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Author
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Topic: Aquarians scared of love
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freebrainstorms
Knowflake Posts: 1414
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 03, 2013 12:37 AM
  
quote:
Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
[b]freebrainstormsI think everyone builds a shield around themselves to prevent themesleves getting hurt. Too bad that Aquarians are judged for it when Sagittarius does the same(with their reluctance to commit). Aries may dive right-so to speak- but we must also remember that, to Aries, the "getting over it" happens just as quickly. I think it may be harder for Aquarius to get over a heartbreak. Being a fixed sign (like Leo, Scorpio, and Taurus)means that you get used to a certain state of living(being with your lover etc) and when that is pulled from under ya, it can be devastating. But aren't you scared of never saying that you've experienced that "all consuming" love? Of having only given yourself mentally to something and not your heart? I think,as a Sagittarian, I'm more terrified of never feeling genuine, real affection for another other than my passion for personal freedom and humanity. How can I have so much love and compassion for the world and people in it,but become tense for the man who tells me "I want to marry you"? [/B]
i totally agree with the comment about fixed signs and sagittarians! I'm definitely scared that I wont experience that kind of love, that's why i'm aware of these issues and am trying to fix them...but on the other hand the very term "all consuming" makes me feel a little claustrophobic so maybe if i was in that experience i would realize that that wasn't for me. Who knows except the future me.
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freebrainstorms
Knowflake Posts: 1414
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 03, 2013 12:41 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Lily:
We only want who we want to relate to us. If we don't allow you to its because were very choosy about that. It's nothing personal but we're just not about that unless we've decided you're in it for the long haul. Everyone else is kept at arms length. And we don't really care if people think we're wispy washy unless we really care about them. That's their problem not ours because we don't really gaf. We're friendly but impersonal with all but a few. We think its strange that a lot of other signs are constantly telling us who they are -- or rather who they want us to *think* they are but we can see right through their talk and see who they really are.
I completely agree with this articulation, i have zero interest in impressing people i don't give a **** about, whereas a lot of other signs just want to be liked. I don't care if you think I'm cold....that is unless you actually know me super well and still think i'm cold (i.e. don't understand me) and then i'll open up way more because i care about you. IP: Logged |
LovelyAries86
Knowflake Posts: 2268
From: Pluto-Venusia
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 09:13 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Lily:
We only want who we want to relate to us. And we don't really care if people think we're wispy washy unless we really care about them. That's their problem not ours because we don't really gaf.
Total Copout answer. Very typical. You absolutely have the right to be as disconnected as you choose to be. No one is stopping you! Aquarians simply shouldn't complain though when people call them on that - it is what it is right?? Don't get upset when others return the cold shoulder BACK to you either. YOU - Lilly - may not personally be bothered by all this, but many Aquarians are! And no *Aries* is taking over this thread. We simply are being honest about what we see. We can equally not GAF. IP: Logged |
LovelyAries86
Knowflake Posts: 2268
From: Pluto-Venusia
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 09:22 AM
BTW - No one is speaking about "impressing" people. My focus is on RELATING to people. They are not the same things. I have Sun trine Uranus so I am *very* individualistic. I respect independence! A person should be true to who they are, always. But I equally respect creating bonds with others! One must be careful not to become too closed off & hidden. Hiding your core until you "believe someone will accept you" leans more towards impressing, rather than relating. Be up-front! No one is asking you to spill ALL your beans. No one is telling you to let every Tom, Dick & Harry into your close circle. I wouldn't do that either! Understand? IP: Logged |
freebrainstorms
Knowflake Posts: 1414
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 03, 2013 12:43 PM
ok so i chose to wrong word...replace relating into my paragraph and i stand by it. now i'm getting a little irritated as well, obviously i value creating bonds with people, but i trust my intuition about the people i feel i can and want to relate to, and everyone else can **** off.
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LovelyAries86
Knowflake Posts: 2268
From: Pluto-Venusia
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 12:47 PM
quote:
Originally posted by freebrainstorms:
ok so i chose to wrong word...replace relating into my paragraph and i stand by it. now i'm getting a little irritated as well, obviously i value creating bonds with people, but i trust my intuition about the people i feel i can and want to relate to, and everyone else can **** off.
Fine. I respect that. We can leave it at that. I'm not trying to p*ss you off, believe it or not. 
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freebrainstorms
Knowflake Posts: 1414
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 03, 2013 01:39 PM
i know you weren't trying.IP: Logged |
foxxyxo
Knowflake Posts: 408
From:
Registered: May 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 08:45 PM
hey i personally love you guys though you come off cold and "selfish" but i know inside you guys are actually really sensitive and i can sense allllllll those things whenever im around one....one aquarian i told that i thought he was a teddy bear on the inside and he was just floored. lolol he said that some people even think his a con artist or a "sociopath". not at all. my question though is why do you guys have to be so black and white? like you say once your in a relationship you know youll never leave even if your not happy so thats why your afraid to commit....whats that about IP: Logged |
foxxyxo
Knowflake Posts: 408
From:
Registered: May 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 08:45 PM
hey i personally love you guys though you come off cold and "selfish" but i know inside you guys are actually really sensitive and i can sense allllllll those things whenever im around one....one aquarian i told that i thought he was a teddy bear on the inside and he was just floored. lolol he said that some people even think his a con artist or a "sociopath". not at all. my question though is why do you guys have to be so black and white? like you say once your in a relationship you know youll never leave even if your not happy so thats why your afraid to commit....whats that about IP: Logged |
Lily
Knowflake Posts: 268
From:
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 09:25 PM
quote:
Originally posted by LovelyAries86:
Total Copout answer. Very typical. You absolutely have the right to be as disconnected as you choose to be. No one is stopping you! Aquarians simply shouldn't complain though when people call them on that - it is what it is right?? Don't get upset when others return the cold shoulder BACK to you either. YOU - Lilly - may not personally be bothered by all this, but many Aquarians are! And no *Aries* is taking over this thread. We simply are being honest about what we see. We can equally not GAF.
It's a copout to you only because it doesn't fall into what you want to believe. You want to think aquas are ditching you bc they're afraid of love or commitment, ie they really do love/like you but it's not you its them. It reinforces your ego and delusions that everyone loves you. If we ditch you, We don't. What happens is this....we think you're interesting etc but once we start to know you well, we see how selfish you are and how everything is about you, and that turns us off. We get tired of hearing you talk about yourselves all the time. It gets boring. And we realize we can't emotionally bond with you because your ego is in the way and because you won't let us get a word in edgewise anyway so... This convo is a perfect example. All the Aquarius people are telling you that we only get emotionally close with people we deem close-close, but you keep arguing its something different. It's not. It's exactly what we 're telling you. If the aquas you know have shut you out, it's bc they didn't pick you as a close person to them. There's no more to read into it. IP: Logged |
Lily
Knowflake Posts: 268
From:
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 09:33 PM
quote:
Originally posted by LovelyAries86:
BTW - No one is speaking about "impressing" people. My focus is on RELATING to people. They are not the same things. I have Sun trine Uranus so I am *very* individualistic. I respect independence! A person should be true to who they are, always. But I equally respect creating bonds with others! One must be careful not to become too closed off & hidden. Hiding your core until you "believe someone will accept you" leans more towards impressing, rather than relating. Be up-front! No one is asking you to spill ALL your beans. No one is telling you to let every Tom, Dick & Harry into your close circle. I wouldn't do that either! Understand?
Again, we aren't talking about YOU? this thread is about Aquarius not Aries. Understand? You guys only relate to people to get them to like/love you so your ego takes off. We relate to people because we like/love them not to get anything from them. We aren't hiding ourself until someone accepts us. Where are you getting these ideas. We hide ourself until we accept you. You've got it backwards. Your post is like this : I...blah blah blah...I..blah blah blah...I blah blah blah. So Aries. *annnd I just detached*
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Lily
Knowflake Posts: 268
From:
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 09:40 PM
quote:
Originally posted by foxxyxo:
my question though is why do you guys have to be so black and white? like you say once your in a relationship you know youll never leave even if your not happy so thats why your afraid to commit....whats that about
We aren't afraid to commit. We just commit carefully. It's a big deal to us and not a game. Were most concerned about a persons character and if they're a decent person and most people aren't so we rarely commit. We aren't afraid of getting hurt but we have certain requirements like no liars, good ethics, not controlling or smothering. That's why we dissect and test people. If we find out someone's like that or violates one of our rules, we're gone. Most people are like that so we're single a lot.
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LovelyAries86
Knowflake Posts: 2268
From: Pluto-Venusia
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 09:45 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Lily:
What happens is this....we think you're interesting etc but once we start to know you well, we see how selfish you are and how everything is about you, and that turns us off. We get tired of hearing you talk about yourselves all the time. It gets boring. And we realize we can't emotionally bond with you because your ego is in the way and because you won't let us get a word in edgewise anyway so...
It's not. It's exactly what we 're telling you. If the aquas you know have shut you out, it's bc they didn't pick you as a close person to them. There's no more to read into it.
Umm...No. LOL.
I am not selfish. I very much care about others and their desires. I like an EQUAL - I do not wish to dominate you or anyone else and I encourage others to use THEIR VOICE. Many people like me. Some people don't. Either way, I truly am not losing any sleep over it. God Bless us all. Also, I did not create this thread. I'm responding to it just as you did. Aquarians aren't the only ones allowed to give feedback here! Lastly, *I* am the one who cuts you guys OFF - not the other way around! Don't be so arrogant to think that I want you guys that badly.  I don't, no offense. You are being far more 'egotistic' here than I am, Lily. Just being honest here. Aquarians have strongly pursued me. I simply lost interest because of the instability. You guys have some GREAT traits about you! But Consistency isn't one of them! And "giving a f*ck" has nothing to do with it - it is what it is. It is not a *privilege* to be in the presence of an Aquarius! Neither in the presence of an Aries. Or whoever... No point in bickering any further about this. We might as well agree to disagree and go have a Margarita! haha IP: Logged |
23
Knowflake Posts: 714
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 03, 2013 09:56 PM
"I have Sun trine Uranus so I am *very* individualistic. I respect independence! A person should be true to who they are, always."This does not make you an Aquarian, it only might give you a trait that is Aquarian-like. We are very consistent people, we test you out to see if you are worthy to bond to, friend or lover. This may seem as flakey but our methodology is always consistent and we always seek the same thing - reliable, caring and good people that we can forge a bond with, emotionally, intellectually. This takes time and many people want an immediate, fair weathered relationship with Aquarius. If you are self-centred, you will be dumped. If you have an hour conversation with me, and 55 minutes is dedicated to your bragging or endless chatter about what YOU are doing (discussing problems, or advice/emotional support seeking excepted or an exchange which I can contribute to), you will be dumped. I did this recently to a friend. All I'm getting from the Aries on this post is yelling. IP: Logged |
LovelyAries86
Knowflake Posts: 2268
From: Pluto-Venusia
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 09:59 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Lily:
If we find out someone's like that or violates one of our rules, we're gone. Most people are like that so we're single a lot.
That is rather unrealistic. And you will stay single thinking like that. Having standards is wonderful - a necessity even! But you're basically expecting PERFECTION...as if you are some amazing prize. Aquas are unique - I truly do appreciate that about you guys. You're interesting people! But you guys make plenty of mistakes yourselves and then hide behind the whole "accept me as I am or leave!" attitude. You can't say that you accept people for who they are then *RUN* just because someone also made a mistake. Actually....you can run. But it's immature. Alright. I'm O.U.T.
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23
Knowflake Posts: 714
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 03, 2013 10:01 PM
"my question though is why do you guys have to be so black and white? like you say once your in a relationship you know youll never leave even if your not happy so thats why your afraid to commit....whats that about"We're loyal by nature, we're fixed. I take my time when I make a decision, consider all variables and assess but once the decision is made, I have made my decision and don't change it. See, this is seen as flakey. Loyalty is the best I can give, it shows that no matter what happens to you and what you do to me, I will have your back. To me, it is the ultimate respect I can pay to the other person, the greatest gift I can give to another human being - the most humane and kindest thing I can do and when I feel the most human.
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Lily
Knowflake Posts: 268
From:
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 10:03 PM
quote:
Originally posted by LovelyAries86:
Umm...No. LOL. I am not selfish. I very much care about others and their desires. I like an EQUAL - I do not wish to dominate you or anyone else and I encourage others to use THEIR VOICE. Many people like me. Some people don't. Either way, I truly am not losing any sleep over it. God Bless us all. Also, I did not create this thread. I'm responding to it just as you did. Aquarians aren't the only ones allowed to give feedback here! Lastly, *I* am the one who cuts you guys OFF - not the other way around! Don't be so arrogant to think that I want you guys that badly. I don't, no offense. You are being far more 'egotistic' here than I am, Lily. Just being honest here. Aquarians have strongly pursued me. I simply lost interest because of the instability. You guys have some GREAT traits about you! But Consistency isn't one of them! And "giving a f*ck" has nothing to do with it - it is what it is. It is not a *privilege* to be in the presence of an Aquarius! Neither in the presence of an Aries. Or whoever... No point in bickering any further about this. We might as well agree to disagree and go have a Margarita! haha
Just more of the same rhetoric of "Everyone loves me." Lol. Also why do so many Aries feel the need to write so many words in caps all the time. It's SO annoying. 
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23
Knowflake Posts: 714
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 03, 2013 10:04 PM
"But you're basically expecting PERFECTION" - you've never seen my closest friends and family, they're far from perfect or functional, some of them. IP: Logged |
Newrise
Knowflake Posts: 664
From: Los angeles
Registered: Jul 2013
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posted October 03, 2013 10:04 PM
Okay everyone, just chill. We can all learn from each other, it's not like we are really different species of people IP: Logged |
Lily
Knowflake Posts: 268
From:
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 10:05 PM
quote:
Originally posted by 23:
"I have Sun trine Uranus so I am *very* individualistic. I respect independence! A person should be true to who they are, always."This does not make you an Aquarian, it only might give you a trait that is Aquarian-like. We are very consistent people, we test you out to see if you are worthy to bond to, friend or lover. This may seem as flakey but our methodology is always consistent and we always seek the same thing - reliable, caring and good people that we can forge a bond with, emotionally, intellectually. This takes time and many people want an immediate, fair weathered relationship with Aquarius. If you are self-centred, you will be dumped. If you have an hour conversation with me, and 55 minutes is dedicated to your bragging or endless chatter about what YOU are doing (discussing problems, or advice/emotional support seeking excepted or an exchange which I can contribute to), you will be dumped. I did this recently to a friend. All I'm getting from the Aries on this post is yelling.
Yes! This is so true. All of it, IP: Logged |
LovelyAries86
Knowflake Posts: 2268
From: Pluto-Venusia
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 10:05 PM
quote:
Originally posted by 23:
This does not make you an Aquarian, it only might give you a trait that is Aquarian-like.
If you have an hour conversation with me, and 55 minutes is dedicated to your bragging or endless chatter about what YOU are doing (discussing problems, or advice/emotional support seeking excepted or an exchange which I can't contribute to), you will be dumped. I did this recently to a friend.
I'm not claiming to be Aquarian!! I'm simply telling you that I understand the need to have some independence. Don't overreact there. And I would damn sure "dump" a friend who made everything about them when we spoke! LOL. I don't do that nonsense. If fact, I'm the first person my friends call when THEY need to vent! When they need someone to listen or console them. I get to know people at their CORE -- the surface isn't what I'm concerned about. So yeah....take that irrelevant argument elsewhere. IP: Logged |
23
Knowflake Posts: 714
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 03, 2013 10:07 PM
Yeah well, Aries, you're yelling about what YOU do again.IP: Logged |
Lily
Knowflake Posts: 268
From:
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 10:09 PM
quote:
Originally posted by LovelyAries86:
That is rather unrealistic. And you will stay single thinking like that. Having standards is wonderful - a necessity even! But you're basically expecting PERFECTION...as if you are some amazing prize. Aquas are unique - I truly do appreciate that about you guys. You're interesting people! But you guys make plenty of mistakes yourselves and then hide behind the whole "accept me as I am or leave!" attitude. You can't say that you accept people for who they are then *RUN* just because someone also made a mistake. Actually....you can run. But it's immature. Alright. I'm O.U.T.
We don't care if we stay single. I said that already. No liars, good ethics and a decent person who isn't controlling or smothering is wanting perfection? Really....? Lying, screwing people over and controlling isn't a mistake. Those are big deal things. They're deal breakers.
Byeee girl.
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LovelyAries86
Knowflake Posts: 2268
From: Pluto-Venusia
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 10:10 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Newrise:
Okay everyone, just chill. We can all learn from each other, it's not like we are really different species of people
I invited Lily out for a Margarita and she said nothing.
I have nothing against her. I don't even know her! Haha. So she's good with me - her denial and all. 
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LovelyAries86
Knowflake Posts: 2268
From: Pluto-Venusia
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted October 03, 2013 10:12 PM
quote:
Originally posted by 23:
Yeah well, Aries, you're yelling about what YOU do again.
You're childish. You made a false statement about ME...I corrected you, about ME. Simple. And I'll leave it at that.
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