself in a mirror, isn't it?" IP: Logged |
maira
Knowflake Posts: 473
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted June 20, 2011 05:23 AM
quote:
Originally posted by avocadosandwich:
Hi Maira,I'm going to look into that now - that seems an interesting theory. But - and here's a total newbie question for you - how would my chart be wrong? I wondered this earlier.. like, am I born at a certain time because of what my soul is supposed to experience, or does my soul experience certain things because of the time I am born? Sorry if that's a totally ridiculous question... as I said, I'm new enough to serious astrology.
I'm not sure that I understand your initial question. I was referring to the actual hour - it may be that you were born a few minutes earlier than stated on the birth certificate. As for the second question, my personal belief is that the soul chooses what to experience before the birth (this includes the timing of the birth). So I would agree with your first presumption, but keeping in mind that the actual natal chart shows possibilities, not certainties. IP: Logged |
avocadosandwich
Knowflake Posts: 66
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 20, 2011 08:28 AM
quote:
Originally posted by maira:
Also true about the mirroring thing. Once my identity was constructed, I found myself consciously mimicking others and sometimes they didn't like what they saw For instance, I was with an ex best friend, and I made a nasty face that I never make in response to what he was saying (it was his face). He was shocked. I grinned and said "It's hard to see yourself in a mirror, isn't it?"
I too, have had experiences like that, Maira! However, my mimicry has been accidental,and only when I get the reaction do I realise I've "taken on" the other person. You made me think about something though - I wonder if I don't subconsciously steer away from people with a lot of water because I would reflect back characteristics which were discouraged by a primary formative influence. I wonder if I'm too late to construct my identity - I feel a little old to be discovering now I've been just a shapeshifter my whole life. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 12578
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted June 20, 2011 08:37 AM
quote:
Originally posted by avocadosandwich:
I too, have had experiences like that, Maira! However, my mimicry has been accidental,and only when I get the reaction do I realise I've "taken on" the other person. You made me think about something though - I wonder if I don't subconsciously steer away from people with a lot of water because I would reflect back characteristics which were discouraged by a primary formative influence. I wonder if I'm too late to construct my identity - I feel a little old to be discovering now I've been just a shapeshifter my whole life.
I don't think you should have a sense of discouragement/despair Avocado.
Neptune/Pisces energy confers great gifts.It has it's drawbacks,too,which is an amorphous energy.
I suppose the trick is to try to balance the drawbacks.
I am doing it and I am a strongly Neptunian person.
You have YOUR gifts to offer.They will come with a Neptunian flavor.
You just want to get less amorphous and more defined.
That is a goal for Neptunian kinds of people :beheart: ------------------
Enlightenment doesn't result from sitting around visualizing images of light, but from integrating the darker aspects of the self into the conscious personality
Jung
You must lose your life for My sake in order to find it .
Jesus
He who controls his Spirit is greater than he who controls a city
Proverbs IP: Logged |
avocadosandwich
Knowflake Posts: 66
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 20, 2011 08:49 AM
quote:
Originally posted by maira:
I'm not sure that I understand your initial question. I was referring to the actual hour - it may be that you were born a few minutes earlier than stated on the birth certificate.
OK, you've reminded me of something... I am 99% sure that my mother used to tell me my birth time was one hour earlier than she tells me now. She denies this wholeheartedly, and it isn't worth the shouting match to ask her she recorded it somewhere on the date of my birth. That would put my Sun in the 7th along with my Moon, Chiron and Mercury. I might risk her wrath and go hunting for my baby book... It's interesting that you have the same kind of experience in life, and I'm willing to trust in that! You mentioned earlier on that "once your identity was constructed" or something along those lines... was this something that you consciously sought after or did your identity stabilise on it's own? I'm feeling a little old to start being "myself" whatever that might be, but I wonder if I'm a late bloomer because I didn't realise what a cipher I was before!
IP: Logged |
waxlobster
Newflake Posts: 18
From: Birmingham
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 20, 2011 08:50 AM
Libra is the most likely to over-adapt as a sign I find. It's the desire/need to be liked over-riding one's self-expression.Pisces can be a very adaptive sign in many ways but more on an energy level, than a personality level. Looking at your chart the planets close to the Descendant will behave very similarly to Libra planets, in that they will wish to adapt to those close in gain acceptance. A Sun-Moon conjunction natally however is actually a strong anchor. When you think of the Sun as 'self' and the Moon as 'needs' then you see that those with a Sun-Moon conjunction can be fulfilled by the expression of the self. In your case with the Sun in Pisces, lovely Neptune trine you will find your essence through creative expression. IP: Logged |
avocadosandwich
Knowflake Posts: 66
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 20, 2011 09:11 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Ami Anne:
I don't think you should have a sense of discouragement/despair Avocado.
Neptune/Pisces energy confers great gifts.It has it's drawbacks,too,which is an amorphous energy.
I suppose the trick is to try to balance the drawbacks.
I am doing it and I am a strongly Neptunian person.
It might seem incongruous to quote GI Joe here, but I'm getting the sense that "knowing is half the battle." I don't have a concrete identity because I was never aware I *didn't* have one; I was mixing myself up with other people and calling it another aspect of myself, but always realising that my different selves couldn't ever meet people from the wrong "worlds." That amorphism has come in handy at times, but's been dizzying, to say the least, and it hasn't actually gotten easier as I've gotten older. And now there's that sense of absolutely nothing holding it all together at the core...
Thank you for your words of encouragement - I will try to take heart and find my "self" because only then can I find the balance.
IP: Logged |
avocadosandwich
Knowflake Posts: 66
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted June 20, 2011 09:26 AM
quote:
Originally posted by waxlobster:
Libra is the most likely to over-adapt as a sign I find. It's the desire/need to be liked over-riding one's self-expression.
I definitely identify with that - I was surprised that my ascendant was Virgo and *not* Libra when I first looked at my chart. For me it's 1) be liked and 2) make everyone feel good 3) hurt no-one, in no particular order. I suppose all three are interconnected, but I take them to extremes. quote:
In your case with the Sun in Pisces, lovely Neptune trine you will find your essence through creative expression.
I used to write, actually, but I stopped quite a few years ago. It got no recognition in my new immediate circle (ie. it didn't fit with what the new "me" was) so maybe that's why I stopped. I always blamed lack of time, lack of inspiration... Thank you for that - you've given me something new to consider as I start this journey of constructing myself! IP: Logged |
etherealenlightenment
Knowflake Posts: 430
From: far away...
Registered: May 2009
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posted June 20, 2011 10:56 AM
quote:
Originally posted by avocadosandwich:
I used to write, actually, but I stopped quite a few years ago. It got no recognition in my new immediate circle (ie. it didn't fit with what the new "me" was) so maybe that's why I stopped. I always blamed lack of time, lack of inspiration...Thank you for that - you've given me something new to consider as I start this journey of constructing myself!
Avocadosandwich, (yummy name btw, I love avocados! ) I can completely relate to feeling amorphous in the way that you described. To confirm your birth chart suspicions, I also have a Virgo AC and Pisces Moon and Mars in my 7th. I completely understand where you're coming from!  When I was a teenager I was extremely unsure of who I was, and continuously morphed into different people and personalities, until I figured out that I didnt even know what my own personality was! I was determined to build a strong sense of self, but eventhough now I feel like I more or less have that, I sometimes wonder if it is just an illusion-- I mean, Neptune is just so slippery and elusive, you know? So I can completely identify with this. You're not alone. And just as others have mentioned, Neptune has probably bestowed on you some great gifts!
IP: Logged |
maira
Knowflake Posts: 473
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted June 20, 2011 02:42 PM
quote:
Originally posted by avocadosandwich:
I too, have had experiences like that, Maira! However, my mimicry has been accidental,and only when I get the reaction do I realise I've "taken on" the other person. You made me think about something though - I wonder if I don't subconsciously steer away from people with a lot of water because I would reflect back characteristics which were discouraged by a primary formative influence. I wonder if I'm too late to construct my identity - I feel a little old to be discovering now I've been just a shapeshifter my whole life.
I expressed myself badly - in the example I gave, I also mimicked the person by accident, paused for a second, realized why since it wasn't for the first time and then delivered the line I also stay clear from water people most of the time - my chart has lots of fire and only Mercury in Pisces, but I seem to absorb their emotions.
IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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