Author
|
Topic: Dealing with an irritating Libra at work.
|
hannaramaa Knowflake Posts: 1106 From: Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted May 08, 2012 02:04 AM
What do I do guys? She's always delivering these backhanded low-blows and yet yelling at her would make me feel like I'm beating a toddler. She's infuriating though, and I don't know why she singles me out, but I haven't liked her from day one. I ignored her when I could but was professional and polite to her if she was my closing manager for the evening. Not sure why she tries to pick petty fights with me.IP: Logged |
Odette Knowflake Posts: 108 From: Registered: May 2012
|
posted May 08, 2012 03:24 AM
If they try to pick a fight - always ignore them. It's the best thing to do.There is no point talking to her about it or anything else. I have known many Libra people in my life - male and female and I love 99% of them. But I have also been faced with this kind of immature Libra. I actually met her this year. This is the ONLY one I've known in my entire life who is THIS stupid and *low*... just low low low.. No class. Sad case - for a Libra. She throws herself at every single guy and begs male attention. It is not just one or two -- It's literally EVERY single one... It doesn't matter who they are, what they look like etc.. She will start flirting really obnoxiously with them. It doesn't even matter whether she likes them or not. And she leads them on intentionally as well. HUGE heartbreaker.. It might sound cute in a teenage movie.. but in reality - she is just hurting people and she is not a teenager. As soon as she sees me speaking to a male friend of ours, ANY random male friend - (which frankly I am demisexual so I have no sexual interest at all, but she does not know that) - she rushes over to make sure I don't "steal" him away. She will run over from the opposite side of the room and start talking to him and trying to avoid me. She does not bother me. I feel like laughing at her for some reason. I felt like literally cracking up laughing because she is so silly for her age... She is not 15 - you know? I just ignore her and move away when I see her around basically. I don't have time for people like that. ------------------ Cap Moon-Pisces Merc-Taurus Venus-Cap Mars conj Neptune-Pisces Jupiter. These are my placements. If you are a friend of mine then you probably know who I am. Please don't post it on LL. If you are unsure - you can email me on the email in my profile. IP: Logged |
hannaramaa Knowflake Posts: 1106 From: Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted May 08, 2012 03:32 AM
Odette, it's like we know the same Libra. Mine is 28, still lives at home with her parents, and flirts obnxiously, talks loudly, and seems to need attention all the time. I am quite brusque with her, but her comments really get under my skin! For instance today, she told me I looked nice and that she's noticed I've been putting in more effort lately. What ... the f? Considering I ALWAYS put in effort...I do ignore her, or I'm polite but I make a point to walk away (otherwise I'll strangle her.) She is possessive and apparently thinks I "stole" her friend from her. The thing is this person was never her friend but we're all co-workers and this girl was merely being polite. Ugh. I'll keep ignoring her. Everyone is telling me to shoot back but like you, I just feel like laughing at her biting comments. It must suck to live a life hating yourself like that and trying to ruin someone else's because you're bored. IP: Logged |
Xiiro Knowflake Posts: 717 From: San Diego CA, USA Registered: Jun 2011
|
posted May 08, 2012 03:46 AM
Whenever she talks let out a loud belch, then giggle and apologize. There is nothing more offensive to a Libra than a person with the same issues. It reminds them of their own shortcomings, even if they are unwilling to admit it.If she is horribly classless, be the same way (not at her directly, just around her). If she makes backhanded comments at you, and you are just an innocent victim of her crappy attitude, make up a 4 year old niece who you love to talk about degrading. Engage her in conversations about how you have no idea why, but you just can't stand this poor innocent little girl. Then talk about how stupid she is because she can't comprehend basic math, or how fat she is for a 4 year old. Ultimately I agree with Odette, ignoring her is the best path for dealing with her, but if you want to repulse her, act the same way she does. You may find that she soon makes excuses to avoid being around you. IP: Logged |
hannaramaa Knowflake Posts: 1106 From: Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted May 08, 2012 04:29 AM
quote: Originally posted by Xiiro: Whenever she talks let out a loud belch, then giggle and apologize. There is nothing more offensive to a Libra than a person with the same issues. It reminds them of their own shortcomings, even if they are unwilling to admit it.If she is horribly classless, be the same way (not at her directly, just around her). If she makes backhanded comments at you, and you are just an innocent victim of her crappy attitude, make up a 4 year old niece who you love to talk about degrading. Engage her in conversations about how you have no idea why, but you just can't stand this poor innocent little girl. Then talk about how stupid she is because she can't comprehend basic math, or how fat she is for a 4 year old. Ultimately I agree with Odette, ignoring her is the best path for dealing with her, but if you want to repulse her, act the same way she does. You may find that she soon makes excuses to avoid being around you.
ROFL I don't know that you can call me innocent. I mean I never really tried befriending her in the first place because she annoyed the ever living **** out of me, but I wasn't as overtly rude as I am to her now. In fact I wasn't at all. It's hilarious because she told our "friend" how unapproachable I am. I laughed and thought "That's funny because I'm pretty sure I'm friends with every single person we work with except you." Sigh. I wish I could remember her birthday. It's September 24, or 26th 1984. IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero Moderator Posts: 2656 From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted May 08, 2012 05:25 AM
Well, I'm a Libra with a Cancer placement, so I hope that people don't mind me commenting, but here's my take on it.Speaking from personal experience, I'm at my most obnoxious when I'm hurting from something/when something is bothering me, or else when I don't feel loved, appreciated, or even just liked. So, maybe there is something going on in her life. You mention her living with her parents: maybe she's ashamed of that, especially since (a) society is extremely judgmental of people in that situation (a situation in which a lot of young people are in right now due to the state of the economy, at least in the US) and (b) she may want to spread her wings and fly, but either can't or else can but has something holding her back; even if she has the financial means, a lot of Libras fear living alone or just don't want to live alone. As for flirtatious Libras, that one is pretty easy: a lot of us, me included, really don't feel loved very much. Maybe by a few people, but not a lot, and not to the level that we like. Being loved is important to us, and we see it as a personal failing if we feel like we haven't done a good enough job to get people to like us. Other people might think that we're loved or beautiful or whatever, but we don't always feel like we are that way, especially if we are not told this/shown this very clearly. For myself, at least, people change so much and no feeling from another person is stable or consistent or reliable, so even if we've known in the past that people cared or thought well of us or something, we know that it can change, and in addition to fearing not being loved, we also fear losing love. I personally don't flirt, but in the past, I've gone overdrive into people-pleasing mode. We often get self-critical when we don't feel loved--we think that there's something wrong with us, that we aren't desirable, that we're ugly (inside, outside, or sometimes both), that we are failing to be charming, sweet, balanced, reasonable, etc. Sometimes, this leads us into bitterness/resentment towards self, others, or both. It can also lead Libras into constant flirting just to get that feeling of being worth something--a feeling that many of us are missing. The same thing works with friends. That said, the things described in earlier posts have been poor ways of dealing with and handling such feelings. I think that a lot of obnoxious Libras (or else normal Libras acting obnoxious) are really unhappy with themselves and/or their lives. Now, this does not give them the right to be obnoxious, but I'm just pointing out that this is how Libras can get when we are miserable. We go sort of 'inverted': instead of being the higher version of ourselves like we are when we're balanced, we shift to the other side of the scales. mode. IP: Logged |
Desiring Shadows Moderator Posts: 936 From: UNITED STATES, BABY Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted May 08, 2012 11:32 AM
quote: Originally posted by RegardesPlatero: As for flirtatious Libras, that one is pretty easy: a lot of us, me included, really don't feel loved very much. Maybe by a few people, but not a lot, and not to the level that we like. Being loved is important to us, and we see it as a personal failing if we feel like we haven't done a good enough job to get people to like us. Other people might think that we're loved or beautiful or whatever, but we don't always feel like we are that way, especially if we are not told this/shown this very clearly. For myself, at least, people change so much and no feeling from another person is stable or consistent or reliable, so even if we've known in the past that people cared or thought well of us or something, we know that it can change, and in addition to fearing not being loved, we also fear losing love. I personally don't flirt, but in the past, I've gone overdrive into people-pleasing mode.
I find this to be true. Libras can counterfeit for a short while if they're precarious. I would attempt convincing her that I was this nice approachable person, so she gallops towards me, rather than the other way. lol. If that doesn't work, you can always ignore her. (Although that doesn't seem like its working very well) -------------- "Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars." -Brian Littrell IP: Logged |
hannaramaa Knowflake Posts: 1106 From: Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted May 08, 2012 12:44 PM
quote: Originally posted by RegardesPlatero: Well, I'm a Libra with a Cancer placement, so I hope that people don't mind me commenting, but here's my take on it.Speaking from personal experience, I'm at my most obnoxious when I'm hurting from something/when something is bothering me, or else when I don't feel loved, appreciated, or even just liked. So, maybe there is something going on in her life. You mention her living with her parents: maybe she's ashamed of that, especially since (a) society is extremely judgmental of people in that situation (a situation in which a lot of young people are in right now due to the state of the economy, at least in the US) and (b) she may want to spread her wings and fly, but either can't or else can but has something holding her back; even if she has the financial means, a lot of Libras fear living alone or just don't want to live alone. As for flirtatious Libras, that one is pretty easy: a lot of us, me included, really don't feel loved very much. Maybe by a few people, but not a lot, and not to the level that we like. Being loved is important to us, and we see it as a personal failing if we feel like we haven't done a good enough job to get people to like us. Other people might think that we're loved or beautiful or whatever, but we don't always feel like we are that way, especially if we are not told this/shown this very clearly. For myself, at least, people change so much and no feeling from another person is stable or consistent or reliable, so even if we've known in the past that people cared or thought well of us or something, we know that it can change, and in addition to fearing not being loved, we also fear losing love. I personally don't flirt, but in the past, I've gone overdrive into people-pleasing mode. We often get self-critical when we don't feel loved--we think that there's something wrong with us, that we aren't desirable, that we're ugly (inside, outside, or sometimes both), that we are failing to be charming, sweet, balanced, reasonable, etc. Sometimes, this leads us into bitterness/resentment towards self, others, or both. It can also lead Libras into constant flirting just to get that feeling of being worth something--a feeling that many of us are missing. The same thing works with friends. That said, the things described in earlier posts have been poor ways of dealing with and handling such feelings. I think that a lot of obnoxious Libras (or else normal Libras acting obnoxious) are really unhappy with themselves and/or their lives. Now, this does not give them the right to be obnoxious, but I'm just pointing out that this is how Libras can get when we are miserable. We go sort of 'inverted': instead of being the higher version of ourselves like we are when we're balanced, we shift to the other side of the scales. mode.
This is just human nature, not just a Libra thing. IP: Logged |
Capriquarius Knowflake Posts: 1856 From: So. Cal Registered: Dec 2010
|
posted May 09, 2012 02:25 AM
quote: Originally posted by Xiiro: Whenever she talks let out a loud belch, then giggle and apologize. There is nothing more offensive to a Libra than a person with the same issues. It reminds them of their own shortcomings, even if they are unwilling to admit it.If she is horribly classless, be the same way (not at her directly, just around her). If she makes backhanded comments at you, and you are just an innocent victim of her crappy attitude, make up a 4 year old niece who you love to talk about degrading. Engage her in conversations about how you have no idea why, but you just can't stand this poor innocent little girl. Then talk about how stupid she is because she can't comprehend basic math, or how fat she is for a 4 year old. Ultimately I agree with Odette, ignoring her is the best path for dealing with her, but if you want to repulse her, act the same way she does. You may find that she soon makes excuses to avoid being around you.
That's SOOOOO clever, Xiiro! Did u think up of that ALL by yourself?! Impressive! It is the perfect passive-aggressive strategy, and so mature. I can totally see teenage girls and catty women in dysfunctional offices having a field day with this one. ^_^IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero Moderator Posts: 2656 From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted May 09, 2012 06:17 AM
quote: Originally posted by hannaramaa: This is just human nature, not just a Libra thing.
I'd say that it's really pronounced in Libras, though, more so than a lot of other signs. It happens to other signs, but it seems to happen a lot to Libras/Libra-influenced people, more so than others. Probably why some people don't like us very much. IP: Logged |
Odette Knowflake Posts: 108 From: Registered: May 2012
|
posted May 09, 2012 07:12 AM
This is a catty woman who was born in October.. so her style of being catty may be Libran.. but catty IS catty IS catty (regardless of sign). And.... 'catty' is not worthy of attention.... because cattiness craves attention, it survives on attention and it dies out without attention.... kinda like a fish out of water. So just ignore her Focus on the inwardly happy people. IP: Logged |
Odette Knowflake Posts: 108 From: Registered: May 2012
|
posted May 09, 2012 07:15 AM
Regardes - quote: that it's really pronounced in Libras, though, more so than a lot of other signs.
I'm sorry if I misunderstood this, but do you mean that cattiness is more pronounced? Because I have only met one catty Libra my whole life... so that's not a lot. IP: Logged |
Capriquarius Knowflake Posts: 1856 From: So. Cal Registered: Dec 2010
|
posted May 09, 2012 07:19 AM
LolsIP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero Moderator Posts: 2656 From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted May 09, 2012 08:11 AM
quote: Originally posted by Odette: Regardes - I'm sorry if I misunderstood this, but do you mean that cattiness is more pronounced? Because I have only met one catty Libra my whole life... so that's not a lot.
No, I meant that not feeling loved and acting out as a result seems to happen a lot to Libras--basically, the insecurities that I described, as well as never feeling loved even if others seem to think that you are, plus constantly worrying about not being worthy of love or about losing love tend to happen a lot to Libras. Not to say that it can only happen to Libras, but that Libras seem to be much more insecure and to act in the way that I described under the surface than do other signs. Other signs have insecurities, but they tend to (at least to me) show up differently. Aries/heavy Aries influence, for example, might go around acting macho instead. Again, not a cut-and-dried rule, just a tendency that I've noticed with people that I've known. IP: Logged |
hannaramaa Knowflake Posts: 1106 From: Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted May 09, 2012 11:28 AM
quote: Originally posted by RegardesPlatero: Probably why some people don't like us very much.
No, it's probably the passive-aggressiveness.
IP: Logged |
hannaramaa Knowflake Posts: 1106 From: Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted May 09, 2012 11:32 AM
To give perspective (maybe?) there's another Libra girl at work. Different age, but she is sweet as pie even though I'm pretty sure she knows she isn't well-liked. No acting out or being rude - she simply keeps to herself around most people. She can be whiny at times however it's only if you open that can of worms by asking. I still like her as a person though, she's helpful and always cheerful despite whatever is going on in her personal life. I bring her up because I do keep my distance from her and she still isn't catty towards me.Not much else I'll do but ignore the other Libra though. People have been like "Report her!" but if there's a trait I notice with Libras it's that they are VERY good at subtlety and hidden undertones. I can't (well, I wouldn't anyways... snitches get stitches.) report her based off what I think is a catty remark. IP: Logged |
Xiiro Knowflake Posts: 717 From: San Diego CA, USA Registered: Jun 2011
|
posted May 09, 2012 01:58 PM
quote: Originally posted by Capriquarius: That's SOOOOO clever, Xiiro! Did u think up of that ALL by yourself?! Impressive! It is the perfect passive-aggressive strategy, and so mature. I can totally see teenage girls and catty women in dysfunctional offices having a field day with this one. ^_^
Aww obvious troll, I appear to have offended you in some way... Your tears are delicious. =D IP: Logged |
SoStellarOne Newflake Posts: 1 From: Charleston,SC, US Registered: Feb 2012
|
posted May 09, 2012 07:41 PM
I once had a Libra co-worker who was irritating. I mean, he was worst than jock itch. He just wouldn't shut up and what made matters worst is that he was loud too. I'm a Pisces and I haven't met too many Libras that I like or get along with. Atleast that is what I thought until a few months ago. I became friends with a Libra with a Taurus Moon, Venus and Mars both in Virgo. He's the coolest, most modest and humble guy I know.IP: Logged |
hannaramaa Knowflake Posts: 1106 From: Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted May 09, 2012 07:49 PM
quote: Originally posted by SoStellarOne: I once had a Libra co-worker who was irritating. I mean, he was worst than jock itch. He just wouldn't shut up and what made matters worst is that he was loud too. I'm a Pisces and I haven't met too many Libras that I like or get along with. Atleast that is what I thought until a few months ago. I became friends with a Libra with a Taurus Moon, Venus and Mars both in Virgo. He's the coolest, most modest and humble guy I know.
This girl is similar. I know all the opposites in the zodiac are supposed to share something in common or have common traits, so whenever she's at work talking I always think of how she's acting like an Aries. Except I'm an Aries... and I don't act like that. And who says "Oh Hanna we love you! You're like the sister we never had... or wanted." "You look nice today, I notice you've been putting in a little more effort recently." And she always stares at me weird... it's hard to creep me out but she does easily. IP: Logged |
Doreen Knowflake Posts: 345 From: Registered: Jun 2009
|
posted May 09, 2012 07:51 PM
quote: Originally posted by hannaramaa: What do I do guys? She's always delivering these backhanded low-blows and yet yelling at her would make me feel like I'm beating a toddler. She's infuriating though, and I don't know why she singles me out, but I haven't liked her from day one. I ignored her when I could but was professional and polite to her if she was my closing manager for the evening. Not sure why she tries to pick petty fights with me.
One word to help deal with this person and it is Drum roll please IGNORE ------------------ The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong - Mahatma Gandhi You must be the change you want to see in the world - Mahatma Gandhi IP: Logged |
hannaramaa Knowflake Posts: 1106 From: Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted May 10, 2012 11:42 AM
quote: Originally posted by Doreen: One word to help deal with this person and it is Drum roll please IGNORE
Which I've done. But what am I supposed to do when she says "Hi" to me in a work setting? Still ignore her? IP: Logged |
Doreen Knowflake Posts: 345 From: Registered: Jun 2009
|
posted May 10, 2012 12:00 PM
quote: Originally posted by hannaramaa: Which I've done. But what am I supposed to do when she says "Hi" to me in a work setting? Still ignore her?
Well you could pretend not to hear act deaf it helps when dealing with weirdos ------------------ The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong - Mahatma Gandhi You must be the change you want to see in the world - Mahatma Gandhi Sun - Aries Moon - Sagittarius Rising - Leo IP: Logged |
hannaramaa Knowflake Posts: 1106 From: Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted May 10, 2012 12:15 PM
quote: Originally posted by Doreen: Well you could pretend not to hear act deaf it helps when dealing with weirdos
LOL good point. She is a stubborn Libra though and persistent. I suppose I could get a new job but I think "I'm always going to have to work with people I don't like." IP: Logged |
ScorpioMoonMan Newflake Posts: 3 From: cincy usa Registered: Apr 2012
|
posted May 10, 2012 02:55 PM
quote: Originally posted by hannaramaa: What do I do guys? She's always delivering these backhanded low-blows and yet yelling at her would make me feel like I'm beating a toddler. She's infuriating though, and I don't know why she singles me out, but I haven't liked her from day one. I ignored her when I could but was professional and polite to her if she was my closing manager for the evening. Not sure why she tries to pick petty fights with me.
Why would anyone want to pick a fight with you? Maybe she just wants to be your friend but you are too uptight and/or paranoid? IP: Logged |
ScorpioMoonMan Newflake Posts: 3 From: cincy usa Registered: Apr 2012
|
posted May 10, 2012 02:57 PM
nmIP: Logged | |