posted October 11, 2014 02:15 PM            

^^

posted October 11, 2014 03:02 PM            

The ruler of my 4th house is mercury and my mercury is very bad aspected and is also in 4th house. When I'm too much together with people for days, and have no place to "hide" I get more and more irritable and restless. I also get tired of having to "speak". I just want to sit quiet someplace with my own thoughts for a while. Sometimes it only has to be 10 minutes, other times it has to be for days.
I don't feel like I'm a loner, but I do feel that I'm an outcast for being like this. My friends and boyfriends constantly wants to be together, but the more they crave my company the more I also need my space.

I have a prominent uranus too, this is square my mars in 4th house….

posted October 11, 2014 06:33 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PisceanDream:
I do like to keep people at a distance sometimes. I need alone time, sometimes prolonged alone time, to replenish and to maintain my sanity. But when I look at the overwhelming whole, I am lonely. I have nobody in my immediate environment that I connect with on any intimate, profound, or meaningful level. Everything feels so forced and fake. I wish I was like you in that regard.

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posted October 11, 2014 07:07 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Capricorn/Saturn on the cusp of the 3rd, 7th or 11th.

Neptune/Pisces on the cusp of the 3rd,7th,11th

Pluto/Scorpio on the cusp of the 3rd,7th or 11th

Virgo on the cusp of the 3rd,7th or 11th

Aquarius/Uranus on the cusp of the 3rd,7th or 11th

A stellium in the 3rd, 7th and 11th house

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posted October 11, 2014 07:10 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by astra7:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
[b]Capricorn/Saturn on the cusp of the 3rd, 7th or 11th.

Neptune/Pisces on the cusp of the 3rd,7th,11th

Pluto/Scorpio on the cusp of the 3rd,7th or 11th

Virgo on the cusp of the 3rd,7th or 11th

Aquarius/Uranus on the cusp of the 3rd,7th or 11th

A stellium in the 3rd, 7th and 11th house

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posted October 11, 2014 08:37 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PisceanDream:
I feel this way... And I have Aqua rising (with the ruler in the 12th) and my 4th house ruler (Venus) squaring my Moon. I don't have a strong 4H presence. The issue is that I don't seem like an outcast to people... I've always felt well-liked but I just feel like I can't truly bond with most people around me. I am totally and absolutely excluded from the dating pool because my beliefs contradict the foundations of relationship (as per the culture). I just feel excluded from society as a whole. I fit in rather awkwardly and find it difficult building meaningful relationships of any sort so I'm almost always alone.

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All i can say is that I get what you mean.
I am basically a loner that hates lonelinesss nevertheless.
I blame my aquarius rising for not being in the norm and my venus in sagitarius that makes me idealistic in love. I prefer to dream the ideal love rather experiencing routine.
I have also a filled 8 house for my lonewolf tendecies.

posted October 11, 2014 09:21 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Capricorn/Saturn on the cusp of the 3rd, 7th or 11th.

Neptune/Pisces on the cusp of the 3rd,7th,11th

Pluto/Scorpio on the cusp of the 3rd,7th or 11th

Virgo on the cusp of the 3rd,7th or 11th

Aquarius/Uranus on the cusp of the 3rd,7th or 11th

A stellium in the 3rd, 7th and 11th house

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posted October 11, 2014 10:37 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PisceanDream:
Thank you for sharing your struggles and difficulty with this. I know it's not easy and I appreciate you and everyone who took the time to talk about this. It seems we all have a common underlying issue. I too have a love hate with the 12th. I hope things do get better with time for all of us but I hate relying on time and its nonchalance. I want to solve it. Do something about it so I can live and be content...

I listened to the song btw. I really liked it. It gave me the kinetic sensation of slowly spiraling downwards. Very interesting.

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Of course! I'm glad you decided to make this thread, I was hoping someone would talk about something like this, and be comfortable and willing enough to do so. And I'm definitely with you on that. I would love to solve this problem for myself. Hopefully all in due time things will become more easier and clear.

posted October 12, 2014 10:55 AM            

I don't know how to explain it without just rambling on forever. I live in my head a lot. Escaping to other places, or just observing.

You know, it feels exhausting, and sometimes even irritating if I feel like I have to put on that "social show", being talkative and outgoing with strangers.
Like the checkout, or getting my hair cut. It's things that I have to do but I hate it. I wish I could just push my cart through a doorway and everything is done. I'll throw it in bags, pay an electronic cashier and go on.
Like when cashiers talk to me... I hate it.

I'm like, why do we have to stand here and pretend like we know each other?

BUT, in the end, I participate. Heck, maybe they feel the same way.

Venus/Mars/Mercury in 12
Pluto in 1st conjunct asc

posted October 12, 2014 02:50 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PisceanDream:
I think this may have been discussed but I guess what I mean to articulate is... What explains someone who is destined, almost, to be lonely? Someone who might seem like they're confident, social, and extroverted to everyone else but are the exact opposite in reality and cannot seem to integrate with the generational social norms and the culture in which they are situated? What explains the need to hide one's true personality in such a way that they cannot develop meaningful relationships and in turn find themselves lonely?

I know those are a bajillion questions... I just think, they are all closely related. Thanks in advance.

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posted October 12, 2014 03:02 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
I enjoy being alone except for being with my wife. Someone that I can know and understand me, and love me. But that's all that I need.

I don't know how to explain it without just rambling on forever. I live in my head a lot. Escaping to other places, or just observing.

You know, it feels exhausting, and sometimes even irritating if I feel like I have to put on that "social show", being talkative and outgoing with strangers.
Like the checkout, or getting my hair cut. It's things that I have to do but I hate it. I wish I could just push my cart through a doorway and everything is done. I'll throw it in bags, pay an electronic cashier and go on.
Like when cashiers talk to me... I hate it.

I'm like, why do we have to stand here and pretend like we know each other?

BUT, in the end, I participate. Heck, maybe they feel the same way.

Venus/Mars/Mercury in 12
Pluto in 1st conjunct asc

That's what comes to my mind but maybe there's other things too.

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posted October 12, 2014 03:07 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
edit

Hard to describe~~~

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posted October 12, 2014 05:32 PM            

Cancer AC-Vesta.
Moon conj. IC (1) in Virgo
Uranus squ. Moon-IC/MC-BML-Pallas
NNode-Chiron in 12th.
Planets Mars through Pluto are all retro, with Mars, Saturn, and Pluto sitting in Scorpio.
Venus in Taur/11th opp. Saturn in Sco/5th.

posted October 12, 2014 05:56 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
I enjoy being alone except for being with my wife. Someone that I can know and understand me, and love me. But that's all that I need.

I don't know how to explain it without just rambling on forever. I live in my head a lot. Escaping to other places, or just observing.

You know, it feels exhausting, and sometimes even irritating if I feel like I have to put on that "social show", being talkative and outgoing with strangers.
Like the checkout, or getting my hair cut. It's things that I have to do but I hate it. I wish I could just push my cart through a doorway and everything is done. I'll throw it in bags, pay an electronic cashier and go on.
Like when cashiers talk to me... I hate it.

I'm like, why do we have to stand here and pretend like we know each other?

BUT, in the end, I participate. Heck, maybe they feel the same way.

Venus/Mars/Mercury in 12
Pluto in 1st conjunct asc

That's what comes to my mind but maybe there's other things too.

---

I generally feel similarly to the way you do. I love to be alone. I need it quite often and without it I become irritable and anti-social (within a social setting). It puts me into a funk. I laugh with myself, I enjoy my own company. And I am fiercely, even viciously, protective of my privacy. Interrupting my alone time is equivalent to offending me or attacking me. I take it as an offense... It's really bad.

I particularly relate to the "live in my head and observing" bit. I think what's putting me down so much is that I feel that my love of being alone is slowly taking over my life, and I'm beginning to feel very unhealthily isolated as I began to retract into my head and watch life pass me by.

Trying to reach out to other people always feels unnatural. Before you found your companion, were you still okay with being alone or did it feel like loneliness?

I often think that if I had a companion or a true friend by my side, I wouldn't feel so lonely. Even though I love to be alone.

Thanks for your feedback. I truly respect and appreciate your participation.

You're a Libra ASC yeah?

posted October 12, 2014 07:04 PM            

In the months before my wife, yes, I felt EXTREMELY lonely, yet, not at all desperate. I knew what I wanted because having the wrong companion is just hell.

As much as I like being alone I think anyone really needs SOMEBODY to be able to connect with. That's just what I think.
I have kept a FEW relationships (friendship) going because I knew that they liked being my friend. So I would "feed" it, though I actually could take it or leave it. Sounds cold but I just don't need a lot, socially. And they got no less treatment. If they need me, I'd be there. I just have rules of friendship.
I try not to give too much of my heart to anyone, but a few, like my wife and my mom for example.

posted October 12, 2014 07:21 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by TuxLuigi:
The "being alone" part is me, but the "coming off as extroverted and friendly on the outside" part is the contrary of me, so I don't know if my response may interest you.
Also, I don't feel lonely, but rather I want to be alone and I love to be alone.

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posted October 12, 2014 08:33 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by TuxLuigi:
The "being alone" part is me, but the "coming off as extroverted and friendly on the outside" part is the contrary of me, so I don't know if my response may interest you.
Also, I don't feel lonely, but rather I want to be alone and I love to be alone.

---

Ditto. I also very much relate to a lot of what DeepFreeze has said. I just don't need or desire that kind of attention. I am one of the more obvious introverts, but do generally come off as calm/calming, warm, and friendly when I am interacting with others (as I've been told).

posted October 12, 2014 10:27 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
Yeah, Libra asc. Leo sun, Gemini moon. Which probably goes to show that even "outgoing" signs can be loner types. It just depends. My nieces husband is a Gemini sun but Jeeeeeez is that kid shy!

In the months before my wife, yes, I felt EXTREMELY lonely, yet, not at all desperate. I knew what I wanted because having the wrong companion is just hell.

As much as I like being alone I think anyone really needs SOMEBODY to be able to connect with. That's just what I think.
I have kept a FEW relationships (friendship) going because I knew that they liked being my friend. So I would "feed" it, though I actually could take it or leave it. Sounds cold but I just don't need a lot, socially. And they got no less treatment. If they need me, I'd be there. I just have rules of friendship.
I try not to give too much of my heart to anyone, but a few, like my wife and my mom for example.

Well I'm rambling. I probably sound cold but it's not that bad.
My Libra asc and such makes it so that no one would really guess what goes on, on the inside.

---

It really is interesting to see such integral parts of your personality (Sun, Moon, ASC) all in fire and air signs and yet you are still introverted. I think Pluto conjunct your Libra ASC plays a big role in all of this. You might come off, while congenial, also very serious, intense and private. I can see how that can diminish the sociability often associated with a Libra ASC. What aspects your Sun and Moon?

Your approach to friendship, I feel, speaks so much of your 12th house stellium. In a sense, it's almost as if no one can truly have access to you unless they tap into your 12th house and that is an extremely sacred process. Where's your 11th house ruler?

I can see how it comes off as cold and I think it's okay since that's who you are. It's the way you were built. I don't think anyone should be faulted or blamed for their nature unless they use it to do harm to others. I think the key to warming you up is definitely your 12th though, which could explain why you don't share "too much of your heart" with others except your wife and mother.

posted October 12, 2014 10:34 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MorpHnStorM:
Well, this would definitely be me. The likely contributors:

Cancer AC-Vesta.
Moon conj. IC (1) in Virgo
Uranus squ. Moon-IC/MC-BML-Pallas
NNode-Chiron in 12th.
Planets Mars through Pluto are all retro, with Mars, Saturn, and Pluto sitting in Scorpio.
Venus in Taur/11th opp. Saturn in Sco/5th.

I also have Venus-Uranus, Mercury-Uranus/Neptune/Pluto. Sun (Tau) and Mercury (Ari) are also in the 11th. Pluto and Mars in the 5th with Saturn.

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I am very interested in the association you made with Vesta and the ASC. I know that Vesta in the houses can point to the area in life which you feel you need a break from every once in a while to feel better and restore your energy. Interestingly, I have mine in the 3rd house and I can be the absolute worst communicator ever. Taking ages to answer texts or simply going about with my phone switched off for over a day... Limiting my use of social media (FB is currently deactivated)... Interesting. Thanks for bringing that up.

posted October 12, 2014 10:39 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by NeptunianSag:
I have Venus in aqua conjunct Saturn in 4th,
3rd house stellium (sun, Neptune, Uranus and NN)
11th house Virgo moon inconjunct Saturn
12th house Jupiter trine Venus
Cancer mars Rx opp Neptune and Uranus.
Pisces Lilith.
Chiron 10th house

Im not lonely, but I have been in the past, I just feel like an alien to this world, like I was just born on the wrong planet somehow. I generally don't really care about fitting in, being popular, having the best of everything. Life should be about being yourself and enjoying the ride than chasing things that make you unhappy. I do blame my Chiron and Saturn though for making me feel lonely in the world.

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posted October 13, 2014 06:43 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PisceanDream:
It really is interesting to see such integral parts of your personality (Sun, Moon, ASC) all in fire and air signs and yet you are still introverted. I think Pluto conjunct your Libra ASC plays a big role in all of this. You might come off, while congenial, also very serious, intense and private. I can see how that can diminish the sociability often associated with a Libra ASC. What aspects your Sun and Moon?

Your approach to friendship, I feel, speaks so much of your 12th house stellium. In a sense, it's almost as if no one can truly have access to you unless they tap into your 12th house and that is an extremely sacred process. Where's your 11th house ruler?

I can see how it comes off as cold and I think it's okay since that's who you are. It's the way you were built. I don't think anyone should be faulted or blamed for their nature unless they use it to do harm to others. I think the key to warming you up is definitely your 12th though, which could explain why you don't share "too much of your heart" with others except your wife and mother.

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Thanks

Yeah, it's strange. Haha so much outgoing signs but somehow, I'm not. Though I'm not shy. I just lack interest in being that social.

My sun and moon Sextile 1*
My sun squares jupiter
Sun semi-sextile Pluto (I think it's semi-sextile anyway)

Moon square Mars
Moon square mercury
Moon conjunct mc
Moon square asc
Moon trine Uranus
Moon semi-sextile Saturn

11th house ruler is my sun in Leo

I think it's a combo of that 12 and Pluto like you say. Pluto just because it's often said that the 1st house sets up the theme for the rest of the chart.

posted October 13, 2014 09:08 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
Thanks

Yeah, it's strange. Haha so much outgoing signs but somehow, I'm not. Though I'm not shy. I just lack interest in being that social.

My sun and moon Sextile 1*
My sun squares jupiter
Sun semi-sextile Pluto (I think it's semi-sextile anyway)

Moon square Mars
Moon square mercury
Moon conjunct mc
Moon square asc
Moon trine Uranus
Moon semi-sextile Saturn

11th house ruler is my sun in Leo

I think it's a combo of that 12 and Pluto like you say. Pluto just because it's often said that the 1st house sets up the theme for the rest of the chart.

It's like as I get older I have gained social skills though. I can do it if I need to or want to but it took a while.

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What a Moon! I can imagine you have serious head vs. heart conflicts. The 11th serves the 11th then... Having friends meets its own end. I think that would make friendship much more selective but also authentic. I realized that you have the ruler of your 1st (Venus) in the 12th, I have that too and the description for that might resonate with you as it does with me.

"While shy in youth, as you mature you tend to find ways of handling and masking your sensitivity. Your intuition is strong, and you naturally understand that there are hidden forces in life that influence the daily goings-on. You tend to always be seeking something higher--such as a greater meaning or understanding of life and your place or purpose in it. There is something mysterious and private to your aura. At times, you may feel a lot of anxiety. Although you are capable of being alone, sometimes loneliness consumes you and vague doubts and fears haunt you. You are a perceptive person, and managing your deep sensitivity is something that can be a lifelong task."