posted August 08, 2015 05:26 PM            

Just wondering, the folks here who have venus/uranus aspects and/or moon/uranus aspects. I have a question for you!

How do you feel about Casual sex? Like one night stands, friends with benefits, booty-calls, etc.

Do you practice it? Do you condone it? Or Do you find it degrading and/or repulsive? Or do you accept it but find it's not for you?

Also if you could state your MARS SIGN that would be great!!

posted August 08, 2015 06:57 PM              

Its not for me, I don't condone it to each their own.

posted August 08, 2015 08:03 PM            

I don't think there's anything wrong with it. But it's not for me.

posted August 08, 2015 08:12 PM            

I have Sun and Venus in the 11th (no Uranus aspects) -plus- Mars conj Neptune - and I think everyone should have the freedom to make their choices in life, as long as they're happy - and not harming anyone, including themselves.
I'm asexual though so I have no desire for this. I've never experienced a sexual attraction in a casual context in my entire life.

posted August 08, 2015 09:39 PM            

Before I was married, I had all kinds of relationships.

I had a poly relationship where we were each seeing other people separately (he was a real boyfriend, it was a real relationship, but we had others on the side). We're friends still and he'd still be my boyfriend if my husband would allow it (I'm working on that).

I had a few spontaneous one night affairs with acquaintances that I thought were hot. Not like close friends, but dudes I knew well enough to know they probably wouldn't be rapists or murderers. I knew they were great dudes, but I knew that we wouldn't have a good relationship.

I had a couple of very sweet friendships that would occasionally cross into sexual encounters.

I have had sexting and naked skype with long-distance friends.

I also had a 7 year marriage where I was completely faithful in every way -- sexually and emotionally -- but unfortunately, he wasn't.

I've had sex in parking lots, on the shoulder of the freeway, in a private parking garage, pools, the Atlantic ocean, kitchen tables, stairs, inflatable camping beds, in the middle of a the street in a dark neighborhood, kitchen countertops, bathroom countertops, at work behind counters or in walk in storage areas, showers... you name it. I am VERY spontaneous in that way.

I like sex, I like porn, etc. and while my physical relations have pretty much been with men, I actually do not have a gender preference. I have been attracted to and would have dated females and transsexuals in addition to men, had the timing been right.

I definitely feel the influence of Uranus.

posted August 08, 2015 09:49 PM            

As long as everything is honest/fair, my current husband could do pretty much whatever he wants and I have given him a free pass to do so. He could have 3 girls on the side and I would be cool, just as long as I could be dating at least 3 other people too (lol).

That probably sounds crazy to some of you, but in spite of my adventurous nature, there are things he wants to do in bed (bondage & rope play) that I am totally unwilling to do and other things that I don't really enjoy, but he does. I would love for him to be able to have those experiences and still keep the woman he loves (me) so he can be totally fulfilled. And in my dream world, I would have my romances... I am such a lover, addicted to the thrill of falling in love.

posted August 08, 2015 10:10 PM            

To each their own. I'm not one to judge if two consenting adults have sex and take precautions, health-wise.

I rather have sex with the person I love. I have tried being carefree for one year in my twenties and I became too attached to people.

posted August 09, 2015 01:33 AM            

Capricorn Mars

posted August 09, 2015 03:23 AM            

I once explored my sexuality and indulged my curiosity and I did not need or even want it to be "special" I just wanted to experiment. I was careful (probably my Cappie Lilith at work) but I did it with no regret. I don't do it anymore because there's no point, I've already been there, done that.

I can see how love, sex, and marriage are not one and the same, though ideally they can mix, and I've also read up on societies that understood how these things were actually separate from some Celts and Japanese. Even Christian Europe sometimes marked a difference, at least for the upper classes, to marry out of duty/obligation and perhaps even produce an heir yet both spouses kept their own lovers outside of marriage and a husband would support his wife's boytoy and a wife could become close friends with her husband's mistress (I read of one wife who took her husband's mistress side against her husband as the two women had become such close friends), and such a mistress could be respectable, as say Madame de Pompaour who was judged more harshly for being born a commoner than being a chief mistress, aka prostitute to rich and powerful sugar daddies.

I don't see anything wrong with it for those who want to practice it though of course one should exercise some caution and common sense (or not cry about the spilled milk if they don't) and that integrity is used. That is no leading people on, lying that you're after a relationship when you know you're not, cheating on someone else (note, this doesn't preclude polyamory or open relationships, at least not necessarily), lying about your health or really anything. As long as both (or all sides) give informed consent (and that there is no coercion or exploitation involved, that is no metaphorically twisting an arm to get that "consent") then pretty much anything goes and I don't look down on them nor do I consider it degrading. Of course a person should be aware of why they've made such a choice rather than not knowing why they do it and if they hate themselves for it and/or they're doing it out of spinelessness, fear of being rejected, and so on then something is wrong but the root of the problem is mental/emotional rather than sexual.

All the above also applies to those who are very cautious about sex or practice celibacy. As long as they're honest then it's all good, but I'd be concerned if done out of self-loathing, fears of being rejected by others, lying to others, etc.

My mom uses sex (among many other methods) to manipulate and hurt people. I condemn the deceit, manipulation, and other hurtful behavior but not the sex itself. (I also don't have any respect for most of the men she uses as they're stupid and/or weak who should know she's poison, though that doesn't make what she does right. One lawyer even turned it around back on her but he was vile and I was glad when Mom ruined him even if he was as cruel to her as she's been to many others. But then if someone murdered my mom for her bitter Scorpio sting I wouldn't hold it against them despite grieving my mother's passing. Perhaps if I knew more about that lawyer's life as I do Mom's--and how she became the person she is today--then I'd have the same limited understanding for him that I do for her, don't know.)

My dad, having been hurt really bad by my mom, is now a sugar daddy, and sex is all business with no lifelong loyalty promised. I think it's sad but I understand why and since he's completely honest about it to the women he gets into such a relationship with (and to my knowledge does nothing to stop them from leaving if they choose) then it's ethical and okay in my book and I don't look down on him or the women he makes a deal with (including one who got herself through college that way before she left Dad). And when he complained of one getting all upset because she couldn't make him fall in love with her like some cheesy romance story I looked down on the woman for being stupid rather than my dad for being cold and businesslike about it as he fired her and found a new woman since he told her what she was getting into but she thought she could somehow manipulate him into changing his mind. But had Dad led her on and promised marriage, etc, then that would be different and I'd look down on him instead. (That said, I do avoid thinking of my dad engaged in it. )

The sex itself (or lack thereof) is irrelevant to me, it's the behavior around it that is important to me (that is the ethics matter but the sexual behavior itself does not). And they don't have to be like me. That is I'm not going to cast judgment on others because they have more or less sex than me or in different ways from me. Yeah, I know this is pretty radical.

posted August 09, 2015 07:39 AM              

I have nothing against casual sex between people who know what it is and have clearly spoken about this and agree to the relevant terms and conditions.

However, I can't say that I'm personally a fan of one night stands or casual sex, but I definitely think that people should be allowed to do what they want provided that they are well informed.

For me personally, I feel more comfortable with a situation that is set up 'more than a sex buddy, less than a relationship' - however, this situation is often hard to manage and keep under control. So that's why a lot of my relationships seem to die, getting on the same page is difficult. Either I want more than I initially made out, or they do it's a surprise to the other person.

I think sex is great (and experimenting with someone you trust is also great - it's also important for me to be with someone who is willing to try things within reason.) However, this is always easier to do this when you have a connection to the person i.e. a solid history/relationship and it's amazing!

posted August 09, 2015 07:50 AM            

Well, now I have a boyfriend and I'm not free on the market, but once I was single I really enjoyed flirting and not exactly just sleeping with everyone, but I liked to flirt with people I found interesting and not having to take everything that seriously.

posted August 09, 2015 09:01 AM            

Casual sex is not something I ever thought I would be interested in, but over the past month I've developed a friends with benefits type "relationship" with a guy. Due to my Mars in Cancer, it was rough at first. I had never been with someone physically who didn't have strong feelings for me, and I started developing feelings. Since I squashed those out, it's been a nice little arrangement, although I find sex with someone you love deeply to be much more fulfilling. And a lot less scary.

posted August 09, 2015 01:47 PM            

I know someone online, who met an escort that he fell in love with, and asked her to be his sugar baby. He kept trying to woo her, but she finally ended things, because she was finished with school, and was getting serious with her previously non-committal younger boyfriend. He's now using a sugar baby site, to find more dates, so that he isn't reduced to dating women his own age - who he continues to put down, but praises young women because he can buy affection from some of them. I don't have his birth information.