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Author
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Topic: Hurt by a Saggitarius :(
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dawnt
Newflake Posts: 12
From: Reno Nevada
Registered: May 2014
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posted May 15, 2014 06:45 PM
  
I did reply to your response not sur why it's not showing? And if kingofcops is right on this guy, I wouldn"t like him anymore if he is worried about what otjers think if he likes you...blaghIP: Logged |
Odette
Moderator Posts: 4306
From:
Registered: May 2012
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posted May 15, 2014 07:07 PM
I have a Cancer guy in my life (with a lot of Gemini in his chart).. We've been friends for a while now. I know he is shy and scared of me rejecting him. He also avoids liking my things publicly on FB and getting close to me in public in RL.
However he has always explicitly told me that he really likes me in private and also asked me out at one point, although I had a bf at the time - and he always messages me privately on FB. He has done this ongoingly for about a year.It's true that this Sag guy is younger and it might just be shyness... but the question is - how many guys who really like a girl (even at his age) would literally do nothing at all and simply avoid getting close, and continue this behaviour for months?
He is very fiery - He would at least flirt or try to chat you up at school at every so often.
If he wants something to happen between you I am positive he will make a move. He won't just let you get away. All you need to do is be friendly and flirty when he talks to you. That's enough of an ego boost for any fire sign male to make a move. This idea of having a serious conversation about his behaviour and asking him why he doesn't like your pics.. is ... ya... actually I won't.. because I don't want to sound mean.
I honestly just don't think it will end well. But I don't know him personally. If he is a really emotionally mature 17 yr old, he might answer you. It's unlikely though. IP: Logged |
Odette
Moderator Posts: 4306
From:
Registered: May 2012
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posted May 15, 2014 07:17 PM
3333 - If you did speak to him what would you actually ask him and what do you expect him to say?I mean maybe if you simply asked him out on a group date with some friends - like to watch a movie or whatever... just to hang out - that could be a good idea. But asking him: "Hi.. I am upset you ignore me and don't like my pics on Facebook. Why do you do this??" - sounds desperate, obsessive, like you are pointing fingers etc.. It's just not conductive to a friendly conversation. IP: Logged |
3333
Knowflake Posts: 200
From:
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted May 16, 2014 02:16 AM
quote:
Originally posted by dawnt:
Well it still isn't showing my response, so ill try and sum it up what my response was. 
Eye contact is important! Don't look away when you see him coming. Do you smile at him when you see him? No eye contact can be seen as no interest. Be his friend in a real way so you can understand each others dispostion better. If he only wants to hang occasionally he probably just wants to be friends. If he wants to be around you a lot, he likes you a lot! I'm a Dec. Sag.
Well,thats what i was trying to do so far,i'd rather to being first friends and then if it is possible being in a relationship with him Because friendship creates strong bounds with a person and you just can express yourself easily than an early relationship(without being friends first) in my opinion strong erotical relationships are created by a strong friendship  well sometimes i caught myself smiling thats true but i am try to hide it by looking down(for seconds only) so he cannot see me and all that stuff!!And now we reach the complicated part of the story sometimes he does things that are really hurting me and i am being disappointed,mad with him and general i am ready to forget him but then he does something else when he "understands" in some way that i am mad at him or not he is trying to make me pay attention to him,sometimes he tried to cheer me up and a general when i saw him smiling at me well all that frustration i had is gone(and his smile is so beautiful) magically!!Its so weird my friend and i cant explain neither!!!Btw he is a Nov.Sag!IP: Logged |
3333
Knowflake Posts: 200
From:
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted May 16, 2014 02:23 AM
quote:
Originally posted by KingofCups:
This makes me think even more that he likes you. Sagittarians are flirtatious by nature, so it's natural for him to allow girls to do whatever to him and enjoy it. However, he's not really serious about any of it. When it comes to liking you though, he is serious about it. But he's not sure how to handle it because he's uncertain about his own desires and afraid of rejection.Tbh, I think this is a good sign though, because you'd think mutable signs would find it easy to jump from one partner to the next, but it seems like he takes a lot of time to contemplate whether or not he even likes someone, so it keeps chances of him cheating on you minimal. However, he will probably hate it if you try to stop him from doing all of the terrible stuff it seems like he's doing, and that could result in a bad reaction and quite possibly a break up. I get a really immature vibe from him. As cool as it might seem like he is, on the inside, he's confused and lost.
Thats a good explanation my friend and maybe there is a possibility to be like this but on the other hand is he overdoing it a little bit?i am so confused of what to think :/
IP: Logged |
3333
Knowflake Posts: 200
From:
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted May 16, 2014 02:43 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
3333 - If you did speak to him what would you actually ask him and what do you expect him to say?I mean maybe if you simply asked him out on a group date with some friends - like to watch a movie or whatever... just to hang out - that could be a good idea. But asking him: "Hi.. I am upset you ignore me and don't like my pics on Facebook. Why do you do this??" - sounds desperate, obsessive, like you are pointing fingers etc.. It's just not conductive to a friendly conversation.
I have the same question with you too?Is it so shy that if he likes me he wont make at least something?sometimes i think that he is waiting from the girls maybe to do the first step?i dont know and i am not sure :/ As for talking to him i had the exact same concerns :/ i want to make him understand that what is he doing is hurting me but i dont want at the same time to look mean and bad at him  thats one of the reasons that i had the dillema for well i was thinking first to start by talking to him about something not related to this for example how are you?did you get ready for exams and all that stuff and then in friendly style tell him you know i have a complaint from you and say to him whats going on thats the first plan(which i am not sure if will do it) the second plan was to send him a message on his mobile phone and explain to him what happen(its a good way for me because i am shy though but on the other hand those type of conversation are more preferred to be face on face)If i told him i wont try to be mean my friend,i will tell him plus that its pity to be like that because we are classmates and that i consider him as a good friend,i would not try to be cold as him -_-(as he deserves it though but he is lucky because i am a good person and i dont want to hurt people) Anw i dont have a idea what to do talk to him or not?And if i decide to talk to him it will be face to face or on message? I am so confused about that part of my plan :/ the only sure thing is that i want him to know what he is doing(i think its about time) and i want to know the why :/ Because i said i believe it is unfair to do that especially to me
IP: Logged |
Odette
Moderator Posts: 4306
From:
Registered: May 2012
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posted May 16, 2014 06:02 AM
quote:
i want to make him understand that what is he doing is hurting me- in friendly style tell him you know i have a complaint from you and say to him whats going on. - second plan was to send him a message on his mobile phone and explain to him what happen
Ok.. Reading this.. This is what I think. As a Scorpio, this has really upset you and you can't simply let it go or "forget it".
He has hurt you. You feel he was a jerk.. even though you're not sure that this is intentional. If you knew for a fact that he was playing games - I think you would want to rip his head off. Maybe I'm wrong.. but I feel like you would. I have another question to ask you... If you had to choose between.. 1 - Getting an admission that what he did was intentional, that he was either shy or playing games - and an apology from him for hurting your feelings... or 2 - Dating him Which would you choose? Because I think it's going to be one or the other. If you make an issue out of his behaviour - you might get an apology, but he won't see you as the "woman of his dreams".
He is a Sagittarius with Gemini Moon. He will see this as emotional drama and it's likely to scare him. If you do want to date him.. you should come across as friendly and easygoing.. asking him to go out and do something fun together (maybe with some other mutual friends!) But I understand you are very upset with him. If you are sure you don't want anything romantic anymore.. and you just want an apology - and then that's it, you're done with him - then maybe it's best to talk to him - just to get things off your chest.
If you do decide to talk ^ it would be better face to face imo.. because in text he can avoid you.. or pretend he didn't receive the text. IP: Logged |
3333
Knowflake Posts: 200
From:
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted May 16, 2014 12:33 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
Ok.. Reading this.. This is what I think. As a Scorpio, this has really upset you and you can't simply let it go or "forget it".
He has hurt you. You feel he was a jerk.. even though you're not sure that this is intentional. If you knew for a fact that he was playing games - I think you would want to rip his head off. Maybe I'm wrong.. but I feel like you would.I have another question to ask you... If you had to choose between.. 1 - Getting an admission that what he did was intentional, that he was either shy or playing games - and an apology from him for hurting your feelings... or 2 - Dating him Which would you choose? Because I think it's going to be one or the other. If you make an issue out of his behaviour - you might get an apology, but he won't see you as the "woman of his dreams".
He is a Sagittarius with Gemini Moon. He will see this as emotional drama and it's likely to scare him. If you do want to date him.. you should come across as friendly and easygoing.. asking him to go out and do something fun together (maybe with some other mutual friends!) But I understand you are very upset with him. If you are sure you don't want anything romantic anymore.. and you just want an apology - and then that's it, you're done with him - then maybe it's best to talk to him - just to get things off your chest.
If you do decide to talk ^ it would be better face to face imo.. because in text he can avoid you.. or pretend he didn't receive the text.
You have a point my dear friend but on the other hand if i talk to him straight he might appreciate it because as i know Sagittarians love domeone who is honest with them (i think) but to say the truth he is really nervous and sometimes he consider some jokes to serious and gets upset!As for the question i was thinking that after talking to him and solve the misunderstanding he and i we will be more friendly to each other and who knows might that leads to a date but first i want to be friends with him to know him well(i believe this type of decisions you have to consider every factor and every sign,you have to be careful etc)...Well i am still in a dilemma cause i consider all factors of what i will do positive and negative :/ as you said i might have an answer but things could be more worse(50-50 because these will lead in bad results or good results it depends) but on the other hand if all that cold behavior is because of a misunderstandment or because someone insulted me to him and he believes him so it could be better to talk with him and see what exactly happen so we can solve the problem and go on as friends and who knows maybe something more But honestly i cant decide what is the best option :/IP: Logged |
KingofCups
Knowflake Posts: 415
From:
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted May 16, 2014 01:02 PM
I agree with Odette. Ask him to hang out with you and some other friends and see where that takes you. And perhaps, if you do end up becoming more than friends, you'll get the answers you want from him without needing to make too much of an effort or feeling uncomfortable. IP: Logged |
3333
Knowflake Posts: 200
From:
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted May 16, 2014 01:51 PM
quote:
Originally posted by KingofCups:
I agree with Odette. Ask him to hang out with you and some other friends and see where that takes you. And perhaps, if you do end up becoming more than friends, you'll get the answers you want from him without needing to make too much of an effort or feeling uncomfortable.
I am afraid that i will never have the chance to do that :/ maybe at the dinner that my class will do but i am not those type of persons that i will go and ask him to being in a relationship...and i think that if i will get close to him with that reason then he will be more cold than he was first :/ well i will find a way to talk to him friendly (i am thinking to ask him to give me his skype and give him mine to talk together ) and then why we are talking friendly i will might ask him what happens because considering all that situation and his character is best to talk to him first and then ask him to be friends!Well i am just very confused you give all that useful advice and i really appriciate that but unfortunately being in a relationship with him is not the most possible thing on the earth :/ and i donjt even know if he llikes me :/IP: Logged |
KingofCups
Knowflake Posts: 415
From:
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted May 16, 2014 07:37 PM
quote:
Originally posted by 3333:
I am afraid that i will never have the chance to do that :/ maybe at the dinner that my class will do but i am not those type of persons that i will go and ask him to being in a relationship...and i think that if i will get close to him with that reason then he will be more cold than he was first :/ well i will find a way to talk to him friendly (i am thinking to ask him to give me his skype and give him mine to talk together ) and then why we are talking friendly i will might ask him what happens because considering all that situation and his character is best to talk to him first and then ask him to be friends!Well i am just very confused you give all that useful advice and i really appriciate that but unfortunately being in a relationship with him is not the most possible thing on the earth :/ and i donjt even know if he llikes me :/
Hanging out with him and going out with him are different. You don't have to be in a relationship with him. Just include him the next time you and your friends are planning in doing something. He'll be nothing more than a friend at that point. IP: Logged |
3333
Knowflake Posts: 200
From:
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted May 17, 2014 12:59 AM
quote:
Originally posted by KingofCups:
Hanging out with him and going out with him are different. You don't have to be in a relationship with him. Just include him the next time you and your friends are planning in doing something. He'll be nothing more than a friend at that point.
Thats not difficult because some of my friends are really close friends with him and thats could be done...but thanks to my shyness he will never understand who i really am plus his behaviour showed me that he may doesnt sympathize me :/ i didnt mention that before but he went to all parties that me classmates did expept mine ok he might have some problems and he told that he might not did it...well i told him to tell sure if he will come or not but he didnt if my friend didnt told then i was still waiting -_- plus he didnt even apologize to me and the next day he didnt even told me a happy birthday(that where my actuall birthday)and at school he was really cold to me I cried a lot that day it is such an anwful feeling :/ that is the main reason that i want to talk to him straight to know exactly whats going on...if i know the anwers then i will know how to handle it.Unfortunately i cant this time let it go(i do it a lot of times because i truly love him)but i really fed up :/ well i dont decide yet what i will do but i will see his behaviour on Monday...Anw Thanks everyone who helped me on my problem by giving me such a really useful advices i will really consider them to take my final decision  xxx!!!!IP: Logged |
3333
Knowflake Posts: 200
From:
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted May 19, 2014 10:34 AM
I learned today his asc sign if that helps He has Sagittarius ascIP: Logged |
Lindaland
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