posted August 09, 2012 08:23 PM            

And I have refrained from being blunt when I thought it would do no good and serve no purpose but to cause offense. For example I ate at a sandwich place with 2 kids and found their sandwiches to be edible but not as good as my own and only worth about half of what I paid, IMO. Sheesh, even the bread tore apart with its fixings spilling out while we were eating it. So we never went back. Then one day I was hungry and had over a half hour to wait for a bus so I chose to get a sandwich, even if I felt I paid handsomely for the convenience. The manager commented (and sounded a little annoyed to me) that he saw me walk by all the time and not come in. I refrained from telling him that I made better sandwiches at home and he was way overpriced because I didn't say how that would be helpful at all and cause some pointless upset (at the same time I refused to say any lies on how good his place was as I felt that would be a disservice and thus just smiled & shrugged). I briefly considered suggesting he get sturdier bread (with some name brand suggestions) but decided that would probably cost more and even if he didn't raise prices I still wouldn't make a habit of eating there so I refrained even from that (and I recall a chef that went ballistic when I put some ketchup on fries he made and worried he might be another nut case like that over any perceived criticism on how he prepared his food).

I did wonder later if maybe I should've. Maybe he was hoping for some input even if unpleasant. But thinking about it I figured there was no way he could lower prices to what I thought they were worth and remain open. And I think it would've just made him really angry and discouraged him so I think I made the right choice.

However, when I first moved to Venice, CA I tried making it as a henna artist as I'd made some decent money that way near the Oregon border. But I was no match for the skilled artists present, nor did I have their sophisticated tools. I didn't take it personally, I recognized I was out of my league and there was no way to compete so I adapted. If someone told me that before I decided it on my own I don't think I'd have taken offense, and I might've even felt grateful for the heads up before I wasted any more time (once I decided it was an accurate statement, which I would've real fast).

posted August 09, 2012 09:48 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lonake:
You can be honest with a Sadge they can take it but other signs you have to worry about. Or not

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I can take it if I ask first. I'll ask you to be nice if I need it.

My Sadge mother doesn't always take to honesty. He Libra Moon likes to smooth things over (I'm guessing, since I have Moon conjunct Venus, and do the same thing).

We've been arguing, and I brought up something from my childood and teen years, that affected me more strongly than anyone realized - and my sister keeps yelling at me to get over it, when she doesn't understand how deeply it's ingrained. I keep having dreams about certain things, and waking up ****** , and being told that I have no respect for others, and can't see their sides of things - that flared my temper.

I've spent my whole life seeing everyone else's side, and making excuses, and I didn't deal with things in the right way for me, because of it. It seems I should have pulled out the so-called negative traits of Aries much sooner. Only I hate hurting feelings and embarrassing others, as much as I hate us not speaking.

posted August 09, 2012 10:26 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by teasel:
My Sadge mother doesn't always take to honesty. He Libra Moon likes to smooth things over (I'm guessing, since I have Moon conjunct Venus, and do the same thing).

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posted August 09, 2012 11:04 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Blind writer:
Sag sun, Libra moon here. I don't think that's it. I value honesty like I value the air I breathe. She might appear upset at first because of the social disruption, but - at least in my case - I'm ultimately happier to be in the know.

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I ultimately value it, but my feelings are really hurt at first. We argued about something that she's lied to me about, to spare my feelings; I pointed out to her that I asked for a reason: I wanted to know if I'd done something that needed amending (I had asked her if I'd woken her up, and she said that I hadn't - now I'm told that I have no respect for people trying to sleep. Um, really??? I'm not throwing wild parties, not blaring anything out. I can't remember why I asked a few times.)

When I was a teenager, she asked my opinion on her outfit. She was in a rush, and when I said that I wasn't sure, she got angry at me, declared that she didn't have time to change, and stormed out. We've laughed about that since, and she acknowledged that she shouldn't have asked me something when she wasn't prepared to hear the answer. She always looked nice, and I'm no fashion guru, so I'm stumped when someone asks my opinion.

I tell the truth; I didn't mean that I didn't, above. I just try to say it in a way that spares feelings. I've learned the hard way that it's better to know the truth right away, so that you don't get Neptuned into believing something that isn't real. I saw something on Facebook - a cartoon about our biggest renewable source being Denial. So true.