posted September 29, 2012 01:52 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by C1ND3R:
Well, o0-k, then...

Neptune will give her a few alcoholics and psychic vampires but no disabled people.

For topic's sake, starish, i have the mars square with neptune and i also grew up seeing first hand the effects of someone dealing with their chiron in the twelfth.

It's the basis of my comment.

Cheers.

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posted September 29, 2012 02:52 PM            

Males - ALL NERDS. Usually gamers, engineers, artists, very rare that I will attract a jock and even rarer a preppy boy. Usually they are an Air sign or have one in their Moon, Mercury, or Venus sign.

Every now and again a user or a person who expects me to take care of them shows up but I eventually show them the door.

Aries moon
Gemini DSC, ruler of the 7th in the 9th
Dominant Fire
Saturn in Aqua my only air placement conjunt 3rd house cusp

posted September 29, 2012 02:53 PM            

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Originally posted by a_may_gemini:
I think a good way of determining what kind of people you attract is to look at your first house.

I have Jupiter, Saturn, and Pluto in my 1st. My Asc conjuncts both Jupiter and Saturn. I attract generous and serious types of guys- so a lot of Aquarius and Capricorns. Actually, TOO many Capricorns. I don't mind the generous part but I don't care for the seriousness. Also, most of the time it seems like I attract psychos, weirdos, creepos, and just plain YUCK so I know it's the work of Pluto magnetizing those fools towards me. The creepos tend to be Cancer and Libra. NO BUENO

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posted September 29, 2012 05:59 PM            

I will make a very brief commentary in conjunction with all this, I don't give any credence to Placidus house system and only use the Whole Signs system as that was how the Ancients set up astrology to be. The concept of "cusps" for the Ancients was about various degrees in a sign, but cusps has been incorrectly applied to mean in modern astrology as the end/beginning of houses. That being said, 1st house is uber important, whether there's planets in there or not. The AC is still in the 1st house and the AC is as strong as a planetary influence.

Ok, back to what I was saying...
An example: I have a male friend who has Cancer Sun, Capricorn Moon, and Aquarius Asc. He has nothing in his 1st house. As a matter of fact, he has no planets from houses 1 to 4. He does have Leo Venus directly opposing his AC and on his DC so that's where the genesis of attraction lie.
That being said, when I first met him and looked at his chart, I asked him if he attracts very weird people that he might find interesting but after getting to know them, he would find them to be very off-putting. Like kooky off the wall people but they tend to appear good natured in public and the women he dated, if they're sexually weird. He said yes to all of it.

I have Libra rising, but I don't attract Libra Sun at all. I have 2 female Libra Sun friends but the males don't find their way to me (thank the stars). However, those with very strong Saturnine influence do make their way to me (as I have Saturn on the Asc) and we tend to have long lasting friendships. Because my Saturn is exalted, I tend to attract people who use their Saturnine qualities to better themselves and others.
My point is, look at how the AC gets affected by other planets.

posted September 30, 2012 11:59 AM            

I have a number of guys at work interested in me but i don't think they know who i am as a person but probably just cos i look decent, demure and sweet... easily controlled. W r o n g impression. They can't handle me.

posted September 30, 2012 12:38 PM            

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Originally posted by lilithpluto:
I try to avoid weirdos, freaks and crazies... thanks to my jupiter in 12th house, nobody that sort gets close to me enough to cause me harm.

I have a number of guys at work interested in me but i don't think they know who i am as a person but probably just cos i look decent, demure and sweet... easily controlled. W r o n g impression. They can't handle me.

I am drawn to guys who are in earth signs. I try to avoid the water signs esp scorpio. Enough of Scorpios. They have proven to only break my heart.

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I have two planets in the 12th but get a lot of bad, rotten people bothering me.

I really don't understand why people bother me. It's happened when I look like crap and when I look nice, so what I wear isn't it--there is no pattern. I don't consider myself super-hot, either--I'd say 5 or 6--so I am not a supermodel. That's not it. I just try to be as standoffish/unfriendly and cold as possible and try to look focused on something (while still being highly alert), like I don't want to be bothered (which I don't).

posted September 30, 2012 12:45 PM            

bc of my aries DSC though, i connect the best with someone who is assertive and extroverted and takes the lead

posted September 30, 2012 01:45 PM            

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Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways:
I have two planets in 12th. I attracted a dichotomy. The stunningly incredibly beautiful inside and out. And then the weirdos and freaks. . I still attract weirdos and freaks. . Apparently, in this day and age, wedding ring means nothing to a lot of women, including those with wedding rings and diamond solitaires.

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See, I don't get that.

I see a ring, to me that says, "this person is off limits for dating" (though I can be and am friends with people off-limits for dating because I never cross that line, or want to: off-limits for dating, to me, is non-negotiable in all circumstances, period, end of discussion). I don't think to myself, "oooh I am going to go out and get that person". I don't get the appeal. Maybe some see it as "forbidden" or a "challenge", but, at the risk of sounding moralistic, I just see it as "wrong".

For one thing, if they'll cheat with you, they'll cheat on you. Not a safe bet for fidelity or stability. Number two, shows that they cannot be trusted. Three, why would you want someone else's girl/guy? That person is theirs to have; if that person was meant for me, I'd have him/her. Plus, there's a risk to reputation and status. On top of that, hooking up with someone taken betrays their partner and hurts them, and if they hurt, people who care about them hurt. So, really, NOTHING good ever comes out of cheating. I personally would not do it, ever.

And frankly, if I had a ring on my finger from someone who loved me, and who I loved enough to marry, no way am I betraying that trust. If you can't be happy together, break up if you cannot work it out, but don't cheat on someone. Cheating is the lowest. Some people never get over it and go on to hurt others, or else never trust another person again. It has serious consequences. Again, nothing good comes out of it.

posted September 30, 2012 02:32 PM            

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Originally posted by Snake Lady:
I believe that the answer to your question of why you attract that type of person lies in your seventh house. The first house is YOU, your personality, your appearance, your relationship with yourself. The seventh house rules your relationship with other people, the kinds of people you attract into relationships (friendships, business partnerships, romance, enemies, whatever). But mostly your projections on other people.
Your Neptune conjunct Mercury (within two degrees) indicates that, among other things, you tend to attract people with mental disabilities. In Capricorn, these people do not have the knowledge of how to nurture themselves. They feel alone and their minds hang out in far away and fantastical places. Socially, they seem very quirky and eccentric. They communicate in a very different way because their minds process information from a place that seems so out of this world. There is a deep need to either be saved or to save someone else, thus they fall in love quickly. They see their savior.
Your Cancer rising with Moon in Gemini tells me that you deeply care for others, but you tend to intellectualize your emotions as a way to escape dealing with them. You feel more detached from them, and thus safter in a way. Thus the exaggeration of attracting people who become attached really quickly and deeply, which is the opposite side of the coin of not knowing how to deal with and express your emotions in a healthy way. Since it's looked like no one is there to save you, and you can't save yourself, YOU become the savior.

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posted September 30, 2012 02:33 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by C1ND3R:
^ mars and neptune don't do that. It's her chiron and it being in the twelfth. People with that placement just seem to absorb any cr*p that may not even exist, somewhere and they always have a habit of dealing with those "less off" and try to better them in some way.

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posted September 30, 2012 02:39 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by C1ND3R:
Well, o0-k, then...

Neptune will give her a few alcoholics and psychic vampires but no disabled people.

For topic's sake, starish, i have the mars square with neptune and i also grew up seeing first hand the effects of someone dealing with their chiron in the twelfth.

It's the basis of my comment.

Cheers.

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posted September 30, 2012 02:41 PM            

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Originally posted by Starish:
SPOT ON! WOW!! Can I ask others that attract a specific kind of people to post their charts.. do you have any placements in the 7th house to cause it you think?

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My 7th House is Virgo. I have Pluto and Uranus there. My wife has a five planet Virgo stellium, including the love planets. She is a Leo. The composite has five planets in the 7th House in Scorpio.

posted September 30, 2012 02:41 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by enchantress299:
Hmmm...

I think that sometimes you have some control over who you attract into your life. I've gotten to the point where I can see the little signs of a person who is a super egotistical user (who are often the types that I attract due to my naturally helpful open nature) and I am able to avoid them like the plague. It has made my life much more happy, I'll say that. I also tend to attract people with mental problems, mostly because I am actually a trained counselor and people seem to sense this. And finally, for the oddest of reasons, I attract engineers/computer programmers/economists- usually men, which I think has to do with the fact that I have that fire grand trine which includes Mars and Uranus.

The other weird thing that I seem to attract, and I have been pondering this one for awhile... Is that I attract people who seem to want to add me on as a third wheel in their relationships. I have absolutely no idea why this would be. Either a woman who wants to 'compete' against me for the attention of another guy because they are the jealous/insecure type (and I am NOT the type to compete, I just walk away) OR the guy who wants to have his ego stroked by trying to entice me into the middle of that kind of a situation (and again, I always just walk away). It's absolutely infuriating for me in relationships because I really just want a nice, boring, monogamous relationship, but everyone else always seems to want to pull me in to their drama. I end up wasting my time with people who I didn't realize were attached. I'm wondering if it's due to my Uranus/Jupiter conjunction squaring my Venus, but I don't know...

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That's true.. I feel sorry for the less unfortunate and try to include them and help them... but it sometimes leads to something obsessive...

posted September 30, 2012 03:21 PM            

Anyway, I have Neptune in the 7th and I have always attracted the misfit kids in high school, the loners, druggies, alcoholics, gays and lesbians. I didn't mind them at all although I lead a different lifestyle than some. But I always wondered why I didn't have a normal group of friends like other girls do (then again I also have Uranus in there too.)

posted September 30, 2012 05:40 PM            

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Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways:
It almost seems that "he's always away," or "I'm bored" or "he treats me badly" is enough justification. Look at books by Nicholas Sparks or **** like that. Glamorizes and justifies going around husband's back.

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That honestly bothers me too. A lot of times, people don't speak up about it. More and more, I'm learning that it is so important to speak up and be assertive. There are times when you should shut up and go with the flow, but other times, you should speak up if something is wrong. Communication is very important in relationships.

Now, it's not to say that I don't feel bad for people whose spouses neglect them, but if someone is bored or lonely or feels isolated/unloved, cheating isn't the answer. I feel that a couple should seek the love that they are wanting within the relationship. Sometimes, relationships really cannot be worked out, and divorce happens, but at least--if there is no abuse--try to work things out as a couple first, and break up rather than cheat. (If there is abuse of course there's no need to stay--seeking help and being safe are what are important).

Cheating will only make a bad situation worse. Even if it gives someone love and attention and sex that they are craving, it will lead to other bad things.

Plus, any love and attention one gets from the "other man"/"other woman" will be built on deceit, and that is never a good foundation for any relationship.

I would say, though, that in all fairness, men cheat on women plenty, too. They give some of the same excuses that women give. I'd say both sides hurt each other a lot.

posted September 30, 2012 10:43 PM            

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Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways:
Half the people who are married should never get married. There is fundamental incompatibility with marriage. I get the same sense on this forum: that it's all about physical passion etc. All that wears thin eventually. It has to be substituted with devotion and the mental form of affection. The whole institution of marriage is also wrongly glamorized. Especially the wedding and all that nonsense. It's all a charade. The real marriage happens the weekend after the honeymoon when reality sets in, and then it only gets worse after the first kid arrives. Marriage is immensely hard work. It is an exercise in patience and compromise. Most people ought to just remain their usual philandering self forever and play the field if so inclined.

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posted October 01, 2012 08:11 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways:
Half the people who are married should never get married. There is fundamental incompatibility with marriage. I get the same sense on this forum: that it's all about physical passion etc. All that wears thin eventually. It has to be substituted with devotion and the mental form of affection. The whole institution of marriage is also wrongly glamorized. Especially the wedding and all that nonsense. It's all a charade. The real marriage happens the weekend after the honeymoon when reality sets in, and then it only gets worse after the first kid arrives. Marriage is immensely hard work. It is an exercise in patience and compromise. Most people ought to just remain their usual philandering self forever and play the field if so inclined.

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I agree with all but the last bit--that people should be their "philandering selves". I do agree that those types shouldn't marry, though. Cheaters, while they shouldn't do it in the first place, should at least stick to each other.

I agree very strongly that marriage is glamorized. It's basically like a "prom upgrade" and playing house. There is so much planning that goes into ceremonies, and so little that goes into the actual marriage, in my cases (though thankfully not all).

I also agree that sex isn't enough to make a marriage--it's not enough to make any relationship, and it's not a good, sturdy, solid foundation. I think that non-physical intimacy is far more important. Honestly, I'd consider sex at the very bottom of the importance/priority list when it comes to relationships, and will probably never understand how most people don't see sex in the same way that I do, but I digress. Suffice to say that I really don't think sex is all that important and have no use for it or wish for it in my own life.

I think that there's this myth perpetuated that marriage is the 'ending', when really it's just the beginning. Love is very imperfect. It isn't, contrary to popular belief, something that's always happy or wonderful or joyful. Love isn't a perfect, fault-erasing, perpetually blissful state of being. There are many twists, turns, complications, compromises, arguments, etc. Our loved ones--be they family, friends, or others--aren't perfect. They are real human people who will disappoint us, and we them. And I think that dealing with that is part of what a mature love relationship really is: seeing an imperfect person as he/she really is, and loving that person anyway (though not going to the extreme of allowing abuse or mistreatment--sometimes, loving someone means "tough love" or letting go so as not to enable).

I especially like your comment that: "It [referring to sex/physical passion] has to be substituted with devotion and the mental form of affection". That's part of what I mean by 'intimacy'. Being truly and deeply 'intimate' with a person isn't about just the physical. To me, it's about the emotional, mental, spiritual, etc. forms of closeness. Sex, to me, is just the least beautiful and least important. Out of all the garden, it's the flower that blooms the shortest and dies the quickest. That's not to say that its fragrance isn't (to some) sweet and potent, but it would be foolish to count on it to last forever. I think that it's important to find other forms of passion and intimacy that are more reliable than that of sexuality. So, when I say "passion" and "intimacy", and when I state that I believe love can last, I am not referring exclusively (or sometimes even at all) to sex. And, too, there are other forms of physical intimacy that are loving and connecting and also not exclusively sexual or even romantic--the way that people look at each other and tell each other so much just in doing that. Or the way that people can just embrace each other without it having to go further. The way that people can comfort each other with a light touch. And so forth.

It just doesn't make any sense to me to place sex on the top of the pyramid when it comes to intimacy and being in love--in terms of how rare, precious, and desirable each form is. I would put sex at the bottom. Sex, you can get from a lot of people--not all, but it really isn't something hard to come by. You can buy it. You can't buy other forms of intimacy and connection, or real compatibility, closeness, and connectedness (part of why I value friendship deeply and sex, not at all--sex is common, but true connection on deep levels is something rare and precious).