posted November 23, 2011 08:26 PM            

Also male Cappys are diffrent from the females.

Generally, I whould fit most of what you described. But lately I've been starting to ease off when it comes to work matters.

Thats generaly a Capircorn rising trait, were they get less serious and ease off over time. There has to be some breaking point.

A little bit about myself lindisfarne. I graduated from college in Computer Science, I say College because most of the people on lindaland are from the US and
aren't aware of the diffrences between college/university in Canada, the term is interchangable in the US.

There are plenty of careers in that field and top paying, I worked a couple positions and figured I could make more $$$ if I continued at the university level,
plus living 18+ years in Toronto made me believe in the work, work, work attitude. But, now because of competition its a "Dog eat Dog world"

Now to the present living in Ottawa, I spent 5yrs complaing about how slow, beauracratic and lazy people are.

But, I'm gradually accepting the fact that you have to relax also. "You work hard you play hard".

Also, generally Capircorn rising individuals tend to be close to family.

Pick on the Capircorn males, not the cap risers were only "half-capircorn".

posted November 23, 2011 08:29 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by lindisfarne:
Mk but this isn't about me.
I'm saying I understand why they cheat on cap.
It doesn't apply to me. I dnno why I have to clarify this either... it's wrong but understandable of course cowards who want their cake and wanna eat it to won't dump the person. all I'm saying is

I UNDERSTAND lol what's so hard to get about that geez I don't wanna repeat myself

---

posted November 23, 2011 08:52 PM            

Cheating is not on the agenda for my wife. I work hard and then come home everyday to playtime with her. I'm well into middle age and past my prime, and I keep my body well enough to be able to have playtime daily. When I get home stressed and tired, I still force myself to perform. To put it bluntly, a woman who orgasms once to three times daily doesn't see the need to cheat.

Yes, success has been front and center/centre in my life, and I achieve in order to provide for my family. Money cannot buy love, but money does afford some level of happiness.

Doesn't matter if some don't place much credence in materiality, but it makes my family feel good being able to buy a lot of what we want, and sometimes what we don't need but what we deem nice to have.

From my perspective, take away my job and my house, I still have my family. At the end of the day, its what keeps me wanting to wake up the next day. That's what I live for.

posted November 23, 2011 08:53 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by lindisfarne:
Obviously you're a cap LOL!

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See above where I already answered that question... I'm not

quote:

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It's my experience.. just repeating it since you are obviously overlooking very important words here.
My experience. I have overwhelming evidence that states Capricorn placements in personal planets/houses all seem to end up with the same predicament - being left/cheated on cause they don't know balance and neglect their loved ones.

Key words here:
Personal, experience, evidence, overwhelming.

---

I get that. No one is telling you your experiences are wrong or didn't happen. I just told you my personal experience with Libras, right? But those experiences were just as much caused by me and the type of people I was pulling into my life at that time, as it was anything to do with Libra.

You get it? My experiences were influenced by my own psychological patterns. So are yours. So are everyone else's. That doesn't mean they're wrong or invalid. It means you should be careful generalizing too broadly based on them, because not everybody interacting with a Cap is bringing the same needs and issues to the table as you.

quote:

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I'm not saying all of them are like this

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Well, you kind of are. You titled the thread "Dear Capricorn, this is why you get cheated on." That implies you think all/the majority of Capricorns get cheated on for the same reason. I think that's where some of the confusion is coming from.

quote:

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but from my experience all the people I know with cap in their personal planets having it effect them a lot end up with this conclusion.

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But are you paying attention to the people you know with Capricorn placements where this doesn't happen, or are you more likely to notice cases where this confirms the idea you already had? (Confirmation bias - counting the hits and ignoring the misses.)

posted November 23, 2011 09:08 PM            

quote:

---

I can't stand it when people cheat and then blame the person they cheated on. I understand that sometimes situations are complicated, but take responsibility for your actions.

---

quote:

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I would expect him or her to dump me cold and THEN go find some Libra or someone else who suits them. I'm a Cap and did this to a Sag (progressed sun in Cap) with Cap Venus.

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^^^^^^^
EXACTLY!!!!

quote:

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I am saying when you emotionally neglect especially a woman can you really always expect them not to wander?

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Ok, so... I thoroughly dislike it when someone says they are being "emotionally neglected" but then can't even tell you HOW they are being emotionally neglected. I find that people with heavy water signs are the worst about this... They expect you to just KNOW what it is that they are feeling and wanting without telling you.

Now, if the partner is being communicated with on an emotional level and they are STILL "neglecting" you, then yes, you have a reason to complain... But if you don't have the cajones to tell the person what's going on, and you are simply being upset with them because you are SO EMOTIONALLY NEGLECTED and they don't know how to help... Well, that's your own fault.

I think this is really an issue with the level of attachment/detachment in a relationship. Find someone compatible with you!

Me personally- and maybe this is all my Uranus aspects talking, I rather like a level of detachment from relationships. My emotional relationship with a guy is not my whole world and I would like to be with a guy who is secure enough to let me go out and do my thing and understand that I will still come back at night. He can do the same. This does not count as emotional neglect in my opinion. Hmm... Maybe THAT'S why I'm usually attracted to Capricorns.

Also, I think that a certain level of giving in a relationship is necessary to feel cared for. Think about it... If a guy is simply "emotionally caring" for you 24/7 and saying all of the right words and being in the same room as you, but he isn't SHOWING you (let's say, instead of buying you dinner, he's buying himself and his buddies dinner, or he's buying nice things for other women), wouldn't you think that there was something wrong with that? There needs to be a balance.

posted November 23, 2011 11:09 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by cappy1277:
Enchantress- I think you hit the nail on the head. To deal with a capricorn, you need to be able to detach yourself from the relationship in some way. It doesn't make you less emotionally invested in your relationship, but having your own life aside from the relationship helps.

I'm a cappy dating a cappy- what I always tell him is that he has his life, I have mine and then we have ours. Trust me I have dealt with the long hours, the workaholic tendencies and his M.O.B (money over bs- his words lol) attitude. But the tables are turned and I become the same way. All of this takes understanding....its not a materialistic need, its an emotional need for us. We feel more productive making tangible results but it doesn't make emotional attachments or relationships any less important because its also work that produces tangible results.

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posted November 23, 2011 11:28 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by lindisfarne:
This is the reason why they get cheated on

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posted November 23, 2011 11:45 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lonake:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by lindisfarne:
[b]This is the reason why they get cheated on

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you obviously didn't read my op as it referred to Capricorn placements people I know. Is it possibly to bold words so people can actually read??

posted November 24, 2011 12:09 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Lonake:
Glad that my comment didn't pass you buy.
A decent partner breaks up with their boyfriend/girlfriend prior to having sex with another. That is called respect. If there is an open relationship, no need to break up.
You have a lot to learn.

---

No cheating is alot more than just sex. If you are doing things you would NEVER do in the presence of your bf beside you (eg heavily flirting, touching, texting inappropriate things/saying inappropriate things, calling them at nights etc that' wrong too. It's not just sex or kissing that's crossing the line.

posted November 24, 2011 01:33 AM            

I agree with you. ;thumbsup:

Though I think people might NOT do that, because either they want the best of both worlds, the security and the thrill, or they are afraid that if they leave the old relationship behind and the new one doesn`t work out, they will end up on their own and they can`t deal with that.

posted November 24, 2011 02:02 AM            

------------------
I became insane, with long
intervals of horrible
sanity.-Poe

If the truth is relative then there's nothing that is really true.

You were created the same way I was and will eventually be destroyed the same way as well.

Who saw him die?

posted November 24, 2011 04:33 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by mintgirl123:
I know some people are work orientated, but nothing justifies cheating on somebody you're supposedly committed to imo.
I think in terms of workaholic men it's always cappy and virgo men that worship their career lol.

---

I agree completely with what you say here. I am not trying to judge people or anything, as sometimes even good people do bad things (like cheat) or struggle with certain kinds of temptation, but having known people who have been cheated on and having seen the damage that it does, I cannot feel in my heart that it's ever a good thing to do, no matter what the reason. There are always other options and no one "makes" another person cheat. I have Venus (and Pluto) in Scorpio. I value loyalty in my friendships and I also feel that fidelity is non-negotiable for romantic relationships/committed relationships. Loyalty and fidelity would be things that I would EXPECT, not things that I would ask for--and I would give them too.

I myself have Mars and Neptune in Capricorn. While I would find it hard to deal with someone whose work was more important than our relationship, having a bit of Capricorn myself, I can understand the desire to work hard and excel and achieve. If I were in this situation, I would probably find some way to work out a compromise or some other kind of negotiation that would respect both people, or at least would try to do that.

With Capricorns, I think too that working hard and providing for loved ones is one of their ways of showing affection, one that is often not recognized or else is overlooked because it's more subtle and practical and not really "open" or "showy". Capricorns who work hard perceive their work as an act of love (as well as a way to meet their need for accomplishment, recognition, success, and being hard-working). They might not realize that other people don't pick up on this and see it in a completely different way. So, it might be good for both sides to reach a balance: Capricorn can be a little more openly affectionate (though not *forced* affection; just a little less hesitant/let loose a little more) and the non-Capricorn can try to be more appreciative of the ways in which their Cappie DOES show love in his/her language.

I also think that it's only fair that you TELL the Capricorn that there is a problem. People aren't mind-readers and it's not fair to expect people to "just know". It's important to discuss the problem in a way that's connecting and loving, but also honest and very clear. If you never tell your Cappie how you feel, and never make it clear how serious this is/how much it means to you, is it really fair or reasonable to expect the Cappie to meet you halfway? Now, if you do discuss it, suggest healthy and positive ways for change and evolution in a good direction, and the Cappie makes zero effort, then yes, it's probably time to leave, but in all fairness, you have to at least give the Cap a chance to work together with you to make things better. There are some circumstances in which it would be best to leave a relationship immediately, but in this case, both people could at least try to work things out.

------------------
*I use the whole sign system*

Personal Planets:
Sun, Mercury: Libra
Venus: Scorpio
Moon: Cancer
Mars: Capricorn

posted November 24, 2011 04:45 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Malena:
If you don't like the Capricorn style, there's a very simple solution... don't get romantically involved with them.

I can't stand it when people cheat and then blame the person they cheated on. I understand that sometimes situations are complicated, but take responsibility for your actions. Half the time it's just a case of somebody wanting to have their cake and eat it too (i.e. they want the nice domestic life and fun on the side, and then they whine when they get caught).

---

I completely agree with you. I'm trying to not be as judgmental as I have been in the past, but my honest feeling is that infidelity is wrong. There are a lot of rationalizations for it, but, no matter how you spin it, it's disloyalty. No one MAKES a person cheat; it is always a choice and you always have other options. I think that sometimes people have unrealistic expectations too when it comes to relationships and they expect everything to be perfect and fall into place. It just doesn't work that way. No relationship will be without any problems or issues. It's unrealistic to expect a "happily ever after" fairytale kind of thing. That's where compromise come in. Granted, some things can only go one way or the other (such as whether or not to have kids or pets), but other things, like how to express affection, or division of work, or money, can be settled through negotiation. Some relationships cannot be worked out, but many problems can be fixed or at least alleviated through open, honest, and direct communication and compromise--not all, but a lot.

------------------
*I use the whole sign system*

Personal Planets:
Sun, Mercury: Libra
Venus: Scorpio
Moon: Cancer
Mars: Capricorn

posted November 24, 2011 05:04 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways:
Well I'm a full blown Capricorn male, so I suppose I'm the target audience.

Cheating is not on the agenda for my wife. I work hard and then come home everyday to playtime with her. I'm well into middle age and past my prime, and I keep my body well enough to be able to have playtime daily. When I get home stressed and tired, I still force myself to perform. To put it bluntly, a woman who orgasms once to three times daily doesn't see the need to cheat.

Yes, success has been front and center/centre in my life, and I achieve in order to provide for my family. Money cannot buy love, but money does afford some level of happiness.

Doesn't matter if some don't place much credence in materiality, but it makes my family feel good being able to buy a lot of what we want, and sometimes what we don't need but what we deem nice to have.

From my perspective, take away my job and my house, I still have my family. At the end of the day, its what keeps me wanting to wake up the next day. That's what I live for.

I'm out the house at 5:45 am in the morning and I walk throughmy front door at 8 pm. The second I get home, its all about the kids and my wife, and nothing else.

---

Honestly, that made me smile. Thanks for sharing that with us! Sounds like you love your wife and family a lot.

I know a Cappie who loves his Scorpio wife very dearly (originally I thought that she was a Libra, as her birthday is in October, but it's just a few days into Scorpio). I always feel so happy to hear him talk about her and how much he loves her.

I really enjoying hearing stories about how people love their spouses, especially when it's from men and about how much they love their partners. We hear all of the time about the men who cheat, abuse, rape, and otherwise mistreat their partners, but I love hearing about the good ones who value their partners. I've heard two stories (on different days) from men who come into the place where I work about a girlfriend in one case and a wife in the other case; it made me smile and put bright spots on both of those days to hear how much their partners mean to them. So, thanks again for sharing!

------------------
*I use the whole sign system*

Personal Planets:
Sun, Mercury: Libra
Venus: Scorpio
Moon: Cancer
Mars: Capricorn

posted November 24, 2011 08:13 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by RegardesPlatero:
Honestly, that made me smile. Thanks for sharing that with us! Sounds like you love your wife and family a lot.

---

posted November 24, 2011 04:27 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by RegardesPlatero:
...I really enjoying hearing stories about how people love their spouses, especially when it's from men and about how much they love their partners. We hear all of the time about the men who cheat, abuse, rape, and otherwise mistreat their partners, but I love hearing about the good ones who value their partners...

---

You know, that's the thing I like hearing too...Maybe I'm an idealistic, romantic fool, but I don't understand people who marry someone for the reasons other than being in love with that person, how do they go from love, or rather "love" to hate & abuse?! ******* it, I'll marry someone I really love or not get married at all if that right person doesn't come into my life!...And I'm a Cap, that "materialistic ******* who puts everything in front of love"...or do we?

posted November 24, 2011 05:42 PM            

I care little for the trappings of wealth, I'd be quite happy to drive round in a 20 year old car instead of a Ferrari.

Quite happy to eat home~made food & not go to a fancy restaurant.

Happy to do little but tend my plants and sing to them all the day.

posted November 24, 2011 05:50 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Chaos:
You know, that's the thing I like hearing too...Maybe I'm an idealistic, romantic fool, but I don't understand people who marry someone for the reasons other than being in love with that person, how do they go from love, or rather "love" to hate & abuse?! ******* it, I'll marry someone I really love or not get married at all if that right person doesn't come into my life!...And I'm a Cap, that "materialistic ******* who puts everything in front of love"...or do we?

---

I completely agree with you!

The way that I see it, a good spouse should be precious to you: a beautiful gift that you treasure and value. Obviously no relationship will be perfect, but people should love each other enough and care about each other enough to treat each other right.

------------------
*I use the whole sign system*

Personal Planets:
Sun, Mercury: Libra
Venus: Scorpio
Moon: Cancer
Mars: Capricorn

posted November 24, 2011 05:52 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Betty Boop:
Being a woman with Moon&Mars in Cap - I'll be completely honest -- Do you know what bothers me most?
That they get away with it because they are men. They will always find a little wifey to take care of everything in the background while they focus on their career.
Whereas as a woman you always have to do a million things and try to be all things to all people. Life doesn't really let you focus on your career even if you want to.

Actually, Cap-influenced men have it pretty good in this patriarchal world..
But I can definitely understand that it would be frustrating and upsetting if they 'pick' you out to be the wifey figure.. and then emotionally neglect you.

---

posted November 24, 2011 05:55 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by starfox:
I must be a mutant capricorn..?

I care little for the trappings of wealth, I'd be quite happy to drive round in a 20 year old car instead of a Ferrari.

Quite happy to eat home~made food & not go to a fancy restaurant.

Happy to do little but tend my plants and sing to them all the day.

'Earth' is the thing.
Earth doesn't have to be materialistic, it is a whole lot more than that.

---

I really like your perspective! What you wrote about singing to your planets was sweet too.

Me, I like to be in the middle: have a few nice things, but not so many that I'm spoiled or can't appreciate the little things. The little things are what are really important. I don't care about brand names (unless the quality is significantly better--more expensive does NOT always mean better quality, as I've learned from experimenting over the years with beauty products and other things like that). If something makes me smile, or gives me a good memory, or has sentimental value, that makes me happy. Yes, it is nice to have luxuries once in awhile, but it's nice to have quieter, simpler things too: to have a mix of both.

------------------
*I use the whole sign system*

Personal Planets:
Sun, Mercury: Libra
Venus: Scorpio
Moon: Cancer
Mars: Capricorn