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Author
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Topic: Love triangle--Need Clarity
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raya_of_light
Knowflake Posts: 102
From: Lemuria
Registered: Dec 2011
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posted December 31, 2011 12:03 AM
  
I have a situation with two guys I have not dealt with in my life. I feel drawn to two guys, one I dated seriously but our relationship is off and on again. He's the Cancer guy. He's not my physical type, but mentally I could talk to him about anything. In the beginning, it was not the case. He has grown a lot through our ups and downs, and is becoming more open-minded. He is also quite in tune with with his emotions which I like, but with some serious issues going on in his life, I saw him at his weak moment which seem to happen to me a lot in previous relationships and make me feel that the men I'm with are not strong. The Libra guy...he is someone I'm extremely attracted to. Sexual tension with me and Libra guy was hot and irresistible. When he and I first meet, it was instant attraction. What makes me highly confused is that I've done synastry report between me and Libra guy and it was pretty accurate about my first meeting with him and the irresistible sexual attraction. It described how great the relationship is with him, that he's a 'soul mate relationship!' In reality, all he and I have is the sexual side. He only wants to talk or be around me if he wanted a booty call. He threw a wrench into my relationship with Cancer guy. Cancer guy and I have a lot of hard issues to deal with and it made me feel claustrophobic. I've been in previous relationships where I was the rescuer and I was feeling that way with Cancer guy because of the serious issues he was facing. I wanted to be supportive with him. My astro report with Libra guy said that upon meeting each other, no matter what relationship we were in, we would drop it to be with each other. He was in a relationship with someone when he hit on me and I found out about it. He was trying to play that it was his "friend" when she was his girlfriend. I told him to not talk to me. I don't trust him because of his first approach with me. Cancer guy I trust completely, but I'm so drawn to Libra--like a compulsion as the synastry report described. Libra guy and I had a fling when we were both single. But I want more and all he wanted was just sex. I told him to go away, but when we see each other the tension is thick. It is also off and on with this guy. Like when I tell him no he would bide his time to push again. I'm won the last two rounds with him. I think he's a complete ******* towards me and I told him so. I don't understand what he wants with me aside from sex. Another confusion I have is that when I did the Vedic astrology compatibility relationship, the score with Cancer guy is more favorable than Libra. Says Cancer guy and I have more respect for each other and that he understands my temperament because he has similar temperament as me. However, there's no respect with Libra guy..that the energy flows from the woman to the man, meaning I do all the work to make the relationship work, while with Cancer guy, the energy flow from the man to woman, which is favorable. Yet the western synastry reports, say the opposite. For example, I did Cafeastrology.com Starmate report between Libra and I, but also with Cancer guy and I. Libra guy I scored high in Romantic/Sexual Attraction, Longevity/Commitment, Sense of Fate & Destiny Together, Challenges & Weaknesses and medium score in good communication/problem solving & success/high achievement. With Cancer guy, I scored high with him on Longevity/Commitment & Challenges & Weaknesses while the rest were medium. Depending on what synastry reports I do, some aspects are in the report and some aren't such as venus trine pluto and sometime venus square pluto and sometimes none at all. I'm a novice in reading astrological aspects and highly confused about all this. If you guys could help me in bringing clarity to this I would highly appreciate it. And I apologize for the long post, but had to give you guys a little background. It's not all of it, but hopefully you guys get a synopsis to get me your take on it.
Cancer guy
 Libra guy 
IP: Logged |
Coffee
Knowflake Posts: 2241
From: Leeds
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 31, 2011 12:14 AM
You seem like you're saying you're attracted to the Libra guy, but not the Cancer guy. Many times for women, the stability of the Cancer guy is not enough. You also seem to be saying that you prefer the Libra guy. I get this from what you are saying. It's like you need confirmation from astrology as to making him your choice. Sorry if this comes off as judgemental, I'm only going with an objective opinion from what you write.Something to say from the astrology side.... Many astro reports, whether for romance or personal chart readings, are just plain wrong. So don't follow what the astro report says. I know you're after an astrological opinion on this matter, but I can only say that if you're really basing your choice of partner on what astrologers say, you really shouldn't be doing that. May I suggest that you make the choice on your own, THEN look at the chosen persons natal chart, with your synastry and composite. Welcome to Lindaland. Sure you'll fit in!  IP: Logged |
VenusDiSirius
Knowflake Posts: 4353
From: Surfing Kite. Seriously.
Registered: Aug 2010
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posted December 31, 2011 12:32 AM
I understand why with would it be swoon worthy with Libra guy,your Sun on his Asc,his Sun in H10,Eros conj Mars,there are H12 connections-special kind of connection,soulful(I don't like them but experience proves me wrong),Moon conj Uranus-exciting,on the edge...Both of Venuses fall in H11,oh I have never seen this,I wonder does anyone have info on this.. IP: Logged |
raya_of_light
Knowflake Posts: 102
From: Lemuria
Registered: Dec 2011
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posted December 31, 2011 12:34 AM
Thanks Coffee! Appreciate it. I just need to understand why I feel drawn to Libra guy because he is bad news. He is damaged. He's just physically my type but he would not be good to me emotionally. Cancer guy is quite stable as you say, but he has a lot of baggage that at times quite to much for me to handle. I don't want to be stuck in another rescuer type relationship. I feel like Libra is in control and I don't like it. Lots of manipulative energy with him.The reports are pretty accurate with Cancer guy and I because I've been with him to know the dynamics going on with him and I. It is also pretty accurate with me and Libra guy but only in the physical aspect. I've used the Vedic astrology compatibility to evaluate a lot of my relationship and it has been on point. After I found the Vedic compatibility, I did reports on previous relationships and it was very on par. I wished I had done it on one of the relationships that burned me very badly. It described what was going on in the relationship...very descriptive. You are right that I want Libra guy, but it's because he fit my physical type and sexual attraction is very high, but that's all I experienced with him. I want to not think about him. I want him to be like my first love who I had a very passionate relationship, but forcibly separated from each other. Even with the first love, I didn't have the instant attraction like I did with Libra. But he's nothing like first love. I was hoping someone could see something in the synastry chart to help me reconcile my inner conflict. Thanks Coffee for your input. IP: Logged |
Moonfish
Moderator Posts: 3732
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted December 31, 2011 12:37 AM
Hi 
Not only are you more attracted to the Libra guy but your synastry looks more harmonious w/ him as well. Your Jupiter-Saturn & Mars-Saturn aspects show a stable bond.
Though from what I read on the other thread if all he wants is sex than I don't think you should get your hopes up for anything more serious than that. Just because the aspects say one thing, the relationship can still turn out differently from what we expect. The funny thing with the Cancer guy that Sun square Mercury is suppose to make it difficult to communicate sometimes. You also have a Sun opposite Uranus which is very unstable, which explains the on & off relationship. However the Mars-Saturn might it out balance that depending on the maturity. IP: Logged |
raya_of_light
Knowflake Posts: 102
From: Lemuria
Registered: Dec 2011
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posted December 31, 2011 12:40 AM
Venus..thanks so much for seeing the aspects...I don't understand what it means when it's in house 10, house 11, house 12...Libra is so mean to me! He doesn't treat me like a lady. And all he wanted is just the physical and if I won't give it to him I wouldn't hear from him for a few months and he would try it again. I want to find a way to get away from him...to be strong enough to tell him no when he only wants the physical. I've won round 1 and round 2. IP: Logged |
Coffee
Knowflake Posts: 2241
From: Leeds
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 31, 2011 12:46 AM
The Libra guy has his 8th ruler (sex) on your 1st ruler, Saturn. This will explain the sexual attraction from an astrology point of view. You also have a number of planets in the same position as the Libra guy.This is not so for the Cancer guy. Both sets of planets are in square, which is not the best aspect, but not the worst either. Both 1st rulers (personality) are quincunx showing a real lack of compatibility. You just don't get each others personalities. With only a surface look, the Libra guy looks best in terms of astrological compatibility. IP: Logged |
Capriquarius
unregistered
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posted December 31, 2011 12:47 AM
quote:
Welcome to Lindaland. Sure you'll fit in!
LOL!@raya: Uh Libra guy has a gf? Does she know about all this?! Will edit this post later to interpret the synastry if I decide I believe in it. IP: Logged |
raya_of_light
Knowflake Posts: 102
From: Lemuria
Registered: Dec 2011
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posted December 31, 2011 12:49 AM
Thanks Moonfish...appreciate it. The vedic chart was more compatible with Cancer guy and what you see with the western synastry chart says it is more compatible with Libra. My experience so far--Cancer guy is willing to do everything in his power to make changes to be with me and Libra guy--not so much. He knows I'm highly attracted to him and so he thinks he has me because of the attraction.Interestingly, he's a player and I so do not mess with player. But a part of me understands him...like my few encounters with him made me less uptight about sex and views on commitment. Just really odd. IP: Logged |
mercuranian
Knowflake Posts: 684
From: the future
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 31, 2011 12:52 AM
 Coffee ur funnyIP: Logged |
VenusDiSirius
Knowflake Posts: 4353
From: Surfing Kite. Seriously.
Registered: Aug 2010
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posted December 31, 2011 12:59 AM
Moon conj Uranus is marking for a very exciting relation,but also very unstable,odd relationship. You never know what are your grounds,where are you headed; Relations that begin and end in the spur of the moment. You are never bored.Sun/Asc connections are classical attraction aspects,Asc person feels comfortable and relaxed,Sun person suits them in many ways,Sun person is an active force,Asc person may feel 'we are the same' just Sun person embodies qualities of the sign you share more strongly. MC/Sun connection points to idealisations,Sun person is somebody you admire and worship,MC person feels that is better just by being in contact to that person. IP: Logged |
raya_of_light
Knowflake Posts: 102
From: Lemuria
Registered: Dec 2011
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posted December 31, 2011 01:02 AM
@CapriquariusHe is single. Would not mess with dude if he was with someone. I mentioned that he had hit on me when he had a girlfriend...it was like Romeo and Juliet scene when he and I first met...enthrallment. He was starring at me while we were in a staff meeting for the very first time. I was a new hire. And I happened to sit next to him and he couldn't keep his eyes off me. And I tried to keep my eyes off him, but it was really really hard. I had to find out whether he was single and my sister saw his picture and she was like...uh..he's the boyfriend of my music teacher. I was like aahhhhhh! After that, when he tried to talk to me, I tried to give him a chance to come clean, but he said she was his "friend." All my interactions with him was through texts. I text him to tell him I don't mess with guys who have a significant other and shamed on him. Then I decided to give Cancer guy a chance because Libra guy didn't work out. Libra guy made a move on me again when he was single but I was with someone. Told him no. He kept on trying. And I was facing difficulties with Cancer guy and I was feeling the compulsion towards Libra and so I broke off with Cancer guy as I didn't want to cheat. And so the adventure with Libra guy. And I still have feelings for Cancer guy because he is the only one in my life who understands me totally (close enough)...my quirks...my eccentricities...my need for complete freedom...and he cares about my feelings... Libra...not so much. SEX is in his eyes when he looks at me. IP: Logged |
Lonake
Moderator Posts: 8748
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 31, 2011 01:03 AM
quote:
Originally posted by VenusDiSirius:
Both of Venuses fall in H11,oh I have never seen this,I wonder does anyone have info on this..
I can type something up, if you want, just one view on it (Planets in Synastry, Neville), Sample,
quote:
In many ways this may be the most rewarding and promising overlay for the Venus person. The response is very warm and appreciative without being unrealistic or clouded by impossible aspirations. The qualities which the Venus person perceives in the house person are the sort that encourage an almost immediate offer of acceptance and unhurried willingness to search out the wishes and interests of the house person, trying to find areas of common ground. The house person will usually find this undemanding and open initiative a welcome respite from the jockeying and fencing which accompanies the typical contact with a new person. The individuals will find a number of common attitudes and interests in recreational activities and in their preferences for using the free hours of their life. (...)
IP: Logged |
VenusDiSirius
Knowflake Posts: 4353
From: Surfing Kite. Seriously.
Registered: Aug 2010
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posted December 31, 2011 01:09 AM
Do share Lonake Same planets in the same house... The dw of the houses,sort of.. I couldn't really say it is rare,but I haven't seen it so far. I have examples of Moons in the same house,and Mercuries... IP: Logged |
raya_of_light
Knowflake Posts: 102
From: Lemuria
Registered: Dec 2011
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posted December 31, 2011 01:13 AM
I read somewhere that we tend to be strongly attracted to someone who has our sun sign in their ascendant. Libra guy rising sign is Taurus. I'm a Taurus. I don't know if that is significant. I should have heeded the chart when it said to not get involve because my "odd" relationship with Libra is not light or frivolous--that it is highly intense. @Venus: you are right it is not boring with Libra..but quite unstable. I wouldn't hear from dude till months later an it is when the sexual attraction is crazy irresistible...like the moon makes us crazy or something. My Taurus side cannot handle instability and not knowing whether we are committed or not. I don't do well with casual sex. And dude convinced me to do things I would otherwise wouldn't. I don't like that feeling of losing control of myself. Hate it with a passion. IP: Logged |
Lonake
Moderator Posts: 8748
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 31, 2011 01:16 AM
Venus,
The excerpt was from Neville. I think in general, it's a good friendship aspect. It's better for those who have Uranus/Aquarius tied to personal planets or their DSC. It's easy to see the tie as a fling, with not much staying-power, in the romantic sense. But other ties will influence. With the Libra she has Sun sq Mars, so I guess he's really not pulling any punches with acting it out, unfortunately.IP: Logged |
Lonake
Moderator Posts: 8748
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 31, 2011 01:18 AM
quote:
Originally posted by raya_of_light:
My Taurus side cannot handle instability and not knowing whether we are committed or not. I don't do well with casual sex. And dude convinced me to do things I would otherwise wouldn't. I don't like that feeling of losing control of myself. Hate it with a passion.
Then you're gonna want to stay away from Uranus squaring personal planets in synastry and composite. Also composite Uranus squaring your personal planets. The sq to Uranus is especially erratic to more security-conscious people.IP: Logged |
raya_of_light
Knowflake Posts: 102
From: Lemuria
Registered: Dec 2011
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posted December 31, 2011 01:22 AM
@Lonake: He and I are not even friends either. Friends talk to each other and none of that is happening. When you said Sun sq Mars--you mean it's a sexual thing..that he only wants a fling with me?I think that is the case. I'm just highly confused about my enthrallment towards him. I want to forget him, but it's hard. IP: Logged |
VenusDiSirius
Knowflake Posts: 4353
From: Surfing Kite. Seriously.
Registered: Aug 2010
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posted December 31, 2011 01:30 AM
Lonake,thanks again!  I figured it isn't much of a romance aspect,but I thought it could be because of DWing.. quote:
And dude convinced me to do things I would otherwise wouldn't. I don't like that feeling of losing control of myself. Hate it with a passion.
Well,you are the Uranus... You have awaken the exibitionist in him IP: Logged |
Lonake
Moderator Posts: 8748
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 31, 2011 01:31 AM
Raya,
The overlay Venus H11 is a friendship overlay. So it's really looking at the chart as a whole and then making determination based on dominant influences. The house for Venus is one factor.These two sites can help with basic synastry aspect interpretations, Cafe Astrology & Sky View Zone. You can look there to get a basic feel for the aspect, and then see how it translates for you personally. If you do that often enough, you'll begin to see the range of expression in each aspect, and how it is tempered by other aspects/placements. "you mean it's a sexual thing..that he only wants a fling with me?"
---It'd be best to ask him. If you're wondering about your desire for him, there is also his Sun conj your Mars, at a wider orb. Usually this means the Sun coming onto the Mars person. Mars for a woman typically her ideal male in the sexual sense. You have a lot of Libra energy, and so does he.
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Capriquarius
unregistered
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posted December 31, 2011 01:32 AM
Look. Does it even matter how he's feeling? Actions are actions, regardless of astrological influence. HE IS NOT INTO YOU AT ALL. His actions speak louder than anything. You are grasping at straws here. If I sound cruel here, I'm doing so to be kind. Bitter medicine is often the most effective.I won't be editing my previous post after all. You are waaaay better off alone. IP: Logged |
VenusDiSirius
Knowflake Posts: 4353
From: Surfing Kite. Seriously.
Registered: Aug 2010
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posted December 31, 2011 01:38 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Capriquarius:
HE IS NOT INTO YOU AT ALL.
This expression isn't as smart as it sounds. Don't overuse it
And why are you being rude?IP: Logged |
Capriquarius
unregistered
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posted December 31, 2011 01:43 AM
You call it rude, I call it bitter but effective medicine. And "He's just not that into you" is a real time-saver. I'll stop replying to this thread now; no astrological insight to offer, cuz what is tha point? IP: Logged |
Lonake
Moderator Posts: 8748
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 31, 2011 01:43 AM
^ Besides, if she's attracted to him enough then she's gonna go for him anyway. Maybe it's hormones that speak louder than words IP: Logged |
raya_of_light
Knowflake Posts: 102
From: Lemuria
Registered: Dec 2011
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posted December 31, 2011 01:53 AM
@VenusI didn't realize I was Uranus. And thanks for the graciousness. Capri is being honest. It is all good. Anyways, I wanted to figure out a way to stay away from him, to have the strength to continually say no to him when he comes around wanting what you know what. It makes me sad because I've never been this attracted to someone and someone who doesn't really care for me. My natal chart is correct..I tend to attract unattainable people..cold..aloof... I just thought when I first saw him that he might be the one, but he turned out to be a dud. I feel like someone punched a baby to find out the attraction is..I don't know... Anyhow, thanks everyone for your comments. Is there hope with Cancer guy or am I settling? IP: Logged |
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